Frustrations of club game

[anonymous12345]

I don’t want to sound black-pilled but there’s some realities to face here. From Sweden I have the experience that club game consists of:

• Youngsters being tired/drunk/etc.
• People nurturing social circles/status
• Males out-numbering is common
• Girl groups just want to dance and sing-along
• A HB is approached by plenty, nothing is of interest. A far is someone taking it cool (such as me), she finds it enticing, smiles. If that person approaches he’s like the rest and she will reject. She won’t approach. So nothing happens. She goes home, perhaps wonders who that guy was.
• ****-block by ugly friend is standard. Her friend is having a conversation with someone (me) and ugly pulls her away. It’s rude, destructive and dumb.
• Girls running around like confused chickens

On the upside, there’s the rare girls that appreciate and have the capability to relate to men, they get landed quickly.

Aside, those who succeed, in contrast got keys.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

Oh man you did not even cover the:

• Loud music that makes your ears bleed
• Crappy music you have to be drunk to enjoy
• Dudes ready to fight on a moment's notice
• Usually rude staff due to the hectic night
• Overpriced drinks if you do want to get one to deal with the loud music
• Long lines for the bathroom and god forbid you need to take a sh*t
• The fact that nightlife does not start until real late
• The fact that your next morning is wrecked in most cases since you sleep in

I have more or less transitioned out of nightlife. I might go every now and then but I find it a chore. The only appeal is the same night lays but at what costs? Having to lose my hearing to crappy music and having to deal with drunk, drugged up, and emotionally fragile people who sometimes have nothing to lose? Forget it.

 

[jaymbrs]

I find it's best in a club scene to approach a group of females with 2 - 3 male friends. Mingle as a group, close in on the one you want, go from there. The idea is to shrink the environment to better your odds.

 

[SW15]

Wheat Waffles summarizes nightlife game well.

 

[handle]

I don't advise going to clubs at all unless you have a genuine interest in the event or you are there with a big crew of friends (which is, in a roudabout way, the same as being interested in the event). Otherwise they are a terrible place to meet people. The same applies to many social settings, but clubs are especially bad for the reasons you mentioned.
I can meet women easily at certain types of house or techno shows because I like the music and I like the scene. It's hard not to meet cool people at such an event because we have a shared niche interest.

 

[RazorRambo24]

lol man i cant even remember if i ever thought like this. been in the nightlife so long.. it only gets better man, all these things are like mere obstacles/challenges when you start anything new.. you feel overwhelmed.. but when you learn to navigate and get used to all these things, as well as find what the best clubs are to go to, its alot of fun.

under the lights of the nightclubs will forever be where I feel most comfortable..

 

[SW15]

Online dating basically killed club game. Women aren't there to meet people anymore, they're there for an excuse to dress up and drink. She already has several numbers in her phone to hit up when the night is over.

At 1:44 in the Wheat Waffles video I posted above, Wheat Waffles said that one night stands from nightclubs are redundant now due to online dating. There is a growing consensus on the lack of usefulness of night game.

From 1:09 - 1:49, Wheat Waffles covers the reasons why women go to nightclubs now. None of the reasons involve finding meaningful dating arrangement. The best case scenarios are one night stands and short term casual sex.

Consider the 2018 book "Game" by Roosh. In the book, Roosh mentions how much more difficult it had become by the late 2010s to arrange a first date from a nightlife venue (bar or nightclub) interaction. Night game was most useful for getting the same night lay.

Return of Kings had an article from 2016 entitled "Why The Era Of Meeting Girls In Nightclubs Is Coming To An End"

Why The Era Of Meeting Girls In Nightclubs Is Coming To An End

A lot of the things you mentioned pre-date online dating and it has always been very competitive, but a lot of people still paired off at the end of the night.

Going out to nightlife venues from 1975-2005 was difficult for most men doing it during parts of that 30 year era. I turned 21 in 2004, so I caught the tail end of that frame.

Nightlife has always been game on hard mode. Online dating was created in the 1990s as a workaround for the difficulties of nightlife game. I think a lot of people now forget that origin of the online dating websites.

