Finishing off Junior Year

[sportskid13]

Well I've been lurking on these forums almost this entire year and during that time I've learned so much about how to deal with girls and life. Recently I've especially liked reading sageproduct's field reports because it reminds me of my situation, although I dont think I'm as far along as he is. Anyway, my situation is that my friends and I really don't hang out with girls at all (I am probably the one that does the most, and I just started this year). Most of the time we just play sports of video games by ourselves, and if someone ever likes a girl they usually make comments like discouraging the person from persuing the girl they like. That has also kind of stopped me from going after too many girls during high school. However we're definitely not losers just dont hang out with girls and I wouldn't want to ever just "drop" them.

There are a couple girls right now that I want to focus on:

Girl A is someone I've been friends with pretty much the whole year and have a couple classes with. I have her number and we text every once in a while but nothing ever too flirty. I have a hunch shes somewhat interested in me just because alot of the time when we talk I make her laugh alot and she'll playfully hit me or touch my hand. She's cute but I'm really not that interested in her (probably partly cuz my friends have told me not to go after her before) but lately I've started to reconsider how I might feel.

Girl B is the girl that I really like alot more., and need more advice with. Over the whole year we've kinda said hi to each other/ smiled a couple times a week, but never talked as much till recently. We don't have any classes together so the chances to talk are definitely less. Over the past few weeks I've talked to her a lot more just because by chance we've bumped into each other. (maybe talk 2-3 times a week) We always laugh a lot and have good conversations I guess, but its hard to tell how she feels. I never really make it sexual (my biggest problem I think) Last week I got her number but haven't used it much. (texted that day saying "if you get this i guess you remembered your own number haha", since she said she wasn't sure she remembered her number, and she responded "haha hi 'sportskid' ", then about 10 minutes later i made a joke about something that happened that day and she never responded so I left it alone. ) So I'm definitely not convinced she likes me... anyway i was pretty proud of myself for getting her number after a few weeks of telling myself i should, it was actually easy to do haha.

I know that I should make plans to do something, but I want to feel comfortable shes interested first, also I know that I need to work on being more sexual so i have to work on that..

I'll try to keep you updated on what happens!

 

[Rambofan]

Don't let your "friends" control who you can like or not. They are just jealous/homophobic.

 

[Sir Psycho Sexy]

^^agree with Rambofan, they dont want to see you succeed.

Do you have a car? can you drive?

Your heading into your senior year so you need to definitely get all the experience you can. You need to pursue both girls, I would focus on girl A first because you dont care about her as much and it wont matter if you screw up.

If your unsure if they like you then make plans that would not come off as dates, ex. dont ask them to the movies, out to dinner, or watch a movie at your house.

Rather ask them to a bike ride, hang at the pool, or chill at your house as long as you wouldnt end up watching a movie.

You will know if they like you or not after spending some time with them outside of school.

 

[sportskid13]

Yeah I have my own car and can drive so I really have no excuse haha. Also I didn't mention that Girl A and B are friends with each other which could complecate things. Also they are 'nice' girls, haven't done much with guys i think, dont drink or party, but thats like me too

Wed May 12

Today I took my AP exam and talked a little to both girls. I'll focus more on B though since thats who I'm more interested in. She happened to sit right in front of me (its assigned seats) and then she started a short conversation, but it didn't last long since the test started. Then after part 1 was over just talked to her for a minute before going over to my friends and she to hers. (which includes girl A) before part 2 we just exchanged a look like we didn't want to take the second part of the test. After it was over we both left without saying anythin, I probably should have said something but i figured it was enough for the day.

So nothing really exciting to note, just getting comfort I guess...I was thinking about texting both of the later today something like "so what did you think of the test?" and seeing what responses I get just to see where i stand with them

Thanks for the advice I know I'm definitely trying not to worry about what my friends think about me

 

[sportskid13]

Sunday, May 16

Well I haven't posted recently just cause I've been really busy and haven't had much time too. But anyway, I'll give an update on what has happened.

Girl A is pretty much the same...I feel like she might be interested and I could go out with her but I really don't want to and I just can't bring myself to use her for 'practice' when I really like Girl B. Maybe if things don't work out with B I could rethink thinks but right now I don't think I could do it.

Anyway I texted Girl B for a little while today. She used smiles in the conversation here and there and a few times she kept it going when I purposely put something that didn't need an answer, but the only real thing to be noted is that I tried to be a little sexual by jokingly talking about megan fox and how she is hot. The whole conversation lasted about 2 hours. The only thing is at the end she was the one to stop texting, (like I said something that didn't really need a reply, and she didn't) I would have perferred that I end the conversation, but I guess it is ok? Is it bad that she didn't even say goodbye? I hate to dwell on text messages but that is all I really have to go on right now.

