Finally left my wife

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bigwuz

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After 7 years of torture I left my wife. I live with some roommates but I'm so content she's been cheating. I'm also 37 years old now been visiting these forums for years now but stopped when I got married. I learned my lesson never marry keep your own place and talk to multiple women. Ive been attracting younger women lately also from ages 30-19 kinda weird but I'm active I think I'll keep coming here as I'm older but still relatively young
 
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BackInTheGame78

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bigwuz said:
After 7 years of torture I left my wife. I live with some roommates but I'm so content she's been cheating. I'm also 37 years old now been visiting these forums for years now but stopped when I got married. I learned my lesson never marry keep your own place and talk to multiple women. Ive been attracting younger women lately also from ages 30-19 kinda weird but I'm active I think I'll keep coming here as I'm older but still relatively young
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The lesson you should have learned is not to never marry it's to screen far better than you did and don't get comfortable in a relationship, always be on your game(although what this actually means changes over time in relationships).

Never marrying is simply a fear based behavior by people who don't know how to screen properly and it's far easier to not get married than it is to improve in that department. Like anything else, self improvement in any area takes hard work and honest evaluations of themselves, something many people are unwilling or incapable of doing.

But congrats on freedom, now do something good with it.
 
redskinsfan92

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BackInTheGame78 said:
The lesson you should have learned is not to never marry it's to screen far better than you did and don't get comfortable in a relationship, always be on your game(although what this actually means changes over time in relationships).

Never marrying is simply a fear based behavior by people who don't know how to screen properly and it's far easier to not get married than it is to improve in that department. Like anything else, self improvement in any area takes hard work and honest evaluations of themselves, something many people are unwilling or incapable of doing.

But congrats on freedom, now do something good with it.
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To play Devil's advocate: Would you sign a contract where the other party gets rewarded for breaching the contract and there is very little benefit to you signing the contract?
 
Gamisch

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bigwuz said:
After 7 years of torture I left my wife. I live with some roommates but I'm so content she's been cheating. I'm also 37 years old now been visiting these forums for years now but stopped when I got married. I learned my lesson never marry keep your own place and talk to multiple women. Ive been attracting younger women lately also from ages 30-19 kinda weird but I'm active I think I'll keep coming here as I'm older but still relatively young
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May I ask;
- what made it 7 years of torture?
- And does this mean you never felt like there was a honeymoon phase?
 
Barrister

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OP - good for you for pulling the trigger and dealing with a little bit of pain to gain your freedom. At first it really sucks but then once you are free from that bondage you feel like a new man. And being able to slay it again is quite a prize in itself. That said, I am sorry this didn't work out for you and, as you already know as a long time member, feel free to use the NC thread as needed.

I think we men can easily get to a point where we put up with a lot of sh1t from a hot woman. I think a lot of men also marry hot women who end up systematically ruining their lives over the course of years with increasing levels of b1tchiness and being demanding with little to no return. I am guessing what happened to OP. Screening not only is important, but it takes a lot of time. You have to get out of the honeymoon phase of the relationship before you can truly make an informed decision about a woman.
 
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Barrister said:
OP - good for you for pulling the trigger and dealing with a little bit of pain to gain your freedom. At first it really sucks but then once you are free from that bondage you feel like a new man. And being able to slay it again is quite a prize in itself. That said, I am sorry this didn't work out for you and, as you already know as a long time member, feel free to use the NC thread as needed.

I think we men can easily get to a point where we put up with a lot of sh1t from a hot woman. I think a lot of men also marry hot women who end up systematically ruining their lives over the course of years with increasing levels of b1tchiness and being demanding with little to no return. I am guessing what happened to OP. Screening not only is important, but it takes a lot of time. You have to get out of the honeymoon phase of the relationship before you can truly make an informed decision about a woman.
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all good points. What is the NC thread?
 
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BackInTheGame78

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redskinsfan92 said:
To play Devil's advocate: Would you sign a contract where the other party gets rewarded for breaching the contract and there is very little benefit to you signing the contract?
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Based on multiple studies, women gain financially in marriages, men gain health and life expectancy in marriages.

So to play devil's advocate to you, would you not get married even if you knew it would likely increase your life expectancy significantly?
 
redskinsfan92

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BackInTheGame78 said:
Based on multiple studies, women gain financially in marriages, men gain health and life expectancy in marriages.

So to play devil's advocate to you, would you not get married even if you knew it would likely increase your life expectancy significantly?
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Well, the problem there is if you get divorced or widowed your life expectancy drops right back down. So, for me it would only make sense with a thoroughly vetted woman and the right circumstances.
 
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ManFromTartarus

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OP didn't state if he got a divorce or just up & left.
If he didn't go to court, and he has kids, the court system is gonna put their foot up his azz, just wait till the child spt kicks in. He's going to be living off pork&beans and baloney sandwiches for a few years.

I think he should get back together with her, she doesn't sound that bad.
 
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bigwuz

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ManFromTartarus said:
OP didn't state if he got a divorce or just up & left.
If he didn't go to court, and he has kids, the court system is gonna put their foot up his azz, just wait till the child spt kicks in. He's going to be living off pork&beans and baloney sandwiches for a few years.

I think he should get back together with her, she doesn't sound that bad.
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I'm thinking that's a myth but u have to know how to go about things bro my child support is 49 for one 52 for another it goes down the more kids you have
 
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bigwuz

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Gamisch said:
May I ask;
- what made it 7 years of torture?
- And does this mean you never felt like there was a honeymoon phase?
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She cheated a few years back we got back together. Fine cool she treated me like straight doo doo then I started doing it back to her then she gets mad. So I get decent paying job she trying to get this dude to come over so I tell her I'm going to leave this past February I finally did leave she would use my car and cheat on me then get mad when I would ask to use it throwing this pity party in Facebook and I'm like ok
 
Murk

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bigwuz said:
She cheated a few years back we got back together. Fine cool she treated me like straight doo doo then I started doing it back to her then she gets mad. So I get decent paying job she trying to get this dude to come over so I tell her I'm going to leave this past February I finally did leave she would use my car and cheat on me then get mad when I would ask to use it throwing this pity party in Facebook and I'm like ok
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Sounds like an absolute nightmare. If only you could articulate yourself better :(
 
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