Girl has initiated contact last three days, but has cancelled date due to sickness

[Harry Wilmington]

@Maximus Rex OMG, that's the BEST gif ever.

@OP: Okay, so she said she's free Sunday - great! At the very least it means she's somewhat interested if she's giving you a concrete date.

HOWEVER...

There are still mistakes being made here:

1. If she gives you a day and you don't think you can actually make the day and time at a reasonable hour, don't agree to it or leave the phone call/messaging session without coming up with an agreeable time for both of you. (BTW: this is why I recommend phone calls. See how long it took her to message you? This could have been settled in 5 min with a PHONE CALL.) We want favorable date odds here, and the odds of her being free to go on a date with you past 10 pm when she has to go to work the next day (assuming she has that kind of job) is very small - like, even if she LIKES you, she may still be ready for actual sleep at that time.

2. Whether you go the phone call route or message route, you get ALL the details of the date down in one session. You have a better chance of getting a girl on a date by getting all the details in ONE session than using multiple sessions to lock everything down. (To learn why this is, go HERE.) Get the date, time, location, EVERYTHING down, and then...

3. Stop contacting her so much in between dates. Once you make the date, you should stop initiating messages/calls, and avoid contacting her until the date when you pick her up or meet you. If she hits you up keep it short, but the less you call her BEFORE the date, the more she'll look forward to seeing you ON the date.

Hope this helps!

 

[Maximus Rex]

Should I text her tomorrow checking in on her and how she is feeling?

How will doing this benefit you?

 

[NSX-R]

I wonder why everyone thinks that this chick is not interested. She replies quite positively to all of the texts. My last ex gf was a pain in the @$$ to make a conversation with before I make her confess her love to me. She would stay silent if I wasn't saying anything but whatever i was saying she would always reply positively even through texting.
This chick op is talking about is no different than my ex gf.

Dude make your intentions clear. My favorite line is this. " We either go out or bye bye " . ( Thanks Ruler)
It's a bit harsh but makes things clear and you know how this chick feels. No need to waste your time.

 

[stevo]

Quit texting bro.
Also quit with all the "trying to be funny" text messages.

You both text so much that there's really no burning feeling for her to see you because she constantly hears from you.

I noticed your first post you said she's initiating, now your later post has you initiating and that is not a good sign, turn that ship around.

Stop initiating. If she hit you up, stop the "cute msging", get to the point, get off the phone, escalate on date.

 

[fmfan08]

At least she talks to you but you have to see her real IL in you (interest level).
Keep the convo shorter and straight to meeting up with her
Don´t throw cuddles and gay/AFC shiit like that you haven´t f-closed her yet.
If i was you i would take her for coffee or a drink on sunday no need to go bowling and then escalate from the date to end up fvcking her!

Part of me was 50/50 writing the cuddle bit, so i'll keep it in mind not to write stuff like that too early on. No doubt i'll be working until 10pm on Sunday though, manager likes to keep us until then on that day to get stuff done. I'll have to re-arrange.

 

[fmfan08]

Quit texting bro.
Also quit with all the "trying to be funny" text messages.

You both text so much that there's really no burning feeling for her to see you because she constantly hears from you.

I noticed your first post you said she's initiating, now your later post has you initiating and that is not a good sign, turn that ship around.

Stop initiating. If she hit you up, stop the "cute msging", get to the point, get off the phone, escalate on date.

She's just initiated text now but i'm about to go sleep anyway. I think i'll only initate with her to set up a date, but what if we have one set and she tries texting inbetween?

 

[Maximus Rex]

She's just initiated text now but i'm about to go sleep anyway. I think i'll only initate with her to set up a date, but what if we have one set and she tries texting inbetween?

Rex has a suggestion. Do what you were doing before you met this chick, which is living your life. Guess what will happen? What Rex? She'll notice that you have things and interests going on other than her and she just might become more attracted to you.

 

[fmfan08]

The text I got off her last night was "i'm going to start killing drunk people in 3,2,1..."

