Girl next door

[Divorced w 3]

Single mom who’s maybe 8 years older than me. A 7. An intro and passing hellos over the last few week she moved in. Was thinking about ways to meet her. Said to myself, my kids are bored how about I ask hers to play. Mommy was napping so they get permission and come out. Her elder one is a bit old for mine so my guys and her younger play. I shoot it with the other kid on the stoop. Turns out we both play volleyball and other interests. Asks where I work. Tells me he traveled to Washington state recently and I said oh that’s cool I’m going to Sundance in Utah in January. His eyes light up. I figure I am DHV through telephone this way back to momma bear .
Momma bear comes out. I tell her she has a well spoken young man and we have quite a bit in common. Do the whole smile on the steps, chat a bit, CF and leave a few closed end statements to see if she’ll continue the convo on. She does and I disqualify myself too saying if they have to get in to get ready to go to their dads don’t let me hold them up. She says she’s got it covered, we continue to chat, asked me what time it was, says no watch I said what do you do these days, watch sun patterns? So asks which house I am and I say right here, come by any time, we all wrap it up and call it a day.

would love to get my paws in there and she is free until Tuesday. No need to rush but help a brother out on the next step. Thanks!

 

[Dr.Suave]

She´s older than you so dont give her any exclusivity. Plate status only.

 

[Divorced w 3]

She´s older than you so dont give her any exclusivity. Plate status only.

Thanks. For sure. How does one get the neighbor lady out per se. I’ve never tried to bone a neighbor.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Just ask her out with a specfic date, time, and place. If she says yes or counteroffers you are in otherwise its a no go.

 

[derby1]

go a bit more disinterested in the kids, have a bit more of cool & polite but blas'e approach.

or she will think you are doing an AFC move of using the kids to get in her pants

hth

 

[AureliusMaximus]

Single mom who’s maybe 8 years older than me.

Single moms....

Why @Divorced w 3 ???
If she was 23-25 I might understand some reasoning to plate her, but this woman is 44-45? Whyy?

 

[Divorced w 3]

I didn’t say I was going to make it a relationship. Richard Cooper has had plenty of mom plates

 

[AureliusMaximus]

I didn’t say I was going to make it a relationship.

You're only 38, why go after the old hags and dumpster dive?
You should date the 20 year range with ease..

So ye, why?!!

I Cooper has had plenty of mom plates

And even he says don't date single moms learned from his own experience. Why make the same mistakes?

 

[Divorced w 3]

You're only 38, why go after the old hags and dumpster dive?
You should date the 20 year range with ease..

So ye, why?!!


And even he says don't date single moms learned from his own experience. Why make the same mistakes?

My boy and I had a half dozen 25 year old elementary school teachers grinding on us at the bar two weeks ago. Im not leaving them unattended. I am rusty though.

I have heard the 40’s range is super horny and trying to learn for myself on that.

 

[derby1]

And even he says don't date single moms learned from his own experience. Why make the same mistakes?

chill out a bit bro, if its anything like the west midlands UK . its all thats available to him.

let him use it as practice and never take them serious, they lose all respect for you if you give them LTR anyway as they know they are low value

keep her in side lover mode for 3 months, never confirm exclusivity under 90 days, tell her to chill your enjoying dating her and getting to know her (if it gets to that point)

 

[SW15]

Single moms and neighbors are bad ideas when alone. The combination of single mom and neighbor is really bad. You could do plate status if you really wanted to, but there are far less aggravating plates out there. And, in this case, you're looking at a 45-46 year old woman when you're 38. This is a lot of trouble.

Single moms are plate status at best in a lot of cases. Relationships with single moms are bad, especially for childless males I would recommend that childless males adopt a "no single moms, no exceptions" policy. Childless males are getting more and more thirsty and settling for single moms for extended relationships. Plenty of childless males are plating single moms.

I won't give single dads that hard of a time for going for single moms for extended relationships. However, that does cause a lot of messy parenting situations, and that was covered at length in Richard Cooper's "The Unplugged Alpha" book.

A more and more common situation now are the older Gen X'ers and Baby Boomers (50+ people) forming extended relationships when all their kids are 18+ and independent. A lot of those "adult children" are put into very uncomfortable familial situations that they resent. As an "adult child", I am in one of those very uncomfortable situations myself with my mom. Let's say that family gatherings for me are sources of stress and quite unpleasant, unless I am dealing with family besides my mom.

Neighbor situations are often messy too. When a romantic interaction goes bad, you're still going to have to see that person to some extent. Neighbor situations are worse in owned housing than in rented housing. In apartment rentals, there's some gray area in dating. If the apartment complex is 200 or less units, I wouldn't date anyone in that complex. If the apartment complex is 200+ units, I wouldn't date anyone in your immediate building (garden style) or on your floor (mid or high rise). You want to have as much separation as possible. Even in a 200+ unit complex, it'd be understandable to not date within your own complex. You can date in the next apartment complex over if your apartment complex borders another complex. Neighbor stuff is literally "shiiting in your own backyard".

Older women are bad if you're 27+. If you're 27+, there are enough younger women. As a 30 something guy, dating younger is a better idea.

 

[Divorced w 3]

chill out a bit bro, if its anything like the west midlands UK . its all thats available to him.

let him use it as practice and never take them serious, they lose all respect for you if you give them LTR anyway as they know they are low value

keep her in side lover mode for 3 months, never confirm exclusivity under 90 days, tell her to chill your enjoying dating her and getting to know her (if it gets to that point)

I live in suburban New York. Im not at a loss for talent around here. I just want to get the range of experience. And she’s literally next door. She’s got that spark in her eye. Lol.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Single moms and neighbors are bad ideas when alone. The combination of single mom and neighbor is really bad. You could do plate status if you really wanted to, but there are far less aggravating plates out there. And, in this case, you're looking at a 45-46 year old woman when you're 38. This is a lot of trouble.

