Getting tired of this sh!t

[In2theGame]

Saturday night i met this girl who was very hot but she wasnt stuck up or B*tchy. I struck up a convo with her and things were going really good and had her laughing and all... so i began getting flirty and she leaned in towards me while we are talking. I got her phone number and she asks me to text her so we can meet up again. I text and no answer. The thing is this happens with girls who are more on the prudy side. Unfortunately I do VERY good with the hot club type girls or high maintenance type. These are the ones many guys drool over and i can get them however a high percentage of them are not Girlfriend material. They are hot but tough to trust. The girls who seem more simple and more on the prudy side always question me asking "How many girls do you have" or "Is that what you tell all the girls' "your too smooth". I just dont get this sh*t. Im not going to lie, this is making my confidence drop even when i have heard countless times that im hot, sexy, gorgeous etc ive heard it all yet when i try to approach the simple girls i feel like sh*t and whats the point in trying for the GF material types.

I also get assumptions all the time that i have hundreds of women on the side or because of my look, Think im an assh0le. Any suggestions on how to lower these "simple" type girls wall's or the more GF material types? Im a very direct guy and if i think the girl is fvcking hot or sexy im going to tell her just like that. Problem is when i do they respond with "Im sure you say that to all the girls". On the outside it looks good as i have loads of options however deep down, i'd like to find a simple girlfriend type but they dont see me as BF type but a hook up type.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

I'm seeing failed $hit tests combined with a showing of desperation, and outcome dependence.

 

[ChrisFloyd]

Try to become a better person first, then...

 

[In2theGame]

I'm seeing failed $hit tests combined with a showing of desperation, and outcome dependence.

lol come on Peaks,.... Hardly desperation. I have 5 girls in rotation im bedding and all ranging from HB 7 - 9 (as far as looks are concerned) so im good there. However I may give you the outcome dependence because my personality is based on "Winning" and success. I hate to fail more than anything in all things i do.

 

[In2theGame]

I date in the 6-8 range, so ymmv if you are dating above that.

I get all the same reactions you do and I just agree and amplify and/or vulnerability game ...it works through the first couple lays. Honestly when they start accusing me of the sh!t they accuse you of I know the lay is in the bag.

After that I just keep revealing more about myself, honestly they get to a point where they see me as the sickeningly loyal nice guy I really am. Thats when the real trouble starts lol.

lol i understand. I guess i have to adjust my approach. I can get girls like this for example...http://i.imgur.com/EQcxQGF.jpg but that selfie, big t!ts, high maintenance type dont seem like GF type. The girls i struggle with is simple looking type like Shailene Woodley who i think is HOT http://i.imgur.com/zGoTwgh.jpg Those are the ones i struggle with as maybe my direct aggressive approach throws them off, Im not sure.

 

[guru1000]

You have confused good looks and game with being a quality DJ. If you do not exhibit quality, you will not attract it, irrespective of your looks/game. The problem becomes when you shop at K-Mart, you exude K-Mart quality, thus saddled with sluts like in your picture above.

Drop all your plates, raise your standards of quality, and accept no plate that fails to meet those standards. Then your game will evolve to quality-game.

 

[In2theGame]

You have confused good looks and game with being a quality DJ. If you do not exhibit quality, you will not attract it, irrespective of your looks/game. The problem becomes when you shop at K-Mart, you exude K-Mart quality, thus saddled with sluts like in your picture above.

Drop all your plates, raise your standards of quality, and accept no plate that fails to meet those standards. Then your game will evolve to quality-game.

I respect what you said here and agree however i have been with many high quality women that were beautiful with respectable careers. The problem i guess is i come off sometimes like im just going to fvck them then leave lol which is not true but thats how i came off when i think back. Another problem im facing is im sort of getting tired of picking up, hooking up and on to the next. Ive been doing it for 3 years straight and although it was fun going through Women like bowling pins... it just doesnt do it for me as much anymore and it causes my enthusiasm to decline. I see a hot girl and in my mind im thinking...."same sh!t different girl". Fvck man, maybe i just need a break from Women to re-fuel my mind. Thanks for the advice.

