Found out gf is trying to move out!

[syemour]

I found out that my girlfriend whom I live with is trying to move out on the sneak in December. I haven't said anything yet as I've just discovered this a few hours ago. We've been going out for about a year and have lived together for 2 years.

Her birthday was yesterday and she didn't even invite me...which was a huge red flag!!! Cancelled our dinner for tonight....She's a completely different person LOL.

How do I play this going forward? I do not care about winning her back I just want to convey Im better off without her.

 

[Greasy Pig]

I advocate a preemptive strike. Dump the bytch first. Don't tell her you found out her secret. Just tell her to take her shyt and get out.
She'll try to blame you but don't listen.
If you let her execute her plan, she leaves on her terms and with all the power. This is a priceless opportunity.

 

[Die Hard]

She's a completely different person LOL.

Normally, guys are sad and losing their minds when their girls do this. Yet you LOL... I think that's awesome!

Anyway, I think you shouldn't try to show her that you're BETTER OFF without her.
I think you should try to show her that you feel just fine whether you're with her or without her, like it's all the same to you.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Seymour,
I am like Diehard,impressed with the dignified way you are handling all this....Not so much a matter of what you can learn from others but what posters here can learn from you....Though I would take GP's line and kick her out now...that doesn't make it right or smart,we are just showing our tribal ancestry LOL...No just see it through to the end,I hope there is no money involved....
Learn?....Never let them park their slippers under your bed unless you feel you want children...a fellow Don Juan makes a good Flatmate!...I lived with three such people years ago,wonderful meals,wild parties,Women moving from bed to bed in the middle of the Night...lottsa fun,looking back on this will make my old ribs rattle before I draw my last
breath LOL!

 

[VladPatton]

I advocate a preemptive strike. Dump the bytch first. Don't tell her you found out her secret. Just tell her to take her shyt and get out.
She'll try to blame you but don't listen.
If you let her execute her plan, she leaves on her terms and with all the power. This is a priceless opportunity.

This! ↑↑↑↑↑↑↑ 100%!

Beat her to the punch and tell her to get her shıt out of your place ASAP. Don't even let her see it coming. Talk about the day, laugh, be all cutesy with her and then just say "oh, and by the way, can you do me a favor? Collect all of your shıt and get the fück outta here!"

That's some nice Shock and Awe!

 

[backbreaker]

dude this is well past you trying to get back with her or "power struggles" or "keeping frame" or any of that ****. she's already dumped you

the only reason she is staying with you now is out of convenience; she doesn't want to be homeless and needs to put up with you until december.

put her **** on the porch and change the locks. like right now.

 

[Desdinova]

I found out that my girlfriend whom I live with is trying to move out on the sneak in December.

While she's not home, throw all her 5hit outside your place and change the locks.

The only reason for women to do something like this is if they're in a highly abusive relationship. If you're not beating the fvck out of her, then there's no reason for her to hide this from you. She should be respectful in how you're going to be left with paying for everything by yourself.

When I discovered my ex-wife was planning to leave me, I ended up terminating the marriage first. When she started playing the victim, I never gave into it. She would cry and was asking "is this what you really want?" I genuinely discovered what kind of a person she was.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Can you really legally throw someone out on the street just like that? I would tend to doubt it.

 

[syemour]

While she's not home, throw all her 5hit outside your place and change the locks.

The only reason for women to do something like this is if they're in a highly abusive relationship. If you're not beating the fvck out of her, then there's no reason for her to hide this from you. She should be respectful in how you're going to be left with paying for everything by yourself.

When I discovered my ex-wife was planning to leave me, I ended up terminating the marriage first. When she started playing the victim, I never gave into it. She would cry and was asking "is this what you really want?" I genuinely discovered what kind of a person she was.

Im not abusive in anyway. Nor am I perfect but she was saying something about marriage and kids-and thats not me at this point in my life.

 

[Bible_Belt]

You can't throw her out if her name is on the lease. Even if it was not, she can still make a stink about it, saying she had an oral agreement with you and you are evicting her without using the legal process.

