GF's Sexual Past...Might Break Up With Her

exhausted

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At what number is the cut-off generally for guys to consider wife material?
Hmm.. good question.. if she has more than 5 no thanks..

Sorry but we are all entitled to our own preference

I dont know why.men these days are good with 10 or more... no thanks

However depends on age and life circumstance
 

Von

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When à woman gives you à count number... do times 3

When à man gives you à count number, do... divide by 3

Her count is no important unless she's promiscious girl (sex all the time girl)

Likely, you wont be able to handle her answer cause it will smash your expectations.

Just make sûre the count is not +1 during your LTR
 

Atom Smasher

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This has always been a huge stumbling block for me.I HATE their sexual pasts because I believe a woman forever carries with her the essence of the men she has slept with, and each one depletes and degenerates her mentally and physically. When you get good at this, you can tell a mid to high-mileage woman from her face.

Quite some time ago I decided it was self-defeating to ask. Instead I decided to look at it philosophically and think that this is a new day, the only day we have, and that every day generates more distance from her past activities. By creating new experiences and as time goes on, those exes will fade if you're a man who has his act together.

I feel very fortunate that late in life I met a fantastic woman who was only ever intimate with her husband who died over 10 years ago. That I can deal with. You'd have to know her to know how I can tell this is absolutely true.

I think it is only natural for a man to be disgusted by a woman's sexual past. The woman is the receiver, the man the giver. Too often, men get blamed for feeling troubled about her past. One to three past involvements can be philosophized away, but for me, when we get into the 4+ area, she carries damage from those experiences. Women were not made to have multiple partners. They never get rid of the men they allow in, and it is a damaging residue that remains, and that is why men instinctively feel disgust about it. Most of us can't articulate it as I just did, but I'm convinced that this is what men instinctively know.
 

exhausted

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This has always been a huge stumbling block for me.I HATE their sexual pasts because I believe a woman forever carries with her the essence of the men she has slept with, and each one depletes and degenerates her mentally and physically. When you get good at this, you can tell a mid to high-mileage woman from her face.

Quite some time ago I decided it was self-defeating to ask. Instead I decided to look at it philosophically and think that this is a new day, the only day we have, and that every day generates more distance from her past activities. By creating new experiences and as time goes on, those exes will fade if you're a man who has his act together.

I feel very fortunate that late in life I met a fantastic woman who was only ever intimate with her husband who died over 10 years ago. That I can deal with. You'd have to know her to know how I can tell this is absolutely true.

I think it is only natural for a man to be disgusted by a woman's sexual past. The woman is the receiver, the man the giver. Too often, men get blamed for feeling troubled about her past. One to three past involvements can be philosophized away, but for me, when we get into the 4+ area, she carries damage from those experiences. Women were not made to have multiple partners. They never get rid of the men they allow in, and it is a damaging residue that remains, and that is why men instinctively feel disgust about it. Most of us can't articulate it as I just did, but I'm convinced that this is what men instinctively know.
That makes a lot of sense.
 

breadd80

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Dude, you're missing the forest for the trees. A woman's past is just another metric you use to evaluate her, just like tattoos, family background, father, etc etc etc. The more checked boxes, the better, but the point is that these are indicators, they are not the good itself.

Either she's good enough for you or she isn't. Just admit to yourself that the real problem with this right now is your ego getting beat to the moon and back thinking about 10 (most likely 2-3x) c0cks having been inside her. If you wanna drop her because your ego can't handle it, fine, but don't say no one questioned your wisdom.
 

exhausted

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Dude, you're missing the forest for the trees. A woman's past is just another metric you use to evaluate her, just like tattoos, family background, father, etc etc etc. The more checked boxes, the better, but the point is that these are indicators, they are not the good itself.

Either she's good enough for you or she isn't. Just admit to yourself that the real problem with this right now is your ego getting beat to the moon and back thinking about 10 (most likely 2-3x) c0cks having been inside her. If you wanna drop her because your ego can't handle it, fine, but don't say no one questioned your wisdom.
Ego?
Character is revealed thro ones behavior. A woman who has banged lots of men is of poor character..
nothing wrong with having high standards
 

Dynamited

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I'm in the same shoes as you OP. I'm dating this girl (not exclusive) who is 30 and has been with 10 guys as well.

To me, that's more than I can accept. I've been with older attractive women who has much less than that. If a woman needs to go through that many men, something about her ain't right.

Furthermore, studies have shown that the higher the count she has, the harder it is to bond with her future partner. Women just aren't wired like us.

And to makes things more challenging, she is also a divorcee but with no kids.

Someone here mentioned that it should be viewed in totality with the rest of her personality. I do agree to an extent, but this has always been the major deal breaker one for me.

Don't let anyone here tell you what you should or should not be able to accept. Ultimately, choosing a partner is one of the biggest decision you can make.

A good quality woman can enrich your life whilst a flawed one can send you down the road to ruin.

Still your mind and do what your gut tells you. It has all the info it needs to make a sound decision.
 
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Von

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If you can't handle her body count... don't ask

What if she asked your count ?

There is a limit to your ego protection.... If she got many partners but is perfect... go ahead... maybe you are the one she is waiting for.

Every body had a life before meeting their partner. What count is the life WITH the parther....

Check the Red Flags, that's all the matter... (Personnally, a girl with more than 6 partners a year that might be a red flag)

Ex: If she is 30 but 10 partners.... Started Sech at 16..... that's 1.5 partner A YEAR... It,s normal she date?
 

sosousage

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I dont know how old are you OP but if you were twenty then your female peers could already have 10 partners. Girls start very soon now :) boys too
 

purple haze

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This has always been a huge stumbling block for me.I HATE their sexual pasts because I believe a woman forever carries with her the essence of the men she has slept with, and each one depletes and degenerates her mentally and physically. When you get good at this, you can tell a mid to high-mileage woman from her face.