Single moms are plate status at best in a lot of cases. Relationships with single moms are bad, especially for childless males I would recommend that childless males adopt a "no single moms, no exceptions" policy. Childless males are getting more and more thirsty and settling for single moms for extended relationships. Plenty of childless males are plating single moms.

I won't give single dads that hard of a time for going for single moms for extended relationships. However, that does cause a lot of messy parenting situations, and that was covered at length in Richard Cooper's "The Unplugged Alpha" book.

A more and more common situation now are the older Gen X'ers and Baby Boomers (50+ people) forming extended relationships when all their kids are 18+ and independent. A lot of those "adult children" are put into very uncomfortable familial situations that they resent. As an "adult child", I am in one of those very uncomfortable situations myself with my mom. Let's say that family gatherings for me are sources of stress and quite unpleasant, unless I am dealing with family besides my mom.

Neighbor situations are often messy too. When a romantic interaction goes bad, you're still going to have to see that person to some extent. Neighbor situations are worse in owned housing than in rented housing. In apartment rentals, there's some gray area in dating. If the apartment complex is 200 or less units, I wouldn't date anyone in that complex. If the apartment complex is 200+ units, I wouldn't date anyone in your immediate building (garden style) or on your floor (mid or high rise). You want to have as much separation as possible. Even in a 200+ unit complex, it'd be understandable to not date within your own complex. You can date in the next apartment complex over if your apartment complex borders another complex. Neighbor stuff is literally "shiiting in your own backyard".

Older women are bad if you're 27+. If you're 27+, there are enough younger women. As a 30 something guy, dating younger is a better idea.

Good advice. Good I asked. I mean. She’s literally next door.

 

[SW15]

Good advice. Good I asked. I mean. She’s literally next door.

Literally next door is shiiting in your own backyard. It doesn't matter whether its a rented apartment or owned single family, detached house.

 

[derby1]

I live in suburban New York. Im not at a loss for talent around here. I just want to get the range of experience. And she’s literally next door. She’s got that spark in her eye. Lol.

thats fair enough, west mids is a dumpster dive unless you earn 80k a year and move to one of our local villages. its amazing to see the change in female behaviour when there guy earns decent money, they no how to behave.

but you dont want to go for the talent and get analysis paralysis, practice on the Low value just dont advertise it

 

[Divorced w 3]

thats fair enough, west mids is a dumpster dive unless you earn 80k a year and move to one of our local villages. its amazing to see the change in female behaviour when there guy earns decent money, they no how to behave.

but you dont want to go for the talent and get analysis paralysis, practice on the Low value just dont advertise it

I earn a lot more than that and holding up two homes and living here doesn’t even move the needle. Having $$ and a high value life is definitely important. For sure.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Literally next door is shiiting in your own backyard. It doesn't matter whether its a rented apartment or owned single family, detached house.

True. I need to put my kids ahead on this. They finally made a neighborhood friend.

 

[SW15]

True. I need to put my kids ahead on this. They finally made a neighborhood friend.

Yes, besides it is a mediocre prospect at best.

Single moms....

A more and more common situation now are the older Gen X'ers and Baby Boomers (50+ people) forming extended relationships when all their kids are 18+ and independent. A lot of those "adult children" are put into very uncomfortable familial situations that they resent. As an "adult child", I am in one of those very uncomfortable situations myself with my mom. Let's say that family gatherings for me are sources of stress and quite unpleasant, unless I am dealing with family besides my mom.

A lot of 40+ beta males and even some Alpha males think dating a woman with children who are 18+ and independent is a decent idea. After all, if her children are 18+ and not living with her, she's no longer a single mom, right? WRONG. There are lots of pitfalls in dating women with children 18+, and they range from moderately annoying to downright miserable. The longer you stay with this woman with adult children, the more likely that at least one of these things becomes applicable.

1. The holidays and other family get togethers -- Suppose this woman with adult children is fortunate enough to have her adult children living elsewhere. That's good. Guess what? Her adult children are coming home for the holidays! Meaning that you're going to be spending time with her grown children during the holidays. Her grown children will resent you. They may be cordial to your face if you're lucky, but they're going to resent spending time with you. This will also impact their relationships with their mother. It doesn't matter whether her grown children are 20 or 40, they still won't like you. If you're a single dad, your children under 18 and possibly your adult children will also resent the woman AND they will resent having to spend time with the woman's children. Both sets of adult children will dislike a forced familial interaction with people that weren't around during their formative years, regardless of whether they are 20, 30, or even 40+.

2. Her adult children will often have problems -- Her adult children likely didn't have a good father figure around and likely have some significant issues in their lives as a result of a dysfunctional home life in their formative years. Guess what -- those problems become your problems if your date her.

3. Her adult children might need to live at home again -- It's been quite common in the Millennial and Gen Z generations to live at home at some point during adulthood. Do you want to deal with some woman's adult children living at home if you get married? If her adult child loses a job (so common in recessions), her adult child may need to return to the nest.

4. Her adult children are likely to eventually have children. This is more applicable for the childless guys. The childless guys who stay with the mother of adult children might have to deal with items 1-3 above. This one could be downright miserable. If her adult children have babies, you end up playing fake grandfather to her grandbabies, which is even more miserable than playing fake father. And in this situation, remember that her adult children don't like you anyway. How fun! This goes full circle back to Item 1 that there will be some really messy family get together situations, both for childless men and for single dads.