Friendship Zone?

[SnoopDoggyCow]

I am scared to make friends with attractive girls I see because I don't want to get stuck in the friend zone.

So I dont end up doing anything and nothing happens.


What is the real truth about the friendzone? Can you make friends first, then turn it romantically???


experts please advise

 

[Climax]

hmmm...

Look... no matter WHO the girl is, you will HAVE to become friendly with her before anything.... Now the key here is the vibes that you give her and the amount of time that u take....

Let me explain...

Lets say you and your buddies are at the mall and you see this very attractive girl... so you approach her, start talking and introdusing yourself etc, and then afer a brief conversation ( u must make it brief) you get her number and walk away. Now the following day/night u phone her and ask her is she wants to do something with you, and she SHOULD say yes and then u make arrangements, you meet up, and you get to know eachother etc... Now when u are with her u need to flirt and use body language and kino (touching) to seperate it from being a "friendly" date to a "romantic" date. trust me... its not hard at al to seperate the "friend" zone and the "romantic" zone.

Now if this is a girl lets say in your school.... then things work practically the same... You go up to her, get to know her abit, get her number, make arrangements with her, and do the same as you would do with a girl that u have JUST met.

And if you just have on eof those personalities where you give the girl the impression that all you want is her friendship, then i suggest u read the bible and some articles on the sosuave and learn how do "seduce" women. You need to be in touch with your romantic side, and not be scared of doing romantic things with a girl, and flirting is what i think your problem is, so u need to learn how to flirt properly.

You might think that its something that is just too hard, and u might think that you just dont have the confidence to flirt with a girl and be open and in touch with your romantic side, but i garantee you that the more you practice at it, the easiyer it will become, till it will become second nature for you. I'll use myself as en example here... I am in a LTR ( Long Term Relationship) at the moment and when i go places with my girl and we meet new people (girls) and i talk to htem i tend to flirt with them withoiut even trying to, and this emmediatlly creates sexual desire in her for me... and let me tell you, my chick sometimes gets REALLY annoyed with this, but what i am trying to say here, is that i have had so much practice that its become 2nd nature for me, as it will to you with practice.

Well thats about all i have to say for now... so goodluck for the future, and i hope to hear of positive feedback from you in the NEAR future

Laterz...

 

[SnoopDoggyCow]

Thanks for the advice. Lets say I try flirting and the girl is not interested. Or even if she is. Can i remain friends?

 

[Fenderules]

yeah, just act afc and she wont want to **** you!

 

[MixMaxster]

what if the girl has a bf and is the one using kino on you? lol

 

[DeathDealer]

don't worry if they make you into friends. did you know that girls who like yuo don't care if you are afc or not? just as long as you dno't act desperate you're fine.

 

[Climax]

either she is.. or she isnt.... and there is nothing wrong with friendship!

Originally posted by SnoopDoggyCow
Thanks for the advice. Lets say I try flirting and the girl is not interested. Or even if she is. Can i remain friends?

Wait... What are u asking here? in your previous post you said that u DONT WANT THEM TO GET INTO THE FRIENDS ZONE

SnoopDoggyCow said:

I am scared to make friends with attractive girls I see because I don't want to get stuck in the friend zone.

and now u are saying:

Lets say I try flirting and the girl is not interested. Or even if she is. Can i remain friends?

I dont fully understand what you are trying to say.... But I'll answer from what i think i understand...

If this girl doesnt seem to be interested in you sexualy, thenbecoming friendly with her will bring no harm, and them maybe u can meet her friends and get with them... or even if u dont meet her friends, ur making a new friend which happens to be an attractive girl... no harm in that!

If you flirt with the girl and you dont get any flirting back, and you only get signs from her that she wants to be friends, then either she is tooSHY to flirt back, or she just isnt attracted to you sexually. If she is shy then you need to let her become comfortable with you and THEN see if her "real" feelings and/or "attraction for you come out, and if not, then its not a big deal at all, you just made yourself a hot girl friend. There are plenty of other girls out there for you to flirt with and become sexually attracted to eachother, so dont make a big deal over 1 single girl, ever! And just for the record...


