flowers to her at work.... ?

[kyokon]

I've been seeing this girl for a few months now, but only in the last few weeks did I really come to like her a lot. We have shagged a couple of times and when we are together it seems like she really likes me but during the week when we can't meet she barely contacts me (but replies to my contacting). She understands that we're not an item and although I've dropped small hints about us getting together properly, I've kept them small in the hope that she might initiate. Also I still had one other feminine yummy that I wanted to do first She doesn't seem very expressive on the whole so it's a little hard to figure out what she thinks but I get the feeling she thinks I am just a player, she knows I have met other girls on the net and she mentioned some hair found in my bed which didn't appear to be hers (it wasn't).
Anyway, tomorrow is her birthday and I have the day off work for a couple of job interviews. While I am in my suit which she said she wanted to see me wearing sometime, I'm thinking to get some flowers for her and take them into her at work. I might try that 'kissing her hand' thing as well. I'd love to do this in front of as many people as possible, so she will be highly embarrassed at the time but hopefully appreciate it afterwards.
Is it too much, does it take away challenge and put the ball in her court?
I have decided that she is a real quality girl and definitely worth trying hard for, and after 3 months things oughta be moving on some more...
(by the way shagging is no big deal in the social climate here, don't read too much into that)

 

[fm2]

I'm thinking that if she only wants to be FBs, flowers and all that might drive her away. Ignore her for a bit, see what happens. See if she does start contacting you. If she doesn't, then she would have never wanted to be anything more than just a sex partner and you can move on with the other chicks you've met (or are soon to meet!!)

 

[Aztec]

Nice romantic gesture, Kyokon. Here's the thing, if she doesn't want to hook up with you as an item, that is telling you something. Back up! Otherwise you will push her away more.


If you think that the reason she wouldn't go LTR with you is because she thinks "U R da playapimp", show her things that will reduce her thoughts about that. Like making sure that you don't leave evidence of other hos that step into your flat (ie leaving hair, panties, etc).


And man please, I hope you don't do that kiss her hand in public thing. Come on, man!

 

[jakethasnake]

Dude, can't you tell that she's just curious to try some gajin dyck? You should know that while it's very popular and "in" for a Japanese man or woman to fvck some white person for kicks, they are still very racist to any non-Japanese, as a general rule. I'm not saying this to be rude, it's just true. Same goes for many Europeans. They'll go slumming for black ass or go exotic for some Oriental dyck, but the usually intend to marry their own. Fun and serious commitment are neatly compartmentalized for them, often along lines of nationality, if they're dealing with IRs. None of it spills over into one another.

 

[vdk]

O so true Jake. I'm an Asian living in Australia and had a fair share of chasing 'white' tail and them chasing me, but in all my experiences its just for fun.

Back to your post, I agree with a poster that you should pull back. For some reason in life, when you pull away from something it comes to you, and vice versa - what a strage world we live in.

 

[jakethasnake]

Well vdk, I wasn't actually ENDORSING such behavior. It's actually quite bigoted, but hey - that's the world for you. Insularity and invisible prejudice won't disappear overnight, despite all the fanfare of Liberals.

 

[Walden]

There's no point staying as laymates if you actually want an LTR.
Go with the flowers thing , it's money.

 

[MacdaddyJr]

Don't do it man. You don't want her to think you're attached to her. If she is just a fvck buddy then I say continue on. lol

Don't push things, if it happens then great, if it doesn't, then move on.

 

[kyokon]

thanks for the opinions...
well, a friend told me that it would be putting her on the spot too much so I decided not to do it. I just asked in advance if she wanted to have lunch but she was super busy all day and wasnt even going to be at that office so lucky i didnt waste my time going in there.

i have run into gaijin-dyck-taste-testers before but I don't think she is one of them. actually i'm pretty optimistic that a relationship is on the cards since she has told all her friends (and her mum!) about me, brings me presents + stuff often, changed a few things about herself that I mentioned i didn't like, and is very hard to get rid of the day after screwing...

anyway we'll be going out on sunday so... see what happens

 

[selfcontrol]

If you do the flowers thing at work, you're automatically pegged as AFC. She'll see you as her provider, rather than her lover.

And given that she's not interested in having you as a provider, it means that you're history if you give her the ****ing flowers. Don't do it!!

 

[Aztec]

Originally posted by kyokon
thanks for the opinions...
well, a friend told me that it would be putting her on the spot too much so I decided not to do it. I just asked in advance if she wanted to have lunch but she was super busy all day and wasnt even going to be at that office so lucky i didnt waste my time going in there.

i have run into gaijin-dyck-taste-testers before but I don't think she is one of them. actually i'm pretty optimistic that a relationship is on the cards since she has told all her friends (and her mum!) about me, brings me presents + stuff often, changed a few things about herself that I mentioned i didn't like, and is very hard to get rid of the day after screwing...

anyway we'll be going out on sunday so... see what happens

Then go with the flow