I battled long and hard to get to where I am here now so before I begin, Let me introduce myself.
I am LikRetsam. I was gifted with good looks, intelligence, humor etc.. I am 6'2 and 15 years old. I was succesful with women before being a DJ based on my confidence but having all these good traits often turned to arrogance.
My girl, X, is an HB9. She, at the start of my tale, was my bestfriend. We are talking September 03. I fell for her. I got oneitis and was "AFC"ish. I called every day, we spent all our time together at school and I even managed to write 5 pages in her little notebook about my feelings for her. Yup.
You can imagine the hurt involved when I told her that I liked her. We were deep in the friends zone and I went in for the kill, unprepared against a lion with only my bare hands to help me. Needless to say the battle was bloody and that I had lost.
I went ice skating with my group of friends, male and female, and told X I had something to tell her. She told me that if it was a question, she wouldn't know what to answer. The lion smelt my asking her out a mile away. We had a wonderful friendship and so that was her defense... It wasn't worth ruining over a fling. Truth was, her IL was low.
It was time to dig up www.sosuave.com and so I did and I learned to be free . I learned to enjoy life, to not take anything for granted. To see all the downs as bumps in the road, just another challenge. I was... Happy...
Oct'03.
I got caught up with X's best female friend, Z. Z is one ugly pos. I was getting desperate at the time and actually considered Z. I shiver typing this as I remember being attracted to her. We started hanging together alot. We went on walks often (We have alot of free hours (Private school) ) . We even skipped the buses one day to go to a park and stare at the stars. I was falling for this girl. I had left X in her corner and prioritized Y. I invited Y one day, knowing she had fallen for me, to my place. We watched some tv, cuddled on my couch and then went to my basement in my "special" room. We listened to music and just talked. Her father arrived at this time but talked to my mom for 20 minutes. For 20 minutes, I was horny. She was sitting on my bed and I was kneeling with my hands on her legs. We were very close.
That was my test. I was horny as **** and want to tap that but then again, I had millions of things going through my head. I realised I didn't want to tap that. I could tap far better. I had sunk very low, I was desperate ... I could not tolerate this. I have extremly high moral standars and I just couldnt put up with that. I was going for an HB5 or 6 at max. Her eyes showed that she was dieing for it and so did mine but my brain defeated my ****. That was that. I am so happy today that I did not tap that. I don't recall ever being as horny as then but to have gone above my sexual desires to defend in what I believed in is just amazing to me.
I sent her home.
A few weeks later, she was still all over me and eventually asked me out (exclusive relationship). She got shot down. Hard. She cried.
This was my moment. Y loves to ***** about her life. All she was doing since that night at my place was turn the round around her to ****. Everything that came out of her mouth was negative. Her circle of friends were always down and had enough of her. I don't believe in getting down over crap. I don't believe in being depressed because of stupid issues with friends. I do not tolerate such people. I let it rip. It was not even funny.
I let it out. All of it. Calmly, gently but firmly. She was in tears for 50 minutes. It was about time some one did something about it.
*****************************************
At this time, X is low on my friends list. I keep contact to a minimal hi and how was your weekend type thing. fluff talk, no more then 3 minutes.
X was my goal. I played the Ganji games, but I only realise that now.
I was sprouting back into a DJ. I had been succesful without these rules and guidlines. I was afc-ish at times and DJ-ish at others, it didn't matter. I was succesful eather way. I picked up on DonJuanism. It was wonderful, a great experience. I played my cards better and I was even more succesful.
******************************************
Nov '03
We, the 10th graders, had an outing to a play. The play ended a few hours early (misprint) so we were stuck at the theater for that time. X and I, for the first time in a very long time, had a conversation. We were having so much fun. It was the first time in my whole life I could not sleep because of how happy I was. Y, in her mindset "I hate the world and the world hates me", Tries to talk X while I took some time off to be with my other friends. I come back and push X (We had heavy kino going) and fall back to my circle of friends, she tailgates me while Y is activly talking to her. Ouch!
I had become the man I had always wanted to be. I, at this point, have a female around me at all times. Every time people see me, it's with a new chick. I was really proud of what was happening. I got 7 Friends with benifits during that month and am currently dating 6 different girls.
December '03 .
A great way of ending the year. In Style. I No longer cared or gave a $#%& about anything. It was wonderful. I was free . I was getting chicks by the truckload. I PU left and right and once again, most importantly, I was happy . I no longer cared about chicks or getting chicks. Losing one didn't mean anything to me. Losing them all wouldn't bother me. I don't give a $#@%!!!!!
I continually portrayed the "I want you but I don't need you" attitude.
I no longer was close with X at this point and I had an argument with Y so we didn't see each other much. X turned away from this fight by sticking to the pool table in the study hall. 2 weeks after the start of our way, I appologized to Y for everything that happened. Why?
