Friend who is successful with women telling me what I do is BS

[montybrown]

I was talking to him about how I went to dinner and I left the bill on the table while I finished up eating, and how my date looked at the bill and then I took it from her and I took out a $10 bill (the bill was about $10) but then she took out a $5 and wanted to pay for her half. Now he said I screwed up because she'll think of me as "cheap". I told him that I didn't MIND paying for anything but I was concerned that if I did pay for everything, I didn't want her to think that that's all I will do and she will use me for my money.

He also said that Women are above us and they will bring themselves down to our level to be with us. Thinking that us Men are the Prize will do nothing but leave us sitting at home and jacking off. Because the woman that we try to get can get ANY GUY she wants and fvck anyone she wants too. It's US that wants a particular girl, and there will ALWAYS be another guy better than us. Whether if he has a better body, if he looks better than us, Smarter than us, etc. So for us thinking highly/****y of ourselves and "un-interested" will only make her move to any other guy she chooses to be.

Then I mentioned about talking on the phone. How I only want to be on the phone for 10 minutes tops because I have better things to do. He says "Right, so while you only talk on the phone for 10 minutes, she'll talk to another guy longer, get to know him better and when you call the next day she'll blow you off because she already got to know another guy and her guard is dropped and will want to spend time with him rather then some stranger she's only met and talked to for 10 minutes."

What are your thoughts about all this? Is he just an AFC or what?

 

[DonJoseCantosie]

I was talking to him about how I went to dinner and I left the bill on the table while I finished up eating, and how my date looked at the bill and then I took it from her and I took out a $10 bill (the bill was about $10) but then she took out a $5 and wanted to pay for her half. Now he said I screwed up because she'll think of me as "cheap". I told him that I didn't MIND paying for anything but I was concerned that if I did pay for everything, I didn't want her to think that that's all I will do and she will use me for my money.

He also said that Women are above us and they will bring themselves down to our level to be with us. Thinking that us Men are the Prize will do nothing but leave us sitting at home and jacking off. Because the woman that we try to get can get ANY GUY she wants and fvck anyone she wants too. It's US that wants a particular girl, and there will ALWAYS be another guy better than us. Whether if he has a better body, if he looks better than us, Smarter than us, etc. So for us thinking highly/****y of ourselves and "un-interested" will only make her move to any other guy she chooses to be.

Then I mentioned about talking on the phone. How I only want to be on the phone for 10 minutes tops because I have better things to do. He says "Right, so while you only talk on the phone for 10 minutes, she'll talk to another guy longer, get to know him better and when you call the next day she'll blow you off because she already got to know another guy and her guard is dropped and will want to spend time with him rather then some stranger she's only met and talked to for 10 minutes."

What are your thoughts about all this? Is he just an AFC or what?

You're friend is an AFC...hands down. No question. Woman are at most our equals. We don't have to peg her down to our level. We already are, we just have to believe it. She wants a guy thats "above" her u could say. We are the prize, not her. Too many guys put her as the prize when in fact its supposed to be us. Why else would girls go for a guy thats great with women? He's the prize. In terms of the dinner, its her choice to pay or not. You already payed, she put her money in for it. Ur not cheap at all period.

But about the statement of Women can get any guy they want, if this were true...then why are a good portion not be happy in the relationships unsatisfied and are pretty insecure? That tells u something. Women sometimes don't got the guy they TRULY want. I'm talking financial and sexual.

Also, realize who ur listening to. Is ur guy VERY good with women? If not...then u definitely know he's full of crap.

 

[KontrollerX]

A woman that would think of you as cheap wouldn't be worth your time anyway.

I mean is she interested in your money or you?

See your friend is full of sh!t.

He may get chicks using his methods but they will be chicks who...

1. Only value him for his money
2. Chicks who can have a lot of fun using him as an emotional tampon since he'll stay on the phone with them for five hours while other guys won't. Perfect lead in to the eventual talk of "well we talked so much I've come to think of you as a friend."
3. Chicks who he will let on in one way or another that she is better than he is which inevitably leads to him getting walked all over and dropped when she finds a real man.