 

[backbreaker]

i know in Arkansas you have squat rights if you live there for 6 months or something like that. anyway i kicked the ***** out and she left lol that's all i know.

i'd kick her out and let things sort themselves out.

 

[Boilermaker]

Whoa ...

What's with the animosity?

Mentally move on. And the first step to that is simulating indifference, until it feels and becomes real.

I would stop all communications, cold turkey. Wouldn't tell her anything. Wouldn't acknowledge her.

 

[PlayHer Man]

Spin plates.

At this point she is worthless to you. Act accordingly.

The first thing you should do is tell her ITS OVER. Tell her you want to start f*cking other women and you believe the relationship has peaked.

Then do it.

I agree with Greasy Pig.

 

[Married Buried]

You cannot just throw her stuff in the yard and change the locks. You could get charged and arrested. You need to just face her. Tell her it's over and you have found someone else you want to be with. Tell her to make plans to get out, and walk away.

 

[amoka]

Just like others have said, it is against the law to evict someone from his/her place of residence without proper notice. What I'd do is to have her pay for next month's rent even if you can take care of it all by yourself. I am sure it is not her intentions to pay for December's rent which is why she's trying to sneak out. Take that money from her and let her scrabble.

 

[origin138]

Whoa ...

What's with the animosity?

Mentally move on. And the first step to that is simulating indifference, until it feels and becomes real.

I would stop all communications, cold turkey. Wouldn't tell her anything. Wouldn't acknowledge her.

Agree with this 100%. It's tempting to go for the throat with something like this, but don't forget how women feed off emotional drama. She'll also use it against you. The less talk, the better. Stay in control.

Don't reason with her, don't talk to her, just make your decisions without her in the picture. If that involves you leaving/moving, then figure out what your obligations are (legal obligations with regard to your lease) and do what you need to do.

Like Backbreaker said, she's already broken it off and is just saving her own a$$ at this point. In her brain, it's better (safer) for her to use you out of convenience than to deal with the big mean world alone. Do her a favor and do a fade away of your own

 

[The Duke]

Set her stuff on the front lawn and light it on fire.

 

[switch]

dude this is well past you trying to get back with her or "power struggles" or "keeping frame" or any of that ****. she's already dumped you

the only reason she is staying with you now is out of convenience; she doesn't want to be homeless and needs to put up with you until december.

put her **** on the porch and change the locks. like right now.

hahahha i would do that :cheer:

 

[Mr.Positive]

Personally, I would have two goals in this situation, first for her to move out as soon as possible, and secondly, to keep drama to an absolute minimum.

December is just next month, so I don't see any reason to stir up the pot. Either keep quiet about it, or tell her you know that she is going to move out. Tell her you think it's a good idea as well, and offer to help speed up the transition.

Just don't create any unnecessary drama in your home. Nothing good can come out of that.

 

[pierce_r]

dude this is well past you trying to get back with her or "power struggles" or "keeping frame" or any of that ****. she's already dumped you.

This. It's all over. Everything else is just details.

Tell her to get her stuff and get out, tonight. If she can't get her stuff out for logistics reasons, tell her you're putting whatever she doesn't take with her, tonight, in the garage and she can come get it when she's ready. No drama, no crying. Just "Goodbye. "Come get your **** when you find a truck."

BTW, I tried this once with a girl many, many years ago -- very similar thing; she'd moved in with me a couple of months prior but wanted to spend her birthday with "her friends" -- and, sensing a grave disturbance in The Force, I broke it off. The next weekend, her other boyfriend came to my place to get her stuff.

Turns out she'd been dating both of us for months. She'd told him that we were just roommates even though my condo, as he quickly learned, had only one bedroom. He had to take her underwear and a pair of fuzzy pink handcuffs out of my second dresser drawer. It ended up with him drinking a beer and crying on my deck. It really sucked.

I'm not saying this is what she's doing, but be prepared for anything.

Get it over with.