Found out reason for a flake

[h_amati]

Hi,

I met a girl and she gave me her number. We went out to dinner and had a great time, she didn't want to leave.

Have kept contact via text, she always answers immediately and nicely.

On Wednesday I asked her on a date, she said friday night, asked me pick her up. She wanted friday because she will leave for the weekend to a nearby town.

Today I get a text telling me she is sorry she needs to cancel because she is leaving friday instead of saturday. She told me she was feeling terrible about cancelling and that next week we can see each other any day I want. I told her not to worry about it and didn't pick a day for rescheduling. I kept it c&f and ambiguos.

Later I found out via her twitter that her best female friends made some last minute plans for friday nite and they were all going. This is the real reason that she flaked. She doesn't know I can see her tweets.

How would you handle this?. Would you give her another chance?.

 

[Johnnyventana]

"Accidentally" show up at said location with hotter chick.

In any case, she clearly is happier seeing her girlfriends, than you. How happy does that make you? Next.

 

[JPlaya]

I would next her lol that sucks

 

[Iceberg]

On one hand, you're just some dude she met. So you can't expect her to drop everything for the opportunity to date you.

On the other hand, f**k that. If this broad makes a plan, she should keep it.

What I do in this situation is, keep the information/knowledge in my back pocket. It's good for keeping your image of this girl off any pedestal. Now arrange another date, have some fun, and treat her like the common wh0re she is.

Maybe I'm just a cynical bastard, but I like having dirt on people. That way, when I end up flaking on the girl, because I found a prospect who's more likely to f**k, I don't feel bad, like I'm hurting her feelings.

Anyway, spin her like any other plate. She's not your girlfriend anyway, so don't expect loyalty. Use her for fun, just like you should be for ALL women at the early stages.

 

[cstrife32]

If you want to hang out with her next week then do it, otherwise don't. Don't over complicate things. If she continues to flake then definitely drop her. I like the 2 strike rule. After all, everybody deserves a second chance. She also counter offered with a lot of enthusiasm, but women can never be taken for their word, especially ones you don't know too well.

 

[h_amati]

She did strike me as being honest, all BS now.

I've known her for a month and only gone once on a date with her.

She is very nice and very single, hangs around divorced/single women all the time. She attended a couple of weddings in the last few weeks. One was a friend's wedding and the other was family wedding, she posted pictures of both events, her friends posted pictures of her too. She didn't seem to be with a guy in any of them.

I won't hang out with her next week, it seems pathetic to take her offer for any day I want.

 

[Zerro]

On one hand, you're just some dude she met. So you can't expect her to drop everything for the opportunity to date you.

On the other hand, f**k that. If this broad makes a plan, she should keep it.

What I do in this situation is, keep the information/knowledge in my back pocket. It's good for keeping your image of this girl off any pedestal. Now arrange another date, have some fun, and treat her like the common wh0re she is.

Maybe I'm just a cynical bastard, but I like having dirt on people. That way, when I end up flaking on the girl, because I found a prospect who's more likely to f**k, I don't feel bad, like I'm hurting her feelings.

Anyway, spin her like any other plate. She's not your girlfriend anyway, so don't expect loyalty. Use her for fun, just like you should be for ALL women at the early stages.

Iceberg has the best answer in my opinion, though I like Johnny's as well. But overall don't expect any loyalty at all from a new woman.

Some chicks are just brazenly (or stupidly) dishonest. I remember one girl who gave me an excuse for flaking and saying that she couldn't go out that night, only to be tagged at an event on Facebook just a couple hours later by a mutual friend.

 

[yuppaz]

I would go with Icebergs advice. Gotta say you only had one date with her, so she is by no means "Yours" at that point, and it's reasonable to cancel a date in favor of something else....but I would also be salty that she lied like it was nothing. I would just be in it to f*ck her at that point as well. You would have a hard time trusting her after such a bad start, so not much sense in thinking relationship thoughts....

 

[Trump]

Hi,

I met a girl and she gave me her number. We went out to dinner and had a great time, she didn't want to leave.

Have kept contact via text, she always answers immediately and nicely.

On Wednesday I asked her on a date, she said friday night, asked me pick her up. She wanted friday because she will leave for the weekend to a nearby town.

Today I get a text telling me she is sorry she needs to cancel because she is leaving friday instead of saturday. She told me she was feeling terrible about cancelling and that next week we can see each other any day I want. I told her not to worry about it and didn't pick a day for rescheduling.

Later I found out via her twitter that her best female friends made some last minute plans for friday nite and they were all going. This is the real reason that she flaked. She doesn't know I can see her tweets.

How would you handle this?. Would you give her another chance?.

Not sure what is meant by "handle this." She obviously thought she would have more fun with her female friends. Calling her on it won't raise her interest level.

It's not up to you to ask us if you should give her another shot, it's up to her to ask you for a reschedule of the date.

The best motivator is a guilty conscience.

 

[h_amati]

She did say she was very sorry and that I please forgive her. She then said I pick any day next week. I didn't reply to her offer.

I'm in just to f*ck her, this is really my question...am I handling this right?

 

[ladyzman]

Honestly why are you even following her on twitter to see what she's up to. That's kinda creepy bro, like Zerro following a girl's face book page. I met a girl yesterday who doesn't want to talk to me any more. Think it's cause I asked for her fb (first thing I texted the girl after getting her number) I just wanted to see some pictures of her but realised later how creepy that might have come off to her.. stalker status creey. My opinion is you're investing too much emotionally (you're caring too much). A rule of thumb is to not start caring about a woman until after you've had sex with her. Easier said than done, but it's important. Cause..