X. She broke down and couldn't take it anymore. She hated what was going on and hated being at the pool table all the time. So she asked me to end this "war". So I did. I had had enough of it too. I made things peaceful again, that didn't mean I made us whole again.
Y was happy because she is so damn stupid. At the begining I told X that she would have to chose her friends. I didn't care about losing her or not as she was no longer part of my life really so I took that gamble. Y one day *****ed at X but X diverted the attack and calmed stupid down. Yes, we are now refering to Y as stupid. Stupid would follow X around everywhere even though she was clearly unwanted and they never spoke anymore. X was at the pool table and stupid observed the couches like a good little donkey. X used this to her advantage. She told stupid that she had chosen stupid over me. BOOM! Stupid's ego flies through the roof and seeks me out asap. She sits next to me with an air of confidence about her. I rare site indeed. She started talking (I didn't ask) and told me what they had talked about and her ending statement was " She chose me over you". Wow. Anger flowing through every one of my veins. I was about to lose it. X had lied to stupid. Stupid was stupid.
I calmed down, and answered the golden answer: Actions speak louder than wods ". Got up and left.
For the first time in a long time, I got angry. It felt good. I shrugged it off as nothing. Stupidity gets to me you know? But I won't let it.
X-mas vacation arrives. I am no longer seeking anything from X, I don't think about X, I don't want X, X doesn't even cross my mind, no chick does. This is the golden state of mind. I can not express the power in your grasp at that moment.
December 23rd. X calls. We need to go x-mas shopping. We do. Eventually, her hand is hurting so I take it in mine and we hold hands for the rest of the time. No kiss close. She is just a friend to me. Nothing more.
Post x-mas. She calls and has had enough of her vacation and says "we" need to do something saturday. I'm like hmm... sure... But hey! what are you doing tonight? ok meet me at XYZ at 6. We go see last samurai, hold hands, have the kino going. She holds my arm. At this time I realise that she is into me. I have a wonderful time as did she. She gets home and e-mails me telling me how great her night was. No kiss close. I wanted to, being certain she was looking for more then friendship and that there would be no regret. We're walking out and her parents are right ****ing there. Pull her away quickly and start *****ing because it's late and she didn't call and take her away. I stand there just staring as they walk away. My plans went BOOM! No problem. I don't care. I don't need her.
I don't call or anything. I never do anymore.
I am LikRetsam. I was gifted with good looks, intelligence, humor etc.. I am 6'2 and 15 years old. I was succesful with women before being a DJ based on my confidence but having all these good traits often turned to arrogance.
My girl, X, is an HB9. She, at the start of my tale, was my bestfriend. We are talking September 03. I fell for her. I got oneitis and was "AFC"ish. I called every day, we spent all our time together at school and I even managed to write 5 pages in her little notebook about my feelings for her. Yup.
You can imagine the hurt involved when I told her that I liked her. We were deep in the friends zone and I went in for the kill, unprepared against a lion with only my bare hands to help me. Needless to say the battle was bloody and that I had lost.
I went ice skating with my group of friends, male and female, and told X I had something to tell her. She told me that if it was a question, she wouldn't know what to answer. The lion smelt my asking her out a mile away. We had a wonderful friendship and so that was her defense... It wasn't worth ruining over a fling. Truth was, her IL was low.
It was time to dig up www.sosuave.com and so I did and I learned to be free . I learned to enjoy life, to not take anything for granted. To see all the downs as bumps in the road, just another challenge. I was... Happy...
Oct'03.
I got caught up with X's best female friend, Z. Z is one ugly pos. I was getting desperate at the time and actually considered Z. I shiver typing this as I remember being attracted to her. We started hanging together alot. We went on walks often (We have alot of free hours (Private school) ) . We even skipped the buses one day to go to a park and stare at the stars. I was falling for this girl. I had left X in her corner and prioritized Y. I invited Y one day, knowing she had fallen for me, to my place. We watched some tv, cuddled on my couch and then went to my basement in my "special" room. We listened to music and just talked. Her father arrived at this time but talked to my mom for 20 minutes. For 20 minutes, I was horny. She was sitting on my bed and I was kneeling with my hands on her legs. We were very close.
That was my test. I was horny as **** and want to tap that but then again, I had millions of things going through my head. I realised I didn't want to tap that. I could tap far better. I had sunk very low, I was desperate ... I could not tolerate this. I have extremly high moral standars and I just couldnt put up with that. I was going for an HB5 or 6 at max. Her eyes showed that she was dieing for it and so did mine but my brain defeated my ****. That was that. I am so happy today that I did not tap that. I don't recall ever being as horny as then but to have gone above my sexual desires to defend in what I believed in is just amazing to me.
