FR: Approached the same girl a 2nd time on the bus.

[ElStud]

Well today I approached that Allison girl a 2nd time on the bus. Here's how it went:

Had difficulty starting it up but when I sat next to her, I said "Hey, how's it going?" and she's like "Good, how's it going with you?" and I say "Good" . I start cold reading saying "I bet you're the nature type of girl" and she's like "What?" and I'm like "What, you can't hear me?" and she's like "No" and I'm like "Oh maybe you're one of those girls with bad ears" and she's like "Yeah".

Somewhere along the line the bus driver makes this announcement and after that happens I say "As I was saying, I bet you're the type of girl who's a nature nut, I can see it now, you're the type of girl that goes home and the first thing you do is go on your computer, you go to google and the first thing you type in is "How can I fix global warming?" she's like "I go home and I read, do homework, and read webcomics" and I'm like "Which webcomics?" and she goes "I don't know, just webcomics" and I'm like "That's a rather vague answer" and she's like "Yeah, well there are a lot of different ones".

Then I'm like "So I saw you at the jubilee" she's like "Yeah, I was only there for like 5 minutes" and I tell her about how I saw this one band there. Then I said "So what did you do on Friday?" she said "I saw Shrek" and I'm like "Yeah, I saw a movie recently, Spiderman 3" she's like "Yeah, I heard it was really bad" I'm like "Yeah, it was like a chick flick with Spiderman in it" and she says "Well I actually think chick flick is a deragatory term", I ask her why she feels that way and she explains why she feels that way. I eventually say "Well, there are good chick flicks, like this movie called A Walk To Remember". We talk about that, then there's silence.

Yeah, I honestly don't think this chick is attracted at all. If she was, she wouldn't just plug in to her headphones after the silence. Again, maybe she's just shy.

 

[Docs]

Push the enter button about 40 times and let me know you updated that spam festival.
I'll examine it then.

 

[ElStud]

Push the enter button about 40 times and let me know you updated that spam festival.
I'll examine it then.

Ah I see, you're incapable of reading long paragraphs. And spam festival? Wow, what a jerk, you're calling it a spam festival because you're incapable of reading long paragraphs. Anyway, I updated it for lazy people like you.

 

[Docs]

Don't start with me. I have more knowledge within me then you can even shake with a stick. Such as is why I wanted you to press the enter button.

Not to be mean or anything, but first impressions desire the same feedback. One very important rule to remember when you ask for something, like a job, feedback, a date.

 

[ElStud]

Don't start with me. I have more knowledge within me then you can even shake with a stick. Such as is why I wanted you to press the enter button.

Not to be mean or anything, but first impressions desire the same feedback. One very important rule to remember when you ask for something, like a job, feedback, a date.

Nobody's starting. Listen dude I don't understand what you're trying to get at with this sarcastic enter button business, but just give advice or don't post. You say you have knowledge, spread some of that knowledge on me by giving me advice on how I could improve.

 

[ElStud]

was there anything about her that made you say she seems like the nature type of girl that would go home and look online for ways to save the ozone?

Nope I was cold reading, assuming she was that type of girl.

 

[Docs]

Nobody's starting. Listen dude I don't understand what you're trying to get at with this sarcastic enter button business, but just give advice or don't post. You say you have knowledge, spread some of that knowledge on me by giving me advice on how I could improve.

I come from a professional enviroment where first impressions count, but how you carry yourself matter just as much. From my first impression of you, it appears you don't care about sentence (or paragraph structure). I think the guy that types out his problem in a LEGIABLE form deserves the help more.

Secondly, the way you flew off the handle. You honestly expect a girl to react positively to you if that's all it took (and quite honestly, it wasn't even an attempt to enrage you)?

That's more then enough advice for you. Don't expect a girl (or anyone) to take you seriously if you continue to act the way you are.

 

[ElStud]

And this has nothing to do with the approach whatsoever, so I don't really care. I do not care about how you think I type, this topic is not about that. I posted this because I wanted advice on the approach and if you continue to post off topic stuff, I'll just ignore you for trolling my topic. So what if it's not professional? Most of the posts on this site aren't professional. It's readible and you can get the point. Stop being such a grammar wh*re man. You're a troll, if you are not going to give advice, leave. From here on, you are officially ignored.

 

[EdHunter]

Okay, I've got a question. Why are you opening with the whole "nature type of girl" thing? Personally, I don't think it's a good idea, for two reasons.
1. If the girl isn't a tree-hugger, then she'll be sort of weirded-out by it, and you'll have sort of used your one chance to make a first impression for naught.
2. If the girl is a tree-hugger type, she actually might be kind of offended by "nature net," and so on. My ex was/is really big into recycling, and she got so pissed whenever someone didn't take it seriously..