Could he have a semi decent relationship with some chick out there using his methods?

Sure but is the chick going to be what he really wants or is she going to be what he thinks he can get?

Thats the problem.

Your friend's mindset is ultimately flawed because its self defeating.

To him women are the prize not him, to him women who he just met don't have to pay their fair share and to him women deserve to get as much time on the phone with him as they want.

No boundaries because the guy doesn't think he's worth more or even equal to women.

Pathetic.

 

[DonJoseCantosie]

Thank you Kontroller u said it perfectly!

 

[War Against Betaism]

You said your friend is successful? Is he more successful than you? I have a friend who literally has models going up to him at clubs and parties and giving him their phone numbers. In fact, he just finished up telling me a story about how he just finished up a 4 hour conversation over the phone with a model. I never spend more than 20 minutes on a phone with a girl and have never gotten a hint of interest from the type of girls that he's pulling.

 

[Tha Realnezz]

BS he's succesful by way of sympery.

Basically doing whatever they tell him to do.He's a ***** and a lap dog.

I think you shouldnt be ****y per se but be ready to move on if a girl gives you ****...never ****y.

I agree with that much,but everything else,...put it like this:I'd rather jerk off and pay for it for the rest of my life then take **** from women.

Point blank.

 

[MooseGod]

You said your friend is successful? Is he more successful than you? I have a friend who literally has models going up to him at clubs and parties and giving him their phone numbers. In fact, he just finished up telling me a story about how he just finished up a 4 hour conversation over the phone with a model. I never spend more than 20 minutes on a phone with a girl and have never gotten a hint of interest from the type of girls that he's pulling.

A 4 hour conversation with a model? I'd probably want to shoot myself after the 30 minute mark... I mean, damn, models are hot and all, but most of them are pretty dumb.

 

[DJ1234]

1. If the girl thinks you're cheap it will probably be because of what you chose to eat that night, like take out "sure take out will be fine. " It's not like you threw the bill at her, SHE was the one that offered to pay. Even then you could have offered to pay if you felt that you're being cheap, or told her to get the next round, nothing wrong with that.
2. This is where your friend is wrong, being a CHALLENGE is important. She will become interested if you come too fast, too easy. Girls who can get almost any guy want a guy that is better than them, not a guy who comes off as worse.
3. Again, I can see where your friend might be coming from talking onto the phone for longer to another guy cause she wants someone to talk to, but really, it won't LAST. Spending hours on the phone will land you right in LJBF zone. As much as girls like to talk, it will get boring and die out real quick and she'll be off to do the same thing to the next guy, that is why you ask a girl to do something not be her girlfriend and chat with her for hours...

I believe your friend can get girls, as these issues aren't WBAFC initally, but go tell him to get the girl he wants and try to keep her, he will end up Failing. Go figure

 

[Sandow]

if you asked her out on a date, then it's usually common courtesy to pay for the bill, since you invited her out. But if its a mutual, casual bite to eat, then she should be willing to pay her order. Here's a sign if a girl likes you. Say you pay for dinner. go for a walk after, get some ice cream or coffee. If she doesn't offer to pay for this, then its a huge red flag, any girl that's interested in you will offer to pay. So it's okay to pay for dinner, as long she offers to pay for other things.

Instead of talking about nothing for 2 hours, you can have an exciting conversation in about 10-20 minutes. This will have her on her feet instead of having a dull, boring convo for freakin 2 hours. Also you never wanna give away too much info about yourself. You should have her look forward to getting to know you better. Have a lil spice and suspense in the relationship.

True, if you show NO interest, she'll move on. So it's important that she knows your interested, just not head over heals. she should know your interested, yet you have options. Thats important, she should know you have options and you don't need her.

Your friend has some validity, but the idea behind it is wrong.

 

[Obsidian]

your friend sounds like a total idiot

 

[DonJoseCantosie]

Sandsow is right on! Obsidian...The game his friend is doing is of an idiot, even if he prolly got some lays.

