Fvcked up post date interaction...best way to salvage?

[EyeBRollin]

He's not communicating. The girl is probably wanting him to pleasure her and he ain't doing it. The girls like him but then he's just a crappy lover. So they go and find another guy who perhaps is a good lover.

It's good he's texting them and what he should do is tell her he wants to give her a orgasm and tell her not to fake it. That's what they want. Also call her the next day after meeting her and say he had a great time and would like to see her again.

This is the exact wrong thing to do. I recommend you brush up on the DJ Bible.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

If you did in fact send that text I recommended, now YOU are the judge, jury, and executioner. If she doesn’t reply, there is nothing more you need to know. If she does, maybe run it by us here before replying. It’s possible, though not certain, that we might have some good ideas to kick around with you.

No response as of yet as expected. F her.

 

[17 shots]

She's scared of you, she's worried that you only care about sex with her, because most of your date was kissing and hands on stuff. Yes she liked that stuff too, but that's what scares her, she doesn't want to fall victim to that without a deeper connection. She's scared of becoming just your fwb

Next time u go out with her, don't be all over her, just talk to her and act like u actually like her. She'll let her guard down after that. U can just call her too, and talk to her for a while without trying to plan anything, that'll put her mind at ease some too

 

[Atom Smasher]

She's scared of you, she's worried that you only care about sex with her, because most of your date was kissing and hands on stuff. Yes she liked that stuff too, but that's what scares her, she doesn't want to fall victim to that without a deeper connection. She's scared of becoming just your fwb

Next time u go out with her, don't be all over her, just talk to her and act like u actually like her. She'll let her guard down after that. U can just call her too, and talk to her for a while without trying to plan anything, that'll put her mind at ease some too

I do think most men get the sexual vibe going way too early on dates. If one is looking for a relationship, you’re more likely to turn her off with the sexual stuff than on.

Women need a bit of time to grow into you and to let down their guard. They want to know you have an actual interest in them and aren’t looking for a pump and dump. In my opinion, the best strategy is to take them out a few times and build up sexual tension in the meantime.

Women tend to hate overt sexual jokes, implications and too much touching at first. They see these things as crass and not being socially calibrated. Most of them will give it up after 2 or 3 dates.

Again, I’m speaking about girlfriend material here. One nighters (something I consider to be an exercise in dissipation) are another story.

 

[Lookatu]

I do think most men get the sexual vibe going way too early on dates. If one is looking for a relationship, you’re more likely to turn her off with the sexual stuff than on.

Women need a bit of time to grow into you and to let down their guard. They want to know you have an actual interest in them and aren’t looking for a pump and dump. In my opinion, the best strategy is to take them out a few times and build up sexual tension in the meantime.

Women tend to hate overt sexual jokes, implications and too much touching at first. They see these things as crass and not being socially calibrated. Most of them will give it up after 2 or 3 dates.

Again, I’m speaking about girlfriend material here. One nighters (something I consider to be an exercise in dissipation) are another story.

I fully agree on this.
Especially now a days more than ever.
In talking to girls about dating, especially in regards to OLD, almost all of them(more relationship oriented) wonder if the guy just wants them for sex. This is the biggest question that girls have the most on their minds on a first date. If you manage to squash that notion, they are more likely to go out with you again and have their guard down a bit.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

UPDATE:

Met up with another new woman today. Date went well...some sexual talk, teased her but didn't touch much...she kino'd me several times...at end of the date she kissed me before I could do anything amd asked if we could do this again soon...

Guess I have another plate getting ready to join the team...

Another date tomorrow...see if I can keep this going...

 

[StacksHitEmUp]

Here we go again...had what I thought was a great first date, made out multiple times, grabbing each other's asses, she grabbed and held my hand for a long time as we walked...she initiated the kiss at the end of the date and told me how much fun she had...

So I call her a few days later(she didn't text at all...bad sign) banter for a few minutes and then ask her out again and she tells me "I am not sure I was 100% feeling it but I also don't want to say no either. I kind of wanted to take things slow but obviously that didn't happen."

