Man I've got this situation with this girl where everytime I see her she always stops right in her tracks and gets excited. She has this thing where she always says "what's up?" all sweet like but the conversation is always...well....you know....WACK. And I mean it's not intentionally wack but it's just her talking about junk she likes. The thing is man, and I'm not kidding, the girl is 21 years old and will ask insanely useless questions like "Do you watch Blues Clues?", "Do you like peanut butter sandwiches and chocolate chip cookies?", "Did you have a midnight snack last night?" It's just an endless cycle of stupid **** and she absolutely loves it! Everytime I see her she's always with this one guy and their conversations are the same mumbo jumbo she's talked about with me. BUT she is a pretty girl and I believe there's more to her than just thoughts about cookies and sunshine. How should I go about doing this without ending up being "like a brother" to her or the guy that just "understands her so well"? I think this would be a useful skill for any guy out there that doesn't want to talk to a girl about useless information of the like. And before anybody says it...YES the young lady has given me plenty of IOI's as they say.
Getting to know her better
- Thread starter S. Pryor
- Start date
Kailex
Master Don Juan
What's the point of IOI's if you are not acting on them?
And why are you allowing the conversation to stay in that insane range? If you like her, try switching up the conversation with something a lot more "sexual".
The minute she asks if you watch Blue's Clues, you have to step up your game and respond something like: Only while having sex.
If your conversations with her are always like that, you are already residing in the Friend-Zone.
And why are you allowing the conversation to stay in that insane range? If you like her, try switching up the conversation with something a lot more "sexual".
The minute she asks if you watch Blue's Clues, you have to step up your game and respond something like: Only while having sex.
If your conversations with her are always like that, you are already residing in the Friend-Zone.
I'm in the Mood
Master Don Juan
Yeah, sometimes I watch Blues Clues when I'm doing it doggystyle.Kailex said:
Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
I would go more sexual but she's a "good girl" and if I even say "tits" her ****ing head would explode. I remember one time she asked me if she looked sleepy and I said no. What I wanted to say was "you look like you've been having sex all night". I don't know how well that would have gone over but in this game you have to have tact. However, another time I told her she had something on her pants but she quickly figured out it was a tactic to look at her ass. She did end up lifting her backpack to show me her ass a little better so go figure. She does have a nice lil bubble I will say that. And it's not a friend-zone thing with her either cause this has been her MO since I met her. We don't have a title either. We're not strangers but at the same time we're not friends.
Forty0ztoFreedom
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
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Seems like you have an idea stuck in your head that she's a 'sweet' girl and would banish you to Hell for talking icky sexual things. F that . . I made up my mind a long time ago that despite all signals otherwise, I'm going to assume the girl loves/wants sex and you just have to step up.
Igetit!
Moderator
I agree with FortyOztoFreedom.
You thinking that a girl being a "nice girl" means that a guy saying anything sexual to her will turn her off or offend her will land you into the friendzone.
I GUARANTEE it. It'll happen that way because you are going to let YOUR "FALSE" PERCEPTION OF HER cause you to be ASEXUAL around her.
You're going to hide your sexuality/your manliness whenever you're with her out of fear of making her mad or making her want nothing to do with you.
You have a misunderstanding. ALL PEOPLE: whether they're outgoing or shy,introverted or extroverted,male or female,18 or 60,ALL PEOPLE have sexual desire. It may vary to different degrees with one another,but it's there.
If you think her being a "good girl" means she wants nothing to do with sex,you might as well just leave her alone right now.
You want to date this girl,right? Well what do you think the whole point of dating/asking a girl out in the first place is? It's showing a SEXUAL interest in someone. If a girl accepts your date invitation,then that means she's open to the possibility of something sexual between you two.
You're mistaken. Being a "good girl" doesn't mean she doesn't want sex. It just means she doesn't want to be viewed as a "slvt" for wanting sex.
Asking her out on a date is sexual. Saying to a girl,"I WANT to see you" is sexual. Saying,"Are you a good girl or a bad girl?" is sexual.
That's what we mean by being sexual with a girl,not talking about her "tits" or "azz".
If the examples I gave of being sexual are things you're afraid to say to this girl,then you're ALREADY off track.
You want to do this FIRST,but eventually,you have to ask her out.
All that being "sexual" means NOTHING if you don't eventually ask the girl out.
You don't pre-heat an oven for nothing. It's to prepare it for something to come.
Likewise,it's the same with flirting and teasing and being sexual. It's all to prepare her.
If you're afraid to say anything even remotely sexual to her,then you are friendzoned.
If you want to know for certain,then easy,ask her out.