I sent her home.
A few weeks later, she was still all over me and eventually asked me out (exclusive relationship). She got shot down. Hard. She cried.
This was my moment. Y loves to ***** about her life. All she was doing since that night at my place was turn the round around her to ****. Everything that came out of her mouth was negative. Her circle of friends were always down and had enough of her. I don't believe in getting down over crap. I don't believe in being depressed because of stupid issues with friends. I do not tolerate such people. I let it rip. It was not even funny.
I let it out. All of it. Calmly, gently but firmly. She was in tears for 50 minutes. It was about time some one did something about it.
*****************************************
At this time, X is low on my friends list. I keep contact to a minimal hi and how was your weekend type thing. fluff talk, no more then 3 minutes.
X was my goal. I played the Ganji games, but I only realise that now.
I was sprouting back into a DJ. I had been succesful without these rules and guidlines. I was afc-ish at times and DJ-ish at others, it didn't matter. I was succesful eather way. I picked up on DonJuanism. It was wonderful, a great experience. I played my cards better and I was even more succesful.
******************************************
Nov '03
We, the 10th graders, had an outing to a play. The play ended a few hours early (misprint) so we were stuck at the theater for that time. X and I, for the first time in a very long time, had a conversation. We were having so much fun. It was the first time in my whole life I could not sleep because of how happy I was. Y, in her mindset "I hate the world and the world hates me", Tries to talk X while I took some time off to be with my other friends. I come back and push X (We had heavy kino going) and fall back to my circle of friends, she tailgates me while Y is activly talking to her. Ouch!
I had become the man I had always wanted to be. I, at this point, have a female around me at all times. Every time people see me, it's with a new chick. I was really proud of what was happening. I got 7 Friends with benifits during that month and am currently dating 6 different girls.
December '03 .
A great way of ending the year. In Style. I No longer cared or gave a $#%& about anything. It was wonderful. I was free . I was getting chicks by the truckload. I PU left and right and once again, most importantly, I was happy . I no longer cared about chicks or getting chicks. Losing one didn't mean anything to me. Losing them all wouldn't bother me. I don't give a $#@%!!!!!
I continually portrayed the "I want you but I don't need you" attitude.
I no longer was close with X at this point and I had an argument with Y so we didn't see each other much. X turned away from this fight by sticking to the pool table in the study hall. 2 weeks after the start of our way, I appologized to Y for everything that happened. Why?
X. She broke down and couldn't take it anymore. She hated what was going on and hated being at the pool table all the time. So she asked me to end this "war". So I did. I had had enough of it too. I made things peaceful again, that didn't mean I made us whole again.
Y was happy because she is so damn stupid. At the begining I told X that she would have to chose her friends. I didn't care about losing her or not as she was no longer part of my life really so I took that gamble. Y one day *****ed at X but X diverted the attack and calmed stupid down. Yes, we are now refering to Y as stupid. Stupid would follow X around everywhere even though she was clearly unwanted and they never spoke anymore. X was at the pool table and stupid observed the couches like a good little donkey. X used this to her advantage. She told stupid that she had chosen stupid over me. BOOM! Stupid's ego flies through the roof and seeks me out asap. She sits next to me with an air of confidence about her. I rare site indeed. She started talking (I didn't ask) and told me what they had talked about and her ending statement was " She chose me over you". Wow. Anger flowing through every one of my veins. I was about to lose it. X had lied to stupid. Stupid was stupid.
I calmed down, and answered the golden answer: Actions speak louder than wods ". Got up and left.
For the first time in a long time, I got angry. It felt good. I shrugged it off as nothing. Stupidity gets to me you know? But I won't let it.
X-mas vacation arrives. I am no longer seeking anything from X, I don't think about X, I don't want X, X doesn't even cross my mind, no chick does. This is the golden state of mind. I can not express the power in your grasp at that moment.
December 23rd. X calls. We need to go x-mas shopping. We do. Eventually, her hand is hurting so I take it in mine and we hold hands for the rest of the time. No kiss close. She is just a friend to me. Nothing more.
Post x-mas. She calls and has had enough of her vacation and says "we" need to do something saturday. I'm like hmm... sure... But hey! what are you doing tonight? ok meet me at XYZ at 6. We go see last samurai, hold hands, have the kino going. She holds my arm. At this time I realise that she is into me. I have a wonderful time as did she. She gets home and e-mails me telling me how great her night was. No kiss close. I wanted to, being certain she was looking for more then friendship and that there would be no regret. We're walking out and her parents are right ****ing there. Pull her away quickly and start *****ing because it's late and she didn't call and take her away. I stand there just staring as they walk away. My plans went BOOM! No problem. I don't care. I don't need her.
I don't call or anything. I never do anymore.
