Girl I thought was in the bag acting strange, another guy?

[Adakkon]

I met this HB in a sociology class. She came on pretty strong. We'd flirt, but I was seeing someone already so I never asked her out. After awhile she started asking ME to do stuff with her outside of class, starting with studying, later other things. And I'd do them. She knew I was seeing someone (I told her it wasn't serious) and it didn't seem to phase her at all.

Well I broke it off with the other girl, and go over to her dorm common area to "study for an upcoming test". I let her know my other girl and I were fighting and I broke it off with her.

Here's some backstory before the next part, the night before she'd said something to me that made it sound like she was seeing someone, and I asked her about it and she said she was still single.

Well after I tell her that she mentions that she's apparently been seeing someone but he doesn't want to make anything official and she does. This was like a low blow because she was my backup plan.

Well as we start studying she still keeps making flirtatious and outright obvious come ons towards me. We are sitting next to each other on a couch studying and she keeps getting up against me, and finally I say "It's alright if you want to get up against me, but we can make this more comfortable because your elbow is in my rib" and she puts my arm around her and leans back into me.

We start going over racial stuff in our book and she asks me if I would ever date outside my race. (She is a very fine black HB, I'm white) I say of course. Later on she asks me to give her a massage, and then she gives me one back.

It's late and she takes me to her room. We are both sitting on her bed watching tv with my arm around her. I ask if I wasn't here tonight would that other guy she was talking about earlier be here? She says no "he's just a friend". I move in for a kiss, take a few, then she pulls me away and says she is too tired. (it is like 2 a.m. and our test is in 6 hours)

She walks me out, then hugs me and gives me a kiss as I walk out.

Now, after the test I talk to her and things seem a bit off. I text her later that day asking if she wants to do something the next day and she doesn't respond. I've texted her many times before, and she's never not responded within minutes before. It's been a day and I don't want to text/call her because she never responded and I don't want to come off desperate or anything.

What do you guys think is going on? I think maybe she's deciding between me and this other guy, although after that night I thought I'd had her.

 

[christz]

see my topic "let the truth be told"

anyway yeah it sounds like you get her intrest, as for haveing her no.. if there is another guy the best way to defend against that is to not care, don't bring it up if she doesn't. (and if she doesn't its all the better) let the other guy worry about you..

the more he complains to her about you, the better you look

as for her decideing between you two.. probably so yoru job is to keep playing your cards the way you are.. she didn't respond to your txt, fine OH WELL txt her in a few days if she doesn't txt you back saying, what's up and that's it. Don't let her weirdness seem like it bothers you.

 

[lebRambo]

Ive seen this before. Strong IOIs, then something (kissing) happens and they back off a little.

She obviously cares about your opinion (since she has known you for a while). Maybe she is worried about what you think of her? Maybe she thinks you find her a little slutty now since she was getting on with you while things werent resolved with other dude? Thats most commonly the reason: girl does something, feels a little slutty, stops talking to protect her image to you and herself.

Give her a couple of days and then message her again. If she doesnt respond, i'd consider giving her the cold shoulder, and then the NEXT.

 

[Juan_Man]

You need to chill out and stop being so easy. You were probably a lot more smooth and relaxed around her when you were still seeing the other girl. Now that the other girl is gone, you seem a little desperate to make sure your "backup plan" doesn't fall through. You need to realize that there is no such thing as a backup plan because a girl can lose interest at any time for whatever reason. Don't do anything more with this girl. You have done enough. If she is interested in you, then she will let you know. In the meantime, keep talking to other women.

 

[Astral100]

The answer is simple. You have done quite a few major mistakes that turned her off. She was basically testing you the whole evening to see if you were the man enough, and sad as it might be you proved her beyound the shadow of a doubt that you coudn't handle her or even create an attraction with her.

Main points:
1)

After awhile she started asking ME to do stuff with her outside of class, starting with studying, later other things. And I'd do them.

Doesn't look like you even tried to resist. You know how they call guys that do everything a girl wants? That's right - wussy.
2)

She knew I was seeing someone (I told her it wasn't serious) and it didn't seem to phase her at all.

You did a good thing here - made her aware that other girls like you, and that if she wants you it would be a challenge for her.
3)

Well I broke it off with the other girl, and go over to her dorm common area to "study for an upcoming test". I let her know my other girl and I were fighting and I broke it off with her.

You shouldn't have told her anything of the sort because it clearly communicates that you are now free and want to get with her. Remember - the moment you admit that you like a girl, no matter how subtle it is, is the moment you lose.

4)

Well after I tell her that she mentions that she's apparently been seeing someone but he doesn't want to make anything official and she does. This was like a low blow because she was my backup plan.

This was a TEST to see how would you react on this. The Right way was to not let it get to you and make some joke about it. Whereas you probably made it apparent to her that it was a shock for you. You lost this round.
5)

Well as we start studying she still keeps making flirtatious and outright obvious come ons towards me. We are sitting next to each other on a couch studying and she keeps getting up against me, and finally I say "It's alright if you want to get up against me, but we can make this more comfortable because your elbow is in my rib" and she puts my arm around her and leans back into me.

Not very bad, but she obviously lacked a challenge here. After her obvious come ons on you it would be better to say something like - "I know you want me, but I am not that easy. If you want a piece of me you gotta wine and dine my first. So please, try to control yourself." (Copyright by DD)

6)

We start going over racial stuff in our book and she asks me if I would ever date outside my race. (She is a very fine black HB, I'm white) I say of course.

Ouch... You have to learn to disagree with girls. Even better make a ****y and funny comment. Something like "Come on, whe are both adults here. Why don't you just come right out and say like me?" And add something like "Although seeing as you are black and I am white, I am not sure you could handle me" You can then take it in any direction you want.
7)

Later on she asks me to give her a massage, and then she gives me one back.

Another TEST you failed. You should have told her something like - "why don't you give me one first?" or something like that.
8)

We are both sitting on her bed watching tv with my arm around her. I ask if I wasn't here tonight would that other guy she was talking about earlier be here?

That was a WUSSY remark that shows her that you CARE about other guys in her life. As soon as you start clinging it is a big turn off for a girl.

9)

I move in for a kiss, take a few, then she pulls me away and says she is too tired.

No wonder she is tired (of you). You could have still salvaged the situation if you would use 2 steps forward, one step back kiss technique, but since you failed to create any sexual tension op to this point it was pretty much doomed from that then on.
10)

She walks me out, then hugs me and gives me a kiss as I walk out.

Probably thinking "Finally I got rid of this BOOORING guy that couldn't handle even ONE of my tests, acts WUSSY and CLINGY"
11)

Now, after the test I talk to her and things seem a bit off

Hmmm... I wonder why....
12)

What do you guys think is going on?

I think that this black girl invited you to confirm whether you were a dating/mating material. However since you so successfully failed to create any attraction and instead killed off a small amount that there was before you don't have many chances with her now. Your best option is to NEXT her and move on. Perhaps when you learn to challenge girls and you will have a better chance with them.

Good luck