ThunderMaverick
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2004
- Messages
- 1,946
- Reaction score
- 70
- Age
- 42
*deep breath* Typing long stories suck. I spend an hour writing and I feel like I could have done something more interesting with that hour, like looking at the latest porn (tube8.com, WHAT'S Up!! LAWLZ) or searching for old WWF wrestlers on wikipedia. (over 40 within the last 10 years have died. Many from heart failure! Can you BELIEVE THAT!? Oh mah gawd! *flicks wrist*)
Now that I wasted 5 minutes typing out that first paragraph, (GODDAMMIT!) I'll get to this story.
Last Thursday I went down to USC to hang with some of my graduating friends. Most of the graduates took part in a ceremony called "the fountain run". All around campus there are like dozens of fountains and the students get down to their underwear and run around in it. Hundreds of naked, drunken bodies filled the small scattered fountains. It was a good time. No, I didn't go in. Not that I care that I didn't go in; I didn't have shorts. I wasn't drunk enough either. Boo hoo.
Later as the night went on I got drunk. Then I smoked a bit of teh GANJA. Then I totally flipped out. In a good way of course. I'll be honest it's hard to control myself when I'm high and drunk. I've been getting the hang of it but it's a little tough, like ice-skating-with-butter-on-the-bottom-of-your-blades kinda tough. Wooh man. Apparently I could talk a great game though.
We go back to a friend of my friend's house and for some reason he ends up leaving me with a couple of other people. 2 guys and two girls.
Bla bla bla so the story goes both of them are virgins. On makes out with me and the two other guys and the whole night they're fighting over her (that's another goofy ass story. Sheesh). The other girl I get a little more cozy with and talk to her. So she tells me about WHY she's a virgin and allegedly the right guy hasn't come around to push her buttons the proper way. I tell her I use to be a virgin not so long ago and that when I lost it it was a wonderful thing and roses and gumdrops with dogs and cats dancing together yadda yadda. I suggested that she save her virginity for someone she's not going to just say "oh I guess he'll do" over. I wanted her to really listen to to me because most people regret their first time.
She didn't listen to me. As soon as the lights were off it was on. I worked her into (my special "tactics" tee hee hee) it and there was virtually no resistance. I was so drunk I didn't bother to ask if she wanted to go through with it. I regret that.
It gets explicit below the dotted lines, so don't read if you have church in the morning.
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I made her do everything. I stuck myself in and out of her a few times and it was ridiculous. I mean SILLY! Every time I pulled out or put it back in she shook really intensely, like my c0ck had tazer attached to the tip of it. When a girl spasms out with every thrust it's incredibly flattering. Like "hey! I'm actually making her convulse violently! Look at me go!"
Totally told her to suck me off. "I've never done that before." "Don't worry" I said. "You'll be really good at it." I've had a couple of BJs from girls who've never done them before and I'll tell you WHY I think they're telling the truth.
Girl's who've never done it before usually just suck and kiss the head a little bit. They never take any inch of it down their throats. It's still good as long as Thunder's Mushroom gets the attention it deserves.
Fingered her and....ahh, to paraphrase Julia Roberts from the movie Closer "We did everything that people who have sex do."
If this was her first experience I wanted her to enjoy herself with a pro. After it was all over she cuddled with me and said "Thank you. Why haven't I done this before?" I told her "you're not going to meet a lot of guys that have MY type of sexual, so good luck."
lawlf.
Here's the thing that was strange about it.
If this was her first time, then why wasn't there bleeding? She tells me she broke her hymen while horseback riding.
[SIZE=+2]HORSEBACK RIDING.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=+3]HORSEBACK RIDING.[/SIZE]
Uh..okay. We also did it in front of a dude who was passed the f*ck out on a couch across the room. We were properly covered. (as proper as you can get when bumping uglies) Why would a girl want to lose her virginity under those circumstances?
Morning came, got her number, yadda yadda. The end.