Also I made an interesting revelation the other day. Theres a third girl, girl C, that I'm really not interested in at all, mainly because of looks, her personality is cool. So we're pretty good friends, but I think its pretty obvious that she likes me, while I try to show no attraction at all. Its pretty much the opposite of most guys on here going after a girl that they're in the friend zone with. And you know what - I actually dont mind getting the text messages and IM's cause it really DOES fuel your ego. Crazy huh? I'm really not leading her on though cause I know I wouldn't want to be if for example Girl B was doing it to me haha

 

[sportskid13]

Monday, May 17

Nothing really to note today, talked to both girls A and B for literally like 2 minutes (at the same time in a group) Was really tired today so I really probably passed up being more outgoing or even sexual, I have to work on that. Tonight I'm gonna work out and go to bed early so I'll feel great for tomorrow.

Also, I'd love some advice on my previous post if there is anything anybody is thinking I'll try to keep this updated

 

[Pdizzzzzzle]

Your situation of being a what my teacher calls "scholar/athlete" almost parallels mine exactly. However, with sports and school its hard to get good with girls.

Here's my advice you're free to take it, or do whatever you want. So it seems like you like B, kinda like A, and don't like C. My advice is just go for B. Some guys on these forums will tell you to game on A or C just for practice. I would "pracvtice" on C, but not A. If A and B are friends and you f*ck around with A, your chances of being with B plummet. This is what I have found with most "nice girls" in high school. What I'm trying to say is you're THE MAN. You probably got good grades and are good at sports (maybe even halo since you said you play video games ). Why would girl B not want to date you? Trust me, go for the girl you want.

Also, if A and B are friends, why not get a group thing together between some of their friends and some of your friends? It eliminates some of the weird intro moments, and since your friends seem a little more AFCish than you, you could easily establish alpha dominance. Good luck, and keep giving us updates.

 

[sportskid13]

Thanks for the response You're pretty much spot on with everything you said with respect to playing sports and getting good grades (except i play COD, not halo aha) I definitely agree that I can't go after both at the same time, and I've decided its gonna be B, while still flirting with A.

In theory, getting together some of their friends and my friends is a great idea, but I really don't think it would work, just cause my friends aren't friends with them at ALL (or any girls for that matter) and I know for a fact they wouldn't even WANT to hang out with them, not to mention they're fvckin awkward around people they're not comfortable with. Also, I'm just barely into the girl's group of friends (I'm friends with some of the people in there, just not everyone)

I keep telling myself I'll ask girl B out to the movies or something in the summer, just because I'll have more time then, but I really should do it sooner...

 

[Pdizzzzzzle]

If you can, bringing two social circles together will make you look good. Also your "n00b" friend will make you look pretty "1337" in front of the girl if you catch my drift.

First date, I wouldn't do anything to traditional (a lotta girls see the movies as just awkward, you sit there and just stare at a screen. This means you don't really get much convo in.) My personal favorite is mini golf. If there's a place near you I'd try it. You can be a goofy, funny guy and even get in some kino by "teaching he proper putting technique."

 

[YogurtSlinger]

One thing you need to do is actually call her. Stop being a b1tch and texting all the time. Texting is for losers.

 

[sportskid13]

Thanks for the advice guys

First I'll try and respond to what you've been saying: First of all, I'll admit it, I really AM a b1tch when it comes to girls, and unfortunately I've probably messed up a lot of the chances I've had in the past. I'm trying to improve myself now but its not easy and there are still things that i have to work with from a while ago. I first met girl B two years ago, and during that time she really acted like she was interested in me but I did not pick up at it at all at the time. We really were never 'friends' (I didn't even have her number until a couple weeks ago) and barely talked. But at the same time our relationship now is not one where I could just "call her". It really just wouldn't work - I think. Hopefully this makes sense haha, if it doesn't I can try again

Also, a mini golf date would definitely be good and probably better than the movies - I'd like to work on getting to that point first though.

Tuesday, May 18

I guess today was alright - really just went through the motions, something I shouldn't be doing. I spent some time talking with girl A, mostly just joking and making here laugh. She usually playfully touches me when we talk and today was no exception, even though I really never reciprocate the kino.

A question - should I be going over to girl B whenever I have a chance to talk? A lot of the time I might see her out of the corner of my eye but just keep talking and laughing with friends. I guess I feel like this shows I am a 'cool' guy whos 'busy' and will make time for her when I feel like it? She probably doesn't even notice me walking by when that happnes Also when we do pass usually we'll just smile at each other - maybe sometimes I should turn around and start talking to her?

Tomorrow is going to be a better day.

