Girl gives me email instead of number, Wtf?!

[Kal0051]

Hey guys, been a while since I last posted (just been lurking here and been busy with my personal ****). Anyway, been out trying to meet girls, so far haven't had a date since Jan. All I've been meeting are girls that were either attention *****s or just weren't interested (but that's not what this is about). A few weeks ago I meet this chick that had just gotten back from a trip through Asia. We talked for a bit, I asked for her number and instead she gave me her email and told me to add her to msn. I didn't push the issue, just figured she was being careful. So we've chatted a few times on msn since then, but since I was busy with exams I didn't ask her out til this week. Basically I said that we should grab a drink one night soon. She said depends which night and I asked her what her schedules like. She admitted she's a bit busy this week so I said to give me her number and I'll call her to go out next week. That's when she told me she doesn't give out her number much because apparently some guy she gave it too had been making weird phone call ( maybe bs, maybe not). Instead she told me to send her a email because she checks her email alot. Now, this is ****ed, the minimum I know is she either is not interested or has very low interest. Should this be a automatic NEXT and delete her off msn? Thanks. And yes, I have little patience for women these days, got better things to do than waste my time with girls that aren't interested.

 

[Tiguere]

Next her. That was a bs excuse and you shouldve called her out on it. Summer is almost here and its time to expand your social circle. And I already know your social circle is nonexistent at this point since you still in 2010 use msn to setup dates.

 

[Kal0051]

Next her. That was a bs excuse and you shouldve called her out on it. Summer is almost here and its time to expand your social circle. And I already know your social circle is nonexistent at this point since you still in 2010 use msn to setup dates.

actually I barely use msn at all. The only reason I used it to ask her out was because that was the only way I had to contact her. But yeah, I am planning to do some partying since I no longer have classes and more time to socialize (something I've barely done in months). I agree the excuse seemed bs, but didn't see the point of calling her out on it, what would that have done exactly...

Edit: she's not the first girl that gave me her email on the initial meet, but most of the others gave me their number after 1 or 2 email/IMs

 

[In$tinct]

There are times I just ask for the email addy, anyway.

Sending her an email isn’t a huge time investment on your part. Just keep it short and simple, and see where it goes.

She doesn’t respond: You have your answer

She responds: Play the email exchange game a few times, and then drop number question again.

I don't use online chats... MSN is on you

 

[kingsam]

that was one drawn out rejection!

emailing is like texts but worse

 

[Kal0051]

that was one drawn out rejection!

emailing is like texts but worse

lol, your probably right. Love how she gave me this long ass reason why she didn't want to give me her number. If it was all bs I'll give her credit for being creative.

 

[vatoloco]

So we've chatted a few times on msn since then, but since I was busy with exams I didn't ask her out til this week. Basically I said that we should grab a drink one night soon. She said depends which night and I asked her what her schedules like. She admitted she's a bit busy this week so I said to give me her number and I'll call her to go out next week.

This is why I don't like to pvssyfoot around when it comes to dating women. Tell her "Hey, let's go out for a drink on Thursday night." She either says "Yes, let's go", "I can't Thursday but I can make it XYZday." Anything else, I say you NEXT her.

 

[SandHawk]

I've seen this happen to a good mate of my. He meets girl, girl is interested, he gets e-mail address. They hang on MSN a few times, chat, he drops the digits question, she is reluctant because she had a creepy dude harass her in the past, so he tells her to call him instead whenever she wants.

2 days later, he's banging her brains out.

She is being cautious, and you guys want to next her? I think being cautious is a good trait after some f*cknut harassed you in the past. My ex was stupid enough to hand the digits to some **** from highschool who harassed her in the past, and when she thought he had a chance and got turned down, he started stalking again.

I'd say, keep this going for a while and see where it goes. Most likely, she is cautious. Set up a date over mail with her for icecream, and if it all goes well and it's genuinely fun, try again.

