fixing a bad reputation

[foomee]

So I recently broke up with my ex and all around school she's telling people that I cheated on her and dumped her for another girl. (which might be partially true) But the thing is, we've been breaking up on and off, for a week I was stuck sleeping on the floor in the other room of our apartment. For months our relationship was going nowhere but down hill. One weekend I went out with my friends, met a girl, slept with her, then a few days later decided to end things with my ex. Then I got back together with her because I couldn't see her devastated...we were together for almost 3 years; and she was always talking about our future but the past few months I was thinking about how to end things with her.

So yeah I got back together with her a few days, then ended it again. I ended up sleeping at friend's places, then she said we can be friends and I just sleep in the other room of the apartment. So I tried that for a few days, but that was horrible. I told her I couldn't live there...she cried etc so I said whatever. Meanwhile I was going out with this new girl and ended up taking pictures of us at a hotel....the ex took my memory card from my room and saw the pictures, kicked me out of the apartment, burned my clothes, broke my things, and so on.

And now she is telling people that I cheated on her and left her for a girl. Yes the girl is my new girlfriend, but I wouldn't say thats the reason I left her. Everyone says my ex has lost a ton of weight and she seems depressed and stuff and they all think bad of me now. So bottom line is, what can I do to fix this? Personally, I think it'd be stupid to say **** about my ex (and I have some good **** that will make her look really bad).

So what should I do? Tell the story straight? Change it? People only know rumors but I want to fix my reputation as best as I can..

 

[hansol]

You spent 3 years with a chick, all while trying to think of ways to end it? Wow.

Women + Ruin Reputation doesn't coincide in my opinion. Everyone knows how wishy-washy women are, and how their whims change 10 times a day. Plus this girl sounds like a drama queen, so I don't think many people will be too inclined or care too much to worry about what she says. On top of that, you have a new chick. So why worry?

My guess would be just to carry on. Men slamming reputation = problem. Women = same old unimportant nonsense. I think we just had a thread on bitter ex-wives, and the consensus seems to be they never lose the bitterness.

 

[xdreamz]

you just fix it up by kicking it with other people that are good for you. that's it.

 

[Jeffst1980]

Let it go.

Don't try to even the score with her.

She's bitter because you led her on for 3 years and cheated on her--OF COURSE she's going to badmouth you!!

Go on and let her--if you want to improve your reputation, all you need to do is acknowledge that you understand she's angry right now, without being critical of her.

This is how EVERY relationship ends--even if you didn't cheat on her, she'd STILL be angry at you and speak ill of you to her friends. It's a small price to pay, though, if you know that you don't want to marry her. Man up and let em talk trash. Your reputation will heal itself.

 

[kingsam]

So I recently broke up with my ex and all around school she's telling people that I cheated on her and dumped her for another girl. (which might be partially true) But the thing is, we've been breaking up on and off, for a week I was stuck sleeping on the floor in the other room of our apartment. For months our relationship was going nowhere but down hill. One weekend I went out with my friends, met a girl, slept with her, then a few days later decided to end things with my ex. Then I got back together with her because I couldn't see her devastated...we were together for almost 3 years and she was always talking about our future but the whole time I was thinking about how to end things with her.

So yeah I got back together with her a few days, then ended it again. I ended up sleeping at friend's places, then she said we can be friends and I just sleep in the other room of the apartment. So I tried that for a few days, but that was horrible. I told her I couldn't live there...she cried etc so I said whatever. Meanwhile I was going out with this new girl and ended up taking pictures of us at a hotel....the ex took my memory card from my room and saw the pictures, kicked me out of the apartment, burned my clothes, broke my things, and so on.

And now she is telling people that I cheated on her and left her for a girl. Yes the girl is my new girlfriend, but I wouldn't say thats the reason I left her. Everyone says my ex has lost a ton of weight and she seems depressed and stuff and they all think bad of me now. So bottom line is, what can I do to fix this? Personally, I think it'd be stupid to say **** about my ex (and I have some good **** that will make her look really bad).

So what should I do? Tell the story straight? Change it? People only know rumors but I want to fix my reputation as best as I can..

MORAL OF THE STORY = dont have relationships with weak women!

you were also too young to be living with a girl
at college and the few years after (at least), you need to live with other guys not with a gf !
you wont them ever be kicked out by a gf!

 

[J.F.]

Then I got back together with her because I couldn't see her devastated...we were together for almost 3 years and she was always talking about our future but the whole time I was thinking about how to end things with her.

WOW. You were dating someone you didn't like for three years because you were afraid of 'devastating' her?? I don't even know what to say, man....this is really fvcking said.

 

[foomee]

WOW. You were dating someone you didn't like for three years because you were afraid of 'devastating' her?? I don't even know what to say, man....this is really fvcking said.

Sorry, I wasn't quite clear but the last 6 months of the relationship it was going down hill.

Ok so basically what you guys are saying is that my reputation should heal itself. Many of my friends who were also friends with her (both guys and girls) said they would side with me and believe me no matter what. Overall I'm confident things will get better, recently I've been hanging out with this new girl a little too much so I think if I'm back with others around our school things will get better.

Thanks.