GF's Sexual Past...Might Break Up With Her

[MG7592]

She's 30 and has been with 10 other guys. What do you guys think? Too high? I was thinking I was number 6-7 based off the things she told me and by saying she "hasn't had very many partners." So when I found out 10 I was in complete shock. Now I know you're all saying double or triple the number but I really believe her. I originally guessed I was her 8th (purposely over guessed what I actually thought) and she could have stopped me there and said yeah 8, but she said no 10 others. It wasn't until the 5th time we hung out we finally had sex so she's not easy. She had 5 guys from 17-26, 5 more guys 26-30.

BUT, she is one of the nicest and most thoughtful girls I've ever met. She's very attractive, gets tons of attention, makes six figures, doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, no partying, does have 3 tattooos unfortunately, eats healthy, works out, great body, very smart, athletic, very close with her family, and she claims every guy she ever had sex with, she had gone on many dates with, had a connection to, cared about. 3 of the 10 were boyfriends, one of them was kinda almost a boyfriend, she said she doesn't consider it cause it wasnt quite serious enough, and the 6 others were guys she went on dates with, but it just happened to not work out in the end.

The girl is straight obsessed with me tho too. She pursued me, I ignored her the first 3 times cause I was talking to other girls. She was persistent, she said she can't describe the feeling I give her, her mom came up to me and told me she hasn't seen her this happy in years, she'll do anything for me, the sex is great, it just felt right from the beginning. Just immediate strong sexual chemistry and compatibility that just felt so right. And she's told me sex with me is just completely mind blowing and she brags to her friends about it and me as a whole.

So despite all that, I'm still considering breaking up with her for having 10 previous partners. Which I realize actually isn't bad for a hot 30 year old, since I know plenty of girls 18-24 year old girls with 8-20 partners. But it still bothers the hell out of me. I've heard stuff to that a girls ability to bond with another guy diminishes after having so many partners


What do ya'll think? Gf material or no

 

[fastlife]

I think stressing over a number is kind of pointless. Context IMO matters way more--a girl can be emotionally fvcked up before she even gets her cherry popped; she might be emotionally fvcked up after one guy. I'd much rather have a gf who'd been with 10 partners & had a healthy sense of self esteem & her own sexuality than a girl with lower partner counts who is plagued by guilt or sexually standoffish (for example--obviously there's all kinds of combinations of personality types & attributes).

That said, 10 is ridiculously low for 30 in the US. I expect 10-15 by 20 or so if she's hot. How old are you btw? I'd be more concerned about her age than her partner count.

 

[MG7592]

I think stressing over a number is kind of pointless. Context IMO matters way more--a girl can be emotionally fvcked up before she even gets her cherry popped; she might be emotionally fvcked up after one guy. I'd much rather have a gf who'd been with 10 partners & had a healthy sense of self esteem & her own sexuality than a girl with lower partner counts who is plagued by guilt or sexually standoffish (for example--obviously there's all kinds of combinations of personality types & attributes).

That said, 10 is ridiculously low for 30 in the US. I expect 10-15 by 20 or so if she's hot. How old are you btw? I'd be more concerned about her age than her partner count.

Exactly. Context is big. And the context of her number is good. 3 boyfriends, almost kinda 4, then 6 guys she went on dates with, built a connection with, was exclusive with, but it just didn't work out. The 6 that "didn't work out" bugs me. The relationships don't, since they were relationships. I'm 25, and I know this is very hypocritical, but I've been with about 40+ women. She's 30 and her number is 10. She knows my number and doesn't care at all. I've been with a 19 yeR old how had 7 guys by 17 and it didn't bother me one but. For some reason hers does thov

 

[BetterCallSaul]

You say you've been with 40+ women, yet her lower number bothers you? Something doesn't add up here.

 

[MG7592]

You say you've been with 40+ women, yet her lower number bothers you? Something doesn't add up here.

That is unrelated. This isn't about me. This about her sexual past. Yes despite my number it bothers me. Higher count means less value in my eyes

 

[BetterCallSaul]

That is unrelated. This isn't about me. This about her sexual past. Yes despite my number it bothers me. Higher count means less value in my eyes

Personally I think it is about you, but whatever.

 

[AJ84]

She's 30 and has been with 10 other guys. What do you guys think? Too high? I was thinking I was number 6-7 based off the things she told me and by saying she "hasn't had very many partners." So when I found out 10 I was in complete shock. Now I know you're all saying double or triple the number but I really believe her. I originally guessed I was her 8th (purposely over guessed what I actually thought) and she could have stopped me there and said yeah 8, but she said no 10 others. It wasn't until the 5th time we hung out we finally had sex so she's not easy. She had 5 guys from 17-26, 5 more guys 26-30.