Okay, does anyone think that this girl WASN'T a virgin? She's friends with another girl that I had sex with last year and her whole house knew about it. Word gets around.
Do you think maybe I got a good reference?
It's something I'm curious about. What do you all think?
Now that I wasted 5 minutes typing out that first paragraph, (GODDAMMIT!) I'll get to this story.
Last Thursday I went down to USC to hang with some of my graduating friends. Most of the graduates took part in a ceremony called "the fountain run". All around campus there are like dozens of fountains and the students get down to their underwear and run around in it. Hundreds of naked, drunken bodies filled the small scattered fountains. It was a good time. No, I didn't go in. Not that I care that I didn't go in; I didn't have shorts. I wasn't drunk enough either. Boo hoo.
Later as the night went on I got drunk. Then I smoked a bit of teh GANJA. Then I totally flipped out. In a good way of course. I'll be honest it's hard to control myself when I'm high and drunk. I've been getting the hang of it but it's a little tough, like ice-skating-with-butter-on-the-bottom-of-your-blades kinda tough. Wooh man. Apparently I could talk a great game though.
We go back to a friend of my friend's house and for some reason he ends up leaving me with a couple of other people. 2 guys and two girls.
Bla bla bla so the story goes both of them are virgins. On makes out with me and the two other guys and the whole night they're fighting over her (that's another goofy ass story. Sheesh). The other girl I get a little more cozy with and talk to her. So she tells me about WHY she's a virgin and allegedly the right guy hasn't come around to push her buttons the proper way. I tell her I use to be a virgin not so long ago and that when I lost it it was a wonderful thing and roses and gumdrops with dogs and cats dancing together yadda yadda. I suggested that she save her virginity for someone she's not going to just say "oh I guess he'll do" over. I wanted her to really listen to to me because most people regret their first time.
She didn't listen to me. As soon as the lights were off it was on. I worked her into (my special "tactics" tee hee hee) it and there was virtually no resistance. I was so drunk I didn't bother to ask if she wanted to go through with it. I regret that.
It gets explicit below the dotted lines, so don't read if you have church in the morning.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
I made her do everything. I stuck myself in and out of her a few times and it was ridiculous. I mean SILLY! Every time I pulled out or put it back in she shook really intensely, like my c0ck had tazer attached to the tip of it. When a girl spasms out with every thrust it's incredibly flattering. Like "hey! I'm actually making her convulse violently! Look at me go!"
Totally told her to suck me off. "I've never done that before." "Don't worry" I said. "You'll be really good at it." I've had a couple of BJs from girls who've never done them before and I'll tell you WHY I think they're telling the truth.
Girl's who've never done it before usually just suck and kiss the head a little bit. They never take any inch of it down their throats. It's still good as long as Thunder's Mushroom gets the attention it deserves.
Fingered her and....ahh, to paraphrase Julia Roberts from the movie Closer "We did everything that people who have sex do."
If this was her first experience I wanted her to enjoy herself with a pro. After it was all over she cuddled with me and said "Thank you. Why haven't I done this before?" I told her "you're not going to meet a lot of guys that have MY type of sexual, so good luck."
lawlf.
Here's the thing that was strange about it.
If this was her first time, then why wasn't there bleeding? She tells me she broke her hymen while horseback riding.
[SIZE=+2]HORSEBACK RIDING.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=+3]HORSEBACK RIDING.[/SIZE]
Uh..okay. We also did it in front of a dude who was passed the f*ck out on a couch across the room. We were properly covered. (as proper as you can get when bumping uglies) Why would a girl want to lose her virginity under those circumstances?
Morning came, got her number, yadda yadda. The end.
Okay, does anyone think that this girl WASN'T a virgin? She's friends with another girl that I had sex with last year and her whole house knew about it. Word gets around.
Do you think maybe I got a good reference?
It's something I'm curious about. What do you all think?
