Gf’s “boss”

[dk1990S111]

Been dating this girl for about 2 months now. She will be working for this guy that trains horses starting next week. Last night I was at her place and he calls her at about 8, then texts. She tells me she’s gunna go take a shower and call him back real quick. 30-40 min later she comes out of her room and hasn’t taken a shower yet. Tells me a few things they supposedly talked about for business stuff.

She’s told me before how when she talked with a friend in the horse community about working for him, the friend said that he’s single and tried to say my gf should go out with him. She’s not good friends with her, so her not knowing that she’s got a bf isn’t surprising. Anyway, she said “he’s gross and old and has a kid my age”.

So I’ve just been thinking about how to handle this because of that call, the texting, and him bringing her a case of beer. Seems obvious what his intentions are, she’s not dumb so I know she knows as well. Don’t want to say something about it and look weak. But also if I don’t say something it’s just going to get real annoying if I’m driving 20 min to her place just to sit alone and watch a movie while she’s on the phone with this guy that’s obviously interested in her.

Other than this she’s great, does my laundry, cooks, wants to fvck all the time. But I have other options so I’d rather just cut it off if this is just going to continue.

 

[In2theGame]

Been dating this girl for about 2 months now. She will be working for this guy that trains horses starting next week. Last night I was at her place and he calls her at about 8, then texts. She tells me she’s gunna go take a shower and call him back real quick. 30-40 min later she comes out of her room and hasn’t taken a shower yet. Tells me a few things they supposedly talked about for business stuff.

She’s told me before how when she talked with a friend in the horse community about working for him, the friend said that he’s single and tried to say my gf should go out with him. She’s not good friends with her, so her not knowing that she’s got a bf isn’t surprising. Anyway, she said “he’s gross and old and has a kid my age”.

So I’ve just been thinking about how to handle this because of that call, the texting, and him bringing her a case of beer. Seems obvious what his intentions are, she’s not dumb so I know she knows as well. Don’t want to say something about it and look weak. But also if I don’t say something it’s just going to get real annoying if I’m driving 20 min to her place just to sit alone and watch a movie while she’s on the phone with this guy that’s obviously interested in her.

Other than this she’s great, does my laundry, cooks, wants to fvck all the time. But I have other options so I’d rather just cut it off if this is just going to continue.

As I lay in my bed (currently sick as sh!t) reading this on my tablet, I let out a laugh because it amazes me how its the same ol story. From experience and others experiences, that guy is CLEARLY wanting to fvck your girlfriend. In the past I probably would have advised you to tell her to not talk to that fvcking guy or else you are gone however my advice is to cut the gf sh!t now and keep her as a "plate". I can see already where this is headed and it will only cause you emotional stress because you'll be worried about what shes doing when she has to "stay late for work" and itll bother you even more knowing that this guy wants to get in her pants.

Cut it now or else suffer the mental torment. I learned the hard way.

Just to add, if you do say something to her, be ready to put your steel backbone and balls on because she will convince you that "it's nothing like that!" And "I'm not attracted to him ugh". Women say all kinds of sh!t like this but you need to break through that like a wrecking ball through a glass wall. Tell her you know for a FACT that this guy wants to fvck her and you pretty much don't want to deal with any of that garbage drama.

 

[Dingo]

You're her plate.

 

[Mazer]

First, you guys have only been dating two months and you are already heavily invested. Take a step back my friend. Secondly, this woman doesn’t respect you and isn’t afraid to lose you. All the women who wanted something serious with me would cut off or keep it short with their orbiters early on in dating. I would just continue banging her and letting her do all those good things, but wouldn’t go out of my way to do special things for her Silence and distance is your best friend here and for freak sake spin more plates.

 

[In2theGame]

First, you guys have only been dating two months and you are already heavily invested. Take a step back my friend. Secondly, this woman doesn’t respect you and isn’t afraid to lose you. All the women who wanted something serious with me would cut off or keep it short with their orbiters early on in dating. I would just continue banging her and letting her do all those good things, but wouldn’t go out of my way to do special things for her Silence and distance is your best friend here and for freak sake spin more plates.

She may already feel she has him in the bag, depending on how he's been acting towards her. IMO this whole thing has emotional stress written in OP's future

 

[Chi Town]

Most guys in this situation would confront her and either get all in there feelings and **** or try to act "dominant" and tell there girl "stop talking to him, "i don't want you talking to him no more" both of these have it's pros and cons but don't do either.

