Fvcked up the social circle date, again.

Soma

Banned
Joined
Jun 17, 2004
Messages
499
Reaction score
0
Location
Bay Area, California
Hmmm, I rarely post these things but here goes something short and sweet.

Tonight I had a date with a girl I met through a friend a couple weeks back. To make a long story short, I didn't put the moves on her and I just KNOW I got slotted as the nice guy friend in her mind. Which really doesn't bug me cause I plan on using her as a pivot now. Win win situation. The part that does bother me is this is my THIRD fvck up in a row when it comes to social circle lays. Like fvck man, I have this block in me that makes it hard for me to put the moves on any girl i date from my social circle. Arrgh!

When it come to girls I meet from clubs, malls, coffee shops...wherever doesn't matter just as long as it's not from my social circle...man it's easy as hell. Date, back to my house, quick tour, up to my room, and bam, we're fvckin like it's going out of style. Done deal. But when it comes to social circle...arrrgh! hahah

It's like I have the opposite problem of most guys who can get social circle lays easy peasy but can't do cold approaches. I can do approaches wherever, even on the net and get great results (who says the net is a bad place p/u chicks?!) and turn them into lays. I can easily get DATES from social circle but transitioning those social circle dates into actual LAYS...that's my problem.

If any of you social circle don juans have some advice, I'm all ears.

So there's no confusion, when I say "dates" I don't mean I take them out, pay for their dinner, blah blah blah. I never do that. I only use the word "date" because it's the commonly used word.

And please, no replies from guys saying what they THINK I should do. Only reply if you KNOW what to do because you have EXPERIENCE, and a good amount of it. Thanks.

-Soma
 

Don_Marko

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 23, 2004
Messages
352
Reaction score
1
Location
Ontario
What's blocking you is subconcious peer pressure.... you are less likely to do sht because you are hesitant about rep. Same goes for her cuz she doesn't want 'slut' label. In order to avoid that you'll either have to be honest with your friends that you are a player or wait for the rumors to spread. That means you have to play the game with a player jersey on you ;)

I bet you that the reason why you don't get lays is cuz you don't even try as hard as you would on a girl met in club.
 

sensible juan

Banned
Joined
Sep 22, 2004
Messages
14
Reaction score
0
Age
48
Location
West coast Africa
Oh this is simple, just switch your personality why youre successful with girls in the club is that they see you as a classy gentlemen they will do anything for a classy gents.Because all their lifes what they see in cheap clubs they frequent are loser.

So to get girls in your social circle you have to be a ruffneck that doesn't give a hoot about their class when i say a ruffneck i dont mean you should go and get your self a gold teeth and tie a scarf on your head like a one legged pimpo. Just be without attitude say what you want to say and be rude when i say be rude i mean be rude.

Oh so sad i am getting old and lazy now[that happens when youre natural]. I remember my years in the field i will walk up to classy HB9 and say [with my best smile,smile disarm] with sincerity in my voice- that is a beautiful dress youre putting on she will say thanks[everyone love compliments] and i will let that sink then i will be stuttering bu! but but! but She will say but what then i will say but it doesn't fit.

What will you see - a jaw droping bulldog infront of you with low self esteem some will get back at you- so what is your problem and i will say oh my problem! my problem is to make sure you look the part and i will say right now honey i am in a haste just write down your number here and see how we can get together for a lesson on how to look the part.[by now she will be smiling] and a very important getures is to bring out your pen and paper and move closer when asking for her number just dont ask for a number and stand like a tower.

More field Report soon

-Sensible Juan
 

decades

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 3, 2004
Messages
1,224
Reaction score
35
Location
sf ca
don't take this the wrong way champ but I think its performance anxiety. you see, if you don't perform with these chicks, you know it might get back to your homies and they are going to know the "secret". Ok?
out......


oh and....
 

Soma

Banned
Joined
Jun 17, 2004
Messages
499
Reaction score
0
Location
Bay Area, California
What's blocking you is subconcious peer pressure.... you are less likely to do sht because you are hesitant about rep.
That's completely on point. As retarded as it is, I'm hindered by the idea that if things don't go well between us it's going to put strain on the social circle. Like I've gotta walk a tight rope so i don't accidentally fvck her over cause then she'll talk to our friends and some will take her side and some will take mine and it ends up being a bunch of fvckin drama. Which has happened to me before and literally tore apart our circle as people chose sides.

The rep thing also kinda bothers me. In the back of my mind I don't want to become the male slut of our group. Even though everyone knows I date often, they see me pick up girls at clubs and wherever. One of the girls even asks me for advice cause she see's me getting all these girls. But in the social circle I feel like I have to keep a certain level of "respect" and integrity. Which is kinda hard cause we have so many fvckin hotties in our group. Most of the girls are models and actressess. Aye yah, hotties galore! Each week some girl in our group brings in a new friend and intros her to the rest of the group. It's like a neverending supply of hot b!tches.


Just be without attitude say what you want to say and be rude when i say be rude i mean be rude.
Yeah, you have a point. It's this mental block that is fvcking with me though. But to give it a go I started letting my real self out over the phone with this girl (same girl from last night) today. Was aggressive as I normally am and it felt good. She responded pretty well but it's nothing to write home about. Not till I fvck her anyway. Next time I have her over I'm bringing her to my room and if she down with it, we're fvcking. If not, oh well at least I know for sure and taken one step towards ridding myself of this mental thing. I'll give an update once I have her over again.


don't take this the wrong way champ but I think its performance anxiety. you see, if you don't perform with these chicks, you know it might get back to your homies and they are going to know the "secret".
No worries, no offense taken. Though that's not it. I have no performance anxiety and don't concern myself with what my friends think of my d!ck size, how long I last, or how well I perform.

