For the guys doing online dating

[MRomeo99]

I will have to admit that you guys did hit it on the head with the online dating thing, and one of it's greatest weaknesses. You can't judge chemistry from an online interaction.

The first thing you have to do is accelerate. I used to IM for a month or two before I would see someone(5 years ago). Now, I'll IM once or twice, then I want the phone number. And I'll try to squeeze them in for a date within 2 weeks. Any longer than that, and you run too many risks of having a distorted meeting.

I have irrationally gotten attached to people through excellent IM/email/phone conversations, only to get together and no chemistry(the weakness I talked about). But, then again I have met a FB that I wasn't conventionally attracted to, but was very sexually attracted, great chemistry, even if I would never take her out in public.

One hint. SAVE EVERY IM CONVERSATION. I save them all, and then re-read them before I get together with them. It's too easy to get confused when you are chatting up 5-10 women. Don't ask me how I know this.

So, as far as the Chemistry thing goes it's kind of hit or miss. But, I guess it's much like that in real life too. I met this hooter's girl while I was wasted one night. Took her out to dinner two nights later, couldn't even make it through appetizers she was so freaking stupid.

MR

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by DJ_Dork


I did online dating once, met a girl.. no chemistry. Met another girl... no chemistry. On paper she sounds fun and interesting, in person.. it just did not cut it.

This is why the NAYSAYERS prefer real in person dating and this is a better and faster way of meeting women.

I'm assuming that you're saying that meeting women from the Net is faster. For example, during a 15 minute coffee break at work I can reply to 4-5 emails from online women. I can make a date with two this week, dates with two others for next week and either get the phone number of the fifth one to chat with her to determine if she's worth meeting or just send her a "Dear Jane" letter. Four dates in 15 minutes! And this is a bad AFC thing why?

 

[frivolousz21]

you said 2 weeks for the date.

yes you can have more volume because you arent using the phone and ur memory as much.

but as for going faster. If you meet in person...you can exstablish everything the moment you meet..exp the "in person" chemistry.

you will have the 1st date probably within 2 to 4 days of meeting her.


regardless the point is...if you are an AFC....and your at this site to meet women..and you settle for meeting them online.

what are u accomplisling?

that was the point of this thread

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by MRomeo99


The first thing you have to do is accelerate. I used to IM for a month or two before I would see someone(5 years ago). Now, I'll IM once or twice, then I want the phone number. And I'll try to squeeze them in for a date within 2 weeks. Any longer than that, and you run too many risks of having a distorted meeting.

I have irrationally gotten attached to people through excellent IM/email/phone conversations, only to get together and no chemistry(the weakness I talked about). But, then again I have met a FB that I wasn't conventionally attracted to, but was very sexually attracted, great chemistry, even if I would never take her out in public.

One hint. SAVE EVERY IM CONVERSATION. I save them all, and then re-read them before I get together with them. It's too easy to get confused when you are chatting up 5-10 women. Don't ask me how I know this.

MR

These three concepts are huge in being successful with meeting women online. In a nutshell they are:

1.) Strike quick, if she doesn't want to meet you soon she has a low IL.

2.) Don't fall for cyber-chemistry, it's the same thing as when women read romance novels, it can all be a fantasy until you meet her.

3.) When you meet, refer to past IMs, conversations or profiles. Use them to further qualify her and determine if she's a faking flake.

MR, you and I should teach a class about this and make a boatload!

 

[Marcopolo]

These guys are right-actually meeting them is crucial. Even modern science has shown this to be true. Various studies have been done showing that smell does in fact have an effect on attraction for both sides, as well as all the other factors such as in -person personality and such.

Here is an article discusing this-

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/1772789.stm

That being said, the internet can be a great way of making initial contact (it has easily tripled the number of quality women I meet, believe it or not). However, there is no genuine attraction until you meet, so excessive letter writing and forming an online "relationship" really is a waste of time.

 

[MRomeo99]

regardless the point is...if you are an AFC....and your at this site to meet women..and you settle for meeting them online.

what are u accomplisling?

See, you keep saying you're fine with the online thing, and then you say this.

