FR: At the gym

[BigMike]

Originally posted by Broham
UPDATE:

She flaked. I kinda don't blame her. We only talked for 5-6 minutes so not much trust/rapport was built. I wish she had called me and at least made up a bs excuse why she couldn't go, but girls will be girls.


Hoss- I'm on the northshore but go into Boston frequently. PM me if you wanna sarge sometime.

We gotta do a Boston meet-up one of these weekends!

We can have a massive field report from a large club.

 

[Broham]

Blitz- Check your PM box

Seth- Thanks man. I too think I'm about 90% there but still haven't found the remaining pieces to the puzzle. Those pieces being closing the right away, and as Blitz said, creating empathy.

BigMike- I'm game for a Boston DJ get-together. I actually posted about this in the wingman forum. I've always believed in power in numbers, and if we brought our experiences together we'd be upstoppable!

 

[xblitz44x]

Broham,

Your PM box is full.

 

[Broham]

Should be all set now.

 

[Tazman]

In my opinion you didn't do anything wrong. In fact, they way you approached it made it slightly difficult for her to say no (good skills) without seeming rude (even though it wouldn't be, but some women don't like expressing that up front). I assumed she would flake because of the incident with the # exchange because she offered no alternative and you said she was sitting there thinking about it for a while. It's entirely possible she just wasn't interested and it had nothing to do with your approach. I wish I had your convo skills.

 

[SuperEMan]

Yes, I've found that the key really for getting anywhere with girls that are already attracted to you is to make her comfortable as soon as possible in the first interaction which includes revealing personal info... the first girl I spoke to after making this realization happily gave me all her info later ... it's amazing what a big difference this makes. Good luck.

 

[tmpgstx]

Broham, i can see why she flaked though. It was just a bit rushed and too cold - and she might have been the flakey type anyway.

Also, when you asked that girl about having sex with what guy at the gym - she doesn't know you well enough yet for you to ask something like this IMO. It comes off as a 'player' type and just interested in sex if ya get my drift.

 

[Sapiens]

Originally posted by xblitz44x
Broham,

I respect the way you perceive each situation as an opportunity, and how you charge through your fear to approach, that is awesome. You are about 300 steps above a lot of people here.

Your problem is that you're TOO comfortable and seem to ignore her comfort level. When you reach the level you're at, and you're able to approach, start and sustain a conversation, and close...your next step is EMPATHY.

Empathy is understanding and considering another's situation or state. Put yourself in her shoes and imagine if a "strange" guy asked you in the first 10 minutes who you'd like to have sex with. It is extremely intrusive to some and you have to be aware of that.

Before you approach, put yourself in her shoes and think of how you can put HER more at ease so that she can more comfortable thus responsive to your advances.

Those two girls may very well have found you attractive, but your abrasive manner was a threat to them.

Great progress though, congrats.

Blitz

Excellent post by Blitz,

This is what I was looking for, this explains my awesome success!

Thanks Blitz!

 

[Broham]

Originally posted by tmpgstx
Also, when you asked that girl about having sex with what guy at the gym - she doesn't know you well enough yet for you to ask something like this IMO. It comes off as a 'player' type and just interested in sex if ya get my drift.

Good point man. I think girls would rather have a player than a pvssy though.

 

[Broham]

UPDATE: She just called me. She said she lost the piece of paper my # was on. She apologized for not showing up and wants to meet up this wkend. I told her to call me back at 5:30 today. Now that I know the IL is there, I think I'm gonna ask her to go out for drinks instead of coffee. BOO-YA.

 

[xblitz44x]

Atta' boy. Way to go.

 

[ShyRyder]

Originally posted by Broham


B: Occasionally!? and I thought you were a fun girl!
H: Well, uhh....
B: Hey, I'm sure scrabble can be fun.
H: hahaha

B: Ok, let's do this. here's my #. let's plan on meeting up at starbucks on Wed at 7:30. ***If you can't make it, give me a call.***

*takes some serious notes*

Originally posted by xblitz44x
Broham,
Your problem is that you're TOO comfortable

ha, there is such a thing as being too smooth.

*shakes head*

One day man One day