You must understand, you can't control what someone else does bruh, if you have a son who's running the streets, doing drugs, skipping school ECT you can teach, scream and punish him all you want but guess what? When he leaves the house and your not around he's going to do exactly what he wants.

So confronting her is pointless, especially when all she s going to do is tell you "I'm not into him" "baby why don't you trust me" so don't waste your time.

What you need to do is act like it never even happened, as far as your concerned it never happened. Remember, real men don't get in there feelings and they damn sure don't get insecure(if they do, it's behind closed doors) never show weakness. You should be strong enough mentally and emotionally to continue to live your life and not worry about this sh!t.

I said this in another thread, never be the boyfriend who chases behind his girl 24/7 wondering what she's doing or who she's doing it with. When you have clear evidence of her cheating ECT then you act, until then overlook the petty ****. If you know you can't handle this or you truly just don't trust her, then move on now.

Guys have to understand that this type of **** is something your going to deal with in almost alllll of your relationships with women simple because you never know what she's doing when your not around. Only a fool actually trust there girlfriends, it's just foolish. Of course she can be up to no good but that's the same possibility your going to have to face with women in general.

Hopefully, you been displaying the type of attractive behavior that's needed to maintain relationships(dominance, masculinity, leadership) and as you stated, you have other options so your in good hands in my opinion, it's a win win for you.

Overall, don't worry about it.

 

[Spaz]

You're her plate.

Spot on Dingo.

And yes OP, u r her plate.

Plenty of benefits there, maximise it for the duration and when it ends, which it will, you've profited tremendously.

 

[thadder]

Look at it this way, you get to hit that / sleep with her while this guy is basically making his self WAAAAAAY to available and practically coming off beta as hell to her.

All you do is smirk, say "Heh, how about that" and then plow her. Be coy, play it cool, because it could also be a test of jealousy too.

 

[dk1990S111]

@Chi Town would definitely like your opinion on this.

Just to update things with this chick. Last night she got back from a photography job that went from Saturday morning to Sunday around noon. Tells me about this guy “taking her phone and getting her snap off it by taking a picture of the qr ghost thing”, guy comes back around later to ask if she has a man.

Sitting there with her last night she gets a snap from someone and she says “no idea who that is”. Then doesnt look at the message, obviously wants to look at it later when I’m not around.

Could be that guy that took her phone, either way it doesn’t matter. Have major issues with secrets after what my ex put me through so just not something I can just see what happens on, would rather cut ties.

So I’m thinking about asking if she’s free tonight and telling her if that’s what she wants to do she can have fun but I won’t be around. Have to go there because she has my gun and work shirts lol otherwise I’d just call

 

[Chi Town]

@Chi Town would definitely like your opinion on this.

Just to update things with this chick. Last night she got back from a photography job that went from Saturday morning to Sunday around noon. Tells me about this guy “taking her phone and getting her snap off it by taking a picture of the qr ghost thing”, guy comes back around later to ask if she has a man.

Sitting there with her last night she gets a snap from someone and she says “no idea who that is”. Then doesnt look at the message, obviously wants to look at it later when I’m not around.

Could be that guy that took her phone, either way it doesn’t matter. Have major issues with secrets after what my ex put me through so just not something I can just see what happens on, would rather cut ties.

So I’m thinking about asking if she’s free tonight and telling her if that’s what she wants to do she can have fun but I won’t be around. Have to go there because she has my gun and work shirts lol otherwise I’d just call

I agree, cut ties, she seems very sneaky and up to no good. Based on your thread i can tell something like this will drive you insane, next time you guys are together, tell her you don't trust her and you don't want to be in a relationship with someone where you have to always be on guard.

 

[In2theGame]

@Chi Town
Sitting there with her last night she gets a snap from someone and she says “no idea who that is”. Then doesnt look at the message, obviously wants to look at it later when I’m not around.

She knows what she's doing and Im in favor of you cutting this chick from girlfriend status. You can still fvck her but have no emotional ties involved. She seems like a chick that will hide stuff from you and it's definitely not good for your peace of mind.

 

[Murk]

For once a nice rational thread that will have a beginning, middle and end. Update us on this chat bro.

I couldn’t even plate this girl, you are calling her a GF in the title so some feels are there. You are correct in just writing this off now before it gets messy, she’s dangerous.

 

[HankHill]

Personally, I would just walk away without any explanation unless she begs for it. Silence is golden.

