First date seemed to go well, but shes not answering my calls

bunjy

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Ok so I took this girl out a few nights ago, first date. It went pretty well (not great), she was shy but after a few drinks plenty of KINO (intiated by both me and her) was going on and I was using a fair bit of C+F which she was responding well to. Anyway I got a decent kiss at the end of the night then a txt later on saying thanks and how she had a great time (we hadnt agreed a 2nd date though). I responded to her txt saying it was my pleasure. Next day i txted her (bad move, I know) saying I had a good time lastnite and she responded with a pretty crap txt (dull with no kiss). So I txt back asking her a question and got no reply, later on that evening I called her (i know i know, another bad move) and she ignored my call, i didnt leave a mesage. That was yesterday and she hasnt returned the call or txted. Im not sure about this one, it seems somewhere between her txting me after our date and the next morning shes lost interest.

Is she just playing games or testing me or is she simply not interested?? Is playing 'hard to get'?? She did give me a decent kiss at the end of the date and a txt afterwards but she was drunk and maybe ive blown it by contacting her so soon. Also ive heard her ex screwed her over and im fairly sure shes got trust issues is it possible she does like me but is beng cautious??

What do you guys think, should I next this girl or give her another call in a few days (which isnt really my style to keep persisting)???
 

Alle_Gory

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I would consider dropping it. Too many contacts in too short a time.

Maybe I'd send her a text in 2-3 days. "Hey whatsup? Lets meet up again." Don't say anything mentioning your attempts to contact her. It never happened.

Attract, don't pursue.
 

T|CK

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DonS said:
Stop lieing to yourself. Jesus Christ you are so transparent. You are insecure at an alarming level. You know exactly why this chick dumped your ass: You are an AFC.

She tested you by not returning your txt within 4 seconds to which you simply freaked out from anxiety that she might not like you that you then tried contacting her, numerous times in a row. This display of behavior is exactly that of insecurity. And insecurity is the number one turn off for women. You display to this women a huge dose of insecurity and now pretend to "wonder" why she left.

I know you posted here in hopes of a quick ego boost from some posters calling her a "psycho", or "she's an Attention *****". Get over yourself already; call a spade, a spade. Your self-confidence sucks. Do push-ups; go jogging; eat healthy; get over your depression. You've got a lot to learn, but it won't take that long if you work at it.
Hey, how do you keep yourself from reacting in the manner that he did? What is it that triggers this type of behavior, and what's the best way to avoid it?

I can think of so many times that I've texted or called a girl and got no reply. I waited until the next day and texted or called her a second time. If I still didn't get a reply, I would text her goodbye, then I usually deleted her number to spare myself from the feelings I would have had if I kept her number. Knowing I don't have her number means I want make anymore attempts.
 

insidious

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Hindsight is 20/20, but...
Her text was a nice gesture.
There was NO reason for you to respond immediately. I know you were excited and all, but chill dude.
Next morning/afternoon, text back, 'thank you, I had a great time too.' and leave it at that.

Call her in a day or two. You were all over her like a fly on **** and chicks don't want to be ****.
 

r0cky

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Its interesting how you are able to point out all the wrong moves you made but in the end you still don't know whats wrong.
Your intuition is always right, if it seems like a bad move, then you shouldn't do it.
 

KingBeef

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r0cky said:
Its interesting how you are able to point out all the wrong moves you made but in the end you still don't know whats wrong.
Your intuition is always right, if it seems like a bad move, then you shouldn't do it.

ditto ;)
 

#41

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DonS said:
Do push-ups; go jogging; eat healthy; get over your depression. You've got a lot to learn, but it won't take that long if you work at it.
Exactly how is doing push-ups, going jogging, or eating healthy going to help this guy solve his problems?

What awful advice -- especially when his situation has little to do with anything else other than clearly being over-anxious about his situation with this one girl.

I'm guessing he probably doesn't have a lot going on with other women, so he's focusing all his attention on this one girl. The best advice to give is to get out there and be working many different angles with many different people, that way you're busy texting 4 and 5 girls instead of sending 4 and 5 texts to one girl.
 

bunjy

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Thanks guys, good advice there. Yeah im pretty sure it was too much contact too soon. I agree with what some of you are sayng about knowing when a bad move is a bad move, I dunno guess I just got carried away
 

aix237

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dude you already know where you messed up. Should have never tried to contact her twice. That is so needy its not even funny and im sure you know that. Stop doing that sh1t. Try once and thats it. LIke you already know you shouldve never initated the first contact after the date. Control yourself and stop giving a sh1t about her. You need to have the mind set that you are better than her and then you wont be doing the stupid sh1t you did.
 

DJx420

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I'd definately agree, you contacted her WAYYYYY too much in too short of a period.

I wouldn't next this girl as you did say you had a good date and she did go out of her wa to text you back that night.

First off, I wouldn't have responded as quickly as you did to the first text. I would probably have waited until the next day or so (keeps her wondering about why you didn't answer her).

Next, I DEFINATELY wouldn't have texted her the next day. You wiat at least 2 days and CALL her to setup another meeting. You tell her WHEN and WHERE and if she doesn't like it then you tell her your busy and for her to call you when she can go out and just MAYBE you'll be free to take her out again.

If she doesn't call you back NEXT. Easy as that.
 

brian123

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bun > I did exactly what you did. I drove the girl away. So take it from personal experience, start spinning other plates/focusing on other things.

Take a while to respond/if you respond at all. Act like she is just another thing in your life. That will get her attention.
 
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