Getting shutdown in public

[kan]

Hey hi everybody this is my first post on the forum but i've been looking around here from quite some time now, decided to create an account because i have some problems currently this is not really all about seducing women but i hope you'll be able to help me still.

So first i'm 17 years old, the main things I enjoy doing are partying, playing video games and programming i'm also overweight (172cm 80kg).

I began applying some things said on SS, and I noticed changes, girls looking at me more, smiling at me and for the first time i don't even need to talk to people, they just seem to be with/near me when i'm close to them.

So my main problem is that i'm still getting shutdowned infront of others sometimes for example one guy in my class just makes fun of me being overweight and is trying to put me down everytime he can ( I don't really care about what he says, just smilling to him and turning back when he tries to make fun of me) so yeah i don't really know how to deal with this guy since i never really had someone that seemed to just want to "kill" me socially it's even more strange since when i'm not doing anything he just comes to me and we're having a good time so if someone already had some friends like him can tell me what to do i'll be more than happy.

Thanks to the people who will answer

 

[UndercoverAlpha]

1) Start doing a physically demanding sport or something similar, when I was 14 I joined a MMA club and it have helped changing my life around.

2) Lose weight, lift and get buffed. Possibly the most important thing.

3) Calm down with the video games, they are nothing but timewasters. Get some other hobbies, it will not only make you happier but also higher your SMV.

4) GAME!

 

[kan]

Thanks for your answers i'll start doing that.

 

[devilkingx2]

1) Start doing a physically demanding sport or something similar, when I was 14 I joined a MMA club and it have helped changing my life around.

2) Lose weight, lift and get buffed. Possibly the most important thing.

3) Calm down with the video games, they are nothing but timewasters. Get some other hobbies, it will not only make you happier but also higher your SMV.

4) GAME!

I agree with all except 3, there's nothing wrong with fun.

 

[UndercoverAlpha]

I agree with all except 3, there's nothing wrong with fun.

Of course, but there can be too much of a (not that good) thing. Personally I still play some games from time to time, but I seldom have the time and I feel better when I've accomplished something.

...Although way too much time is being is spent doing jack-all on the internet. Installed "StayFocusd" (yes it's spelled like that) and I'm seeing some improvement.

 

[Suspens]

So my main problem is that i'm still getting shutdowned infront of others sometimes for example one guy in my class just makes fun of me being overweight and is trying to put me down everytime he can ( I don't really care about what he says, just smilling to him and turning back when he tries to make fun of me)
Thanks to the people who will answer

Well that's the problem. DON'T smile at such bs.

Do you have any friends? Don't lurk around alone, find some friends. Right now just try to avoid. No stress, fear or anything, think as if you are avoiding a stinking animal and lookinf for fresh air.

You gotta crush his ego just the moment he starts ****-talking. No other way around.

And yeah, Videogames are destructive for us self-conscious betas.

 

[mynameisntNigel]

3) Calm down with the video games, they are nothing but timewasters.

Never stop gaming.

 

[Mike32ct]

This guy isn't your friend. He's bad news. Don't smile at him. Absolutely do NOT welcome his company when he comes over to hang out. Limit yourself to one word answers and then talk to someone else.

In your eagerness to be liked and be popular, it is easy to rationalize that he's a good guy and just joking. But trust me, that's a mistake. He's not a good guy at all.

 

[Masculinity]

I agree with Mike, this guy may seem like an option now that you don't have friends. However, he's more toxic than good to you. By smiling, you are just welcoming his bashful behavior. I would ignore him altogether and start working on improving your diet.

Where and what do you mostly eat?
How old are you and in what grade?
Have you taken a health class before?

If neglected, this situation can easily turn into bullying. Is there a counselor or a psychologist you can talk to at school? I know some of these questions are personal. Feel free to send me a personal message by clicking on my screen name and then selecting the option.

 

[Skyline]

Hey hi everybody this is my first post on the forum but i've been looking around here from quite some time now, decided to create an account because i have some problems currently this is not really all about seducing women but i hope you'll be able to help me still.