I replied at midday today to confirm my time on the rota, turns out I am off Sunday. My reply was "Didn't have you down as the naughty type... I'm off tomorrow so i'll see you at 7 at the same place"

Weirdly enough as it was sending the text, she sent another saying "Morning!!!", so i'm not sure she might have seen it and she might have turned her phone right as it sent. It was in a place where my signal was GPRS or something. Tbh i'm more worried about my reply being 5 seconds after hers

It's been nearly ten hours and no reply off her to confirm, which is why I wondered.

Rex, I'm hoping this is the right thing to do... That I should assume she got the text and understood the details because asking if she got it, etc would appear needy.

I'm thinking of texting her on the day of our date (tomorrow) saying "See you tonight" rather than "are we still on?", if she didn't receive the text and seems oblivious I'll re-arrange it, most likely for the last time though if it was a technical error.

 

[fastlife]

@fmfam08

Honestly, you're trying wayyyyy to hard. Do you want to know a secret? It really doesn't matter what you text her, what your date ideas are, how/when she responds. You do not have control over her response.

So stop reacting. Put your phone down. Quit strategizing. It is out of your control.

Focus on the things you can control. Quit trying to be so cutesy. Quit talking about cuddling. Quit thinking so much about a girl you don't really even know. Put your phone away, dude. If she's down for Sunday, she'll confirm with you. Promise. At this point I wouldn't initiate anything. She knows you want to see her. She gets it.

If I was in your shoes if I really, really wanted this girl I'd send her an obvious booty call text in 3 weeks, give or take--enough time for her to actually consolidate a fear of loss and to forget how much you were pressuring her with over-investment. If she wants to see you before then, there's a good chance she'll make it happen before you have to send that text (but those texts work wonders at resurrecting girls--months later, sometimes years later). Probably seems totally counter-intuitive from your POV but you're heading dangerously close to unraveling.

 

[fmfan08]

@fmfam08

Honestly, you're trying wayyyyy to hard. Do you want to know a secret? It really doesn't matter what you text her, what your date ideas are, how/when she responds. You do not have control over her response.

So stop reacting. Put your phone down. Quit strategizing. It is out of your control.

Focus on the things you can control. Quit trying to be so cutesy. Quit talking about cuddling. Quit thinking so much about a girl you don't really even know. Put your phone away, dude. If she's down for Sunday, she'll confirm with you. Promise. At this point I wouldn't initiate anything. She knows you want to see her. She gets it.

If I was in your shoes if I really, really wanted this girl I'd send her an obvious booty call text in 3 weeks, give or take--enough time for her to actually consolidate a fear of loss and to forget how much you were pressuring her with over-investment. If she wants to see you before then, there's a good chance she'll make it happen before you have to send that text (but those texts work wonders at resurrecting girls--months later, sometimes years later). Probably seems totally counter-intuitive from your POV but you're heading dangerously close to unraveling.

I see what you're saying, but do I still go to arranged place at arranged time tomorrow? Because if she ended up not receiving the text, don't want her thinking i'm ignoring

 

[fastlife]

I see what you're saying, but do I still go to arranged place at arranged time tomorrow? Because if she ended up not receiving the text, don't want her thinking i'm ignoring

She got your text. If she's at all invested she'll get back to you to confirm things between now and then.

 

[fmfan08]

I don't like telling a woman "text me when you have time for a date". It's giving her the frame, and lowering the value of your date request; it kills momentum. Remember, the man is supposed to lead. It comes across like you have nothing else going on, no other options, and that she is your number one priority. This will lower your value - unless you're sure the woman already likes you a lot, or you're in a LTR.

Next time she's 'ill' text something like "no worries, we'll speak soon", and disappear for a week or so. She'll naturally start to think "where has that guy who was giving me attention gone?". Spend this time approaching other women or on your career/hobbies. Your next date request will have more value, and she'll make more of an effort.

Also, try and get the time and logistics of the date sorted in one text exchange - not over multiple days. Try to at least kiss-close on date one: hiding your d*ck is a huge mistake. Be unashamed of your sex-drive; she'll respect you more for it.

I've told her to meet me at the same place for 7 though, so I have lead with my plans. My problem right now is that I texted her those plans today when I had rubbish phone signal and as it was sending she sent me a text, so i'm unsure she saw it with the lack of a response.

And we've had two dates already, kissed on both. It's something you have to follow in the thread as I don't update the OP.