You thinking that a girl being a "nice girl" means that a guy saying anything sexual to her will turn her off or offend her will land you into the friendzone.
I GUARANTEE it. It'll happen that way because you are going to let YOUR "FALSE" PERCEPTION OF HER cause you to be ASEXUAL around her.
You're going to hide your sexuality/your manliness whenever you're with her out of fear of making her mad or making her want nothing to do with you.
You have a misunderstanding. ALL PEOPLE: whether they're outgoing or shy,introverted or extroverted,male or female,18 or 60,ALL PEOPLE have sexual desire. It may vary to different degrees with one another,but it's there.
If you think her being a "good girl" means she wants nothing to do with sex,you might as well just leave her alone right now.
You want to date this girl,right? Well what do you think the whole point of dating/asking a girl out in the first place is? It's showing a SEXUAL interest in someone. If a girl accepts your date invitation,then that means she's open to the possibility of something sexual between you two.
You're mistaken. Being a "good girl" doesn't mean she doesn't want sex. It just means she doesn't want to be viewed as a "slvt" for wanting sex.
Being "sexual" doesn't mean being VULGAR or OBSCENE. You could simply tell her you like the way she looks in something. That's sexual. It's something you wouldn't say to a guy.S. Pryor said:
Asking her out on a date is sexual. Saying to a girl,"I WANT to see you" is sexual. Saying,"Are you a good girl or a bad girl?" is sexual.
That's what we mean by being sexual with a girl,not talking about her "tits" or "azz".
If the examples I gave of being sexual are things you're afraid to say to this girl,then you're ALREADY off track.
I'm glad you didn't say that to her.S. Pryor said:
I agree that you have to have tact,but there's a difference between using "tact" and not being sexual at all out of "FEAR".S Pryor said:
All this flirting and being sexual in your conversation with is is like pre-heating an oven. It has a purpose. It's not the goal ITSELF,simply something to help you to that goal.S. Pryor said:
You want to do this FIRST,but eventually,you have to ask her out.
All that being "sexual" means NOTHING if you don't eventually ask the girl out.
You don't pre-heat an oven for nothing. It's to prepare it for something to come.
Likewise,it's the same with flirting and teasing and being sexual. It's all to prepare her.
If you've been around her for two or three months and you haven't asked her out yet,or been sexual with her in all that time,then it IS a "friendzone" thing.S. Pryor said:
If you're afraid to say anything even remotely sexual to her,then you are friendzoned.
If you want to know for certain,then easy,ask her out.
Do not be too easy. If you are too easy to get, she will not want you. If you are too easy to keep, she will lose interest in you. If you are too easy to control, she will not respect you.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
Dating? There ain't no way...AND S. PRYOR MEANS NO WAY that I would want to be her man nor would I want her to be my woman. She's just a lil cutie and that's it. I must admit the sex all night thing did make me lmao when you said you were glad I didn't say it. But to be honest, I have known her a little longer than just a few months. In the time frame I've "known" her, we have no titles. Not strangers, not friends. Even if she considered me a "friend", I don't consider her one of mine and I refuse to indulge her in this useless babble she likes so much.
Even if there was a case for me being "friend-zoned" I don't think that's the case. It's been a WHILE since I first met her but I remember our official meeting. I was introduced to her by a friend and she couldn't keep her eyes off me. We were sitting and her ***** lips were staring a hole in my face. From then on she just always wanted to be around me. Always had this huge smile for me when I came around. STILL smiles hard for me to this day. I could engage her in "sexy talk" but I'm not interested in a relationship with her. She's one of those type of girls that ALWAYS has to have a guy(s) around her. I can't get with that. Yeah I know it sounds like a jealous move but uh uh I'm not having it if one of these thirsty bastards ends up sleeping with her and she's like "uh I'm ****ing him now but we can still be friends." *Mad Rapper voice* NAH SON NAH! Hell she even denied knowing me to one of these guys she used to hang around all the time even after SAYING MY NAME. Not appealing AT ALL. Through it all I'm kind of in an odd position because although I wanna get to know her, I REALLY wanna **** her! Like if I were to hit I wouldn't just completely try to give her ass the boot if that makes sense.