When online dating either didn't exist or was highly stigmatized (1975-2005), women took it more seriously. In the 1975-2005 era, plenty of women didn't need nightlife venues as they had social circle options or some other non-bar options. While today it's possible for women to have non-bar options, women can have far more options on swipe apps or in the DMs on Instagram than they would ever get through real life methods.

The only reason now for a woman to do any sort of real life game is if she's frustrated with what's going on in her swipe queue or in her DMs. The quantity of options via the swipe apps and the DMs is immense. It's overwhelming for a lot of women.

 

[SW15]

As bad as night game was even at its most bountiful point, it was STILL better than online. I never had the skillset for it. Im talking about striking out 18 out of 20 times going out was better than online dating is today. And in my view, its still often better. That's the amazing thing.

Nightlife game in 2004-2006 was better than online dating websites in 2004-2006.

Nightlife game is tough for a lot of reasons and some people don't have the personality or skill set for it. In my late 20s, I made the decision to focus more on non-bar methods for meeting women as compared to focusing on nightlife.

I'd still choose nightlife over online if those were my only 2 choices. Even though I have spent the last ~10 years focused on daygame, daygame is a less than ideal method of meeting women. Social circle is the easiest in the short to medium term but lacks sustainability long term, even for men who prefer extended relationships. Most social circles have a blue pill ideology about romantic interactions and they tend to get pissed at men who are either serial monogamists or players.

Will The Only Form Of Game To Survive The Future Be Day Game?

Roosh wrote in February 2016 that he believed the future of game was in daygame and social circles. We're 7 years now past when he wrote that article. Time to examine if he was correct?

 

[ChesapeakeBoy2000]

lol man i cant even remember if i ever thought like this. been in the nightlife so long.. it only gets better man, all these things are like mere obstacles/challenges when you start anything new.. you feel overwhelmed.. but when you learn to navigate and get used to all these things, as well as find what the best clubs are to go to, its alot of fun.

under the lights of the nightclubs will forever be where I feel most comfortable..

I feel like a lot of these people have minimal experience in clubs or none at all, also some people on here have done no cold approaching but will quickly give their worthless opinion on the matter. People will look for any excuse to not get out there and get rejected these days. After taking a few months off of cold approaching it took me 5 or 6 times going out before I could back in the swing of things and actually be successful again and get laid from bars and clubs.

 

[RazorRambo24]

I feel like a lot of these people have minimal experience in clubs or none at all, also some people on here have done no cold approaching but will quickly give their worthless opinion on the matter. People will look for any excuse to not get out there and get rejected these days. After taking a few months off of cold approaching it took me 5 or 6 times going out before I could back in the swing of things and actually be successful again and get laid from bars and clubs.

Man I'll be the first to tell you, I think the vast majority of this forum are not really living like players. And quite frankly way too many incels, just judging based on the things I read/have read. Its alot of men who are clueless about women but still love to talk about them. and yes, I dont think too many people on here go clubbing sadly.. I still do after more than a decade of clubbing on and off lol

as far aas cold approach, some of the guys on here sitll go, but it seems like no one has "figured it out".. To me approach is just fun at this point.. I dont even need to approach women anymore but I still do.. i mean what else you going to do at the club besides dance and drink ? My friends arent the type to go and have conversations ill tell u that much lol. It's like we'll talk a bare minimum but after maybe 2-3 drinks we're jus game time..

For me the biggest thing im learning to take pride in is not any of my own success but knowing that the people around me have in some way or another improved due to going out together and jus doing our thing

 

[anonymous12345]

I agree with the clubbers. Even though I'm 38 I enjoy the night life, the drinks, music, atmosphere, etc. So the clubs are some of the venues I visit, apart from the comparably more nerdy social dance hobbies for instance.

@Jesse Pinkman focus a lot on more or less the logistics, and although I agree they're annoying they are for me not more than that. I could easily accept them if I had results.

I'm more interested in solving the social/game dynamics, as mentioned in the first post.

For me: OLD doesn't work, day game is a grind with poor statistics (like for many), and getting laid from club game doesn't work. Keeping my head cold here.

