GF upset after I told her she can't move in

backbreaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2002
Messages
11,573
Reaction score
572
Location
monrovia, CA
oh i didnt' know she was 2 1.

if she is 21 one of the requirements for me to MARRY her would be for her to live on her own, for at least 1 year. there is some **** she just needs to realize herself

otherwise you marriage is going to be a failure beucase she is comparing you to sex and the city and not real life.

i would never, ever, ever marry a woman, ****, really i wouldn't date one, that has not lived on their own for some period of time with no help from anyone. not living with a boyfriend i mean hey i lived on my own and i paid my own damn bills.

these people don't know how to shop for groceries, i remember i sent amberto the grocery store with 200 dollars one day, and she came home and had about 20 bags full of ****, yet we still didn't have anything to cook. cookies, pops and **** lol. 200 dollars worth of snacks and bull****. you can tell a person who has lived on their own by looking at their grocery basket.

these are people who think it's cool to go buy a pair of shoes and we will just pay the cable bill next time and don't tell you about it, then get mad at you when you bring it up
 

Kailex

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 3, 2010
Messages
2,072
Reaction score
190
Location
New Jersey
backbreaker said:
oh i didnt' know she was 2 1.

if she is 21 one of the requirements for me to MARRY her would be for her to live on her own, for at least 1 year. there is some **** she just needs to realize herself

otherwise you marriage is going to be a failure beucase she is comparing you to sex and the city and not real life.

i would never, ever, ever marry a woman, ****, really i wouldn't date one, that has not lived on their own for some period of time with no help from anyone. not living with a boyfriend i mean hey i lived on my own and i paid my own damn bills.
up
This is gold.

I think this is a point that should actually be emphasized nowadays.
Only because I've been through it before... same deal, but she was older. She had never lived on her own and then we moved in together (This was years ago, pre-SoSuave). She had no clue how to operate on her own and it was painful.

And it's not just about self-realization, but about building her own life, and acknowledging personal responsibility.

At this point, I'd never let any woman move in with me into a house I bought, but if EVER considered it, she better have lived some time alone by herself.


And to the OP, stand your ground... hit eject if you must, there are plenty of other 21 year olds out there, but you also must understand why she is acting the way she is...
 

backbreaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2002
Messages
11,573
Reaction score
572
Location
monrovia, CA
Kailex said:
This is gold.

I think this is a point that should actually be emphasized nowadays.
Only because I've been through it before... same deal, but she was older. She had never lived on her own and then we moved in together (This was years ago, pre-SoSuave). She had no clue how to operate on her own and it was painful.

And it's not just about self-realization, but about building her own life, and acknowledging personal responsibility.

At this point, I'd never let any woman move in with me into a house I bought, but if EVER considered it, she better have lived some time alone by herself.


And to the OP, stand your ground... hit eject if you must, there are plenty of other 21 year olds out there, but you also must understand why she is acting the way she is...
ISWYDT
 

Desdinova

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2004
Messages
11,639
Reaction score
4,717
Kailex said:
She had never lived on her own and then we moved in together (This was years ago, pre-SoSuave). She had no clue how to operate on her own and it was painful.
My experience was the exact opposite. I've lived with two women, one who never lived on her own before and one who did. The one who never lived on her own was much, much more responsible with the money and was very conscious with her money. It may be due to her parents always having the phone cut off and worrying about hydro and water being shut off.

The other one had lived on her own before and she was a nightmare. She'd come home with a bag full of 5hit: a big stack of DVDs, junk she bought that we didn't need for the house, and I gave her 5hit for spending money on junk that we hadn't discussed buying. And that's the way it continued for the next 8 years. I didn't know it at the time but when she lived on her own, her parents always bailed her out of her financial messes.