 

[Evolution]

Its a fact of life, that most guys are AFC's. They will resist change, and stick to their AFC ways.

You cannot help them, theres nothing you can do about it. The social conditioning is just too strong.

Besides: You cannot change someone who does not want to helped. It will always be an uphill battle.

The ones who choose to change, will accept a rich life and choice with women.

The ones who resist to change, and remain a AFC. Are doomed to lead a life of misery, and failure with women.

 

[DJVladdy]

Realnezz i agree wit you.
Simps runnin wild, commiting crimes of simpery... and preaching it to the real dudes.

 

[potato]

sympery

simpery

Making up words?

 

[The Forms]

You're jumping to conclusions if you think that by paying 5 dollars for her meal she's just going to use you for your money. If you're out with her and her portion of the meal is 5 dollars and she's willing to see you again, you can rest assured she's not out for your money (because a gold digger wouldn't keep dating a guy who brought her somewhere where her portion of the bill was 5 bucks).

Doing stuff like that is the male version of a **** test. Don't let really small things like that convince you of some major deficiency in her character. Granted, if she expects you to pay for everything all the time, that's a problem. But that's not what's happened yet, so don't lump her in that category until she's shown that you need to.

What's a more reasonable assumption: 1) that she's gold digger for not immediately offering to pay her 5 buck tab, or 2) that you're a cheap ass for not immediately offering to pay her 5 buck tab

 

[Steel131]

Everyone has their own personal style I guess. What works for one, might not work for another. Judging from what your friend said, I see holes in some of his thinking that could led him to get used.

 

[jmm854]

"He also said that Women are above us and they will bring themselves down to our level to be with us. Thinking that us Men are the Prize will do nothing but leave us sitting at home and jacking off. Because the woman that we try to get can get ANY GUY she wants and fvck anyone she wants too. It's US that wants a particular girl, and there will ALWAYS be another guy better than us."

Your buddy's probably a good looking guy that goes with what he does with women because that's what he believes is what works. And that's exactly why to some degree it works for him. Because if you believe in what you're doing, it'll more than likely give you some positive results.

But he'll only be able to do so well. With an attitude like that he's setting a trap to get his own heart broken time and time again.

Women can get ANY guy they want? Even the little hotties? The entire game, my friend, is to make them think there's at least one they MIGHT not be able to. Women are people. Nothing more. No better no less. Tell your boy if he stopped treating p*ssy like gold then maybe HE wouldn't spend as much time jacking off either. But it sounds like it's already too late for that.

Stay wise brother your ideas are real. Good luck.

 

[KontrollerX]

The Forms its not the five bucks thing that would make the chick a gold digger.

You are missing the point.

Its the mentality of this guy's friend that women are better than him, women are the prize and the man must always pay that can and will make this man a victim of a true goldigger one day if he keeps on with his mindset.

 

[Luke Skywalker]

Everything is BS unless it works for you. If your friend is successful with women and you are not, then maybe what he is saying is true.


It would appear to make some sence that if you are faking this DJ stuff and give out the wannabe player vibes, whether you are directly subcommunicating this by supplicating, spending money, or subcommunicating this by being ****y and funny or being deliberately difficult, that it is still some sort of act that's premised on winning the particular girl. Think women don't know about this ****y funny stuff, or what books are being written out there, or attempts guys have made before using this sort of stuff? They would know a real from a fake, so if it's fake, then maybe it's BS?

The only way a woman is not a prize is if you do not like her, or just don't like her that much, which means you have to go with women who are moderately attractive in your view as opposed to a hot girl in which you are. I know I"m a bit intimidated by hot looking women, so guess what, it would seem like they are the prize no matter how much I may pretend they are not otherwise. That's difficult to do if you are genuinely attracted to a girl, obviously you want to win her company and affection.

 

[elmnick]

What the **** is this, a guy can be AFC because he doesn't follow or agree with DJ principles despite the fact he's successful with women. Talk about closed minded. Some of you have lost track of what an AFC is surely.