Game vs Finances: Needed Some Opinions

[nicksaiz65]

Morning guys. I’ve had some thoughts swirling through my head that I wanted some opinions on.

I’ll need to give you some background on me first. I’m a software engineer, and I make around 80K a year total. Some of that money is coming from my side hustle as a session musician, which I do during the week after work and on Sundays. I live in a small town. I need to drive about an hour to Nashville to have the volume necessary to game.

The biggest issue that I have on my plate right now is that I don’t have a car of my own, due to a bad wreck I got in a few months ago. I’ve circumvented this a bit through rental cars. Originally I wanted to get a car loan, but the people at the bank think my credit is too new, so I got declined. I refuse to co-sign with my parents at this point. I also eventually decided that it was better to do this the Dave Ramsey way and work towards being completely debt free, he’s very against car notes.

That leads to my financial/game goals within one year of today:
1.) Have a car of my own paid for in cash with no car note
2.) After this purchase, retain a decent sized emergency fund to protect against life, potential layoffs and more importantly, the car breaking down so I’m never in this situation again.
3.) Have enough money put to the side so that I can make it through this upcoming wedding season completely unscathed
4.) Sleep with 10-12+ new women through a combination of Cold Approach and Online Dating

When you factor in my fitness goals and my current salary, just achieving those goals alone would put me ahead of the average American imo.

I’m thinking that to achieve these goals, I need to put away somewhere between 1.5-2K a month. However, if I’m renting a car every single weekend to go out, this quickly becomes nearly impossible.

I’m thinking of making an argument that for my current goals, I should rent a car and go out every other weekend instead of every single weekend like I’ve been doing. And no, this is not an excuse to avoid rejection lol. I’m also in a pickup group that has weekly challenges, but I’m still thinking it could be best to explain my situation and haggle to go out every other weekend. I think every other weekend is the sweet spot because sitting at the house saving money but being sexless is not an option.

This Would Have Several Advantages, with the First Being the Most Important:
1.) I can easily save the money needed to hit my goals for this year. I wouldn’t have to be so stressed about finances because my side hustle and game expenses would literally cancel each other out. I really need to achieve these goals, because if a year from today all I have to show is a few thousand dollars in my bank account, I’ll be quite upset.
2.) I usually crash at my Wing’s place every time I go to Nashville. By going every other week, I can make sure I’m not wearing out my welcome. I also buy him drinks and pay the Uber fares when I am there for letting me crash.
3.) Because I’m saving so aggressively, even if I want to go(or get invited) to a trip with friends or to a concert, it doesn’t totally derail my financial plan. It’s not even a worry.
4.) This is somewhat outside of the scope of this thread, but going out every other weekend makes it so much easier to keep getting in better shape. I can extended fast longer, there’s less drinking and less late night bar food. I could even work extra gigs on the weekends I’m not out gaming, to bring in more money and build my financial base. I’d also study my Computer Science and increase my skills so that I can eventually jump into a higher paying software job.
5.) Extra time to do whatever I need to do, since I’m always complaining about never having enough time. Again, somewhat outside of the scope of this thread

The only other option would be for me to take the bus every single Friday up to Nashville, and then game for a day then come back Saturday evening so I can make my gigs on Sunday. I’ve taken the bus to Nashville a handful of times. But at this point in my life, I’d almost just rather not: being on the bus that much would drive me crazy. I’d rather just go out every two weeks with a rental car and game hard on those days. It’s still an average of 4 days a month.

I would love to go out every single weekend if I could, but I think that if I don’t start building a financial base, I’m eventually going to hit a wall that makes it very difficult to game or eventually move to a bigger city because I didn’t plan enough for my financial future. I hate to disappoint my wings by not being out every single weekend, but this is starting to make a lot of sense.

I also think that this is sufficient action to achieve my pvssy goals for this year. There’s absolutely no reason that I can’t hit between 80-100 approaches a month doing this routine, I’d argue that’s way more than the average guy approaches. Combine that with eventually online, and I think that these goals regarding getting new pvssy are very realistic.