I think it has more to do with their upbringing more than anything. If their parents are conscious of money problems, then they're going to be better off at fending for themselves or assisting in their living situation with you. If they have never worried about money, they're going to flush it down the toilet just to watch it swirl round and round.
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,076
Reaction score
8,926
Desdinova said:
My experience was the exact opposite. I've lived with two women, one who never lived on her own before and one who did. The one who never lived on her own was much, much more responsible with the money and was very conscious with her money. It may be due to her parents always having the phone cut off and worrying about hydro and water being shut off.
If this was back in the days of the patriarchy that the manosphere is always pining for, the girl would definitely not have lived on her own. You would have given her father a sheep or two, and she would come fully equipped and trained in all the domestic arts. And she'd probably be 14 years old :eek:
 

Tell her a little about yourself, but not too much. Maintain some mystery. Give her something to think about and wonder about when she's at home.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,076
Reaction score
8,926
Danger said:
And FAR more valuable than the 30 something reformed-sluts looking for someone to take care of them into peak ugliness.
And they probably don't know how to cook a meal or clean a floor.
 

Paintballguy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2004
Messages
963
Reaction score
16
Location
Maryland
As more time goes by, the less I care about her to be honest. I have my hands full with everything going on right now. I think I'm better off being single.

Once I get this house done, I want to have some fun and enjoy the rest of my 20's.
 

Epimanes

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2012
Messages
1,269
Reaction score
614
Age
46
^--- good! Dating is an interview for marriage and she is failing.
 

Paintballguy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2004
Messages
963
Reaction score
16
Location
Maryland
I just broke it off today. I felt like it was the best thing to do. She kept trying to guilt trip me until she realized that wasn't working. Then, she tried to make it an ultimatum type situation between me working on my house and her. That's what I had enough and just told her it would be better to split.

I definitely feel like I'm making the right decision. I didn't see anything happening with her long term. Plus, now I'll definitely be saving some more cash.
 

CostaDeSol

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 10, 2011
Messages
230
Reaction score
7
Paintballguy said:
I just broke it off today. I felt like it was the best thing to do. She kept trying to guilt trip me until she realized that wasn't working. Then, she tried to make it an ultimatum type situation between me working on my house and her. That's what I had enough and just told her it would be better to split.

wow. its as if she kept pushing you to give her money (a free place to live).


other than that, are there any other red flags that would make you think you should stop seeing her?
 

If you want to talk, talk to your friends. If you want a girl to like you, listen to her, ask questions, and act like you are on the edge of your seat.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Paintballguy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2004
Messages
963
Reaction score
16
Location
Maryland
CostaDeSol said:
wow. its as if she kept pushing you to give her money (a free place to live).


other than that, are there any other red flags that would make you think you should stop seeing her?
the main thing i can think of is she always wanted attention which obviously is a red flag. she kind of started reminding me of my ex which was a big sign that i should get out.
 

Paintballguy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2004
Messages
963
Reaction score
16
Location
Maryland
So just a quick update...

I went 100% no contact with her after I broke it off. I haven't heard a peep from her which is great. I'm definitely over her.

I'm actually going out with another chick Tuesday night.
 

Paintballguy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2004
Messages
963
Reaction score
16
Location
Maryland
Mauser96 said:
Good for you! Happy for you buddy.

We should all remember that although feminism leads us to believe that every woman wants to be independent and can and will make it on their own, many women don't believe this (NOR do they want it)

Many women today still desire to have all their needs taken care of and live a life with not a care in the world.....bills paid, no job stresses or worries, no worries about when or where the next meal is coming from.

One of my ex's told me just that several times "In all my past relationships, I never had to worry about anything. My boyfriend took care of me"

THAT (true or not, doesn't matter) was an attempt to guilt me into doing the same, despite the fact that going into the relationship I told her that was not my role, that we both were in our 40's and both HAVE been supporting ourselves,, and that we should continue on that path. SHE AGREED. But time and a sense of entitlement has a way of changing things. We had agreed to buy a house together, 50/50 downpayment, 50/50 on the payments and 50/50 on all food and utilities and taxes. Over time, that morphed into me paying for the Downpayment, me paying the payments , me paying all utilities and taxes and she would make sure I had a hot meal when I got home.

Yeah. Right.

"I guess all my other boyfriends were different. I never had to worry about any of these things, they took care of me"

and I am thinking "Oh yeah? And if this was such a good arrangement for ALL parties, why aren't you still with them"

You did the right thing.
It's crazy man. They want their cake and to eat it too just because they have a pvssy. That **** doesn't fly with me either.
 
Top