Getting the first date

[Genesis5]

Hey guys, for the most part I am a pretty confident guy when it comes to face to face meets. I usually do the best when in person. My online/texting game is not all that great but it's good enough to spike interest.

The problem comes to when I actually have to setup a first date. I'll give you one example:

+ Met a chick online (redhead, sexy)
+ She put up a lot of resistance at first, I went for the number pretty quickly - combatted a little bit of it and eventually she texted me.
+ We flirted a lot, she sent selfies, little jokes etc.

Pretty early on she wanted to meet soon, so I was like great! Picked up the phone and called her to make sure she wasn't some catfish dude online playing a prank. Conversation went great, had a few laughs, discussed setting up meeting but no definite plans (Though I did try to setup a time/date)

Here's where it gets shifty:

Called her the next day to try and solidify plans and I sounded like a freakin nervous wreck. Lots of "uh" and "um" it was horrible. So it went from being excited about a plan to "Thursday sounds good, but let's play it by ear" - I know it hasn't happened and maybe because she is a busy woman this could be legit, maybe I'm just overthinking this whole thing but I've always had trouble getting to the first date.

I have plenty of plates, and I know I shouldn't care about 1 of them, but honestly I'm somewhat excited about this one. I'll be kind of disappointed if it flakes out and doesn't pan.

I feel like my momentum always drops days after the initial talk. The excitement wears down, and I start to become this chump punk that can't game. Anyone else experience this sudden drop of momentum? Is this the norm?

 

[dustmuffin]

Let's play it by ear means no....she has low interest.

 

[Poon King]

Don't pedestalize individual b!tches. Just don't. There is absolutely no benefit to it.

Also.. its best to minimize "neutral time" spent on women prior to f*cking them. The more neutral time you allow the more likely they will find ways shift things onto their terms instead of yours. You cannot give women time to think. There is a reason there is such a thing called the "high pressure sale". You need to present an opportunity with a sense of urgency that it will be lost if action is not taken. This is why I have a low flake rate.

I never call women I haven't slept with. Only text. Talking on the phone is my weakest game in general because I hate talking on the phone.. not just with women but with anyone. So I don't use it.

Always play to your strengths.. not your weaknesses.

 

[Arcturus]

Don't message her for a week or two and then hit her up as if starting fresh. Try to pump her state and rebuild a connection by joking around for a bit and then quickly set a firm date to hang out in person. If she messages you first, be friendly but try to keep the conversation short and set that date. If she blows you off in two weeks for the second time, you have to next her.

 

[Genesis5]

Yep. I fvked this one up big time. Went all wishy washy not sure what to do bs.

Chalk it up to the game I guess. Onto the next one.

 

[marmel75]

Why are you calling chicks you just started talking with 2 days in a row? Why didn't you set up something definitively with her on the first call?

"Hey, I want to get together and grab a drink one night this week, what's your schedule looking like/when are you free/I'm free Tuesday or Thursday night, which works better?"

The whole point is there should have NEVER BEEN a second call if you would have just handled the first call properly, and you wouldn't have found yourself in this situation.
This is what I'm talking about with new chicks...many times guys shoot themselves in the foot by overdoing things instead of just keeping them simple.

Next time SET a SPECIFIC DATE, TIME AND PLACE on the initial call or thru text. As an aside there is NO benefit from talking to a woman on the phone versus texting her to set up a date. NONE, ZERO, NADA, ZILCH. However, if you sound nervous or boring, etc there is a VERY HIGH downside in that she likely will lose interest, which is what seems to have happened in this case. Your goal is to get her out in person, any "talking" can be done in date.

 

[Genesis5]

You're right Marmel.

Thanks for the insight. I'll keep that in mind for the next one.

 

[PantyWhisperer]

I'm with the ones who say the second call was a mistake. I would have reverted back to text. Keep the mystery going.