 

[Tenacity]

I agree with guru, it's just that finding quality chicks is like a Venture Capitalist trying to sort through a stack of business plans, just to find ONE start-up that has some type of viability.

In other words, the vast majority of the marketplace is just utter bullshyt. If you can find a chick that LIKES YOU and who doesn't come with extreme issues (multiple kids, horrible finances, horrible weight problems, personality disorders, stuck up/golddigging type)....then consider yourself successful in the dating market.

 

[guru1000]

I respect what you said here and agree however i have been with many high quality women that were beautiful with respectable careers. The problem i guess is i come off sometimes like im just going to fvck them then leave lol which is not true but thats how i came off when i think back. Another problem im facing is im sort of getting tired of picking up, hooking up and on to the next. Ive been doing it for 3 years straight and although it was fun going through Women like bowling pins... it just doesnt do it for me as much anymore and it causes my enthusiasm to decline. I see a hot girl and in my mind im thinking...."same sh!t different girl". Fvck man, maybe i just need a break from Women to re-fuel my mind. Thanks for the advice.

Brother, I have been there and done that one thousand times, unfortunately. I'm 40 and still slaying 9s in their 20s, lol. It's cyclical; one period you are enthused, next period you are disgusted. What I find is when I drop all my low-quality contenders, more quality girls hop in my band wagon for two reasons: (1) I have time to find quality contenders as I'm no longer saddled with garbage; (2) My mindset is rejuvenated and focused, so although women can still sense I have options at will, they also know I'm not banging five others at a time (which btw they can always sense) as I value who I spend my time with. In other words, I am covertly qualifying quality prospects with "hey, you look good, but that doesn't really do it for me; what else do you bring to the table?" This is the classical definition of quality.

It's funny actually. Last month I dropped 4 low-quality contenders for absolutely no reason except for their lack of substance and almost immediately 1 or 2 quality contenders joined the team. And as I once said, when I raise my quality standards and ferociously next for incompatibility (substanceless), the more quality contenders step up to bat.

 

[guru1000]

and who doesn't come with extreme issues (multiple kids, horrible finances, horrible weight problems, personality disorders, stuck up/golddigging type

Except for the gold digging attribute, lol, I never deal with plates with the issues you describe above, and I'm sure the girls I date are older than yours, and thus more likely to possess those characteristics. Better to keep your finger on the NEXT trigger, until a compatible contender that merits your attention steps up to bat.

Like in your VC analogy, it is a numbers game. Qualify, next; qualify, next ...

 

[In2theGame]

Brother, I have been there and done that one thousand times, unfortunately. I'm 40 and still slaying 9s in their 20s, lol. It's cyclical; one period you are enthused, next period you are disgusted. What I find is when I drop all my low-quality contenders, more quality girls hop in my band wagon for two reasons: (1) I have time to find quality contenders as I'm no longer saddled with garbage; (2) My mindset is rejuvenated and I'm more focused, so although women can still sense I have options at will, they also know I'm not banging five others at a time (which btw they can always sense) as I value who I spend my time with. In other words, I am covertly qualifying quality prospects with "hey, you look good, but that doesn't really do it for me; what else do you bring to the table?" This is the classical definition of quality.

It's funny actually. Last month I dropped 4 low-quality contenders for absolutely no reason except for their lack of substance and almost immediately 1 or 2 quality contenders joined the team. And as I once said, when I raise my quality standards and ferociously next for incompatibility (substanceless), the more quality contenders step up to bat.

Nice. I understand what your saying because for a while I've felt like this deep down. Right now i have 5 girls who all want me to be their Boyfriends but i dont want to because i know i can do better. They are cute/hot girls but i feel something missing but going out and meeting new girls has gotten exhausting and my motivation is down which brings my confidence down. Like Tenacity stated also, its tough finding a quality Woman who doesnt carry some type of baggage. Anyway, Looks like i need to update my bullpen with all better high quality Females.