If I meet a girl online, and I meet a girl at Walmart, and a week later she's in my bed. What exactly is the difference? Am I supposed to feel bad about that? Am I supposed to feel like I'm less of a man? I had three dates this week, and it's only Thursday. When exactly am I supposed to feel like less of a man, or like such an AFC because I didn't go out and approach these women at a Walmart? Just be honest with yourself and me Friv, you truly do believe that online macking is for losers. I know that's your position, however I see it as a denial of yet another tool to get what we want.

I went out with a girl I met online last night. When I was on her couch, she felt perfectly real to me. I tried not to enjoy it too much, but she was too much fun. Then when I wake up in the morning. I had three new emails from girls that emailed me while I was out. So, apparently I was online sarging even while I'm out with my blonde cutie.

I think you need to realize Friv that what YOU are trying to accomplish has nothing to do with what I'm trying to accomplish or anyone else is trying to accomplish.

Personally, I don't like little girls. I like women that are smart and interesting. I don't really care where I meet them. I have a profile set up to ensure that I continually get a stream of interesting women emailing me. That works for me. I also am fairly friendly, so I meet a lot of people out. I don't do a whole lot of cold approaches. I usually just meet groups, and use my ever expanding social circle to find other prospects.

I hear what you're saying, however I just think you're wrong, and you just have gotten it yet. And if you would have seen some of the things I have done with some of the women I have done it with, you'd be amazed. But, I guess it's easier to think it can't be done, than realize it's a numbers game just like sarging IRL.

You're also missing something very subtle that I use online. I setup the relationship first online. If I don't like where it's going, I eject. But, I like girls that are fun, that are sarcastic and witty. Who can take as much **** as I love to give out, and give it right back to me. By the time I meet someone, I usually have about 2-3 hours invested in them, sometimes more, sometimes less. But, the dates are usually pretty fun. We're not stretching for conversation, because we've already talked about quite a few things. I usually know before we go out that we'll have fun, what I have less of a control of is whether I will feel chemistry.

And you can't even imagine how easy it is sometimes to bed these women. They open up SO QUICKLY online, and then if you want, you can accelerate pretty quickly. There have been more than a fair share that I swear just used ME. Which by the way, didn't suck. And on occasion ones that are inviting you over within a few hours of you meeting them(wrap that jimmy boys). Overall, it's fun, and interesting, and frustrating, and overall pretty darn effective. Your mileage may vary.

However, don't assume that because I use online as a tool to meet women that I don't have game elsewhere. I'm probably best in bridging to the next step, acceleration, and increasing attraction. I am very good at establishing rapport, and making them attracted.

R

 

[MRomeo99]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
These three concepts are huge in being successful with meeting women online. In a nutshell they are:

1.) Strike quick, if she doesn't want to meet you soon she has a low IL.

2.) Don't fall for cyber-chemistry, it's the same thing as when women read romance novels, it can all be a fantasy until you meet her.

3.) When you meet, refer to past IMs, conversations or profiles. Use them to further qualify her and determine if she's a faking flake.

MR, you and I should teach a class about this and make a boatload!

Honestly you're right. I have been guilty in the past of waiting too long. I used to think it was better to develop that interest online, then move it to phone and then to meeting. Now, I realize that you can really meet up with them in a very short period of time. I think it has changed too. 5-6 years ago when I used to do it, it was more accepted that it was a slow process. Now, they will often offer me their phone number within the first few interactions. If not, I do the DD thing "Give me your phone number, I gotta run but I want to talk to you for just a while longer." Without fail they will give it up.

Teaching a class would be fun. Not like I have freaking time.

MR

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by MRomeo99
...I hear what you're saying, however I just think you're wrong, and you just have gotten it yet. And if you would have seen some of the things I have done with some of the women I have done it with, you'd be amazed. But, I guess it's easier to think it can't be done, than realize it's a numbers game just like sarging IRL...
R

I said it before and I'll say it again, people only believe what they can understand...

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by MRomeo99
...Now, they will often offer me their phone number within the first few interactions. If not, I do the DD thing "Give me your phone number, I gotta run but I want to talk to you for just a while longer." Without fail they will give it up. ...

Same here. All I do is suggest that we should do something and bingo, they offer their number. It's almost like shooting fish in a barrel once you've qualified them.

It's nice being able to use several different tools in your arsenal. It makes it easier to have a steady stream of women contacting you when you use several avenues in meeting women. Like you said, it's just hard finding time to do other things once you start accumulating a large list of interested females.