BUT, she is one of the nicest and most thoughtful girls I've ever met. She's very attractive, gets tons of attention, makes six figures, doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, no partying, does have 3 tattooos unfortunately, eats healthy, works out, great body, very smart, athletic, very close with her family, and she claims every guy she ever had sex with, she had gone on many dates with, had a connection to, cared about. 3 of the 10 were boyfriends, one of them was kinda almost a boyfriend, she said she doesn't consider it cause it wasnt quite serious enough, and the 6 others were guys she went on dates with, but it just happened to not work out in the end.

The girl is straight obsessed with me tho too. She pursued me, I ignored her the first 3 times cause I was talking to other girls. She was persistent, she said she can't describe the feeling I give her, her mom came up to me and told me she hasn't seen her this happy in years, she'll do anything for me, the sex is great, it just felt right from the beginning. Just immediate strong sexual chemistry and compatibility that just felt so right. And she's told me sex with me is just completely mind blowing and she brags to her friends about it and me as a whole.

So despite all that, I'm still considering breaking up with her for having 10 previous partners. Which I realize actually isn't bad for a hot 30 year old, since I know plenty of girls 18-24 year old girls with 8-20 partners. But it still bothers the hell out of me. I've heard stuff to that a girls ability to bond with another guy diminishes after having so many partners


What do ya'll think? Gf material or no

"She'll do anything, the sex is great, it just felt right from the beginning." Do you have this experience with every girl you date?
If yes, then go ahead and dump her over the 3 extra guys she's slept with that exceed your weird tally of what's considered gf material.
If no, then stop overthinking, put down the red pill literature, ignore toxic 20 step strategies for dating, act like a human being, and enjoy her, the good feelings and the good sex.

 

[MG7592]

It's probably 20. She's not as obsessed with you as you think, but she needs to get married fast.

You don't even know her you dumbfuk.

 

[MG7592]

"She'll do anything, the sex is great, it just felt right from the beginning." Do you have this experience with every girl you date?
If yes, then go ahead and dump her over the 3 extra guys she's slept with that exceed your weird tally of what's considered gf material.
If no, then stop overthinking, put down the red pill literature, ignore toxic 20 step strategies for dating, act like a human being, and enjoy her, the good feelings and the good sex.

No I don't. Out all the women I've been with I can count on one hand the amount of women where it just felt right immediately from start and felt a strong sexual connection. Good point though.

So for more detail, she was in a long on and off relationship from 17-26. 9years. When they were on their "off" periods she'd meet other guys occasionally to try to move on, and when it didn't workout, she went back to her boyfriend. And I didn't know about that. I had assumed she had been with that same, one dude for 9 years straight. If she told me they were off and on, I would have guessed her number to be like 12-15 not 10. So yeah, not bad. I just can't get over how much it bugs me. Bothering me so much it's causing me to be so cold and distantly towards her lately.

 

[Pandora]

Dude it is probably slightly higher than she said ( don't be naive). Women have EVERY incentive to lie about their number. She is not even counting the BJ's and handjobs. But even if it is closer to 20 that is still very low for a 30 year old American woman. You should be relieved. Many of these attractive girls have numbers of 35 or more men by the time they hit 30 years old. This is not an exaggeration. 10 to 15 guys by 30 is not much for the average western girl. You found a decent one….relatively speaking.

 

[Von]

You need help

 

[btownbuck2012]

You don't even know her you dumbfuk.

One thing I don't understand about guys like you is that you come on here seeking advice and then become extremely hostile when you get an answer you don't like. What is up with that?

 

[btownbuck2012]

she was in a long on and off relationship from 17-26. 9years.

You'll never be able to compete with this guy or generate the feelings that he did and still does instill in her. http://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/high-score-theory.229343/

 

[MG7592]

You'll never be able to compete with this guy or generate the feelings that he did and still does instill in her. http://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/high-score-theory.229343/

That was one of my thoughts as well...

 

[MG7592]

Dude it is probably slightly higher than she said ( don't be naive). Women have EVERY incentive to lie about their number. She is not even counting the BJ's and handjobs. But even if it is closer to 20 that is still very low for a 30 year old American woman. You should be relieved. Many of these attractive girls have numbers of 35 or more men by the time they hit 30 years old. This is not an exaggeration. 10 to 15 guys by 30 is not much for the average western girl. You found a decent one….relatively speaking.