 

[Pdizzzzzzle]

To answer your question: You kinda have to be able to feel the situation. If its like you talking with your friends, and playing baseball, you don't want to just drop them for her. That makes you look clingy and desperate. But if your just walking down the hall and you both smile at each other, by all means I'd start a convo. Good luck tomorrow and keep us updated.

 

[sportskid13]

Wednesday, May 19

There isn't much to say of today. Went to school, talked to the same people, did most of the same things...

I guess I'll comment on the girls I've previously mentioned. I chatted with Girl A on the way out of class today, and was walking with her through the hall. But instead of continuing to talk with her and then going over to her group of friends, (which would have included Girl B), I ejected too soon and just went over to talk to my friends.

I talk to Girl A pretty regularly since I have a few classes with her, but I don't have any classes with Girl B so the opportunities are fewer. I passed her today in the hall, but only saw her waving to me through the corner of my eye as she went past, so it was too late for me to say hello. I don't think this means anything at all, but maybe it will be of interest to someone reading haha. Plus it was the only time I even saw girl B today at all.

I guess I'm just trying to feel out my situation with both girls so see where I stand. This weekend I'm hanging out with girl A and other girls/guys I dont usually hang around outside of school - I'm pretty excited about doing something without my usual friends.

 

[Pdizzzzzzle]

Wednesday, May 19

There isn't much to say of today. Went to school, talked to the same people, did most of the same things...life's to short to just go through the motions. Do something different tomorrow. School's ending soon and if you don't establish a good relationship with this girl now, its over for a while.

I guess I'll comment on the girls I've previously mentioned. I chatted with Girl A on the way out of class today, and was walking with her through the hall. But instead of continuing to talk with her and then going over to her group of friends, (which would have included Girl B), I ejected too soon and just went over to talk to my friends. Did you read the situation or pvssy out? If you appropriately left, its fine. If you were too nervous to talk to girl B... your not getting any younger

I talk to Girl A pretty regularly since I have a few classes with her, but I don't have any classes with Girl B so the opportunities are fewer. I passed her today in the hall, but only saw her waving to me through the corner of my eye as she went pastgood sign, so it was too late for me to say hello. I don't think this means anything at all, but maybe it will be of interest to someone reading haha. Plus it was the only time I even saw girl B today at all.

I guess I'm just trying to feel out my situation with both girls so see where I stand. This weekend I'm hanging out with girl A and other girls/guys I dont usually hang around outside of schoolvery nice, expand your circle of comfort and meet new people - I'm pretty excited about doing something without my usual friends.

Make sure you do not end up putting B on a pedestal. You said you are meeting new girls/ guys this weekend. Try your game on some of the new girls. It's a no pressure situation, if you fail you may never have to see that person again.

 

[sportskid13]

To answer your question: I wasn't even thinking about girl B at the time I was walking with A, I just basically ejected out of habit - a bad habit to have.

Also, in response to B on a pedestal, I can confidently say that she is about ten times lower on that pedestal than she was a few months ago. Now that I'm more comfortable with her I'm not scared to talk to her at all - in fact its really the opposite. Maybe I'm crazy, but I DONT want to talk to her everyday cause I really dont want to get in the friendzone with her. Also, I dont want it to seem like I'm 'scoping' her out everyday to talk. I'm really looking for here to kind of 'initiate' with me, but she is kinda a shy girl so who knows if that will happen. Basically if she would text me out of nowhere I would know she liked me. Its not that I'm 'waiting' for that to happen before I ask her out or anything, its just that would confirm how she feels. Am I right in how I feel about this?

Finally - yes I really need to make each day count - although I may have more school left than you - I get out in late June...

 

[sageproduct]

Hey man, keep updating this--it really helps a lot.

That's all I can really say right now because I don't consider myself qualified for giving advice yet.

 

[sportskid13]

Monday May 24

I cannot honestly come on here and say that I've made great strides towards my goals in regards to girls. It just seems like things are moving really slowly - maybe partly because I haven't been able to post here so I didn't feel accountable? I don't know the reason, but I'm stuck and don't know how to get out of it. I can admit it, I definitley have oneitis for B, but I'm not neccesarily upset about that - it's just that I don't think I can fully go after another girl until I get closure with her - but who knows when that will be... maybe I will lay low until summer ( another month), then go after her strong and ask her out...i'm just confused now.

While things with B are pretty stagnant, I do feel like my confidence is rising- many times today I was louder and more out of my normal comfort zone than usual. Also, I am starting to become good friends with another girl (I'm not interested at all and she has a boyfriend - I feel like she is one ofthe girls I can act totally like myself around). Anyway I feel like she could be someone that could hook me up at some time so maybe it could be helpful. ( this girl is also like best friends with A, and decent friends with B).