 

[sazc]

Take one foot silently out and let it ride. No use jumping the gun

 

[AttackFormation]

The problem with this advice( not knocking it outright because it is the traditional advice here) is that he needs to take advantage of this lack of respect and loyalty by her to screen her out permanently. The longer he stays in it the longer his male hamster brain will make excuses. She might even reject that guy and choose him(for a while) which is the worst case scenario since she is proven low value.

The power of pvssy to a starving man is strong... everything starts with making sure you are playing the same insurance game they are by keeping multiple options. OP said he has done so, so he should hopefully be fine.

 

[Billtx49]

She tells me she’s gunna go take a shower and call him back real quick. 30-40 min later she comes out of her room and hasn’t taken a shower yet.

She lied to your face, expecting you to believe it, and going behind you back while you’re in close proximity to her…
Is this really the quality level you want in a girl?

 

[old_skoolr]

So I’ve just been thinking about how to handle this because of that call, the texting, and him bringing her a case of beer. Seems obvious what his intentions are, she’s not dumb so I know she knows as well. Don’t want to say something about it and look weak. But also if I don’t say something it’s just going to get real annoying if I’m driving 20 min to her place just to sit alone and watch a movie while she’s on the phone with this guy that’s obviously interested in her.

So call her out on it OP.

Next time she wants you to come over, tell her no and tell her why.

Stop chasing her immediately.

It's 2 months in, this is where you set up your boundaries in the relationship, if she doesn't comply or pulls away, let her go and move on.

 

[dk1990S111]

Update for those that care lol

Monday after work I messaged her that I wanted to come by. She says probably wouldn’t be until later and asks how my day was. I tell her not too great and she asks if everything is ok. I tell her not really at 6:30 and never hear back. At 8 I tell her I guess I’ll see her another night, and about 20 min later she asks if I want to come over.

Funny thing was I was already headed over there. Decided to just go and was just going to walk in get my rifle and shirts and just not worry about what she was doing with whoever.

When I get there she’s all excited to see me but I sit down and tell her what’s been on my mind and all the things she had done that I thought were off. She gets really upset that I would even think that about her, saying how she’s been cheated on and wouldn’t do anything like that. Makes me feel like an a$$ for even accusing her of doing anything sketchy.

Still feel very uneasy though. Tonight I sent her a message at 8 and almost 2 hours later no response. Says she’s active on fb messenger though. Same thing the other night. Sent a text at 8:30 and don’t hear anything back until 11 when I’m already asleep I get a “I miss you babe”.

Huge change from before this new boss moved his horses/business there. Seems suspicious as fvck to me that now this late at night she takes so long to get back to me when she can be on messenger.

Ideas?

 

[Chi Town]

Update for those that care lol

Monday after work I messaged her that I wanted to come by. She says probably wouldn’t be until later and asks how my day was. I tell her not too great and she asks if everything is ok. I tell her not really at 6:30 and never hear back. At 8 I tell her I guess I’ll see her another night, and about 20 min later she asks if I want to come over.

Funny thing was I was already headed over there. Decided to just go and was just going to walk in get my rifle and shirts and just not worry about what she was doing with whoever.

When I get there she’s all excited to see me but I sit down and tell her what’s been on my mind and all the things she had done that I thought were off. She gets really upset that I would even think that about her, saying how she’s been cheated on and wouldn’t do anything like that. Makes me feel like an a$$ for even accusing her of doing anything sketchy.

Still feel very uneasy though. Tonight I sent her a message at 8 and almost 2 hours later no response. Says she’s active on fb messenger though. Same thing the other night. Sent a text at 8:30 and don’t hear anything back until 11 when I’m already asleep I get a “I miss you babe”.

Huge change from before this new boss moved his horses/business there. Seems suspicious as fvck to me that now this late at night she takes so long to get back to me when she can be on messenger.

Ideas?

Lol, your so easily manipulated bruh, I'm not going to waste my time giving advice because your going to do exactly what you want anyway, you broke down and "told her what was on your mind" AKA you showed her you was a insecure *****, then all she had to do was tell you what you wanted to hear and it worked lol, now guess what? She's back to treating you like **** smh.

Tough love bro, but do whatever you want. Good luck

 

[dk1990S111]

Lol, your so easily manipulated bruh, I'm not going to waste my time giving advice because your going to do exactly what you want anyway, you broke down and "told her what was on your mind" AKA you showed her you was a insecure *****, then all she had to do was tell you what you wanted to hear and it worked lol, now guess what? She's back to treating you like **** smh.

Tough love bro, but do whatever you want. Good luck

Not in any rush man lol I’m not sold on what she told me. If I believed all of it I would have just blindly trusted her because like she said, she wouldn’t do anything like that