SnoopDoggyCow said:

What is the real truth about the friendzone? Can you make friends first, then turn it romantically???

The answer to that is YES, and a Romantic relationship that evolves from a Friendship is normally the most successfull relationship and are the ones that end up lasting and maybe even end up in marrige ( i have seen it happen before ) I'm guessing that the reason for this is because of the fact that all the trust is already there, and trust is one of the hardest things to fully develop for another person. So dont be scared of becoming friendly with a girl, u have nothing to loose, even if after u are friends with her she isnt attracted to you sexually, you still got her friendship, so you win either way if you think about it.

Well, i hope this helped...

Laterz...

 

[SnoopDoggyCow]

Thanks for the advice man.

I guess what I really mean is this

I am scared of becoming friends with a girl because of what everyone on this board says about getting caught in the friend zone.

But lets say I do become friends with a girl who I have feelings for.

Lets say 1 day I lay my feelings out there on the line, and she doesn't feel the same way. Will this cause problems in our friendship because she now realizes I am interested in her:

I guess the point is to make your feelings shown early, that way you can tell if the girl is interested or not, and don't waste time.

But like you said, becoming a girl's friend builds her trust in you, so maybe its a good investment?

 

[Dukester]

what is a relationship? it's nothing more than a strong friendship. of course you gotta be friends with her before you can "date" her.

there are ways out of the friend zone. and there are differences to LJBF vs. being friends before you date.

ex. i've been friends with this girl for 2 years, and we are close as h ell, really strong friendship.

they say sex and that sorta thing screws relationships like that up. it doesnt. she wants to loose her virginity to me, and we mess around as it it.

so friends then relationship. if ya talking about the friend zone, read the bible

 

[Tha Realnezz]

I think my IQ just dropped from reading this post.

You're afraid to be freinds with women cuz they might wanna be freinds with you?

You can be freinds with them and still lay them down.You need to learn to when is the right time cut the crap and make sure to let her know your intentions from the get,and know when to make your move.

Don't ever hang out with the b/f untill your spot is secure.Don't listen to the boyfreind troubles either..ever.

There's nothing wrong with being freinds with ugly chics either cuz they have friends too and are usually more loyal than men.

They don't call ugly women dogs for no reason.Why do you think ugly chics all get married?Cuz they do what they 'sposed to.

I'm being very serious too. I don't fvck them but I be-freind them.

 

[SnoopDoggyCow]

Ok here is what I am getting at, and I'll use an example.

There was this hot chick I used to work with. I was very attracted to her, but she also had a great personality, not to metion a boyfriend.

So I decided since I valued her as a friend, I would be her buddy, so we would talk a lot, and she'd tell me about her life, her boyfriend troubles sometimes etc...

Everything the DJ Bible says you shouldnt do right?

My thing was that I didn't want to hit on her, because I didn't want things to be uncomfortable between us because I value her friendship, and I still do.

So what I'm asking is, should I have hit on her, or made a move, and even if I got shot down, could I still have a good friendship with her?

Or would this make things uncomfortable between us like I thought it might because she would know I was attracted to her, and might not trust my intentions???

NEED FEEDBACK!!!!

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by SnoopDoggyCow
I am scared to make friends with attractive girls I see because I don't want to get stuck in the friend zone.

So I dont end up doing anything and nothing happens.


What is the real truth about the friendzone? Can you make friends first, then turn it romantically???


experts please advise

As long as you don't act asexual and make sure the friendship has a bit of a "sexual charge" to it (sexual tension) then you can easily go from friend to more. Just don't act like you only want to be friends from the get go when you really want more and you'll be fine. That doesn't mean the girls will be interested back...but if you don't hide your intentions you won't be wasting time and energy on nothing.

 

[SnoopDoggyCow]

bump

 

[Don Juanabbe]

Originally posted by SnoopDoggyCow
I am scared to make friends with attractive girls I see because I don't want to get stuck in the friend zone.

So I dont end up doing anything and nothing happens.