 

[amoka]

Meet a woman at the swimming pool yesterday. Chat with her a bit at the pool. Did not ask her for number because I did not have my phone on me. After the pool, saw her outside the pool while I was driving home. I pulled over, and:
Amoka: "Hey, what are you up to this evening?"
Her: "I am just going back to the office to do some thing.."
Amoka: "Alright, let me get your number and we can get together sometime.."
Her: "Alright, let me give you my office number..." Hell, NO. I have her full name and I can easily get that from the school's directory.
Amoka:" No. Let me get you mobile number instead."
Her: "I am married but..."
Amoka: "Don't worry, I am married too...."
Her: "XXX.XXX.XXXX... call me sometimes so can have lunch."

The point is to be persistence on what you want. If she does not want to give you her mobile number and want to give you an email, tell her her you're not interested in that.

Oh, the other day I went swing dancing and this chick I started dancing with... but due to the noisy environment, I told asked her for her number and she told me she does not give out her number easily and offered to give me her email instead. I told her NO THANKS and went and started dancing with another chick in the crowd.

 

[WORKEROUTER]

RULE:

Don't ever let a chick give you her email if you ask for her number. It means she has low interest (for a variety of reasons) OR she's so immature that she's "scared" of giving you her number.

I've had this happen to me countless times, and believe me, don't fall for it. Don't let yourself turn into a wussy boy. You were being a man by requesting her NUMBER not her email.

When a girl proposes that to me, I tell her very frankly I requested her number not her email. I decline her email completely and tell her I would never use it anyway. Half the time the girl is surprised at this and will give the number. The other half..who cares?

 

[DonutMan]

I check my email on my phone anytime anywhere when I get an email. Phone vibrates and I check it. At the same time I almost never answer the phone when people call between the hours of 8am and 7pm, because I'm working and can't talk on the phone around clients at work. Just saying it's not necessarily a deal breaker.

 

[kingsam]

I check my email on my phone anytime anywhere when I get an email. Phone vibrates and I check it. At the same time I almost never answer the phone when people call between the hours of 8am and 7pm, because I'm working and can't talk on the phone around clients at work. Just saying it's not necessarily a deal breaker.

your not a woman
women cant resist a phone call, but you should try and call when they are most liekly not at work, most people dont work that late really

emails (like texting) give the girl a lot more control to them than a phone call

---------
WHEN THEY LIKE YOU THEY MAKE IT EASY
email is not "easy", is she likes you and is same she will want you to have her #

 

[TL79]

Had something like that happen to me, and she gave the same reason 'Some guys have harrassed me before who I gave my number to so I'm very careful about who I give it to, not saying you would do that because you seem nice but I thought those other guys were nice to', she said something like that. I did get the email but she says she's bad at communicating through email outside of work so I just said screw it and figured she wasn't interested. What I regret doing is giving her my number and email instead, she said if something happens then she'll give me a call but I doubt it, well you live and you learn, next time I'll just tell them I don't want the email and move on.

 

[I'm in the Mood]

Kal, if you can't solve this problem yourself, next her.

Through reading this thread, I find the real problem is that YOU are being too needy.

You created a topic on your frustration about not getting a lousy phone number. Digits don't mean SH!T. I'm not going to go any deeper into this than telling you to realize that you could get all the phone numbers in the world and still not get the girl.

Maybe you don't realize it, but there actually are some girls that believe there are guys out there who will abuse them. When it comes to giving out personal contacts for potentially sexual reasons, they are scared. I had a long discussion about this with my college adviser, and she explained that there are guys out there who WILL call/text non-stop, and a girl's phone is a private, personal device that they don't want to receive any abuse through.

Whether there really ARE guys out there who will call a girl 100 times a day or not doesn't matter. What matters is that some women have this belief, and you need to accept that some women are uncomfortable with giving out their numbers. It really depends on the woman.

On the other hand, with an email, you can just delete/block/report someone if you don't want to deal with them. But if she knew that beforehand, she wouldn't have given you her email in the first place!

Just forget about it!