Instead of remaining cool and joking with her about it, in the heat of the moment as a quick reaction I blurted out "well you must have been feeling something to make out with me 4 separate times." and then she got defensive a little but we ended up making plans for Wednesday.

I sent her a text after joking that if I was too fun and exciting to be around that she could always go find someone who she could go on a dinner interview with(inside joke... we talked about how we hated dinner interview dates). No response.

Best way to salvage this? I almost want to cancel the date because I believe she is going to cancel regardless and at least this way would show I have some pullback. Or send her a text saying that I acted a little ridiculous Saturday and that of course we can take things slower.(Not in acton just in words of course)

Thoughts? My continual issue is I have trouble dealing with instant reaction things like this. I need to figure out a way to do better in the moment when these things happen.

I have a full slate of dates again with new women this week. But I am tired of going on first dates that don't lead to anything. I am phenomenal at getting women to meet up, have gotten makeouts the last 3 dates, but no second dates with all the women giving me some version of "not 100% feeling it"/"not enough spark"...

Didn't read the entire thread to be honest but don't push her. If she pulls back and is hesitant, you pull back because you are the MAN and she's lucky to be chosen by you. Don't cancel, just let it play out. You get stood up, so what? Go into the city and get another one. And don't overanalyse, I had a women not text me after I ****ed her on date one once until i texted her four days later and she was over the moon I reached out because she was waiting for me to text.

 

[Mazer]

Don’t bother analyzing these bishes. Some will be into you, others won’t. If you have had success with the ladies in the last few years then I wouldn’t worry. You can ask yourself, what’s different about the way you interact with these women compared to last year?
In the beginning, my first couple of dates were always the same, same topics of conversation, it was basically a well rehearsed script. I kept the material that worked and threw out the stuff that didn’t. Now, I am a bit more laid back, just shoot from the hip, if the woman doesn’t like it, she can kick rocks because I got 3-4 other plates going. The point is, you learn what types of behavior and “conversation” gets you a second and third date. Good luck

 

[StacksHitEmUp]

Don’t bother analyzing these bishes. Some will be into you, others won’t. If you have had success with the ladies in the last few years then I wouldn’t worry. You can ask yourself, what’s different about the way you interact with these women compared to last year?
In the beginning, my first couple of dates were always the same, same topics of conversation, it was basically a well rehearsed script. I kept the material that worked and threw out the stuff that didn’t. Now, I am a bit more laid back, just shoot from the hip, if the woman doesn’t like it, she can kick rocks because I got 3-4 other plates going. The point is, you learn what types of behavior and “conversation” gets you a second and third date. Good luck

This man speaking straight facts. Just be cool and confident, women pick up your vibe easily and if you carry the "I dont give a ****" vibe they will be drawn to you because majority of men are drooling idiots nowadays.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Cool man. Let us know how the post date goes. What you do different and the result.
I think you got some great advice in this thread. Good luck

Agreed. I need to just settle down in date and post date. I think I may be coming off a little desperate in their eyes. IMHO, I am not hot enough at this point to go overtly sexual in that way with women(3 years ago in peak shape I got a LOT of action on first dates...handjobs and BJs in the car after first dates was like the norm at one point)...I need to show some sexuality but also let them see my other qualities like being fun and playful so they focus on those rather than "is this guy hot enough to just bang right away", which mostly will be no(gotta be real with myself).

Which isn't to say I can't still get and bang hot women because I typically do pretty decent in that regard, just have to get them hooked in a different way. Gotta be real about your strengths and weaknesses and not pretend they don't matter.

 

[EyeBRollin]

UPDATE:

Met up with another new woman today. Date went well...some sexual talk, teased her but didn't touch much...she kino'd me several times...at end of the date she kissed me before I could do anything amd asked if we could do this again soon...

Guess I have another plate getting ready to join the team...

Another date tomorrow...see if I can keep this going...

Did you lock in the next date with her right there? (Did you close?)