Girl at salsa lessons IL? or wth?

[pyros]

Hi.

When I was in highschool (9 years ago) there was this HB6 which was nice but I was not interested at the time. We talked a few times in class but nothing else.

The thing is four weeks ago she joined my salsa lessons to my surprise, so we were both suprised to meet again, we're both now 27, Now she's a damn HB9. She comes to dance with a guy, a real chump that she introduced to me saying his her cousin.

We've talked a bit in class about how is life going etc. Third time we talked I got her number. After a couple of days I sent her a text just to wish her merry christmas, so we texted back and forth for a bit.
I can definetely feel there is some chemistry going on between us, second time we met at salsa class, she grabbed my necklace and said it was very nice. The way she looks at me, the way she laughs at my jokes... etc.


The thing is, I texted her last night to suggest that we should go grab a drink this weekend. She took 6
hours to reply, her reply at 23:00:

'hey handsome Pyros, how are you?? blah blah, to go grab a drink, in which way?'

I replied this morning and here's the combo:

me: I mean that if you're single, we should go grab a drink.
her: listen, Im single now but I just came out of a very serious relationship two months ago and Im a mess now, so I dont want anything at the moment. I just want to have fun and learn and dance salsa. Just come more often to X club so we can dance there
me: Alright but , what do I do now with all our wedding arrangements??
her: hahaha, just delay them for a bit. I guess Ill be fine in two months lol
me: good, Im checking out hotels now.
her: ok
me: I also broke up with my ex two months ago.
her: we were living together, and it also happened in October, so I feel kind of ****ed now.
me: I also lived with my ex but you know life goes on. We'll Im gonna have breakfast somewhere in the center, have fun.
her: alright, have fun too :*



So what do you think?
she suggested that I go to X club where she goes to dance, so we can dance together but I do not want to be her 'dance partner' neither go to that club just because she's there. On the other hand, I could do this to increase the attraction etc

What would you do?
Thanks.

 

[foreverAFC]

sounds like you may be headed towards the friendzone already

 

[pyros]

anybody else?

 

[Demonpenz]

Sounds like you are in the friendzone. Work out more and spin plates.

 

[ARrocket]

Yeah you're fvcked, she's not into you.

You suggested you go grab a drink this weekend. How did you phrase it? How far before the weekend did you suggest it? I'm not a big fan of setting dates up too far in advance, and I'm also not a big fan of having a first date on a Friday or Saturday night - try for Tuesday or something next time.

Second, you shouldn't try the whole 'if you're single' route, because it makes her think about a relationship. The fact that she asked 'in what way' already kinda clued you in to the fact she's not interested, but I would have said something like 'so you can absorb some of my awesome vibe and get to know each other, of course'

Or something like that.

Third, you tried to save face with that wedding comment. It wasn't so bad, but then once she responded you should have left it at that. Then, you started talking about your past relatinoship too...what were you trying to do, convince her that she should just get over it and go out with you? The fact is, it's not the past relationship that's holding her back, she just doesn't wanna go out with you.

Not much you could have done from the start, but just forget about her for now. You never know, if you show you're a fun, high value guy and you can get some attention from the other ladies in class, she may come calling in a few weeks/months, whatever. But don't hold your breath.

 

[pyros]

Hi.

I said that comment about being single because I want to know if she's available with no bf or anything around, so this clarifies things.

I talked about my ex because she talked first about her ex, and this way I show her 'pre-selection' (I had another girl that was my gf for some years).
Besides, on some other occasions I've met a girl in similar circumstances (broke up with her bf some months ago) and if you talked about your ex for a bit this way you have some empathy going on between you two (see? same thing happened to me).

Anyway, I get that she's not that interested at the moment, but as I said I feel she has some attraction for me, but whatever...if she does not want to go out with me, fine.
I suggested on Friday to go for a drink on Saturday or Sunday.

I wonder if she finds tomorrow a guy she likes 'more' than me, would she just refuse to get to know him also?
or would she definetely go out with him?
you follow me?
Could it be true that she does not want to meet anybody at the moment?

 

[Purefilth]

Nope shell meet with the right guy.

Be her salsa dance partner, you should build some sexual tension with the dancing, see if she views you differently.

 

[FairShake]

She is not into you right now. I don't care if she laughs at your jokes, touches your chain, and looks at you just so. If she doesn't want to hang out with you she's not into you.

I would still be her dance partner. Maybe you can ramp up the sexual attention with alcohol and kino. Maybe there are other cute girls at the club, friends of hers or women who may want to know who the guy dancing with the HB9 is.

 

[Fly By Night]

Nope shell meet with the right guy.

Be her salsa dance partner, you should build some sexual tension with the dancing, see if she views you differently.

I second this. She gave you a place to meet up with her, is this not the counter offer we all look for when a girl turns down our idea?

I just want to have fun and learn and dance salsa. Just come more often to X club so we can dance there

She wants to "have fun" with YOU and you are worried about other guys getting with her? We should really throw out this insecure fear of a woman effing 20,000 guys every minute she goes out of eyesight. WHO CARES!? It's not like she is exclusive to you.

so I dont want anything at the moment.

You asked her if she was single, so she got the vibe that you are trying to start a relationship this early. Misunderstood vibes is common when texting, so she made sure to clear things up by telling you she didn't want a relationship before she even knows who she's dealing with.

So just dance with her and see how far it goes. Don't be insecure.

 

[VladPatton]

Do your dance thing with her, grab her, create some sexual tension, say bye after class and be indifferent. Act like you rub up against hot chicks with tight bods all day long, and she is nothing special. See where that takes you, but for now, she seems not interested, so just carry on.

 

[pyros]

Hi.

is it lame if I add her to FB?

 

[pyros]

Hello.

I did not send her a FB friend request, but some days later she added me.

I've met her two more times at salsa lessons. She keeps laughing at my jokes, she touches me a lot (and I reciprocate) and I see she looks at me several times during the class, and I do feel a good amount of attraction going on.

She suggested again that I should go with her an some common friends to dance at a salsa club.
I was thinking of either go one night to X club to dance with her etc and kiss her...orr...just give her a little peck on the lips at the end or during our salsa class.
I checked her FB and it is true that she ended her relationship two months ago.

What do you think?

 

[FastMen]

What would you do?
Thanks.

Let me tell you brother, if she already know you, and danced with you, and YOU almost told her you like her and want to go out indirectly, She KNOWS you like her, and she dont want anything right now but because she is not YET attracted to you at all or she never will be...
So if i were you i would keep on goin there and meet other girls, forget about her, if she wants you she will let you know.:box: