Vulpine
Master Don Juan
Sorry, BeDJ, you've been around for far too long to be short with you, bru.BeDJ said:
I've thought more about this place and how it helped me change after I was reading this very thread and felt myself getting angry reliving the experience. I am compelled to offer some things that occurred to me along the way. It will ramble a bit, so, buckle up.
I was raised by a single mommy, toted around as collateral for the child support ransom, and never had good male models. My mom is a cluster B, and she came from a large family. I have 7 man-hating aunts, so, by submergence since a young age, I was raised as a man-hating woman. A man-hating woman trapped in a good looking man's body can get laid... but... the women of my past used me for sex and cast me aside when a bigger wallet (or someone who wasn't ashamed of his testosterone levels) came along. I couldn't just ask my father for any insights, he was 2000 miles away. Besides, he wasn't exactly a DJ. Oh, and I was a "latch key" kid, I was left to run amok during my developmental years: little, if any, guidance. Eventually, I'd bed women who were just like mommy. :yes: I was filling my bed (and wasting my days) with crazy women. It was the only model I knew.
I look good, and I ƒuck good, so word got around. Puzzy would fall in my lap. I had read a sex book just before I lost my virginity at 15: the first girl I ƒucked got off before me and would not believe I was a virgin afterwards. So, the book I read did quite a bit for me sexually, but it didn't help one bit in regards to my philosophies and mindset. So, I would just take what I could get. I would accept whatever I was lucky enough to have. This was just how it was in the world: I was continuously perplexed and somehow bound to figure out the crazy games women would play. After all, men were pigs and need to be led on a leash if they want a sniff of vagina. That was all that was on T.V., too. I had nothing to contrast or gauge my models, so the cycle of relationship failures continued to endlessly "lather, rinse, repeat".
While at work looking for a logo (graphic design stuff) on the internet, some random results posted caught my eye and I clicked on the link...
The timing couldn't have been better, I was facing death in the family and having a time of introspection regarding my own life. I was coming to some conclusions and forming some "I'm sick of doing what everyone else is doing and being miserable" sorts of philosophies. Read the Map and Compass and the Castle to actually see where my head was. Simple as it may seem, it never occurred to me (or perhaps it was never offered in advice) that I had any control. What? I can CHOOSE?
As I read, (and read and read and read), I started getting angry. I had squandered my life up until that point, I realized. It wasn't until I was doing the Boot Camp that I began making some simple connections which ultimately squelched the anger and resentment: resentment of my family, friends, media, women, government, marketing, etc. I hated everything and everyone for being blue-pill junkies and pushers.
What simple connections?
Well, let's start way back at "close calls" to my awakening. When I was in high school, I wrote a paper on the history of feminine hygiene products as a spoof. However, when researching the content, I came across concepts of marketing that I can't to this day forget. Imagine, women stuffing free scraps of cloth (or even newspaper, which is also free) in their panties to prevent the blood from ruining their clothes. Then along comes Tampax telling women that they should shove their product up in their coochies because it's "more sanitary" or "worry free"... essentially preying on the fears and doubts of people to turn a profit. Women, it turns out, were better off with free newspaper: plugging the hole is actually more unsanitary than letting it flow. I learned that marketing is creating a need where there was no need previously, and it stuck with me. The "tradition" of the engagement ring? Fabricated by DeBoers, the diamond company, to sell diamonds. No other reason, look it up. They struck while the iron was hot based on a social trend, and it worked. Great marketing. I also discovered the concept of subliminal advertising. Think for a minute about the ramifications of subliminal advertising before continuing to read. It's pretty crucial in understanding our fücked society and YOUR place in it.
Ok, so, market research has shown single females to be the best consumers. Of course, it follows that marketing would want to cultivate more single females, right? *dump him* My mother and father were watching TV long before I was born in 75. And, it didn't take long for them to get a divorce. I came to realize that, if companies were to use subliminal advertising, *dump him* it was only illegal if they got caught. Which, unlike breaking the speed limit, is tough to catch: it's SUBLIMINAL! Is your head out of your ass yet? Do your own research on it; it will put a hurt on your brain.
After finding this place, and starting to recover from being an AFC, the internet delivered a multitude of seemingly unrelated truths to me that prompted a withdrawal from marketing and propaganda. I unplugged my television and sold it, I sold my x-box, and I consciously and deliberately made moves to avoid the spam. Without the constant "obey... be a zombie... be single... buy our sh¡t... alienate your friends if they don't watch LOST too..." and who knows what else firing at me, I didn't feel like my sudden happiness was a coincidence. And I was getting philosophy inputs from here? There were instant, tangible results from my newly exercised "choice": more time, money, and happiness.
A one-two punch of awakening led me to realize that "anyone still hardwired into the matrix is potentially an agent" was far-reaching. My mother, family, friends... I could hardly be mad at them for their, well, "being zombies". Look around. Did you replace your phone that worked just fine for a newer version? Zombie, that's illogical, but you'd never admit it to yourself. You'd argue for hours how "smart" your phone is. You'll parrot the marketing as though it were your own original thought. I can throw my phone in water and still use it after I fish it out. How "smart" is your phone, really?
Coke? Pepsi? Red and blue.
Republican and Democrat? Red and blue.
Ever notice how Coke is more popular in Red states than in Blue states? I realized that I was deluded if I were to believe I'd get anything besides "more of the same 'ol cola" if I voted for Red or Blue. What if I like Mountain Dew? Well, we'll heckle and shame the Green option such that you wouldn't want to vote for the "nobody else is going to" option. Who wants to be on the losing team? Zombies don't think, so they wouldn't know any better. Consider how many people will say "Red" or Blue" when you ask them what their favorite color is. Scary. Zombies vote!!!?
Lying is legal if you don't get caught. Cheating is legal if you don't get caught. Not stopping at stop signs is legal if you don't get caught. Do I sound anti-social enough for a straight-jacket, yet? Good, because this is illustrating the "anger phase" of my grief in realizing the truths I discovered. And, you can see it in the new posters all over this forum.
I chose "non-participation".
All the games I was trying to figure out? I simply stopped playing them.
The online dating game? That one's a loser, quit playing it.
Texting? Another loser game. Never got into it.***
Putting up with women's crap? I stopped playing that game.
Buying new clothes for 500x what the same shirt with different logos would cost at GoodWill?
Consumption,
Materialism,
Misandry,
Self-deprecation,
I chose non-participation for all the toxic, unhealthy, and counter-productive behaviors whenever I could recognize them. I developed a strong distaste for Kool-Aid, any flavor, I'd prefer water.
The anger was finally banished when I was able to understand that I didn't know until I now know. I could forgive myself for my naïveté because it was nurture, not nature. I was living in a dreamworld, like Neo.
This place helped me to realize that it is perfectly fine and normal to want something that I want. I am free to live my life according to me, not what the Matrix dictates. I am not somehow obligated to keep trying to talk to *******s. At work, I could make decisions based on results and not fear losing my job. At the club, I could chose who I wanted to talk to.
This place helped a lost little boy discover what he wanted to be when he grew up. Once that little boy knew, then, only then, could he make choices to get what he wants. You have to know what you like, what you want, who you want, and where you want to be. I didn't "discover how to ƒuck women" here. I discovered internal-validation (whereas the self-defeating, external-validation was my previous operating system). I discovered that personal wishes is not narcissism. I discovered the difference between true logic and group-think. I discovered that friends, lovers, family, jobs, homes, dollars... they all come and go. The ONLY constant in my future is ME. I discovered autonomy. I discovered who I was here. I discovered freedom.
***Who convinced the masses of zombies to text? Whoever charged money for the service, Duh. It's ineffective communication: especially when you have a PHONE in your hand. Spectacular marketing scheme. Truly an "engagement ring" creation if you'll ever see one. "Everyone else is doing it, so, me too! Despite logic!"