What is the real truth about the friendzone? Can you make friends first, then turn it romantically???


experts please advise

Yes you CAN make friends with a girl AND stay out of the friendship zone. But you need to keep it an arms-length acquaintence - no talking too much about her emotional issues unless you are just doing listening and nodding, no brotherly type advice. Always remain detached and aloof, like you really couldn't give a sh*t one way or the other.

Heavy eye contact and some kino, but DON'T make it look like you are hitting on her.

Come and go as you please.

You have to learn to walk the line with this stuff.

You also need to keep women off balance at ALL times - make her wonder whether you are interested in her in THAT way at ALL times. This will slowly drive them crazy.

Hell, I've put THEM in the friendship zone from the get-go and this works like a charm.

Ask alot about them, reveal little about yourself.

Generate enough attraction and she'll jump you. But you have to be sly and on the ball at all times - adopt the attitude that you can have this girl any time you want, and you will project that in your behaviour. Assume that every woman is interested in you. It works.

NO COMPLIMENTS. VERY LITTLE FLIRTING, aside from eye contact (Eye contact is the most important for generating THAT feeling in her) and kino. If you are going to flirt, keep it light, like you don't really give a sh*t, personally, I don't flirt much.

When you're looking at her, make sure you do it in a manner that you COULD be checking her out.

 

[SnoopDoggyCow]

I hear you. I guess what Im saying is this

I would like to be friends with girls, but always have the possiblity of hooking up with them.

Is this possible?

Also someone please give me advice on the above reply regarding the girl I used to work with.

 

[SnoopDoggyCow]

bump

 

[SnoopDoggyCow]

snoop doggy cow

 

[sfalexi]

I am scared to make friends with attractive girls I see because I don't want to get stuck in the friend zone.

So I dont end up doing anything and nothing happens.

Well if you do nothing, you get nothing. If you talk to them and go out with them, at least the POSSIBILITY is there.

Let's say you meet a girl and go out with her. You don't know what 'zone' you're in, but you seem to be having a good time. Wonderful.

Let's say she says, "Wow. You're a really great friend." Now it's clear. In which case you either move on, or keep her on the back burner for nights when you're bored and don't feel like going out. It might be worth still hanging out with her if she seems to have a lot of female friends. Cause maybe you'll get along with one of them and THAT will turn into something. If she doesn't, then pick up your pride and leave.

The one mistake that too many guys keep doing is that once they're friend-zoned, they continue going out with her and ONLY her hoping to get out of it. Maybe they will get out of it, but DO NOT, and I repeat, DO NOT stop looking elsewhere for a relationship/screw/whatever it is you're looking for due to the girl who's a 'really great friend'. Once you hear those words, she becomes a 'backup' to any other possibilities around.

And if she tries to talk to you and make you feel bad about blowing her off to go out with someone or somewhere, calmly say, "No offense, but we're friends. You said so yourself. So I'm going to keep looking for someone who wants more than that, and I'm not gonna lose that opportunity for someone who I know that I clearly won't be more than friends with."

Alexi

 

[becker]

Be careful, the girl I'm dating now started off with all the "friends" talk. She would say "Oh, I'm glad we're all friends" and stuff like that when she'd hang out with us, but I could see that she was clearly attracted to me as more than that. I made my move, and she didn't pull back. Had I gone by what most people seem to be suggesting on this board, I would have missed out on the opportunity.

Bottom line is, try to read her interest level. If she's finding excuses to be around you, and responds positively to your suggestions to do stuff together, and she calls you, but still refers to you as a "friend", you can bet your arse that she would be open to doing more. This is field tested by me, so you can rest assured that I'm not just theorizing here. This actually happened to me more than once.

 

[sfalexi]

Be careful, the girl I'm dating now started off with all the "friends" talk. She would say "Oh, I'm glad we're all friends" and stuff like that when she'd hang out with us, but I could see that she was clearly attracted to me as more than that. I made my move, and she didn't pull back. Had I gone by what most people seem to be suggesting on this board, I would have missed out on the opportunity.

True. It DOES happen out there. Just don't pass up another possible girl because you HOPE that your 'friend' will eventually come around. It's fine to continue pursuing, but don't put all your eggs into one basket. ESPECIALLY if that basket is labeled "friend".