Girl Im dating with high IL kissed a guy right infront of me!

[bukowski_merit]

She'd offer to pay for everything, drive me around everywhere (she insisted), she even called me up offering to go to the supermarket for me once as she noticed my cupboards were almost empty. Yup, that is no joke. She didn't ask for anything in return.

Hmmm.... I can understand how this can make you feel like she's more attracted to you...

But who else in a mans life often pays for everything, drives them around, fills up their cupboards when they're empty, wipes their @ss when they sh!t, etc?

That's right - your mom!

If i ask a woman to buy me something and she does - that's good for me.
If i ask a woman to drive me around and she does - that's good for me.
If i ask a woman to take me to the suppermarket and buy me some food and she does - that's good for me.
If i ask a woman to take me out to eat and she does - that's good for me.

If she makes a habit of doing these things without my request - that's NOT good for me.

She is putting herself in the mother frame. And while some sick mothers do fvck their sons - most do not.

If you're with a woman who shows that she likes doing things for you, you can:

a) always request she does more. like if she says "im going to take you to the store and buy you some potatoes" - you say "yes, you can buy me carrots and steak too" (silly example, i know, but hopefully you get my point.)

b) make a request to her before she offers to do anything.

c) get mean with her. (if she says, "im going to take you to the grocery store" and you say, "no" and she says, "no, i insist" - you just kindda ignore it from there, and don't go with her. be mean if you have too. just do not ler her baby you!)

It's all about frame control. In each of the above - YOU are telling HER how it's going to be and she's following your lead. In the examples where she's doing things for you on her own on a consistent bases - that's you living in her frame, which is not where you want to be.

---

Other than that, just make sure you fvck faster next time. Failure to escalate will get you put into the "boring guy" category quicker than any other mistake.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

It can have a profound affect on your attachment to her. She can then confuse you (which = good for her) by acting incongruent with a woman who felt that way. example: she tells you you're the best fvck she's ever had... then goes and sleeps with an ex but claims it was just sex..... as a man looking at that logically we say "if we're really the best fvck she's ever had, why would she go back and have sex with an ex?" < - But if we never cared that she said we were the best fvck - we wouldn't be so concerned with WHY! We would then just act based on how we expected to be treated.

So: Whenever a woman compliments you in a way mentioned above.... treat it as a child telling you "you're the strongest man in the world!" <- do you take a child serious when they say such a thing?

This made me lmao because it's true. How many guys on this forum have had girls tell you you "were the best fvck they've ever had?" I take it with a grain of salt and don't get my ego stroked because of it. Just like you said. It's like a child telling you you're superman.

You break up with them and they'll be spitting the same nonsense to the next boyfriend or guy they're seeing. What ELSE are they supposed to say? You svck in bed?! lol.

Duracell,

This one's drained your battery without you even getting the chance to "plug in". No loss. Just a learning experience. Take from it and you'll become zen like with the next one.

Don't delete her sitonmyfacebook right away though. If you do she'll probably notice and know she got to you. Keep it a few weeks and then delete it so she won't notice if she's been stalkerfacing your profile to see if you're still her "friend".

 

[Ease]

EDIT: Don't worry, Im more than capable of doing all those things she offered on my own and prefer to continue doing so.

Can you suck yourself off?

 

[stayfly]

The mistake you made was not banging her when you went to her house....

exactly

 

[Duracell_Bunny]

Ugh?

Shes text me twice last night, received late evening and minutes apart:
"When do you leave for your hols? x"
and "Do you wanna come over n spend the night w/me? x"

Am I right that she could just be after a bit of validation or that second one wasn't intended for me?

We didn't previously fvck, we did sleep together once on the second date but she didn't let me go that far (pulled my hand away).

I haven't responded, the reason for that is catching a bit of man flu and isolating myself at home for a couple of days to hope this bug clears in time for my holiday.

I'm thinking I could put her to one side and tread the waters when I come back but that would mean I wouldn't have seen her for almost a month?

Really I don't need this right now, she couldn't have timed it worse. I'm ill and feel like death yet I have to work like crazy so no staff members call me when I'm away, I've also gotta get everything sorted out for my travels.

 

[kingsam]

Ugh?

Shes text me twice last night, received late evening and minutes apart:
"When do you leave for your hols? x"
and "Do you wanna come over n spend the night w/me? x"

Am I right that she could just be after a bit of validation or that second one wasn't intended for me?

We didn't previously fvck, we did sleep together once on the second date but she didn't let me go that far (pulled my hand away).
not really ... you more likely failed with the Last Minute resistance

I haven't responded, the reason for that is catching a bit of man flu and isolating myself at home for a couple of days to hope this bug clears in time for my holiday.

I'm thinking I could put her to one side and tread the waters when I come back but that would mean I wouldn't have seen her for almost a month?

Really I don't need this right now, she couldn't have timed it worse. I'm ill and feel like death yet I have to work like crazy so no staff members call me when I'm away, I've also gotta get everything sorted out for my travels.

she was probably bored and pinged and number of people/men to get a convo going (the 2nd one would get most guys attention... )

dude take control and just ignore it, its better for you that way...
look forward to cyprus, aiya napa has soo many girls that are DTF its unreal...even if u have poor game u should get laid

(PS: u never replied to my PM about ur hol... )

 

[Sandow]

The same thing happened to me. Girl I was dating for a few months kissed a guy while we were at the bars. Not once but twice. I told her off the first time, didn't speak to her for two weeks. That whole time she was non stop aplogizing and calling me. I somewhat rationalized the situation by not holding a grunge for the rest of my life over this one girl, and heck, she was calling me every single day so I figured, what the ef.

When we started talking again, she was like a different person, she was all over me, she wanted to be exclusive, telling me how much she has changed and shyt because of me, how much she likes me, etc. I really thought she changed and thought there was a chance of us...but she did the exact thing again at the bars. Unbelievable! At this point, I think I have just lost all faith in girls, and have realized how effin manipulative and pyschotic girls really are. Everything that comes out of their month is complete shyt, and never ever completely trust em. I will always be skeptical about their lies and sluttyness, I dont give a shyt what anyone says.

 

[zekko]

I really thought she changed and thought there was a chance of us...but she did the exact thing again at the bars. Unbelievable!

Can a leopard change its spots? Usually with women, what you see is what you get. There are better ones out there, you just have to find them.

 

[Sandow]

Can a leopard change its spots? Usually with women, what you see is what you get. There are better ones out there, you just have to find them.

Yea I guess that's the only way to see it. I guess I was trying to see the better side of people, and I believe some have it. But this kind of thinking can get us in trouble sometimes.

 

[Prodigy746]

Dood you could have had sex with this girl after she invited you in. You seem awkward .. i dont even think this girl cares much about relationships right now. She just got out of a 2 year relationships, she just wants to have sex w random guys for a bit, most girls are like guys, when we get out of a long term relationships we want to take a brake from dating and explore the field-have fun- sex as many chicks as possible.