 

[Bingo-Player]

In my local area you can practically forget about approaching any girls in groups of more than 3 these days

There's just too much bad attitude especially groups of HB 7,8/9's who are dressed up to the nines with faces full of makeup , i tend to avoid these types now because they will either be rude or just waste your time (and money if you let them )

For night game You HAVE to target the girls in the 1's and 2's and you need a decent wingman who can stop the friend from c0ckblocking you

Generally if you approach these small sets you will know within 10 mins wether they want you to stick around or not

Don't be try hard , don't be creepy and don't be too ****y

Just a basic "hey girls you look like your having fun over here do you mind if we join you !?!"


It has gotten harder out there , there's no doubt about it BUT it can still be done you just need to be efficient and clinical

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Oh man you did not even cover the:

• Loud music that makes your ears bleed
• Crappy music you have to be drunk to enjoy
• Dudes ready to fight on a moment's notice
• Usually rude staff due to the hectic night
• Overpriced drinks if you do want to get one to deal with the loud music
• Long lines for the bathroom and god forbid you need to take a sh*t
• The fact that nightlife does not start until real late
• The fact that your next morning is wrecked in most cases since you sleep in

I have more or less transitioned out of nightlife. I might go every now and then but I find it a chore. The only appeal is the same night lays but at what costs? Having to lose my hearing to crappy music and having to deal with drunk, drugged up, and emotionally fragile people who sometimes have nothing to lose? Forget it.

If you are going to clubs that play crappy music you should go to a different club.

Come on bro...you say you live in Miami and NYC and can't find a good club to go to? I call BS.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Online dating basically killed club game. Women aren't there to meet people anymore, they're there for an excuse to dress up and drink. She already has several numbers in her phone to hit up when the night is over.

A lot of the things you mentioned pre-date online dating and it has always been very competitive, but a lot of people still paired off at the end of the night.

I find this highly unlikely. Women are human and they enjoy drinking also. If you want a social person you will go out and find someone. Introverts possibly found their better Avenue, but did you want that anyway if you’re the club type? If anything, your pool is so much better curated at the club now than it’s been. Someone you’ll vibe with. More vibes more sex.

I would actually also argue that OLD is more polluted against the introvert, since extroverts also do OLD but don’t typically love it.

 

[Divorced w 3]

what do you mean by "you find this highly unlikely." Meaning you're speculating?

I mean I personally would call it more a hypothesis based on personal research.

 

[sangheilios]

It's pretty well understood that nightclubs aren't really a great place for meeting women lol. As you mentioned, most women are there to drink with their friends and have a good time, not to meet men. The overall environment and atmosphere is just not conducive to interacting with women. Some obvious variables are how loud and crowded most of these venues are, which makes even basic conversation incredibly difficult. Most women aren't there by themselves and have at least another person else accompanying them, though they often are in groups that are pretty good sized. It's very likely that someone else in the group will thwart your efforts, why they do this I really don't fully understand. Then you need to factor in the sheer amount of social skill/confidence it would take in order to approach a large group of people by yourself, this is not at all an easy feat and more often than not will turn out well. Then when you factor all of this out you need to actually get the women's attention and get her to like you lol, which is an entirely different issue in itself.

Overall, nightlife "game" is incredibly difficult and will have a very low success rate for men overall. I'd also add that if a man does not have a lot of experience or is trying to build up his confidence with approaching women that this is not at all a good place. It wouldn't be unusual to have really rough rejections in an environment like this, either from the woman herself or her entourage. I'd honestly say that for an inexperienced man that is developing his confidence this could honestly be more detrimental than anything. It's one of those scenarios that is quite honestly completely unrealistic, "how do I approach this attractive woman at a restaurant when she is there with 10 other people?". The answer, you don't lol because there is zero opportunity for you to do so.

 

[SW15]

It's pretty well understood that nightclubs aren't really a great place for meeting women lol. As you mentioned, most women are there to drink with their friends and have a good time, not to meet men. The overall environment and atmosphere is just not conducive to interacting with women.