Why didn't you ask her about the Jubilee? That was a shared experience you two had---you know that she was there, ergo she must have done something---much better than just a random stab in the dark.

 

[Lust]

And this has nothing to do with the approach whatsoever, so I don't really care. I do not care about how you think I type, this topic is not about that. I posted this because I wanted advice on the approach and if you continue to post off topic stuff, I'll just ignore you for trolling my topic. So what if it's not professional? Most of the posts on this site aren't professional. It's readible and you can get the point. Stop being such a grammar wh*re man. You're a troll, if you are not going to give advice, leave. From here on, you are officially ignored.

Mate, cool it. Docs is a smart guy, I've read his post around. It can't help to take in his suggestion without being negative about it. I, myself hate posts where people don't use proper grammar.

Now to the point,

Your cold reading isn't up to scratch, I think it's really hurting you. If some chick came up to me and accused me of a nature nut I'd tell her to go jump the lake.

Cold reading is telling a woman something about her based on your observation.

You on the other hand, have been using the same cold reads with a number of different sets. You need to get good at observation, body language, the way she talks, the way she walks etc... before you can make a cold read.

If you are going to cold read and still aren't too good at observation, then it may be a better idea to cold read with things that most women can relate to. Not every woman is a "nature nut", or gets sick on rides. But if you say something like:

"I bet you are the type of girl who is really loud and strong on the outside, but sometimes you feel a sense of emotional confusion in the inside" to a really alpha, loud chick, chances are she'll take it in.

I've mentioned before that I don't really like using cold reading until she is attracted to me, or I at least have a firm grip of her attention.

A lot of the times, if you were to cold read too early, the woman will just look at you like you are an idiot, and reply "No, not really". Blow you off just like that. So, I personally think you should hold the cold reading until at least 10-15 minutes into a set.

I have read a few of your reports, and I don't think you are conveying enough of your own personality in your sets.

I really despise the whole "How are you?", "What did you do on the weekend?" fluff. It KILLS your set unless you have pumped a lot of attraction.

I personally almost NEVER use those questions in a set. Every guy asks her that, and you are not every guy. You are a Don Juan, you have to be different.

Also, in this particular set, I noticed that she didn't ask you a single question, while you asked a fair few.

Questions telegraph interest, you are interested in what she has to say. The fact that she didn't return with any questions means she was not attracted to you at all, it is something to keep in mind so that next time this happens, you can deal with it accordingly (Pump a sh*tload of attraction). When you asked "What did you do on Friday?", and she did not return the question, even out of politeness, it means the set needs a lot of work on. Instead of asking her questions, make statements.

Also, keeping in mind what I said above, your opening line "Hey, hows it going?" is a question. So basically, the first thing you say to her telegraphs interest, and is something that most AFC guys would say. She doesn't know you are any different yet, which is why I stressed the point about your openers in the previous thread.

I think your biggest problem is that you don't display higher value. To her, you are just like every other guy. You need to mention something that shows high value. Maybe you work out, maybe you met a celebrity, maybe you are friends with something of high value, eg a DJ at a local club. Anything that shows you are a high value guy, and that you are interesting, stick it in the set.

Anything that doesn't eg. "What did you do on Friday?" and fluff talk. I honestly believe in this concept: There are two things you can do in a set, one gets you closer to her spreading her legs, and one gets your further away from it. If you aren't doing something that is demonstrating high value, or attractive, then you are pushing her away.

And remember, have fun out there!

Good luck,

-Lust

 

[ElStud]

Mate, cool it. Docs is a smart guy, I've read his post around. It can't help to take in his suggestion without being negative about it. I, myself hate posts where people don't use proper grammar.

Now to the point,

Your cold reading isn't up to scratch, I think it's really hurting you. If some chick came up to me and accused me of a nature nut I'd tell her to go jump the lake.

Cold reading is telling a woman something about her based on your observation.

You on the other hand, have been using the same cold reads with a number of different sets. You need to get good at observation, body language, the way she talks, the way she walks etc... before you can make a cold read.

If you are going to cold read and still aren't too good at observation, then it may be a better idea to cold read with things that most women can relate to. Not every woman is a "nature nut", or gets sick on rides. But if you say something like:

"I bet you are the type of girl who is really loud and strong on the outside, but sometimes you feel a sense of emotional confusion in the inside" to a really alpha, loud chick, chances are she'll take it in.