Women operate more emotionally than logically, so if you push her saying, "WHY won't you give me YOUR phone number?" you are demonstrating two things:
1) Neediness. (She's already given you a way to contact her. If she wants to give you her number later on, that's up to her.)
2) Pushiness. (You said she gave you a "long ass reason" on why she didn't want to give out her phone number. If you pushed her into this, that's being too pushy. On the other hand, if you were indifferent about it and just asked "How come?" without forcing a reason on her, then I apologize. That would be persistence, and the long reason was probably given because she's attracted to you and wanted to save face.)

You could have been well on your way to getting her into your bed, but this "Girl gives me email instead of number, Wtf?!" thing comes along, and now your confidence is crushed.

Ask for emails. Guys are always all about the digits. Be different!

 

[nismo-4]

When a girl wants to offer her email address, either get the # or next her. That guy making the weird calls might be talking sexy to her and she's logically denying it by using a bs excuse and she's taking that pipe nightly.

 

[WORKEROUTER]

Kal, if you can't solve this problem yourself, next her.

Through reading this thread, I find the real problem is that YOU are being too needy.

You created a topic on your frustration about not getting a lousy phone number. Digits don't mean SH!T. I'm not going to go any deeper into this than telling you to realize that you could get all the phone numbers in the world and still not get the girl.

Maybe you don't realize it, but there actually are some girls that believe there are guys out there who will abuse them. When it comes to giving out personal contacts for potentially sexual reasons, they are scared. I had a long discussion about this with my college adviser, and she explained that there are guys out there who WILL call/text non-stop, and a girl's phone is a private, personal device that they don't want to receive any abuse through.

Whether there really ARE guys out there who will call a girl 100 times a day or not doesn't matter. What matters is that some women have this belief, and you need to accept that some women are uncomfortable with giving out their numbers. It really depends on the woman.

On the other hand, with an email, you can just delete/block/report someone if you don't want to deal with them. But if she knew that beforehand, she wouldn't have given you her email in the first place!

Just forget about it!

Women operate more emotionally than logically, so if you push her saying, "WHY won't you give me YOUR phone number?" you are demonstrating two things:
1) Neediness. (She's already given you a way to contact her. If she wants to give you her number later on, that's up to her.)
2) Pushiness. (You said she gave you a "long ass reason" on why she didn't want to give out her phone number. If you pushed her into this, that's being too pushy. On the other hand, if you were indifferent about it and just asked "How come?" without forcing a reason on her, then I apologize. That would be persistence, and the long reason was probably given because she's attracted to you and wanted to save face.)

You could have been well on your way to getting her into your bed, but this "Girl gives me email instead of number, Wtf?!" thing comes along, and now your confidence is crushed.

Ask for emails. Guys are always all about the digits. Be different!

Although I agree with your thoughts, I still don't advise the email. Just because it's different doesn't make it beneficial.

Here's better advice: Don't come across as a needy guy who's going to call her 20 times in a row.

It's HOW YOU SAY IT...guys you need to learn to master the art of getting the number in a way that suggests you MIGHT call them sometime. Don't ever committ to telling them you'll call. I like to use this: "I've been really busy lately but if I have some time next week I can give you a call and we can get together."

There's absolutely no need to accept an email adress over the digits. The number is what you want, trust me. And if a girl REALLY IS too scared to give out her number (NOT THE MAJORITY), then why would you want to waste your time anyway? Even if you end up getting with her she's probably going to be a total prude anyway.

So guys, ALWAYS aim for the number, never settle for less. Work on the approach, the dialogue, and let that overcome a women's objectives rather than falling into the email trap.

 

[WORKEROUTER]

Kal, if you can't solve this problem yourself, next her.

Through reading this thread, I find the real problem is that YOU are being too needy.

You created a topic on your frustration about not getting a lousy phone number. Digits don't mean SH!T. I'm not going to go any deeper into this than telling you to realize that you could get all the phone numbers in the world and still not get the girl.

