peace 4 ever and always, respect for the replies given, they are very good one's.
to the 2nd reply i don't really think i have a self esteem problem. i used to have one before and i grew out of it with time. i actually have some female friends. when they get to know me they actually like me but most of the time they are in relationships already so nothing happens. i'm just not able to catch a break. i have seen people worse than me....with girls i like so i don't know what to say..i just have no luck.
to the 4th post you are right in the past few months i have actually not approached but that is the result of having pretty much given up. i used to approach quite frequently before and was met with rejection after rejection. i did not mind at first because i always assumed it was just one no away from a yes but that did not turn out to be the case, i was wrong. instead i have grown up (i am in my 20's) to see all my family and friends -who were worse than me even- grow up and have somebody, some had more than one. i have come to the conclusion that some people just aren't meant for it. how else can you explain it? i have done everything from read different material on my own to ask other people's opinions, esp. those far more competent on what to do. it sounded like it made sene but alas was not the case for me. i have never been totally blown out, had a few rough rejections, but most weren't so severe. still a man can only take being told "sorry, i have a boyfriend" "you are a great guy with a good heart, someday you will meet someone who appreciates you" why yes, when i am in my grave. mean while the woman who says it is single and looking but goes and says something like that. i mean i dont care but at least be honest about it, i won't get hurt, i am used to it. i also forgot to mention this is if the said women are feeling particular generous because most of the time i dont even get a second look. i am completely invisible most of the time wherever i go where there are women. i feel that nothing short of fame or money is going to help me because there is something about me that causes them to not like me. most girls do talk to me, but when it comes to anything romantic, it's a no go. i've started wondering if it's my looks, it might be, even tho i always considered myself to be no better or worse than the majority of men i come across. but i guess women just don't like my look i don't know.
to the 3rd poster that is a very good link, thank you, i read it. i do agree with what you said about confidence. that is the best thing to personally posess, with confidence you can do the unthinkable. reading that article you gave me and your words helped me to realize that there is a life outside of women. truthfully i have been on this site since 2003 and as much as i hate to say it, it's proven not very helpful. that's not to say i didn't learn a whole deal, i learned very much about women from the various posts and the many users experience with them. for someone to say this site is valueless like some have before is wrong. rather that old saying comes to mind "you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink" it's up for the person to take in the information and apply it. i am thankful i came across it because otherwise i would've still been asleep and like some people who make women out to be something they are not. in this respect i have grown a lot. now as far as proven useful in getting just one special woman in my life that i liked, which is all i really wanted? I have to say I am still in the same position I was before I came. Oh I approached, I tried ****y and funny, I tried all the various techniques proposed, but it just didn't work for me. Didn't matter whether I took the risk and approached really attractive looking one's or normal looking one's, they didn't care and it failed. Just didn't work.
They just don't like me and one thing I know is you CAN'T force anyone to like you. For this reason I will not launch into a tirade and condemn or disrespect them for their choice in turning me down. I did before years ago when I was still immature but after growing up I realized this is infantile behavior and no one is owed anything when it comes to dating & attraction. If they happened to say yes all these years I would be singing a different tune and wouldn't have to resort to it, therein lying the hypocrisy. They just don't like me and that is there choice and I don't think they should be forced to give me a chance out of pity, what would be the point? No one should be forced to do something or like someone when it's against their will. All these experiences collectively have made me realize the writing is on the wall. By that I mean I am an epic failure with women and am just no longer going to bother. Why fight something I've known for the longest time but didn't want to come to grips with? I've reached an age where I'm expected to know these things and if I did happen to find someone she'd probably think me strange for not even knowing the basic steps. I am going to concentrate on myself and look into different hobbies, pursue things that will help me grow as a person and hopefully fill in the void of the lack of women.
I see no other alternative because when you've already tried everything, short of being a celebrity, you have to come to grips with the fact it's just not meant to happen. The last thing I want to do is continue to occupy my mind with this wondering "why" "why "why", being bitter and angry until I die. I just don't want to do it. Some just aren't so lucky. As we know there there's been plenty of people who've never had someone before and they won't be the last, I guess that was just the fate that was decided for me. Just stating where I am mentally at. Peace and respect to all throughout the years, for listening and trying to offer a helping hand. And good luck on your particular journeys.