Here's how women think: Guys who catch feelings for us before getting to know us are creepy... or at the very least, a turn off. Checking a girl's twits to see if she's telling the truth is something a bf can do or someone exclusive. Not someone who went on a date with the girl once. What you need to do is not give a fudge sickle about her. If she says I can't make it, say "cool, no problem" if you want to use the opportunity to create more value for yourself while laying down the law to turn her on, say "Cool, no problem but don't let it happen again " If she has half a brain, she'll know you're joking around while taking in your point that you don't take **** and she'll get turned on by it.

So stop following her on twitter, and dont give a fudge pop until after you've tasted her honey nectar.

 

[h_amati]

My FB is cancelled and I don't have a twitter account either. This chick's twitter account is public. All her tweets and pictures for the world to see.

I acted all cool when she texted she couldn't make it. I even joked with her and didn't take her counter offer. She is going on a trip next week, I just wonder if I should cut all contact for a couple of weeks until she returns or keep contact as if nothing happened.

 

[SgtSplacker]

On one hand, you're just some dude she met. So you can't expect her to drop everything for the opportunity to date you.

On the other hand, f**k that. If this broad makes a plan, she should keep it.

What I do in this situation is, keep the information/knowledge in my back pocket. It's good for keeping your image of this girl off any pedestal. Now arrange another date, have some fun, and treat her like the common wh0re she is.

Maybe I'm just a cynical bastard, but I like having dirt on people. That way, when I end up flaking on the girl, because I found a prospect who's more likely to f**k, I don't feel bad, like I'm hurting her feelings.

Anyway, spin her like any other plate. She's not your girlfriend anyway, so don't expect loyalty. Use her for fun, just like you should be for ALL women at the early stages.

TOTALLY

There is one rule I play by in a relationship and that is that the relationship must be EVEN, what she can do I can do no exceptions (not even once). In this case I would just mention to her that she popped up on your twitter in the friendliest way, ask her if she had fun and just give her a chance to explain herself. Maybe there is a good reason for what she did. Next time you see fit to cancel plans or go back on anything you have going with her, she better be cool with it. If not just mention that you thought you had a more flexible relationship because after all she has broken plans with you before right? No anger, no cornering, no attitude, just a man trying to establish the kind of relationship you have with someone with the intention of making things fair.

Quite honestly I prefer this kind of thing to happen at least once. I think a relationship where nobody feels obligated to do anything is best. Because if someone is straight up with me then I am obligated to be the same way with them and that can be a pain in the arse sometimes. Give me liberty, or give me death!

 

[Poonani Maker]

I'd move on, plenty of fish in the sea. She's obviously a rotted, dotted shore gar fish. Let her swim with the water moccasins the rest of her pathetic wedding-crasher life.

Seriously dude, This goes for ANY woman who says, "Oh, I'm leaving a day earlier than I expect..." or the like. They are ALL lying.

 

[Poonani Maker]

But if she contacts you again (don't think that she will), don't answer, don't make Any effort...she Must crawl to your doorstep now (which ain't gonna happen, so see this one as dead to your life), and only then, would you Use her for a fvck, much less long term or marriage material..she's already lied to you once lol Multiply that by 99 and you'll have a weekly count of lies she'll tell you while in a long-term relationship with her.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

She lied, girls lie. Just keep this in your mind and make sure to not wife her up because she probably is a habitual liar. Just make sure that from now on she comes with 110% co-operation and then your good. Don't spend money or nothing on her. You bring her to the crib, watch som netflix and get it poppin. This girl ain't worth a penny.

 

[Zerro]

Honestly why are you even following her on twitter to see what she's up to. That's kinda creepy bro, like Zerro following a girl's face book page.

Reading a status update that popped up in my news feed isn't creepy. I don't even bother to look at a chicks profile beyond her relationship status.

 

[h_amati]

All this talk has got me thinking about a male friend of mine. He is divorced and has multiple girls around him, some chase him, some do not. And with enough patience she has f*cked several of them. The girl he really likes, the one he makes an effort for is treating him like sh*t.

Is it really worth being so strict about how a girl behaves or not?. You don't wanna marry or have a relationship with them all. All you have to is lose is some of your time and some money.

I just like the way my friend takes it easy with the majority and doesn't read a lot into them.

 

[Iceberg]

All this talk has got me thinking about a male friend of mine. He is divorced and has multiple girls around him, some chase him, some do not. And with enough patience she has f*cked several of them. The girl he really likes, the one he makes an effort for is treating him like sh*t.

Is it really worth being so strict about how a girl behaves or not?. You don't wanna marry or have a relationship with them all. All you have to is lose is some of your time and some money.

I just like the way my friend takes it easy with the majority and doesn't read a lot into them.

No it's not. That's why I suggested that you proceed going after her, just with the reality of knowing that she's not going to be some type of loyal, long term girlfriend. Just some fun.

This stuff with women...it's a hobby. Not a career. This is the fun stuff you focus on that gets your mind off the REAL sh*t in your life. In fact, that's where guys screw up - they treat these girls like there's some real outcome invested in it. As if it really matters if some girl calls you back or whatever.

Your friend seems to be setting a good example. Follow his lead.

 

[SgtSplacker]

"Is it really worth being so strict about how a girl behaves or not?"

Well... kind of.

It all depends on the relationship you have with her. If she expects you to be a chivalrous door opening tab paying guy then yes, she needs to play by your rules.

If she's super laid back, doesn't really expect anything and enjoys throwing you a BJ every once in a while when she's in a good mood, then she can do anything she damn well pleases.

In my opinion it's important to make a girl respect you by telling her what makes you happy and giving her the option to please you. And you kind of HAVE to play these kind of games to keep her interested. If you let her walk all over you it's not a challenge for her and she will loose interest. The last thing a girl wants is a boring relationship where the guy is cool with everything she does. Think soap operas...