Hopefully this didn’t go on too long, but I just wanted to get all of my thoughts on the page and get some feedback from you all.

TL;DR:

Is it a good idea, as a game guy to go out every other weekend instead of every weekend so I can ensure that I hit my financial goals this year?

 

[nicksaiz65]

Rereading this, I suppose there’s nothing stopping me from doing the Rental Car thing two weekends a month and then just riding the bus up and back on the other weekends, going out Fridays.

That would only run me like an extra $200 a month. At that point I’d only have to worry about not wearing out my welcome with my wing.

But then I lose the time benefits and the easier fitness benefits as well.

Very complicated situation lol, I realize that more as I type this out.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Is it a good idea, as a game guy to go out every other weekend instead of every weekend so I can ensure that I hit my financial goals this year?

Yes. You should have other stuff in your life besides girls

 

[EyeBRollin]

First, move to Nashville. Sounds like you are in the middle of nowhere. Get out of there asap.

 

[member160292]

I would do as much as you can to maximize your income. 26-30 is the point where you can take a lot of risk with your career to set yourself up to have a blast in your 30's. With the inflation, you'll likely need to more than double your income to live comfortably.

If you have to drive an hour to a place with <1M population, you should think about relocating somewhere with more talent. It drastically helps when you have more opportunities to meet women.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Yes. You should have other stuff in your life besides girls

Yeah… I agree with “taking massive action” for the most part but I don’t think it’s smart to blow all my money. Plus, if in once a year has passed all I had was a few thousand bucks to my name(after two years of working) I’d be so pissed lol.

I think there’s a middle ground, with 80-100 approaches a month and going out every other weekend being that balance for me. Wanted to run it by you guys

 

[nicksaiz65]

First, move to Nashville. Sounds like you are in the middle of nowhere. Get out of there asap.

Yeah, I love Nashville. The only thing that is stopping me from moving is lack of a car atm and a lack of savings.

Once I have those two, I’m outta this town. I realize the cost of living is lower here but I’d also get paid more in a bigger city.

I originally thought that living in a small town gave me an advantage because the cost of living is lower, but as I type it out I realize you get paid less as well. One of my priorities this year will be improving my Computer Science skills so I can hang in the big jobs.

 

[EyeBRollin]

There is no advantage to single men living in a small towns. The opportunities are in cities. You can move to a small town after you settle down.

 

[nicksaiz65]

I would do as much as you can to maximize your income. 26-30 is the point where you can take a lot of risk with your career to set yourself up to have a blast in your 30's. With the inflation, you'll likely need to more than double your income to live comfortably.

If you have to drive an hour to a place with <1M population, you should think about relocating somewhere with more talent. It drastically helps when you have more opportunities to meet women.

This inflation is absolutely insane. I agree.

For moving, it seems that the main play is for my to get more leverage by increasing my software engineering skills. Then after I have the car sorted and some money in the bank, I can get a higher paying job and move to a bigger city.

Originally, I had told myself that I wanted to take a year and pay off all of my student debt(about 25K) before I move to a bigger city. Do you think that’s necessary, though?

 

[nicksaiz65]

There is no advantage to single men living in a small towns. The opportunities are in cities. You can move to a small town after you settle down.

I’d do either Nashville or Miami in that case. Likely Nashville, though.

 

[member160292]

This inflation is absolutely insane. I agree.

For moving, it seems that the main play is for my to get more leverage by increasing my software engineering skills. Then after I have the car sorted and some money in the bank, I can get a higher paying job and move to a bigger city.

Originally, I had told myself that I wanted to take a year and pay off all of my student debt(about 25K) before I move to a bigger city. Do you think that’s necessary, though?

Your work sounds pretty stable, I think you can dive right into a bigger city. Time is the only thing you can't make up for.

Depending on what interest rate you signed up for, it might be a good idea to just make the minimum monthly payment. Cash is king right now.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I’d do either Nashville or Miami in that case. Likely Nashville, though.