So first i'm 17 years old, the main things I enjoy doing are partying, playing video games and programming i'm also overweight (172cm 80kg).

There's nothing wrong with any of those as long as you learn how to balance them out. For example, I play a lot of video games but I still work out, go to my job, build credit, and groom myself. Gaming is a hobby just don't let that hobby take over yourself and you'll be fine.

One of the things I regret that I didn't do in high school was sports. I'm actually very athletic. Do it man. You have so many opportunities to not only improve physically but meet new people. And you never know, you could be the best at something in some sport. I know I was equally if not a little better than some of the best people in some sports and If I wasn't the best I was definitely intermediate. Except for Tennis, that sport is difficult.

So my main problem is that i'm still getting shutdowned infront of others sometimes for example one guy in my class just makes fun of me being overweight and is trying to put me down everytime he can ( I don't really care about what he says, just smilling to him and turning back when he tries to make fun of me) so yeah i don't really know how to deal with this guy since i never really had someone that seemed to just want to "kill" me socially it's even more strange since when i'm not doing anything he just comes to me and we're having a good time so if someone already had some friends like him can tell me what to do i'll be more than happy.

Thanks to the people who will answer

The thing about "smiling and ignoring them" is that it doesn't work. It's submissive and generally just weak. But on the other hand, fighting physically is pretty much on the same level. Both done out of fear.

There's two ways you can handle people like this:

1. When someone starts saying something to you, stop what you're doing turn around and walk straight up to them and look them dead in the eyes. That alone usually shuts them up but if they're feeling overtly confident ask them what they said and to not say sh*t like that to you ever again. Also something to note is that body language is key here. You have to look like you're ready to fight without actually fighting. So clenched fist, angry face, not smiling, pointing at them when you're telling them off, chest out, looking them dead in the eye, arms floating by your side, and legs spread apart.

9/10 they will back off. The times that the other person won't back off is when they are generally expecting YOU to throw the first punch(unless you seriously p*ssed them off before), but that's when you walk away.

2. This way is a little bit more passive but requires more confidence and creative charisma. Let's say somebody calls you a fat fvck. Basically you don't get offended by this and you reply with: "Girls like fat guys you should try it some time." And if they say: "Yeah other fat girls do..." then you would say: "Ugly girls are more playful in bed, why are you so shallow!?"

Basically you flip the script and make it seem like that negative that THEY said is actually a positive by being a NEGATIVE for them. This also works on women, it's called "Neg Hitting." Some people will love you for it and some will not, but that's how life really is. People like you or they don't.

But yeah, join a sport and find a BALANCE!

 

[Who Dares Win]

A high school guy had similar problems when I was in my early 20s and doing wrestling, he joined our class to build some confidence and get in shape.

First of all the confidence and aggressivity he got from learning the moves and sparring against an uncooperative partner changed his personality, he got in shape which was already great but he surely was no longer the weak submissive guy that his leftist family wanted him to be.

Even funnier is that a couple of bad guys from the class (some boxers which were learning grappling for their mma plan) started teaching him how to behave in such situations except that they pushed it too much, once I overheard one of them telling him to keep a stone in his pocket in case his bare hands were not enough.

Long story short, the kid solved the problem with the bullies by throwing the chief of the bad guys on the ground and choking him, when questioned from the teacher he told her go back in her place and when his parents where summoned he waited in the parking lot holding a roman salute position. (dont do any of that)

Now in case you are wondering the message is, get in shape and possibly do it with an activity that also increase your self confidence and masculinity, dont follow short fix suggestion because its not part of you and you cannot keep such frame, you have to change yourself and the necessary action will come natural to you, you cannot confront someone if you dont have what it takes to back up your words.

I suggest you a grappling martial arts which teach you how to fight in safe way (no broken noses or jaws) and give you a better body and mental sharpness.

The funny thing is that the same moment you have what it takes to face challenges, no one is gonna challenge you anymore, also dont forget you may find precious allies.