First Time Poster, and I Have a Million Questions

[leeraconteur]

Hello.

There is a guy over at another forum, that shall remain unnamed, that is extremely gung ho about all of this PUA stuff. He and I did not see eye to eye and he left, referring to me and the other members as old, boring and fickle.

I point out what I see, and he just did not care for my observations.

I am 50, single, used to live in DC for 25 years. I was in the club scene that entire time as an owner, promoter, Disc Jockey and such. In HS I did not get the ladies at all, had two girlfriends, had several hookups in college, moved to DC after I graduated, worked in clubs as a Disc Jockey and had moderate success with the ladies for 25 years. I have been dating since 1978. I was married once, engaged twice, have lived with 4 women, have been in love 5 times, have had 8+ girlfriends, 110 girls, more or less. I cannot really remember the exact number. This tapered off when I began to look over 40, went grey, lost the hair, faded from the club scene.

So being accepting of the future I quit DJ'ing and went into Accounting, Finance and such. That was 1999, just when this whole Game thing began to rise on the internet.

Since then I run into you guys when I am in the USA (I live in Asia), and sometimes in bigger Chinese cities, and of course online and...I am trying to be polite here.

Let me ask you all:

0) Who is the oldest member you have here? Anyone in their 50's or 60's?
1) Do you think that PUA/Sets/KINO/Game is some sort of invisible magic hand that no one sees?
2) Do you think that modifying sales techniques to getting laid is also invisible to everyone else?

Best,
Lee

 

[Mantis Toboggan]

0) Who is the oldest member you have here? Anyone in their 50's or 60's?

There are a few. Look around the Mature Man forum.

1) Do you think that PUA/Sets/KINO/Game is some sort of invisible magic hand that no one sees?

Yes. Invisible magic hands everywhere.

Ok seriously. This is what we call a "loaded question". You're asking the question not to get information, but for the purpose of criticizing. "An invisible magic hand", etc etc.

So here's the first thing - this site isn't PUA material. We're not talking about "peacocking" or asking a girl stupid questions or corny pickup lines.

Look around and you'll see that this site is 90% about self improvement. Sure, some people preach PUA stuff. Bust most people don't.

So it's not magic. If I can summarize what I read on this site, it's "If you want to get quality women, first become a quality man."

2) Do you think that modifying sales techniques to getting laid is also invisible to everyone else?

As I said, this isn't about magic tricks and invisibility.

You're not trying to trick a woman into buying an inferior product. You're trying to BECOME a better product....one that sells itself.

 

[leeraconteur]

Yes. Invisible magic hands everywhere.

Ok seriously. This is what we call a "loaded question". You're asking the question not to get information, but for the purpose of criticizing. "An invisible magic hand", etc etc.

So here's the first thing - this site isn't PUA material.

Actually from what I have read, it is indeed PUA material. Several posters have very harsh attitudes towards women. Which is fine - it gets them results.

What I see is that by using certain methods and attitudes, the dating pool of females drops in quality every year as they adjust to the methods 'that work'.

What is going to happen when you guys want to settle down when you are 30, 40, 50 or 60? The women will be so messed up, they won't even be worth a casual lay.

I say this having observed, and dated, 1978 to 2011 social attitudes in the USA. Can anyone doubt that women and men don't get along as well now as they did then?

 

[KarmaSutra]

The only trick is adaptability and the perseverance to not give a fvck about her opinion of who you should be.

Chronological age is absolutely meaningless in the courtship ritual.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Poppy, you have to understand these PUA tricks and traps are exactly that: tricks and shortcuts.

They'll get you to the door, but worthless once you step inside.

 

[Nutz]

Poppy, you have to understand these PUA tricks and traps are exactly that: tricks and shortcuts.

They'll get you to the door, but worthless once you step inside.

I see this as two sides of the same coin. On one hand you've got the things that make you a better communicator and that puts your best foot forward that makes that good first impression and gives you your shot to convey your personality.

On the other hand is the stuff that is meant to improve who you are as a person, to actually BE your best self.

One is about presentation, think Toastmasters, and the other is true self-improvement. All the guys faking it can indeed get results, but those won't be long term in many cases if they never take that stuff to heart. Much of it can still effect long-term change though because of rote memorization and creating habits from repeating the same material a bunch of times, and that's fine and good, but the true self-improvement and maximizing how others perceive you is really what game is all about IMO, or at least should be.

When I give my classes in the DC area that's how I go about it. I lean heavily on Toastmasters for the presentation aspects and then look at their personality as a whole and try to make tweaks here or there where I can as appropriate.