Nashville is cool but Miami is better. Nashville is too small of a city. It should have a major international airport. If you like the southeast, try Dallas, Houston, or Atlanta.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Your work sounds pretty stable, I think you can dive right into a bigger city. Time is the only thing you can't make up for.

Depending on what interest rate you signed up for, it might be a good idea to just make the minimum monthly payment. Cash is king right now.

One of the reasons I enjoy working for my current company is that we’re expanding and looking for new talent instead of doing all these nasty job cuts that are going on in the industry right now. I work remote, as well.

If I were to replace my current side hustle with another one I could likely afford the big city at 80K as long as I had a car(so I’m not constantly renting) and money in the bank. I might not even have to switch the main software job right away lol.

My lease expires in September 2024 so I have time. Maybe it makes sense to set a goal of living in a big city by then.

Something is telling me to get a cool roommate, or avoid getting a $2000 apartment.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Nashville is cool but Miami is better. Nashville is too small of a city. It should have a major international airport. If you like the southeast, try Dallas, Houston, or Atlanta.

I can’t speak on Dallas or Houston, but I do have some family and wings in Atlanta. Have pulled from there with them, every time I’ve done it it’s been a blast. Miami is amazing too, of course.

You know what I just realized? My wing in Nashville wants to go to Miami too. Maybe I go all in on saving and getting a higher paying job, and offer to room with him once my lease expires. And just get my full “Nashville experience” in the months leading up to that.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Yo @SW15 remind me of the max acceptable age you said to have roommates? 30?

I love my solo bachelor pad, but by the time I attempt this move I’d be 27. Maybe it makes sense to capitalize on that and spare my wallet a bit while I still have the time.

 

[SW15]

I’ll need to give you some background on me first. I’m a software engineer, and I make around 80K a year total. Some of that money is coming from my side hustle as a session musician, which I do during the week after work and on Sundays. I live in a small town. I need to drive about an hour to Nashville to have the volume necessary to game.

First, move to Nashville. Sounds like you are in the middle of nowhere. Get out of there asap.

I love Nashville. The only thing that is stopping me from moving is lack of a car atm and a lack of savings.

The $80k income is awesome at 26.

It is better to live in Nashville than live in a smaller town an hour away from Nashville. Areas with under 150,000 in population don't make sense for men who are 25+ and not in a multi-year LTR with their high school or college sweetheart. Men who find themselves single after age 25 need to be a bigger metro area.

If you wanted a longer term relationship, you'd have a difficult time getting it. No woman in Nashville is going to commute 1 hour outside of the city to have an extended relationship. She has way too many options within Nashville to consider that. Also, your small town is a challenge for finding LTRs in that town and also living a player lifestyle in a small town doesn't work. You've been doing the most viable thing you can given the situation, which is only getting one night stands and casual sex in the nearby bigger city.

Longer term, the best play is to be in Nashville or some other larger city.

If you were in Nashville, you could keep your current job and commute to the smaller town. You might not even need to commute 5 days a week.

You need your own car as soon as possible.

There is no advantage to single men living in a small towns. The opportunities are in cities. You can move to a small town after you settle down.

I spoke to a lot of this in the preceding text block. There is a danger in moving to a small town after "settling down". A lot of relationships fail so that means the man is likely to eventually need to move back to the bigger cities or end up fighting it out as an older guy in a smaller town. Neither situation is good, especially if he ends up as a single dad.

Yo @SW15 remind me of the max acceptable age you said to have roommates? 30?

I love my solo bachelor pad, but by the time I attempt this move I’d be 27. Maybe it makes sense to capitalize on that and spare my wallet a bit while I still have the time.

In most cities, women expect men to have their own place and not have roommates once they turn 30. After turning 30, the only places in the USA where roommates are considered acceptable are the expensive Northeast or West Coast cities. While a 30 year old man is less penalized for having roommates in Los Angeles than Houston, the 30 year old man in Los Angeles is better off for having his own place.

Is it a good idea, as a game guy to go out every other weekend instead of every weekend so I can ensure that I hit my financial goals this year?