I've mentioned before that I don't really like using cold reading until she is attracted to me, or I at least have a firm grip of her attention.

A lot of the times, if you were to cold read too early, the woman will just look at you like you are an idiot, and reply "No, not really". Blow you off just like that. So, I personally think you should hold the cold reading until at least 10-15 minutes into a set.

I have read a few of your reports, and I don't think you are conveying enough of your own personality in your sets.

I really despise the whole "How are you?", "What did you do on the weekend?" fluff. It KILLS your set unless you have pumped a lot of attraction.

I personally almost NEVER use those questions in a set. Every guy asks her that, and you are not every guy. You are a Don Juan, you have to be different.

Also, in this particular set, I noticed that she didn't ask you a single question, while you asked a fair few.

Questions telegraph interest, you are interested in what she has to say. The fact that she didn't return with any questions means she was not attracted to you at all, it is something to keep in mind so that next time this happens, you can deal with it accordingly (Pump a sh*tload of attraction). When you asked "What did you do on Friday?", and she did not return the question, even out of politeness, it means the set needs a lot of work on. Instead of asking her questions, make statements.

Also, keeping in mind what I said above, your opening line "Hey, hows it going?" is a question. So basically, the first thing you say to her telegraphs interest, and is something that most AFC guys would say. She doesn't know you are any different yet, which is why I stressed the point about your openers in the previous thread.

I think your biggest problem is that you don't display higher value. To her, you are just like every other guy. You need to mention something that shows high value. Maybe you work out, maybe you met a celebrity, maybe you are friends with something of high value, eg a DJ at a local club. Anything that shows you are a high value guy, and that you are interesting, stick it in the set.

Anything that doesn't eg. "What did you do on Friday?" and fluff talk. I honestly believe in this concept: There are two things you can do in a set, one gets you closer to her spreading her legs, and one gets your further away from it. If you aren't doing something that is demonstrating high value, or attractive, then you are pushing her away.

And remember, have fun out there!

Good luck,

-Lust

Oh, I know Docs a smart guy, but when the topic becomes spefically about my grammar and no one's posting any advice, there comes a point where it needs to stop. Second of all, this topic is about this approach, not grammar. I see tons of people on this forum with worse grammar than me and he doesn't go all grammar wh*re on them.

And what do you mean when you said she didn't return the question when I asked what she did on Friday? She answered saying "I saw Shrek".

Pretty good advice. But dude I don't know how I would demonstrate high value. I play instruments, do track, and program, there's really no way I can create high value off of that.

I'm thinking about approaching her again today, probably opening with a story. "Hey, I have to tell you this hilarious story. So a couple weeks ago me and my friends were at a track meet at [schoolname] and we saw this guy on this other team who looked just like Jesus. Seriously though, this dude had that long hair that you see in all those paintings of Jesus, and I swear this dude looked just like him. It was hilarious, everyone was yelling "Hey, it's Jesus!" and "Hallejuah" from the stands, me and my friends were cracking up".

 

[EdHunter]

Dude, you can create high value off of anything, even if it's stupid.
I'm a policy debater, and I'm not even that good, but I've created value just by talking really, really fast...

If I can do that, you can easily demonstrate HV w/ track or music (both of which are much more acceptable as high value areas than speed reading).

 

[ElStud]

Dude, you can create high value off of anything, even if it's stupid.
I'm a policy debater, and I'm not even that good, but I've created value just by talking really, really fast...

If I can do that, you can easily demonstrate HV w/ track or music (both of which are much more acceptable as high value areas than speed reading).

I see, well got any examples of how I would actually go about demonstrating high value off of music or track? Remember, I'm new at this.

 

[Lust]

Oh, I know Docs a smart guy, but when the topic becomes spefically about my grammar and no one's posting any advice, there comes a point where it needs to stop. Second of all, this topic is about this approach, not grammar. I see tons of people on this forum with worse grammar than me and he doesn't go all grammar wh*re on them.

And what do you mean when you said she didn't return the question when I asked what she did on Friday? She answered saying "I saw Shrek".

Pretty good advice. But dude I don't know how I would demonstrate high value. I play instruments, do track, and program, there's really no way I can create high value off of that.

I'm thinking about approaching her again today, probably opening with a story. "Hey, I have to tell you this hilarious story. So a couple weeks ago me and my friends were at a track meet at [schoolname] and we saw this guy on this other team who looked just like Jesus. Seriously though, this dude had that long hair that you see in all those paintings of Jesus, and I swear this dude looked just like him. It was hilarious, everyone was yelling "Hey, it's Jesus!" and "Hallejuah" from the stands, me and my friends were cracking up".