 

[The Duke]

Saturday night i met this girl who was very hot but she wasnt stuck up or B*tchy. I struck up a convo with her and things were going really good and had her laughing and all... so i began getting flirty and she leaned in towards me while we are talking. I got her phone number and she asks me to text her so we can meet up again. I text and no answer. The thing is this happens with girls who are more on the prudy side. Unfortunately I do VERY good with the hot club type girls or high maintenance type. These are the ones many guys drool over and i can get them however a high percentage of them are not Girlfriend material. They are hot but tough to trust. The girls who seem more simple and more on the prudy side always question me asking "How many girls do you have" or "Is that what you tell all the girls' "your too smooth". I just dont get this sh*t. Im not going to lie, this is making my confidence drop even when i have heard countless times that im hot, sexy, gorgeous etc ive heard it all yet when i try to approach the simple girls i feel like sh*t and whats the point in trying for the GF material types.

I also get assumptions all the time that i have hundreds of women on the side or because of my look, Think im an assh0le. Any suggestions on how to lower these "simple" type girls wall's or the more GF material types? Im a very direct guy and if i think the girl is fvcking hot or sexy im going to tell her just like that. Problem is when i do they respond with "Im sure you say that to all the girls". On the outside it looks good as i have loads of options however deep down, i'd like to find a simple girlfriend type but they dont see me as BF type but a hook up type.

Sounds like you need to recalibrate your game a bit. The tactics you use to impress club girls aren't the same things that impress "simple" girls. Simple girls tend to be a little less emotional and reactive therefore using the rational side of their brain to keep them out of trouble therefore don't respond to your tricks the same way a club girl does. Back off your directness a little and slow things down a bit. be a bit more mysterious/aloof. Make the simple girls work harder for your attention. I wouldn't get too hung up on the comments like "i'm sure you say that to all the girls". Thats just them admitting that they know you got options. Deep down it turns them on.

When I finally settled down and got a decent gf, it took me going with out for a while and having no plates. If the girl didn't meet all of my criteria, I didn't go out with them.

 

[Tenacity]

Except for the gold digging attribute, lol, I never deal with plates with the issues you describe above, and I'm sure the girls I date are older than yours, and thus more likely to possess those characteristics. Better to keep your finger on the NEXT trigger, until a compatible contender that merits your attention steps up to bat.

Like in your VC analogy, it is a numbers game. Qualify, next; qualify, next ...

I understand, but this is why I consider myself unsuccessful as a whole in the dating market and it's because I have never (and I mean never) found just ONE chick that was of somewhat quality that I could do something long term with.

- Like I said, either she doesn't take care of herself and manage her weight properly, and gets PISSED off when you bring it up.

- And/Or, she has multiple kids by (her words now) some sorry a.ss dude which begs the question that if the dude was that sorry why did you have kids by him?

- And/Or, her finances are horrible and when I say horrible, I'm talking about the chick is a paycheck away from being homeless. Me "dycking her down" means I'm now supposed to help her pay for her $35 Boost Mobile cell phone bill because she can't afford it and they are going to "cut it off soon" if I don't pay it.

- And/Or, she is stuck up and a golddigger. Can give two rat's a.sses about you, the entire conversation is about when you taking her shopping.

I'm always told to just "NEXT" these chicks and move on, but move on to what? I have yet to just find ONE chick, just ONE....without weight issues, without baby daddy issues, without financial problems, and who just LIKES me. Just ONE...not TWO.....just fvcking ONE.

 

[BetterCallSaul]

Nice. I understand what your saying because for a while I've felt like this deep down. Right now i have 5 girls who all want me to be their Boyfriends but i dont want to because i know i can do better. They are cute/hot girls but i feel something missing but going out and meeting new girls has gotten exhausting and my motivation is down which brings my confidence down. Like Tenacity stated also, its tough finding a quality Woman who doesnt carry some type of baggage. Anyway, Looks like i need to update my bullpen with all better high quality Females.

You mentioned previously your rotation is in the 7-9 range, which is great. But here you say you can do better.

So, 7-9 looks wise, but personality wise they're what? 4-5? They're obviously in your rotation for a reason, you just need to be honest about what that reason is. Is it simply looks? Hey I understand having a great ass ride you c*ck is nice and having great tits to slap you in the face with is what I'd like to wake up to every morning, but if you're looking for a girl that's more LTR material, you just need to be honest with yourself about what it is you want.