Even if there was a case for me being "friend-zoned" I don't think that's the case. It's been a WHILE since I first met her but I remember our official meeting. I was introduced to her by a friend and she couldn't keep her eyes off me. We were sitting and her ***** lips were staring a hole in my face. From then on she just always wanted to be around me. Always had this huge smile for me when I came around. STILL smiles hard for me to this day. I could engage her in "sexy talk" but I'm not interested in a relationship with her. She's one of those type of girls that ALWAYS has to have a guy(s) around her. I can't get with that. Yeah I know it sounds like a jealous move but uh uh I'm not having it if one of these thirsty bastards ends up sleeping with her and she's like "uh I'm ****ing him now but we can still be friends." *Mad Rapper voice* NAH SON NAH! Hell she even denied knowing me to one of these guys she used to hang around all the time even after SAYING MY NAME. Not appealing AT ALL. Through it all I'm kind of in an odd position because although I wanna get to know her, I REALLY wanna **** her! Like if I were to hit I wouldn't just completely try to give her ass the boot if that makes sense.
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I don't understand... answer this question, do you want her to be:S. Pryor said:
(1) a fluck buddy,
(2) your girlfriend, or
(3) neither of the above.
Your posts within this thread, to me, send mixed signals... from what I've read, it sounds like you want a LTR with her but, due to her being an attention wh*re around guys, you think automatically she will cheat on you if you take things further (is one of the reasons you don't currently have a "title" because you're already too insecure to take it to the next level with this girl?). That, and her juvenile conversational banter is a definite turn-off.
Tell us what you want. It sounds like you want her to be a fluck buddy but then you say something like "I really wanna get to know her" which, to me, implies you want something more emotionally intimate than a fluck buddy.
I don't see how anyone here can help you obtain a goal that you yourself seem unsure of at this point. If you want her as a fluck buddy, having sex with this "good girl" (which, as previous posters mentioned, has NOTHING to do with her actual sex drive) is an essential first step... without the fluck, she's just a buddy.
If you want a LTR, you'll have to establish a good emotional connection in addition to getting her horny.
If you don't know what you WANT with this girl, you'll have no idea what to do to actually GET what you want with this girl.
Make a decision and behave accordingly. Don't bump this thread again until you know what it actually is that you want us to help you attain.
I can see how this is confusing but straight up and down I don't want an LTR with her. I wanna have sex with her BUT I'm not saying that I would just **** her and not talk to her again. I wouldn't do that to her. I'm saying that I know deep down inside her that there's more than just conversations about cartoons and stupid **** about Ya Ya Sisterhood. I wanna get to know the real side of her and since she's pretty I also wanna **** her. If that means being friends with benefits then so be it. But if all there is to her is useless bull**** and these cartoon characters she usually hangs around then I don't want to be with her. That's called her being a liability and not being an ASSET. I'm trying to trim the fat so to speak. And it's not like we had a title before I found out she traveled with the penis parade she usually hangs around. We were always just two people that saw each other and talked. I'm sure you have some people in your life too that you don't really consider your friend (male or female) but you still "know" them because you see em all the time.Yeah OK said:
And the notion that "people don't know how to help" is such bull**** because I already stated what I was trying to do in the first place but getting answers out of you mother****ers was like pulling ****ing teeth. Yeah people were really rushing to answer my question....yup...they sure were that's why the thread has over 300 views and the most posts are coming from ME. "Don't know how to help" MY ASS! This is not kindergarten, you can't just tell me when I can bump my own thread and I'm just gonna accept it. I'm not having that at all. I appreciate the input but if you're going to act like that then you can take your thoughts and feelings and SHOVE IT!
Ok, it sounds like you have a oneitis for a girl that you don't think has relationship potential (and you're probably right if you feel that way this early-on). So, you want to have sex with her but your secret desire for more with this girl is what I think keeps making you send mixed signals throughout this thread.S. Pryor said:
You say you want to get to know her better without seeming like a big brother or getting friend-zoned. In other words, you want her to view you as a sexual threat. The good advice you were given? Steer the conversation to sexual topics. Your response? She's a good girl who wouldn't be able to handle a sexual topic.
She can. You assume that she can't because you obviously haven't tried to apply the advice you were already given yet, and your infatuation with the girl is making you think she's some innocent good girl. You said YOURSELF she was able to quickly catch-on that you were trying to look at her ass, and that she DID it. If this girl were ACTUALLY some pure innocent non-sexual creature, do you actually think that (1) she would have had an intuitive understanding that you were trying to check out her ass in the first place, or that (2) she would have ended up showing you her ass having already known that you have non-innocent intentions of checking her out? C'mon man, you haven't even provided that much information about your interactions with this girl and I can tell you she is NOT sexually different from any other healthy female on this planet. Make your move already!
But you've already been told that. In fact, Igetit! gave you a nice thorough breakdown of what to do. So thorough, in fact, that most people probably stopped responding because you've already received the answer to your question.
