Gipper Field Report: Accidental Mall Pickup

[Gipper]

Evening Gentlemen!

I thought I would enter my latest field report of my new "era" so to speak. I recently won a $100 gift card at a company picnic for our local mall, so I went out to update and add to my wardrobe. After shopping for a while, a girl working one of the kiosks gets my attention.

"Excuse me sir, would you like to be amazed?"

Now, I ordinarily hate this kind of thing, but the girl was exceptionally cute, and I was in a great mood.

Gipper:" Will you be the one doing the amazing?"

Cute Girl: "Yes, I will."

Gipper: "Well, in that case, I'm in!"

Cute Girl: Giggle "Let me see your hand."

I offer her my hand. She's gorgeous, between 19 and 21.

Cute Girl: "OK, I'm going to buff your nail..."

Gipper: "Hold on, hold on. Buff my nail? "

Cute Girl: "You will definitely be impressed."

Gipper: " I'd better be. If the guys I work with find out about this, I'll be laughed at mercilessly."

Cute Girl: Giggle, tee hee...

So she proceeds to buff my thumbnail with this rectangular...buffer, I guess.
I tried to make my move. I needed the practice.

Gipper: " I think I detect an accent with you." This was true, but it seemed like an easy opening.

Cute Girl: "You do." BIG SMILE.

Gipper: "Well, where are you from?"

Cute Girl: "Israel!"

I think for a moment. Nothing happens. I vapor-lock for a couple of seconds...I know nothing about Israel.

Gipper: "Really? That's facinating, I've always wanted to visit Israel. It's really a beautiful country." All true, but I'm stalling for time until I can say something witty.

Cute Isareli Girl: " I know, I miss it."

Gipper: "You know, my brother-in-law is from Israel." Her eyes grew large and puppy-like.

Except there was a problem. It was a total lie. I made it up; my oxygen-starved brain betrayed me.

Cute Israeli Girl: "Really? What's his name?"

Gipper: "Uh, 'John Smith'."

She looked puzzled. I was about to pay for my error.

Cute Israeli Girl: "Hmmm. That's not an Israeli name."

Sweat started forming on my brow. At least it felt like it. I had to recover quickly, but how?

Gipper: " Well, I think he moved here when he was very young, and he must've changed his name...or something."

She broke out in a huge grin and started laughing and reached out and touched my arm. Kino! I had a chance to salvage this!

Gipper: "You know what, he hasn't been my brother-in-law very long,and to be honest, I don't like him very much." I couldn't help it, I started laughing too. The girl on the other side of the kiosk leaned around the corner to see what the commotion was.

We chatted some more about living in Chattanooga and found out she's going back to Israel at the end of the year.

Gipper: "So I'd better act fast. huh?"

Cute Israeli Girl: "Act fast? Why?"

Gipper: " If I'm going to ask you out, silly."

She laughed again, and said, yes, so I got the digits and left before I made a bigger fool of myself.

Moral of the Story: Keep it upbeat and funny, and you can salvage a crash-and-burn.

"Non-Israeli Gipper"

 

[Sapiens]

Wow!!

Awesome, I like your work!

-Sapiens

 

[hithard]

Well done gipper!!!! Great work

 

[Gipper]

Thanks guys, but things could have gone south in a hurry. Fortunately, she is a very cool chick with a sense of humor. After she busted me on my feeble lie, we had a nice 10 minute or so conversation (left out for clarity's sake) and I developed some real rapport with her.

I've recently been studying some of the stuff from Juggler (as mentioned in Strauss' 'The Game') and have been working on my "conversational jujitsu", as he call it. Very interesting stuff.

And trust me, if I can do it, anyone on this board can!

Gipper

 

[racerX]

let us know how the date went...this chick is 1/2 your age. Awesome!

 

[wheelin&dealin]

That's funny man! I lie about alot of stuff when I talk to chicks.. but I've never told them I have a brother-in-law from Israel. lol.

I normally lie to women about upcoming events to make getting their number easier. I'll say "I'm going to a party this weekend. Why don't you write down your number and I'll give you a call and tell you the details?" Then I'll call them up and ask them out.

 

[Gipper]

Yeah, it was pretty lame as far as lies go, but I felt like I had to say something or lose the moment.

And the fact that she may be half my age never entered the equation. If you focus on how young (or hot) the chick is, you lose any focus or confidence you may have.

I'm supposed to meet her Sunday. I'll keep everyone posted.

Gipper

 

[Tazman]

LOL, I had a similar experience at a kiosk in a mall. I could see this really cute girl pacing a little near this kiosk and I saw her glance at me. When I looked over at her she looked away and continued pacing. As I passed by she asked if I'd like to see what she had (same thing, she was cute so I accepted). She asked if she could see my hands and offered to buff my nail. At first I was like "well.....that seems a little too feminine for me". By that time she already started so I gave in.

I thought about practicing on her but I hesitated and she pretty much asked me questions. I found it odd that I was a little uncomfortable talking to her because she was standing so close to me. I was actually leaning back slightly because of it. Of course she tried to sell me stuff and I said I was hard because I was refusing everything. I decided I had enough and told her I would come back, but she said "I'm not going to be here tomorrow" so I said "is the kiosk going to be here?" She replied "yes" and I said "good!" (little neg for fun). She said "oh, you're bad" I patted her arm and said with a smile "no thanks" and left.

Never even tried to ask her out but it was a funny experience.