Your seduction goals matter more. You're also spending a lot on hotel and transportation costs in order to try to get your penis wet in a bigger city.

 

[nicksaiz65]

The $80k income is awesome at 26.

It is better to live in Nashville than live in a smaller town an hour away from Nashville. Areas with under 150,000 in population don't make sense for men who are 25+ and not in a multi-year LTR with their high school or college sweetheart. Men who find themselves single after age 25 need to be a bigger metro area.

If you wanted a longer term relationship, you'd have a difficult time getting it. No woman in Nashville is going to commute 1 hour outside of the city to have an extended relationship. She has way too many options within Nashville to consider that. Also, your small town is a challenge for finding LTRs in that town and also living a player lifestyle in a small town doesn't work. You've been doing the most viable thing you can given the situation, which is only getting one night stands and casual sex in the nearby bigger city.

Longer term, the best play is to be in Nashville or some other larger city.

If you were in Nashville, you could keep your current job and commute to the smaller town. You might not even need to commute 5 days a week.

You need your own car as soon as possible.



I spoke to a lot of this in the preceding text block. There is a danger in moving to a small town after "settling down". A lot of relationships fail so that means the man is likely to eventually need to move back to the bigger cities or end up fighting it out as an older guy in a smaller town. Neither situation is good, especially if he ends up as a single dad.



In most cities, women expect men to have their own place and not have roommates once they turn 30. After turning 30, the only places in the USA where roommates are considered acceptable are the expensive Northeast or West Coast cities. While a 30 year old man is less penalized for having roommates in Los Angeles than Houston, the 30 year old man in Los Angeles is better off for having his own place.



Your seduction goals matter more. You're also spending a lot on hotel and transportation costs in order to try to get your penis wet in a bigger city.

Thanks man. It’s hard work but I’m pretty proud of my income. I’m content with this income for the time being, though over time.

So based on this thread, my absolute number one priority should be getting a car. After that, getting my finances to a basic level where I can live in Nashville, with the emergency fund and all that ish so that my base is built. I’ll work towards building my skills and maybe getting another job, but if anything else I could keep the job I have. I do work remote, after all.

As long as I wasn’t blowing my money, I could probably live in Nashville with a bachelor pad without a roommate.

Eventually, I’d want to move to an even bigger city but at the very least Nashville is on the map lol.

 

[Millard Fillmore]

80k a year in a small town should give you plenty of room to save and even buy a used car. You don't need anything fancy right? Just pay cash if you can for something old but reliable for now. Meanwhile put away emergency savings for 6 months to a year. (Pay any debts first though if you have them.) Then you can move somewhere with better logistics.

 

[nicksaiz65]

80k a year in a small town should give you plenty of room to save and even buy a used car. You don't need anything fancy right? Just pay cash if you can for something old but reliable for now. Meanwhile put away emergency savings for 6 months to a year. (Pay any debts first though if you have them.) Then you can move somewhere with better logistics.

Great advice. I’m happy that I’ve done a good job building my income and I don’t have to stress it too much. I just need to focus on building my skills so that I can get an even higher income in the future.

I definitely don’t need anything fancy to drive, and I don’t desire to have a car note.

I have about $35,000 in debt right now, primarily coming from school. So would you recommend that I eliminate those debts before I move to a city with better logistics? Or should I just go ahead and “maximize my time” and move to the big city after the car and emergency fund are complete?

I guess either way I’ll keep getting laid, but I think it’s productive to discuss which is more efficient.

Hopefully I can find a reliable used car once I have $12,000 cash saved up. Of course, I’m going to drive it to hell and back so maybe it’s better to get an even cheaper one than that? I’ll see, the main thing is just that I have the cash to replace it if something goes wrong on hand.

Tbh, the main thing that is causing me the most grief is lack of a car. If I had that, and a big enough savings so that if it got destroyed it’s just a small inconvenience? That elevates me financially and I’d already be much more content.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

I’d do either Nashville or Miami in that case. Likely Nashville, though.

Nashville for white girls, Miami for latinas and Atlanta for black girls depending on your preference