I feel like posting here really helps to push me to improve so even if nothing is really happening m gonna try and still post each day so please bear with me

 

[Pdizzzzzzle]

Monday May 24

I cannot honestly come on here and say that I've made great strides towards my goals in regards to girls. It just seems like things are moving really slowly - maybe partly because I haven't been able to post here so I didn't feel accountable? I don't know the reason, but I'm stuck and don't know how to get out of it. I can admit it, I definitley have oneitis for B, but I'm not neccesarily upset about that - it's just that I don't think I can fully go after another girl until I get closure with her - but who knows when that will be... maybe I will lay low until summer ( another month), then go after her strong and ask her out...i'm just confused now. If I were you I would lay it on girl B before summer. You don't want to head into summer with "baggage" if you know what I mean. You are the prize not her, why should you have to waste time on her? Read some of the articles on getting out of the friendzone and you'll find some good tips.

While things with B are pretty stagnant, I do feel like my confidence is rising- many times today I was louder and more out of my normal comfort zone than usual. good. I find this too. Sosuave really breaks you out of your inner shell, not only with girls but everyone in general.Also, I am starting to become good friends with another girl (I'm not interested at all and she has a boyfriend - I feel like she is one ofthe girls I can act totally like myself around). Anyway I feel like she could be someone that could hook me up at some time so maybe it could be helpful. ( this girl is also like best friends with A, and decent friends with B). Like I said before do not make the mistake of trying to solely set up with B. It seems kinda like your thinking of this new girl as a way to get to B, but I might be wrong. The world is a big place, and there are plenty of better looking, cooler chicks out there then girl B. Try and meet some new girls before school ends, that way you can maybe hang with them in the summer. Even if your not totally interested in them, you never know (they may have hot friends

I feel like posting here really helps to push me to improve so even if nothing is really happening m gonna try and still post each day so please bear with me

good idea posting everyday. It really helps people get stuff done. Keep going man, you got balls for posting everyday.

 

[sportskid13]

Actually, I'm not really sure what "baggage" means, lol. Maybe someone could clarify? Also, I really don't feel like I'm in the friendzone with Girl B since its not like we really talk all that much we're more like 'adequateness' - at least thats how i read our relationship now. But you are right - before summer something needs to happen.

Also, I know that I shouldn't get solely set on B and that is probably something that is holding me back. However, a few months ago I was really in deep oneitis with her and was afraid to even TALK to her....I've really come a long way and now my oneitis is at a MUCH lower level. What i was trying to say is that before I seriously go after girl A, or any other girl for that matter, I want to go after B.

Finally, I am really trying to become better friends with girls in general so that I can make plans to hang out over the summer - and I think its working. Now im confident that I have the rapport to hang out with different groups of people - including girls A and B.


Tuesday May 25

Today I talked more to girl A into class and in the hallways. To be honest I am trying to become more 'friends' with her - in one way so that I can get closer to girl B, but also so that we can hang out over the summer and I can start to hang out with another group of friends.

Today was actually decent with girl B - I was standing near her in the hallway talking to some guys she is also friends with when she initiated a converstion w/ me. Class was starting in a few minutes so it didn't last long, but i was able to say some jokes that definitely made her, as well as her friends, laugh. (btw I am always pretty light-hearted and jokingly around her and she always laughs so I figure it is working) Anyway, Im happy that she initiated w/ me for once...

Finally, this new girl i mentioned yesterday (we are good friends ....i really need to assign names to these girls ) started texting me for relaitonship advice for her. Im totally ok with this though because I'm just not interested in her at all but she is a cool girl and I think that by becoming friends she could hook me up sometime like i said yesterday.

 

[sportskid13]

Wednesday May 26

Wow, I cannot believe it's almost June. I remember back in February I would be reading posts here and think "Im gonna change before march...april...may..."and now it's almost summer. The time has really flown by, but it makes me realize how slow I've been moving and that I have to speed up.

Today was good - had great energy all day cause I went to bed early the night before. It really helped with my confidence, I looked in the mirror and thought damn I look good, lol. Anyway girl A and I seem to be getting really comfortable together (better friends I guess). Like I said, Im not really thinking of her as a real targetnow but it could definitely be a real possibility for the future.

I didn't talk at all to girl B today, pretty much on purpose. if I really wanted to I could have gone over to that group of friends in between classes but I stayed with mine because I'm not exactly part of that group although I am friendly with most of the people in it. I feel like it would be weird for me to just start going over there to talk all the time. Also, I might be wrong on this, but I don't want to see and talk to girl B every day cause I don't want to get into the friendzone with her. right now I'm staying "friendly" but not all over her. An I playing this right for now?

I think I made a good step today when I was talking to Girl C ( mentioned before) For the first time I thought to myself "you know what, she's not that bad". I still am not interested, but I'm happy I am expanding my horizons.