Flint's Improvement Journal

[flint]

Alright so a few things to talk about. First off me and a really good friend of mine (who also has great game) went to NYC a few nights ago to this club with a few people. Tons of beautiful women everywhere, it was nuts. I also realized that it takes A game to succeed in NYC. I mean literally that's where the pros go.

Anyways when we got there it was difficult to open with a lot of the sets because a lot of the people there knew each other and I knew nobody. But since I knew nobody I took that as an opportunity to meet people and use it to open.

Set One:

I would go up to a set and ask them something about the city, or whose party it was, or something like that. Basically the first set I opened was good because I got a few laughs and everything. It was these three girls dancing around some dude friend of their's. I pinpointed one of them but made sure that her friends were laughing too to make sure they liked me. It went well but somehow we got seperated since there were a lot of people, oh well.

Set Two:

The second set I opened were these chicks sitting on the couch. They answered my questions and talked to me but sort of did so in a friendly way, and then they sort of got occupied in a conversation they were having.

Set Three:

This was by far the most successful one I had. By now I was a few deep and there were these two girls at the bar waiting for a drink. I started talking to them and I had them laughing like crazy. One of them was very receptive, lots of eye contact and she was very interested in pursuing the conversation. Some kino in there too. However I lost track of her friend after a bit, and right before I was going to see if she wanted to come party with me and my friends later, she made this look and I looked to her friend. Her friend gave her the "alright we're leaving" look, and she ejected. Oh well, at least I had one decent opening!

Set Four:

By this point I was hammered and rather than opening I started dancing. I started to try and dance with this one chick and she completely denied me lol. No biggie.


So this was a good experience for me, not because I did exceptionally well but it was sort of enlightening for me. I give props to you guys that play game in NYC, it's not easy!

 

[flint]

The reason I'm making this entry is because of a situation that happened to me last night, and I just wanted to make sure I played my cards right the entire time or whether I dropped the ball.

Okay so here's the premise to this entry. There is this girl that I've been friends with over the years but she's had a boyfriend the entire time, but she broke up with him a little while ago, so I asked her if she wanted to get some drinks with me last night. I'm not sure if you would consider two single people going out for drinks a date considering we've also been friends for a while, but nonetheless that was the situation.

We went to these two bars in this pretty expensive area near us. Great crowds and everything. When we first got there I led her to the bar where I got us our first drinks. The entire time I was saying hi to everyone and being very social. Then we took a seat in this secluded area of the bar even though everyone was partying hard in the other section.

When we first sat down I was sitting accross the table from her but couldn't hear her so well, so I took my seat and moved it so I was sitting like directly next to her. We had great conversations the entire time and I definitely had her laughing and engaged in all of our conversations the entire time.

Dilema One:

We then went to the bar to get another drink and she ordered something really strong. Here was something that happened that I thought was a little controversial. As I said before, I wasn't really sure it was a date, but I acted like it was to make sure we had a fine time. When we went to the bar I was next to an HB 8.5 while the girl I came with was watching me get our drinks from maybe three feet away. I decided to open the HB 8.5, not just because I'm a social and friendly person, but I figured she would see that I could talk to women.

Flint: So why are there cupcakes here at the bar? Do a lot of people decide they need snacks in between drinks?

HB 8.5 Laughing: Gave me an explanation that I couldn't hear over everyone partying but acted like I heard her anyways.

Flint: They should use them to put into shots or something, like a cupcake shot.

HB Laughing


I don't know where the conversation went after that, but she was laughing and stuff the entire time. I normally would've gone for a number close in this situation, but again the girl I came with was watching this so I wasn't sure what the protocol was. I then started talking to this girl on the other side of me but I was pretty sure she had a boyfriend with her. Nonetheless I still opened her and made her laugh too.

We then went back to our seats and after more talking these two dudes walk up to our table and sit down with us, with the clear intent on picking up the girl I came with. However I basically ruined any chance they had. Everytime they would try and talk to the girl I would ask them something about themselves, and tried to be friendly. Any time they would try and ask the girl I was with a question or something I would somehow steer the conversation away fom her towards something else.

Next we went to this other bar. We took a seat outside by this bench. At first she put her drink down next to me like she was going to sit next to me, but then sat on the other side of the bench so we were facing each other. Lots of eye contact and kino the entire time.

The biggest mistake I think I made through the entire night was at this point. She started at one point talking about how it's tough being a girl because lots of guys and stuff hit on her. Instead of negging her and putting her in her place sort of I just told some other story. I should've made a joke like "give me a break nobody thinks you're attractive" while smiling or something.

Dilema 2:

Anyways the night ended after that (it was already pretty late). She had work really early in the morning (she definitely wasn't lieing). I walked her to her car and asked if she wanted me to give her a ride to my house incase she was too drunk, she said she couldn't but had a really nice time and everything. I told her I would call her later (I should've said something like maybe we'll hang out again or something so I didn't seem like I was so into her or something, but it wasn't the worst thing I could've said either).

In general I thought it went pretty well. She had work really early in the morning, and if she left her car there it would've gotten towed. If she really wanted to she could've come back with me but like I said realisticly I think it wasn't too bad considering the circumstances.

Overall as I pointed out I missed a few opportunities (I definitely should've negged her when she was talking about the guys hitting on her, but at least I didn't fluff her up I just changed the subject).

 

[flint]

I thought I would reflect on how everything is going and what I've learned so far.

I think the most difficult time that I'm having right now is coping with all of the girls I could have had but never did because of my issues. Every semester at school there was always at least one girl that I could tell was attracted to me, but I never pursued anything (even went for a close) because I always had issues feeling inferior to other people for different reasons. And then I would tell myself I would never meet another girl and sure enough I would. I'm in that phase now as well. I feel down that I haven't really made any specific progress in terms of closing, I only know what you're supposed to do and can analyze things but I'm still not yet performing. It comes down to self sabatage and I know it.

The other thing I've noticed is that somehow whenever I'm consciously trying to "game" a girl it never works. Whenever I pull phone numbers or get IOI's its always after I'm not trying whatsoever, but since I'm not trying I never make a move either. I need to find a happy medium where I don't try until I need to close or something. It's very frusterating!