Quite some time ago I decided it was self-defeating to ask. Instead I decided to look at it philosophically and think that this is a new day, the only day we have, and that every day generates more distance from her past activities. By creating new experiences and as time goes on, those exes will fade if you're a man who has his act together.

I feel very fortunate that late in life I met a fantastic woman who was only ever intimate with her husband who died over 10 years ago. That I can deal with. You'd have to know her to know how I can tell this is absolutely true.

I think it is only natural for a man to be disgusted by a woman's sexual past. The woman is the receiver, the man the giver. Too often, men get blamed for feeling troubled about her past. One to three past involvements can be philosophized away, but for me, when we get into the 4+ area, she carries damage from those experiences. Women were not made to have multiple partners. They never get rid of the men they allow in, and it is a damaging residue that remains, and that is why men instinctively feel disgust about it. Most of us can't articulate it as I just did, but I'm convinced that this is what men instinctively know.
What do you look for in the face that are tell tale signs? I'd like to get better at this.
 

Atom Smasher

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It's very difficult to describe, but I can tell you that the face gets old and tired looking, and more masculine in features. An old-ish, haggard, worn-out look. The vibrancy of youth goes missing. The jaw and chin become more prominent, and the lips grow thicker and often wider. They actually start developing a slight masculine feature set.

It's one thing to detect this in a women who is older and over the edge, but quite another to detect it in a younger woman who is on her way. It's a matter of intuition that a man develops. It's far too easy to imagine you're seeing this when you're young, so just take it as a subtle indicator and not a hard and fast rule. When you get older it becomes very easy to see.

Google a certain female counselor to Trump. Blond. Perfect illustration.
 

resilient

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It's very difficult to describe, but I can tell you that the face gets old and tired looking, and more masculine in features. An old-ish, haggard, worn-out look. The vibrancy of youth goes missing. The jaw and chin become more prominent, and the lips grow thicker and often wider. They actually start developing a slight masculine feature set.
Woe... I can totally think of this 32-year-old female friend of a friend. She's a self-employed hairdresser. Dresses very well, makeup and hair are always nice every time I see her, yet there's something about her face that looks haggard. She was lamenting about how a LDR didn't work out with a really nice charming guy.

Great hat tip, @Atom Smasher. I'll keep this in the back of my mind of a sign to look out for.
 

Who Dares Win

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Personally Im done fighting with such things, the only thing I came up to save my mental health is simply not investing emotionally, psychologically or economically in women.

She can have a 10+ count this way but at least I dont feel like a cuck, being an other customer is better than being the moron who buys an used car at full price.

Am I insecure? no I simply dont like used stuff especially when its supposed to be an investment that gets paid as new and functional.

When I go grocery shopping I buy goods in the bottom of the crate, not those on the surface that have been touched from everyone.
 

resilient

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Personally Im done fighting with such things, the only thing I came up to save my mental health is simply not investing emotionally, psychologically or economically in women.
Well said... I like your approach to self-respect...
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

guru1000

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It's very difficult to describe, but I can tell you that the face gets old and tired looking, and more masculine in features. An old-ish, haggard, worn-out look. The vibrancy of youth goes missing. The jaw and chin become more prominent, and the lips grow thicker and often wider. They actually start developing a slight masculine feature set.

It's one thing to detect this in a women who is older and over the edge, but quite another to detect it in a younger woman who is on her way. It's a matter of intuition that a man develops. It's far too easy to imagine you're seeing this when you're young, so just take it as a subtle indicator and not a hard and fast rule. When you get older it becomes very easy to see.

Google a certain female counselor to Trump. Blond. Perfect illustration.
Many hot women over 25 in metropolitan areas get fillers, Botox, skin-tightening treatments. Accordingly, face alone tells little these days.

Instead, pay attention to the intimate details of her past, behavioral psychology and mannerisms, thinking, promiscuity, nuances in her sexuality and language. Extrapolation, gentlemen.
 

Three

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Guys, I haven't been around here in a long time, but I happened to come by thinking about this very same issue. It took me a couple days to remember my password, so here I am again. I stopped coming around because I got into a relationship and just got too busy for the distraction after a while. Plus I was trying to stop messing around with girls on the side and you guys made it tough!

I've been with this girl for five years now and recently found out some things about her past that upset me, too. There is definitely a difference between suspecting things and knowing details.

My advice on the numbers: don't ask. Don't even bring it up. Too much talk about this shit destroys relationships and, most importantly, disturbs your inner peace and sense of balance.

The caveat is this: Do whatever you want if you don't plan on having a relationship other than banging it out or pump and dump. But, my relationship started with a somewhat random hookup and yours might, too...

If you want a future, you don't want to have pictures in your head of every dick that's been inside your precious piece of pretty pink.

Remember, every person's life is different. If we start off with a rigid list of requirements that no one can live up to, we'll never be happy. That said, every one of us should have some requirements that we absolutely do not compromise on.

So, I've been going through this history thing in my head for the last few weeks. It started with a couple of accidental revelations that really shook me up, but in the end, I had to look at the whole picture. I'm with this girl, we have been through so much shit in these past years with lost jobs, money, drinking, my father dying, trouble with kids and exes. We've come through all of it closer than ever. Sex is and always was porn quality and frequent enough that most guys my age would be shocked.

I've seen her change herself for the better over the last few years through sheer willpower and it blows me away what she's overcome. During this time I've made myself better, too.

My situation may not be the same as everyone else's, but here's the bottom line:

Happiness in life is so rare and so fleeting, that you have to put all these things on the sides of a scale and see what's most important. For me, I have to let it go and move forward.
 
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