 

[teebear]

OP, dial back the player vibe a bit and see if that helps.

 

[guru1000]

Tenacity, perhaps a change of venue is in order. Where are you meeting these chicks that they are ALL garbage?

Also you may be leading too much with the "I'm very successful" foot, thus attracting all the takers.

 

[In2theGame]

OP, dial back the player vibe a bit and see if that helps.

I think im going to do this and just have a laid back approach, maybe change my style a bit, tone down the things i say. I get a lot of assumptions because i do have a very muscular but lean physique (low BF%) and i like to wear fitted shirts tailored to my body and that attracts a lot of shallow girls so then my "game" has evolved to those types and im not so much into that "hot" wild girls as much anymore as i want the cute plane jane types as a GF. On Sat night one of those types kept looking at my body then made a comment like "So you like to show off with that shirt?" And i thought WTF its not tight and its fitted to me then she went on about my body which then her friend proceeds to tell me that at first she thought i was an azzhole Just because of they way i look, without opening my mouth, when in fact i thought she was hot and actually wanted to get to know her and get her out. Of course i wanted to fvck her but i saw a bit of potential. This has happened a lot with me much more with plane types but im going to give it a shot and change it up and see what happens. As for the girl i texted but never got a response, That night i had her leaning up against me in between my legs a bit lol i thought it was good to go but didnt work. I just have no idea why tell me to call/text if youre going to ignore. Anyway, thanks for the short but good advice.

 

[Tenacity]

Tenacity, perhaps a change of venue is in order. Where are you meeting these chicks that they are ALL garbage?

Also you may be leading too much with the "I'm very successful" foot, thus attracting all the takers.

The average guy wouldn't consider them garbage because most guys have no issue dating a chick that's a 7+ with kids and bad finances, because give or take the guy would pick up the slack. I'm not all for that.

I don't know, I don't want to take away from the OP's thread, but I guess I'm just still going through a frustration phase of not being able to get what I originally wanted. I never found the girl I truly wanted and I have deep (very deep) trust issues with women as a WHOLE when it comes to relationships. It's a double edged sword. I have to deal with women on a plating situation that I DON'T really "like that much," while at the same time because I deep down don't trust none of these bytches...the general disliking towards them just eats at me.

I guess you can say I'm going through a "I hate women stage". I'm man enough to admit this. When I come out of this stage I will be able to settle into my "new life" of forever plating and friends with benefits. That vasectomy is getting done this Summer as I already stated.

 

[zekko]

I have 5 girls in rotation im bedding and all ranging from HB 7 - 9

Exhibit A: Here we have a guy who is sleeping with five girls at once, all rated 7-9. I imagine most guys who come to this forum would be thrilled with this arrangement. But notice that the poster is still not satisfied, he is looking for something deeper.

I was about the same age as the OP when I was tiring of all the dating around/plate spinning/casual hookups/whatever you want to call it. The fact is that (for many guys, anyway) at some point you realize it is ultimately unsatisfying. And they may call it beta, or AFC, but that is why when you get to a certain age, a lot of guys will get into a LTR. Maybe it isn't a perfect solution, but I've found it to be much more satisfying that sleeping around.

 

[stevo]

Exhibit A: Here we have a guy who is sleeping with five girls at once, all rated 7-9. I imagine most guys who come to this forum would be thrilled with this arrangement. But notice that the poster is still not satisfied, he is looking for something deeper.

I was about the same age as the OP when I was tiring of all the dating around/plate spinning/casual hookups/whatever you want to call it. The fact is that (for many guys, anyway) at some point you realize it is ultimately unsatisfying. And they may call it beta, or AFC, but that is why when you get to a certain age, a lot of guys will get into a LTR. Maybe it isn't a perfect solution, but I've found it to be much more satisfying that sleeping around.

Funny thing is a friend around your age was schooling me on same thought process yesterday.

He was saying it's nice to be single, fcuk different girls, you dont have to deal with them, you do whatever you want but sometimes you would get lonely and the older I get my perspective of DJing would change.

His advise was dont shut the door on commitment, if you do meet a good girl, wife her up.