I really don't think she's lying. Cause I originally guessed 8, and she could have stopped me there and said yes it's 8, but then she told me it's 10. So there's a good reason to believe her.

 

[Billtx49]

Refocus your thought pattern towards looking for some type of loyalty/commitment/respect from her.
We all have a past, some of us more, or less than others.
i.e., look at her actual value as a person, and remember there is no guarantee with life.…

 

[MG7592]

Refocus your thought pattern towards looking for some type of loyalty/commitment/respect from her.
We all have a past, some of us more, or less than others.
i.e., look at her actual value as a person, and remember there is no guarantee with life.…

She's an amazing person. That's the thing. Like I mentioned, incredibly nice and thoughtful, athletic, attractive, one of the best set of eyes I've ever seen on a girl, nice body, smart, makes over $100k, amazing personality, the simplest things satisfy her, takes nothing for granted, always buying me small things to surprise me, massages whenever I want, cooks for me, very close with her family, my family really likes her, I like her family, doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, eats very healthy, workouts regularly, sometimes twice a day, doesn't party, never even been a partier or big drinker, seems to have good morals and standards since she doesn't do one night stands and says she can't do casual sex. It wasn't till the 5th time we hung out that we had sex, so that's why I believe her number of 10. Even tho she pursued me consistently for months and I turned her down cause I was talking to other girls, she didn't give up, eventually I gave her a shot. So she still made me wait 5 dates despite her chasing me down. I know two guys that are attractive, nice bodies, make more money than me, (although not nicer bodies or more attractive, I'm a signed model with an agency and a bodybuilder) that went after her and she flaked on both of them. So her standards are there. She's picky. I feel like I just answered my own question when it comes to keeping her or not. It's really strange how much her number bothers me. It's never been like this with any other girl ever.
And I can't expect perfection. There's going to have to be some things I'm going to have to put up with they I may not like so much but a whole lot I do like.

 

[AJ84]

No I don't. Out all the women I've been with I can count on one hand the amount of women where it just felt right immediately from start and felt a strong sexual connection. Good point though.

So for more detail, she was in a long on and off relationship from 17-26. 9years. When they were on their "off" periods she'd meet other guys occasionally to try to move on, and when it didn't workout, she went back to her boyfriend. And I didn't know about that. I had assumed she had been with that same, one dude for 9 years straight. If she told me they were off and on, I would have guessed her number to be like 12-15 not 10. So yeah, not bad. I just can't get over how much it bugs me. Bothering me so much it's causing me to be so cold and distantly towards her lately.

If it bothers you that much that a 30 old woman slept with 10 guys which, btw, is lower than many women that age, then you need to look inward at your own stuff to see where that's coming from and really, really try to deal with it so you don't become you're own worst enemy and mess up what could be a good thing for you.

There are many things to consider re what you think is valuable in a woman - her character, kindness, maturity, looks, how she makes you feel, her family and friends, etc etc. A woman could have a low number of sexual partners and be a witch with a capital B.

 

[Billtx49]

but a whole lot I do like.

Yes, you answered you own question. Take your best shot.

 

[AJ84]

She's an amazing person. That's the thing. Like I mentioned, incredibly nice and thoughtful, athletic, attractive, one of the best set of eyes I've ever seen on a girl, nice body, smart, makes over $100k, amazing personality, the simplest things satisfy her, takes nothing for granted, always buying me small things to surprise me, massages whenever I want, cooks for me, very close with her family, my family really likes her, I like her family, doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, eats very healthy, workouts regularly, sometimes twice a day, doesn't party, never even been a partier or big drinker, seems to have good morals and standards since she doesn't do one night stands and says she can't do casual sex. It wasn't till the 5th time we hung out that we had sex, so that's why I believe her number of 10. Even tho she pursued me consistently for months and I turned her down cause I was talking to other girls, she didn't give up, eventually I gave her a shot. So she still made me wait 5 dates despite her chasing me down. I know two guys that are attractive, nice bodies, make more money than me, (although not nicer bodies or more attractive, I'm a signed model with an gen to and a bodybuilder) that went after her and she flaked on both of them. So her standards are there. She's picky. I feel like I just answered my own question when it comes to keeping her or not. It's really strange how much her number bothers me. It's never been like this with any other girl ever.
And I can't expect perfection. There's going to have to be some things I'm going to have to put up with they I may not like so much but a whole lot I do like.

She sounds like a rare gem, you got a good one there so yes focusing on the many good things that outweigh your one issue is a good move.