 

[zekko]

=leeraconteurWho is the oldest member you have here? Anyone in their 50's or 60's?

I'm 50, I know there's at least one guy in his 60s here, probably a couple.
I'm not "in the game" though, I've been living with my girlfriend for eight years.
Check out the Mature Men forum, you'll probably be able to relate to the topics and the type of advice you see over there better.
You have to put your age in your profile though or your posts will get deleted.

1) Do you think that PUA/Sets/KINO/Game is some sort of invisible magic hand that no one sees?

When I see guys running game on girls, it looks painfully obvious to me. I think a lot of girls see it too (especially hot girls, who get approached a lot), but they'll often play along if they like you. A lot of the stuff like kino is pretty effective anyway, especially if you can make it natural to you.

I don't know much about sales, so I can't answer the third question.

This tapered off when I began to look over 40, went grey, lost the hair, faded from the club scene.

I wouldn't let a little aging limit your thinking. Girls aren't all wrapped up in youthful appearance like guys are, and I find they appreciate a little maturity. You just have to stay in shape. I don't blame you for leaving the club scene though.

 

[Amazing]

Hello.

There is a guy over at another forum, that shall remain unnamed, that is extremely gung ho about all of this PUA stuff. He and I did not see eye to eye and he left, referring to me and the other members as old, boring and fickle.

I point out what I see, and he just did not care for my observations.

I am 50, single, used to live in DC for 25 years. I was in the club scene that entire time as an owner, promoter, Disc Jockey and such. In HS I did not get the ladies at all, had two girlfriends, had several hookups in college, moved to DC after I graduated, worked in clubs as a Disc Jockey and had moderate success with the ladies for 25 years. I have been dating since 1978. I was married once, engaged twice, have lived with 4 women, have been in love 5 times, have had 8+ girlfriends, 110 girls, more or less. I cannot really remember the exact number. This tapered off when I began to look over 40, went grey, lost the hair, faded from the club scene.

So being accepting of the future I quit DJ'ing and went into Accounting, Finance and such. That was 1999, just when this whole Game thing began to rise on the internet.

Since then I run into you guys when I am in the USA (I live in Asia), and sometimes in bigger Chinese cities, and of course online and...I am trying to be polite here.

Let me ask you all:

0) Who is the oldest member you have here? Anyone in their 50's or 60's?
1) Do you think that PUA/Sets/KINO/Game is some sort of invisible magic hand that no one sees?
2) Do you think that modifying sales techniques to getting laid is also invisible to everyone else?

Best,
Lee

Why don't you ask what you really want to ask and be honest. That's the first step.

 

[Iceberg]

Why don't you ask what you really want to ask and be honest. That's the first step.

Seriously. If he has an issue with the site, just come out and say it.

With his vast library of experience and age, you'd think he'd be more comfortable with getting to the point.

 

[leeraconteur]

The only trick is adaptability and the perseverance to not give a fvck about her opinion of who you should be.

Why do you want to be in the presence of someone who you do not give a fvck about her opinion of who you are?

Doesn't this read like someone who is at least mildly hostile to the woman he wants to date/fvck?

This is the sort of attitude I refer to. Not caring what your date thought of you in 1978 really did not work out except for the aholes, and trying to be an aholes because he got laid in HS and you did not, will just create aholes women.

 

[leeraconteur]

Seriously. If he has an issue with the site, just come out and say it.

With his vast library of experience and age, you'd think he'd be more comfortable with getting to the point.

I am being polite and want to check the attitudes here before I make an inaccurate observation.

 

[leeraconteur]

When I see guys running game on girls, it looks painfully obvious to me. I think a lot of girls see it too (especially hot girls, who get approached a lot), but they'll often play along if they like you. A lot of the stuff like kino is pretty effective anyway, especially if you can make it natural to you.

Ok, so it's not just me.

 

[Amazing]

I am being polite and want to check the attitudes here before I make an inaccurate observation.

You are 50 years old and don't realize there are ALL sorts of people out there? I guarantee there are people here who will agree with you and disagree with you - so just stop wasting our time and post what you need help with.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Why do you want to be in the presence of someone who you do not give a fvck about her opinion of who you are?

Doesn't this read like someone who is at least mildly hostile to the woman he wants to date/fvck?

This is the sort of attitude I refer to. Not caring what your date thought of you in 1978 really did not work out except for the aholes, and trying to be an aholes because he got laid in HS and you did not, will just create aholes women.

You want to be read as "schooled" but you're far from it. You didn't bother to read my entire post. Like a spoiled Tween, you picked out one line from it and tried to garner a side from it.

Read it again with glasses.