Maybe you don't realize it, but there actually are some girls that believe there are guys out there who will abuse them. When it comes to giving out personal contacts for potentially sexual reasons, they are scared. I had a long discussion about this with my college adviser, and she explained that there are guys out there who WILL call/text non-stop, and a girl's phone is a private, personal device that they don't want to receive any abuse through.

Whether there really ARE guys out there who will call a girl 100 times a day or not doesn't matter. What matters is that some women have this belief, and you need to accept that some women are uncomfortable with giving out their numbers. It really depends on the woman.

On the other hand, with an email, you can just delete/block/report someone if you don't want to deal with them. But if she knew that beforehand, she wouldn't have given you her email in the first place!

Just forget about it!

Women operate more emotionally than logically, so if you push her saying, "WHY won't you give me YOUR phone number?" you are demonstrating two things:
1) Neediness. (She's already given you a way to contact her. If she wants to give you her number later on, that's up to her.)
2) Pushiness. (You said she gave you a "long ass reason" on why she didn't want to give out her phone number. If you pushed her into this, that's being too pushy. On the other hand, if you were indifferent about it and just asked "How come?" without forcing a reason on her, then I apologize. That would be persistence, and the long reason was probably given because she's attracted to you and wanted to save face.)

You could have been well on your way to getting her into your bed, but this "Girl gives me email instead of number, Wtf?!" thing comes along, and now your confidence is crushed.

Ask for emails. Guys are always all about the digits. Be different!

Although I agree with your thoughts, I still don't advise the email. Just because it's different doesn't make it beneficial.

Here's better advice: Don't come across as a needy guy who's going to call her 20 times in a row.

It's HOW YOU SAY IT...guys you need to learn to master the art of getting the number in a way that suggests you MIGHT call them sometime. Don't ever committ to telling them you'll call. I like to use this: "I've been really busy lately but if I have some time next week I can give you a call and we can get together. How about we EXCHANGE numbers."

I exchange numbers because I know right then and there if she's giving me a fake number. If she says she doesn't have her phone, then I read the number back purposely messing up one digit to make sure it's not a fake. ALWAYS do this. If anything it feels fantastic when you catch a broad trying to pull that crap because then you can call her out on it and make her look ridiculous.

There's absolutely no need to accept an email adress over the digits. The number is what you want, trust me. And if a girl REALLY IS too scared to give out her number (NOT THE MAJORITY), then why would you want to waste your time anyway? Even if you end up getting with her she's probably going to be a total prude anyway. If a girl has high interest in you and you don't come across as a needy guy, then believe me most of the time she'll get over her fears and exchange numbers.

So guys, ALWAYS aim for the number, never settle for less. Work on the approach, the dialogue, and let that overcome a women's objectives rather than falling into the email trap.

 

[souperblitz99]

Sounds familiar

yeah I know what you mean bud:. That usually is a sign that she isn't interested. I had a similar situation. I asked a girl out and she said she would email her number to me. Give her your number and see where that goes. Ask her to call you. I wish you the best of luck. Don't focus on one girl. I have the tendency to do the same thing. Best of luck.

 

[SgtSplacker]

When i'm being distanced, I test interest. Id send her some funny links in MSN and see how she responds to them. If she thinks your funny she may want to hang and continue having a good time. If she barely comments then ignore her for a bit.

 

[CuriousGirl]

I don't know why you're making out like it's such a big effort to pursue it, she gave you an email address, doesn't take much to send an email even if she's not that interested. Still, I think if she was going to make excuses she would have made an excuse where she wasn't going to give you anything, and she certainly wouldn't have offered her email instead. She would have just said "I don't give out my number blah blah blah" and waited for your response.

Also you'd be surprised how common creepy phonecalls are, a year or so ago I received some for a while and it does freak you out so I can see why if it is true, why she'd be more careful. I used to just give my phone number out because it was easier than being pressed for it further after rejecting, but now I only do it if I'm genuinely interested.