 

[fmfan08]

She got your text. If she's at all invested she'll get back to you to confirm things between now and then.

Ok, should I just go to the place/time still because she might have read it and understood but not replied.

Honestly tomorrow i'm considering sending "see you tonight" or "wear something cute tonight", that first one is a line i've used before both dates with her and confirmed whether she might potentially flake

 

[Maximus Rex]

Rex, I'm hoping this is the right thing to do...

The "right thing to do?" Listen dude. Nothing you have done thus far in this thread was the "right thing," for you to do.

That I should assume she got the text and understood the details

If a Person Whats to Speak to You, They'll Contact You, http://www.sosuave.net/forum/index....ts-to-speak-to-you-theyll-contact-you.228753/

Take Her Lack of an Answer as Her Answer, http://www.sosuave.net/forum/index.php?threads/take-her-lack-of-an-answer-as-her-answer.207525/

because asking if she got it, etc would appear needy.

This sh*t is almost funny. The irony is that if dude was with so concerned about looking needy, he wouldn't have did most of the beta male faggot sh*t that clearly demonstrated needy behavior in this thread.

I'm thinking of texting her on the day of our date (tomorrow) saying "See you tonight" rather than "are we still on?",

I've asked you this before on this thread, but you've conveniently neglected to answer the question. So I'll ask you again, how in the f*ck is doing this suppose to benefit you? You do realize that you're coming off like the dude Beyoncé'em was singing about in this song.

Bug A Boo-Destiny's Child

Don't go now, but right now and read, my approach journal, http://www.sosuave.net/forum/index....imus-rex-reports-from-the-field.177649/page-3 Rex's Special Place and His "Promotion," Dateline 28-02-14, Post 59. That's what a chick does when she wants to go out with you. Even though T.H.Y.C.E.A.C. asked Rex out to the movies, when a chick wants to go out with you, she'll not only REMEMBER the date, she CALL YOU TO CONFIRM.

if she didn't receive the text and seems oblivious I'll re-arrange it,

Dude, you really need to post a link to this broad's online profile. You're over heard acting like ole girl's looks are on par with

Not that it would excuse your creepy, needy, stalker dude behavior, but at least ole Rex could half ass understand why your stressing this chick's picture so much.

most likely for the last time though if it was a technical error.

That's another question that I have. If you're on a dating site, why are you acting as if this chick is one of ten that's on the site? How come you're not contacting and setting up dates with the other women on the site? I tried to start an awards ceremony for So Suave a few years back, but nothing came of it. However, I'm going to start keeping a log of various threads. fmfan08, with this very sad thread, you're going to get nominate for the "SoSuave.com Creepy, Needy, Thirsty, Stalker Dude of the Year." Stop this sh*t, mayne. Finally' these quotes from unknown broad members apply to you, bruh.

"SHE IS NOT REALLY INTO YOU. She could be f*cking other guys or not. She could be going on dates or not. She could just change her mind and don't feel like seeing you. Whatever the constant here is, she is not really interested in you."

"She did not text you cause she thinks you're sh*t, so you don't deserve good manners."

 

[fmfan08]

She did contact me first today though, in fact she sent me three texts in a row which would suggest interest to some degree, just my problem was sending her that text because we both sent ours at the same time, she might have missed it because she's been quite overly eager these past two weeks in responding.

I don't know I give up, rather not be mocked about it.

I'll do what I know has worked the previous two dates with her and confirm on the morning of our date and assume it's going ahead until she says otherwise. If she says otherwise i'll delete her number and move on.

 

[Maximus Rex]

She did contact me first today though, in fact she sent me three texts in a row which would suggest interest to some degree

Don't confuse her "perceive interest," with her using you as an instrument to assuage her boredom.

she might have missed it because she's been quite overly eager these past two weeks in responding.

This is sh*t that women do, see things are they want them to be as opposed to what they're really are.

I don't know I give up, rather not be mocked about it.

Stop being a sensitive b*tch.

I'll do what I know has worked the previous two dates with her and confirm on the morning of our date and assume it's going ahead until she says otherwise.

Then what the f*ck did you make the thread for then? What we have heard is another one of those idiot f*cks who will make a thread claiming that they want advice, but in reality they want validation and approval for a predetermined plan of action.