Girl comes back after ghosting me

[jboyd5]

~2 months ago: She showed heavy signs of attraction. Got her number, initiated a date, she didnt answer.

Had normal interactions and conversation during this time.

Now: 11pm she texts me asking if I am still willing to go out for a drink, it wasnt the right timing when I asked.

Never had this happen to me before. My attraction for her is mostly based of her looks. I feel like she is just an attention seeker. Always hear her talking about guys that have hit her up when she talks to the other girls.

Even though its a sure date and even sex, my minds telling me no, but my body is telling me yes.

 

[El Payaso]

Texting you at 11pm to ask if you're "still willing for drinks" is a gross disrespect of your time. She probably got rejected by someone or is feeling depressed so she decided to fish through her "standby contacts" to see if anyone will take a bite.

 

[Thorninmyside]

She got dumped by someone else and came running.

 

[QuadDeuces]

Sure invite her over for some netflix and tell her to bring a bottle of wine.

She probably got dumped or is branch swinging back on the carousel.

 

[nismo-4]

That 6'8" Crossfit trainer flaked out on her for a sex session with the Oakland Raiders' cheerleaders and now she's looking for a beta plan.

She better come over with a bottle of wine, a pepperoni pizza, and suck my dik when she enters the house. Anything else= gone!

You were in second place.

 

[jboyd5]

I turned her down

 

[GT40]

Nice work brother. Good job. Thinking with the right head

 

[PapiChulo]

I turned her down

You make us all proud. But I doubt it's the last time you are gonna hear from her.

 

[Dash Riprock]

Smart move nexting her.

I'm 99% sure she just broke up with someone and probably got dumped or in a fight with her boyfriend. She can't stand being alone so she went through her contacts/orbiters looking for a bite. This happened to me a few months back with a girl I saw off and on. After breaking a date 3 months earlier, she called all upset saying she missed me, bla bla bla. We started seeing each other again and it was actually a lot of fun. We hiked, rafted, paddle boarded, went out, hung out, and had sex. She pushed HARD for a committed relationship only a few weeks in. Then, she freaked out when I looked (yes, just looked) at another girl at the dog park, the whole thing escalated, I called her out for bad behaviour, and she left. That was 3 months ago. I went NC and haven't heard from her since. I assume she wet back to the original boyfriend.

Lesson: Beware of chicks like this. Most are just petrified of being alone and will reach out to many to get a bite. They will cling to the first guy that shows interest. I think most like this are BPD to a degree. Mine had all the classic signs. Beware.

 

[marmel75]

I think I would have seen what she had in mind and see if I could have turned it into an easy lay before turning it down...at the very least I would have told her she is paying for drinks and if she agreed I would have gone.

it's obvious she was interested in someone else more but that doesn't necessarily mean she WASN'T interested in you. If you have 2 women, a 9 and a 7.5, and you have to choose one of them, you are going to choose the 9 most likely, but that doesn't mean you WEREN'T interested in the 7.5...it's just "bad timing" as she said...she likely went out with a guy or had been going out with a guy a few times and they started having sex and then she just figured she was going to give him a chance and see where it went---obviously not that far.

I think you made a mistake and could have probably laid her out without too much effort.

Guys get too worked up about this "If I'm not number 1 then I'm nothing" attitude. In truth, most guys are "#1" on precious few women's lists. In theory that attitude works well, in practice it just costs you lays you would have gotten to protect a fragile ego. A lot of times it has NOTHING to do with you, but guys take it so personally. Stop being so sensitive, be like a chameleon and fill the need she has at that moment and you can fill her mouth later with your c0ck...

I just don't buy a lot of this stuff people blanket speak anymore. And the reason I don't buy it is through experience I have found that often time going against that advice has gotten me the result I wanted far more often than listening to it. If the goal is to get laid, then proceed towards that goal and take advantage of opportunities that come your way. I'm not saying make her your girlfriend, but how is it a "loss of dignity" to go out with some random chick you never met up with? It's not like you were texting her every day 10 times a day begging for her to go out with you. I've had this happen 3 or 4 times and twice I banged the chick on the first date. And my dignity was just fine afterwards. With the other two, one of them we went on two dates and I wasn't feeling her so that was that and the other ended up not being into me...cool. I'll take a 50% lay rate anytime.

Once again I think this falls under the basic advice given without understanding any context...its just like a blanket rule that makes everything either White or Black with nothing in between but a lot of times things are various shades of gray(and not the movie or the book)...that is all well and good when you are just starting out but having these type of blanket rules probably lowers your lay count by half. At some point people need to take the training wheels off and learn how to judge each situation and its context in and of itself and stop having these rigid rules in place that prevent them from growing and learning.

 

[Pajeet Singh]

Smart move nexting her.

I'm 99% sure she just broke up with someone and probably got dumped or in a fight with her boyfriend. She can't stand being alone so she went through her contacts/orbiters looking for a bite. This happened to me a few months back with a girl I saw off and on. After breaking a date 3 months earlier, she called all upset saying she missed me, bla bla bla. We started seeing each other again and it was actually a lot of fun. We hiked, rafted, paddle boarded, went out, hung out, and had sex. She pushed HARD for a committed relationship only a few weeks in. Then, she freaked out when I looked (yes, just looked) at another girl at the dog park, the whole thing escalated, I called her out for bad behaviour, and she left. That was 3 months ago. I went NC and haven't heard from her since. I assume she wet back to the original boyfriend.

Lesson: Beware of chicks like this. Most are just petrified of being alone and will reach out to many to get a bite. They will cling to the first guy that shows interest. I think most like this are BPD to a degree. Mine had all the classic signs. Beware.

Are you guys doing this at 30+ or still young?