What I mean is, when you asked, "What did you do on Friday?", she didn't reply with "What about you?".

Don't approach her again, it will come off as needy because you didn't create any attraction before. Try raising some social proof before approaching her again.

With DHVing, it's easy to do it with just about anything. The instruments a particularly good one, you can say you're a musician and you plan on touring the world. Anything that's funny and subconsciously raising your value.

If you still can't think of any ways, try just leaving everything negative you have to say about yourself out, and keeping only the positive.

 

[ElStud]

What I mean is, when you asked, "What did you do on Friday?", she didn't reply with "What about you?".

Don't approach her again, it will come off as needy because you didn't create any attraction before. Try raising some social proof before approaching her again.

With DHVing, it's easy to do it with just about anything. The instruments a particularly good one, you can say you're a musician and you plan on touring the world. Anything that's funny and subconsciously raising your value.

If you still can't think of any ways, try just leaving everything negative you have to say about yourself out, and keeping only the positive.

Well I know I'm not needy so I really don't care how it comes off, besides I didn't approach her on the ride home yesterday which pretty much shows I'm not needy. If I approach her everytime I see her, that's needy, but I don't do that.

So would "I play guitar and I'm going to become a rockstar some day" be higher value?

 

[oakraiderz2]

Well I know I'm not needy so I really don't care how it comes off, besides I didn't approach her on the ride home yesterday which pretty much shows I'm not needy. If I approach her everytime I see her, that's needy, but I don't do that.

So would "I play guitar and I'm going to become a rockstar some day" be higher value?

Your attitude is horrible. Learn how to read people and you wont get responses like you did. Dont bash on a girl you just met, unless its tied in with a compliment. She doesnt like you, move on and stop being offended.

 

[ElStud]

Your attitude is horrible. Learn how to read people and you wont get responses like you did. Dont bash on a girl you just met, unless its tied in with a compliment. She doesnt like you, move on and stop being offended.

I didn't bash her, I was TRYING to be playful. And yeah I will get an attitude if someone trolls my topic with irrelavent stuff when I just want advice on my approaches. At the least he could send me a PM about it, except for spamming my topic with that stuff. You do not understand, I did not ask for help on my grammar nor did I want it. You want to help me out, give me some advice about the actual approach, not my grammar; if the grammar bothers you so much you refuse to read it, well first of all, you have problems and second of all, okay, you don't have to give advice, others will. I've typed the same way in several other topics and I've gotten advice. Even more, this is not a grammar topic, this is a topic about an approach. Therefore talking about grammar in a topic that is not about grammar would be labeled as being off-topic and could pass as spam or trolling. And there are several people on this site with worse grammar, so why don't you go spam their topics too?

 

[GaryUranga]

just to add somethign to this I heard its a bad idea to tel la girl "I saw you in..." or whatever, sounds stalkerish and liek youre more interested than she is (since youre the one noticing her)

 

[greenlake]

first of all, u should avoid mocking her or prejudging her in a bad way. and what does nature have to do with going on comp??

second, u should stop talking about things and find a reason to go personal. for ex, appreciate how hardworking she is by going home and do her hw right away or tell her u like how she is organized and got everything planned out.

btw, this is kinda off topic. but YOU GO GIRL!!! i like what you say to Docs. i don't like people who try to act smart when in reality that made them look dumb. and u, el stud. you should change your attitude. what's the point of this thread? to get advice, right? here Lust(you're the man!!) giving you advices and u just try to correct him on things that don't even matters now.

remember, don't give up. atleast u're doing it and i give u respect for that.

 

[greenlake]

garyuranga- it doesnt really matter what u open. it more how u carry it. if u walk up to her like a creep then she will think ur a creep. but if u walk up to her with no expectation and be alpha then she will think u're her romeo.

i myelf have tried that before and even went up a few notch by telling her "u're cute, i want to know u." and i still get good results. just think of it. guys rarely go up to a girl and tell her "u're pretty". either he tell his friend to go tell her that or hide his intention by acting disinterest.

okay, what if she notice u walking around staring at her? well...go up to her anyway!!! instead of asking for direction, should just tell her how u feel and that u're nervous. she will aprreciate u for being real. trust me, a few blonde girls invite me into their conversation after i admit to them that i'm not realling asking for direction i just want to go up and say hi.