In the 4th post of this thread, I posted a video from Wheat Waffles about nightclub. 1:09-1:49 in that video explains why women go to nightclubs. The Wheat Waffles commentary supports your point.

Some obvious variables are how loud and crowded most of these venues are, which makes even basic conversation incredibly difficult.

In nightclubs, verbal game isn't meaningful. Some regular bars are noisy enough that a verbal approach isn't going to go anywhere. If your game relies on some element of speaking (which is true for a lot of men), there's a need to select a quieter venue.

Most women aren't there by themselves and have at least another person else accompanying them, though they often are in groups that are pretty good sized. It's very likely that someone else in the group will thwart your efforts, why they do this I really don't fully understand.

Most nightlife venue game requires you to have at least one other person with you. It's possible to do solo game at a nightlife venue. I have done it. Having at least one other person with you helps with approaching. Roosh once had a philosophy that women in groups of more than 3 were not serious about meeting men while out at nightlife venues. Mystery Method was ok with approaching larger groups. I think groups of 3 or less are better.

Then you need to factor in the sheer amount of social skill/confidence it would take in order to approach a large group of people by yourself, this is not at all an easy feat and more often than not will turn out well. Then when you factor all of this out you need to actually get the women's attention and get her to like you lol, which is an entirely different issue in itself.

Most solo guys aren't going to be able to approach a group of more than 3 women. It's possible to approach a group of 3 if you're out solo as you converse with one woman and the other 2 women talk to each other. A solo guy could also approach 2 women.

Overall, nightlife "game" is incredibly difficult and will have a very low success rate for men overall. I'd also add that if a man does not have a lot of experience or is trying to build up his confidence with approaching women that this is not at all a good place. It wouldn't be unusual to have really rough rejections in an environment like this, either from the woman herself or her entourage. I'd honestly say that for an inexperienced man that is developing his confidence this could honestly be more detrimental than anything. It's one of those scenarios that is quite honestly completely unrealistic, "how do I approach this attractive woman at a restaurant when she is there with 10 other people?". The answer, you don't lol because there is zero opportunity for you to do so.

This is accurate.

 

[patb]

The rate of return is horrible. But, it can help you retain a sense of agency when the dating apps aren't going your way (even if it's somewhat illusory). If night game isn't on the table, then not having dates lined up for the weekend is a minor catastrophe.

 

[shwami_salami]

Yea my friend, club game is crazy. Key word: chaos. Still do-able but gotta like spam approach the heck atta that place. When one lands, yea its like a hookup almost. Daygame is just much more relaxing, she is by herself, and so on. And I couldn't imagine paying a cover charge haha.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

If you are a guy doing occasional nightclub game ya you are not going to have much success unless you are handsome enough that girls approach you.

You can still practice approaching and conversation skills but night game is more caveman game. Meaning: You need to have a compelling look and or presence, you need to be very direct and succinct in communication, you need to have a sexy vibe or a social ease about you (preferably both) so that your advances are rewarded.

If you don’t have the guts to go tell a girl to do something in a command form “I want you to kiss me”…”Come dance”….hand her your phone & say “Put your contacts in….” Or something even more bold, then yeah, you’re going to founder in the nightclubs.

To do the above you MUST learn to read people well. Interest signals are subtle & if you miss them you’ll be just throwing mud on the wall to see what sticks.

One way to get experienced in the nightclub game is go and become a regular. Become part of the “cool” people who go there. There will be women who go frequently, I was one. Yes I had the advantage of being female and hot (granted a big advantage) but I knew all the other cool people who circulated around (who were not all great looking although many were)….and I knew the staff and the bartenders and the owners. Then you’re pre-vetted and people will talk to you if you are a regular. That’s true anywhere and once you establish that it has some transferable qualities if you change areas or go visit elsewhere.

The best clubs are kind of like the pro venues in nightlife. You need to know how to navigate the environment. Stumbling around blindly approaching like a bunch of school boys doesn’t yield results. Knowing how to operate in the club will get you consistent results. But people need to be curious about you; you need to stand out in some way.

But if you really can’t stand the venue? That will be reflected in your vibe, and that will put girls off.