Getting gals at workplace...

[rj077]

fellow pple...

After going through articles, reading dating stuff ( David d & mystery) , m pretty confident abt tackling this part of my life... though i started pretty late....

But failure to understand a particular situation, ( i hope many of u have guys experinced it) , specially when ones inner conscience is driving u to find what works and what dosn't, leaves some1 frustrated and hece, again going back 2 internet and other stuff 2 find new ways.

Advice needed....

How to get girls in a workplace.... specially when interactions is limited to 1-2 times a day... that 2 in groups etc.... One can't think of using a ****y/funny or a pickup line in an office.... nor ther's any scope of seducing her with ur charms etc since no interactions are in person.

The only personal interaction medium is official e-mail id, flirting via e-mail dosnt seem a great way, (its possible, she may be laughing with her friends viewing those crap e-mails etc).

Situation :

theres a chick that m interested in at office.
its a small office, so every1 knows every other person.
Initially, i send her few flirtitous e-mails ( i think, it was a mistake), now, she laughs at my jokes when pple are around, but kinda ignores me if somehow we r momentarily alone. Eye-contacts r frequent...... (thats something good & a motivational factor ) but only for a brief period.
Since, she sits far away 4m me.... so no adhoc discussions. & since i hav already sent few mails.... my intentions would be clear 2 her by now.

Can you fellow don jaun suggest any ways to interact with her & where possibly (if any) i may have went wrong in my approach ?


-Rj

 

[Skel]

Personally I suggest not messing with girls at your work. Leads to bad situations.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...Advice needed....

Don't.

 

[yep]

I think the email's before approaching were a little weird. The best thing would have just been to approach her and build attraction, then to further your build send c+f emails occasionally. I kinda think you messed up dont i dont know the entire situation.

If you want to get all you can out of it just approach her maybe on a friday or thursday before the weekend and tell her something like this.

"Hey look i'm going out to so and so tomorrow you can come if you want".

That way you just get the date. A number wont be neccessary try leaving from work with her. If she likes you enough she will go if not no biggie.

 

[rj077]

I realize that e-mail stuff was a mistake.. & bigger still... my sense of security is been dependent on her resposes.... which places me in the back seat in the relationship..... need 2 impove that...

-Rj

 

[DonRaul]

Work is not the best of places if you you're looking for something short term. If you really like this girl then here's my advice.

Personally I don't think she's that into to you. That ackward email doesnt help. She may feel uncomfortable being alone with you.
So here is some bullet points to do in order:

* Make her feel comfortable
* When you make eye contact make sure you smile or else you may just look like a stalker
* Try getting a conversation with her about something that's interesting to her. (have you overheard her talking about any specific topic)
* Build up an email conversation for 3 days straight (or im) and then disappear for 4.
* After she is comfortable (this is crucial!), you can playfully ask her "so when are you taking me to lunch "
* At lunch (read dj articles) do what your taught here kino, listen, talk about her interest
* Get a feel for how she likes you. If you think her interest level is low then rinse and repeat the steps here until you increase it to a sufficient level for dating.

 

[rj077]

Kinda.... sometimes i think to leave this gal and walk on... but been aspired to be a true DJ, i cant let this kinda rejection get into me till she specifically says no 2 me.....

We had few instances, when we made eye-contacts & smiled at each other..... so , me been regular in reading articles here, got kinda excited and & sent her a mail asking for her private id to take things to the next level... , she politely rejected that request and has a aroma of smile on her face after that whenever she sees me... but somehow she manages to be serious when she gets close enough for a conversation to take place....

its also possible, she may be playing some sort of game around me (that mysterious smile)... but since iam not sure about this, I am not confident enough to continue initiating everytime.......

good comments Donraul, will follow those bullets points for the next week....

-Rj

 

[WesCottII]

I can advise you from personal experience to stay away from girls at work. Honestly.

 

[yep]

I'm with WesCottII. You got off on the wrong foot, just learn from it and move on. You will be putting way to much energy into this and there is about a 80% chance the outcome wont be pretty.

DonRaul is right but i dont think using these techniques is good for your situation at hand. I would just leave her alone.