Appreciate the responses.

-Soma
 

Don_Marko

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 23, 2004
Messages
352
Reaction score
1
Location
Ontario
Originally posted by Soma

The rep thing also kinda bothers me. In the back of my mind I don't want to become the male slut of our group. Even though everyone knows I date often, they see me pick up girls at clubs and wherever. One of the girls even asks me for advice cause she see's me getting all these girls. But in the social circle I feel like I have to keep a certain level of "respect" and integrity. Which is kinda hard cause we have so many fvckin hotties in our group. Most of the girls are models and actressess. Aye yah, hotties galore! Each week some girl in our group brings in a new friend and intros her to the rest of the group. It's like a neverending supply of hot b!tches.
Dude... if you can frame that it's cool that you are male slut of the group you could probabbly sleep with a lot of those fine women. Look for tactics on how to deal with player reputation.
 

Soma

Banned
Joined
Jun 17, 2004
Messages
499
Reaction score
0
Location
Bay Area, California
Some of the people in the cirlce wouldn't mind it but the majority would. Being labeled as the slut in the group guy or girl, would be bad. So I've got find a way to do it on the downlow and make sure the girls keep it on the downlow also.

This group, as I said, is mainly actresses and models and party like there's no tomorrow BUT oddly enough, they are part of a christian fellowship. Their pastor is also their manager. When I first came into this circle I figured the girls would be stuck up and need to be put in their place since they're used to being hyped up on a daily basis. I was wrong, completely. These women really are down to earth and don't have inflated egos. It totally through me for a loop. Here's something pretty funny. The best looking girl of the group is like wow, a TOTAL fvckin hottie. She recently broke with her boyfriend. I expected him to be some big, cool, badboy mofo. I met him a couple weeks ago. He's the nicest guy I've ever met. Completely average looking. Normal clothes. Nothing smooth about him. Just a genuinily nice guy. And this hottie girl is the same.

All the people in this group are like that. It's weird but in a cool way. So, as you can see, being labeled as the slut of the group would be a very negative thing. In fact, I would likely be ostracized. I don't want that cause I genuinely like these people. But that doesn't mean I don't want to fvck the girls doggystyle. Sure as hell do. But I've gotta finda way to screen these girls to make sure they keep it on the downlow and don't get pissy if I put the moves on them and run their mouth to everyone in the group.

Bleh!
 

Ricky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 9, 2002
Messages
4,035
Reaction score
769
Age
50
Interesting. I may be in a similar situation soon, but who is to say.

I think you are a little more hesitant to take what you want because it might get back to friends. If it's going well, who cares.

The biggest thing is, do you have these girls in isolation? Because if you do then you have nothing to worry about. It's one thing to put the moves on a girl when you around a big circle of friends, but when you are alone with her only you two know what happens!
 

Soma

Banned
Joined
Jun 17, 2004
Messages
499
Reaction score
0
Location
Bay Area, California
Yeah, in isolation at my house. Easy to get them interested in me. This last one was so interested after our first meeting she was all for it...wen't exactly like this...

Me: Hey, what's your schedule like this week?
Her: ( all happy and excited) Why, do you wanna hook up?!(not meaning to fvck, just meaning to get together)
Me: Yeah, we should hang out.
Her: Ok, lemme give you my number.(about to type her number into my cell but i don't have one.)
Me: I don't use cells. Write your number down.
Her: Here, I'll call your house so my number will be on your caller ID.
(Gave her the number. She left a message and on the message she gave me her cell number and house number)

So what the fvck, she's obviously into me. Went for coffee the other day, then to Barnes and Nobles to run my little date routine, then back to my house. Watched TV, got close, did a MINOR bit of touching but my fvcking mental block kept me from going further. ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH! haha

It's so funny. Cause just 5 minutes ago I drove some girl (met her a couple weeks ago at a coffee shop) back to her car. We went to eat, then walked around a lake, then back to my house, made out on the couch, took her upstairs to the guest room and got busy. Eaaaasy peasy when it's a girl from outside my social circle.

I think part of it is because if I meet some girl and bring her back to my house there is no doubt in my mind that we're gonna fvck or at least mess around. Cause why would a girl I just met come back to my house unless it's to play doctor and nurse, the naked version? But with people in my social circle I feel like there is the chance that the girl is coming back to my house because we're friends and that's what friends do. And if I'm mistaked and put the moves on her she's gonna talk to others in the group and then bam...dramaville here I come.
 

Don_Marko

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 23, 2004
Messages
352
Reaction score
1
Location
Ontario
Dude... I know where you're coming from. There was a time when i had been in exact same situation.

Girls are aware of this ambiguity, you can bet on it... also that's why they are less hesitant to be around you.

In my opinon you should keep in mind that those social circles get destroyed by time. People move, people fight and invariably there's always some sort of politics in the group. So when you really think about it, on a long enough timeline you're sure to lose these people, unless you really get close with few individuals but if they can't accept your sexual behaviour they can never be close to you. So really... you got nothing to lose by going after multiple chicks.

So it'd be a waste NOT to go after those women. Should one of them react badly I would react by saying how beautiful she is and I'd list some of her qualities and then say How am I not supposed to fall in love with a woman like that. You'll think she'll have negative feelings after like that?

Not to say this would get you laid nor that it would get you the girl. But when goes back to the ohter girls they'll make a huge soap opera about it and have "AWWW MY GOD!" type of reactions, chicks love that stuff! Meanwhile they'll probabbly try to convince this girl who you told htat you love, to hook up with you (if they like you, which it sounds like they do) and also they'll be getting much more closer to you and wonder why you didn't pick them. So you end up in a real good position...
 
Top