In 2022, I made an investment to take game seriously by going out every weekend and talking to women (occasionally weekdays too). I have managed to get numbers, dates, and lays but also come away with some lessons. Before this, I relied on dating apps and a lot of drinking + drunk approaches at night to get laid. Here are five lessons I have learned so far.
First, I want to thank
@SW15,
@Jake_Gyllenhaal69,
@BillyPilgrim, and many of you on here (do not mean to forget too many names here) for helping me in my journey! Here are the lessons:
1. This crap is tough.
I sat down and watched some College Football today after spending hours yesterday night and even today just walking around and running game. Let me make one thing clear here, this thing is freaking hard. I used to hate the guys that LTR quick in their 20s and spend their weekends golfing and chugging beer over some sports. Occasionally, I think about it too. I think about just spending a weekend where all I do is watch sports, drink some beer, and do anything but talk to women. The rejections, awkwardness, and all of that adds up and it really tests you as a guy. However, it comes and goes in waves.
All it takes is one good weekend where you rack up numbers like crazy and have a number of dates to understand why you do this.
2. Most wingmen, and men in general, are completely worthless and useless when it comes to game.
Let me make one point clear here, most men, even those into pickup and game, rarely approach!
Good wingmen exist but they are very rare as
@SW15 will tell you. Most men do not approach women and of the ones that do, most of them are seriously awful. All too often, I have seen dudes approach fat chicks in place of hot ones because they didn't want to get their egos crushed. I used to be in a Pickup Group when I first got to my city and I was amazed at just how awful most guys who actually read the pickup crap are.
I even had nights where the guys in the group were too busy gossiping about the group rather than doing game. It got so bad to where I decided to do solo nightgame. Then come to find that the same guys who would not do an approach that whole night would try to either barge into my sets that were going well or ask me for favors despite not doing a thing for me.
Let me put it this way, if you meet a wing that does the following, consider yourself lucky:
- Goes out to game with you
- Actually approaches
- Talks to girls that actually look good
3. Most men into pickup are seriously unaware of how toxic, cringe, and useless they are.
Sticking to this one point about men, it has truly amazed me as to how much dudes lack self-awareness about this. I had one wing from the group a few months ago who promised to meet up with me but was late. Then, come to find, he didn't even do much of an approach when we met up. We agree to meet up again a week later at a bar and he was there with two of his guy friends that knew him from high school. The whole time, even though he asked me to meet up, he acted real dismissive towards me while his high school friends were being smug.
I ignore him and do some approaches that mostly go bad. However, I hook one set and am close to taking them elsewhere. Soon, wing and his friends jump in on the set and start talking to them which they found weird. Issue is, they knew me and somehow that led to the whole set being ruined. Things get really weird here because a few weeks later, wing sees me out at an exclusive place and is DMing me left and right to get him in.
For this reason, I am picky about who I wing with.
Way too many men act clingy and desperate around
OTHER MEN which makes it pretty clear around why they struggle with women and dating. If I am noticing these traits in these dudes, I cannot imagine how women will feel about them.
4. Your life situation will always pore over into game, fix your life first before going full on in game.
Toxic work?
Family issues?
Confidence issues?
Health issues?
All of that will come out into game if you are doing it right. Too many guys get into game without having their lives handled first, something I agree on with
@Fruitbat whenever we have chatted. I faced a crushing and draining work situation like
@LARaiders85 had and it impacted my energy for game. I had to practically quit my job because of how beaten I was emotionally, mentally, and even spiritually. Thankfully, things are now looking great for me and I should recover really well but when I had the toxic work I had, I was not myself and easily irritated when it came to game.
Whatever crap you are going through in life, game will unveil it. Sh-tests by women will uncover and peel that onion. Get your life handled first or put yourself in a place where it does not emotionally crush you if you want to do well in game.
5. In the end, nothing beats that feeling of success in game that very few men will experience.
The feeling of walking down the street and chatting up a hot girl as jealous dudes who don't have the balls to do that look around. They want you to get rejected and fail but you get that number. Number turns into a date. Dates sometimes turn into lays.
I have played on a football team before in high school that won a lot of games and I have achieved a lot of cool stuff in life. However, none of that rivals the feeling of pulling through. Nothing rivals that feeling of going through rejection after rejection but then one hot girl finally gives you the time of the day and you two are going on a date a day or two later.
Very few men will experience this.
Most men will play golf on weekends as they chug beer over a football game. Most men will settle with a girl they met at work or in a social circle. Most men will get into an LTR and marry fast. Very few men will go through the grind of the game.
In a way, the game tests you and it breaks most men. It breaks you in a unique way that tests even the toughest guys out there. When you do pull through and have some successes, nothing feels better.
I got ways to go, I have been in a slump as of late, and I have been tested like nothing else. However, your guy is not giving up!