So if you don't want a relationship with her but TRULY do want to f*ck her, how do you expect to have sex with her without ever DOING or SAYING anything sexual to her? That's like trying to be close friends with someone without ever talking to them... it's illogical and not feasible without following the natural, progressive steps.S. Pryor said:
Do you really, truly believe listening to her yammer on about Blue's Clues and Ya Ya Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants for the next few months will get you ANYWHERE sexually with this girl? Of course not.. you know it, and I know it. You have to be sexual with this girl or you will get nowhere: no f*ck buddy, no LTR... you're headed to becoming close friends at best if you follow the route you're taking.
Ask her out. Be sexual with her when you go out. Going out on a "date" doesn't necessarily mean you'll be in a LTR with this girl. If you've got enough game, you can have sex with her that same night. And every other night for that matter. You can make whatever you want happen, but you have to take the RISK.
By risk I mean control the conversation and talk sexually to her, behave sexually, and ask her out for God's sake.
No more excuses for your fear of failure/rejection.
She talks about stupid sh*t so you wouldn't want a LTR with her... does she want a LTR with you right now? Doesn't seem like it to me, and she won't ever if you appear to be like every other chump she talks to who is scared to ever make a move. Separate yourself from the pack. Perhaps if you start talking to her like a man she'll stop talking to you in a childish way, as if she's still a 9-year-old girl.
You want to f*ck her but you don't think talking/acting sexual towards her will work because she's a "good girl"? Really try to process what you're saying here. If you don't have the balls to even TALK sexual with her, or ask her out, there's no way you'd be able to get her into a position to actually f*ck her.
Take the risk or be prepared to reap no benefits: the choice is your's.
starplayer
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 18, 2009
- Messages
- 226
- Reaction score
- 14
Exactly.Forty0ztoFreedom said:
I used to think some girls are different and they're too sweet to be sexual like that. In a rare number of cases that may be true but who wants asexual girls anyway?
But now I've seen the light. All women have an inner slvt, you just have to bring it out of them.
OP, you might think she's a sweet, innocent good girl who would never do anything so dirty and would get offended by your sexual thoughts.
Truth is, with the right guy in the right situation, she might be a nasty little wh0re who'll do anything and everything. She's probably got a dirtier mind than you! Society just forces her to repress and hide her sexuality.
Don't go OTT being sexual though or you'll just come across as a creep, but you must not be scared to be sexual around girls, however "good" they may seem. Hiding your sexuality always leads to the friendzone.
Remember 'band camp girl?' She didnt seem very sexual either, was always talking about stupid shyt, but look what happened...
Your magic pill is your balls. Use them, and make a move. Thats your answer. Dont say we didnt give you one.
When those 300 people know that you just need to make damn move, and its already been stated, why would they waste one of their ten posts reiterating it? I wasnt trying to insult you, but my answer was pretty obvious. If she's giving you IOI's and wont stop talking, just shut her up with kiss. Its pretty fvcking simple. Or you can interrupt, and ask, "Do you think I'm cute?' and she says yes, then you say "O.k. then.." then kiss her. Or, you can just straight up ask her on a date, in which case you will have to kiss her eventually anyway, so its pointless. Noone else needs to tell you anything more. Thats what you need to do. You KNOW what to do, and you're just looking for some magic pill. Dont get pissed off cuz noone has one for you.
Your magic pill is your balls. Use them, and make a move. Thats your answer. Dont say we didnt give you one.
Yes I do know what I need to do...find another girl that's not a ****ing basketcase or someone I won't have to ask friggin sosuave about. I don't know if she wants an LTR with me and since that's not what I I know she has sexual desires, I never said she was some real live Barbie doll. She could be an actual good girl that doesn't do "those things" or she could be the biggest freak you could ever meet. I don't know but the girl doesn't even use profanity for crying out loud. I'm just going to have to crack this girls code or fall back that's all there is to it. Michelle from band camp does make an assload of sense in this situation now that you mention it. But to this bull**** notion that I'm asking for a "magic pill" or "the answer has already given" it's all completely insane. A guy can ask a legit question and all these ****ing spectators here would just let the **** slip and fall without anybody saying ANYTHING. Some people ask questions or make statements and the **** just keeps going on and on. I know I've made threads in the past that have completely fallen under the radar but that's typical internet politics. Whatever. I know we're pretty much strangers here and we don't owe anybody anything but give your imput. I thought we were all here to be "so suave" but I see some people just wanna hog all the good **** for themselves. And **** post counts, I don't know where you cats come from but I make threads and posts when I want to. **** the ten post ****. Thanks for all the responses for those that chose to respond.