Field Report: Return of the ALPHA!!!

Teen Spirit

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Last night, I headed down to the local Outback with my training partner, Lex. A few steaks, mounds of potatoes, cold beer, and laughs were on the agenda for the evening. Getting pu$$y was not, but when you are THE alpha male, it's always a possibility.

So after the meal, and taking a huge dump in the men's room, we are paying the bill when Lex motions over to the bar. Couldn't believe what I saw. Four hotties laughing it up with a couple of college frat boys. I took off my aviators to get a better look at the guys.

Me: <squinting> Yep, just as I suspected, looks to be 13, maybe 14 inch biceps?
Lex: You thinking what I'm thinking?
Me: <grinning> Lets do it.

Me and Lex do the lat flare walk over to the bar area, sleeves rolled up on our 18 and 17.5 inch pythons, taking a seat nearby the aforementioned crew. I took out of my pocket my "trick money"; $100 dollar bills on each end, with about 25 singles in the middle. One of the girls saw this and flocked (If muscles are #1 on women's wish list, money is number 2 on their sleazy gold digging agenda).

Girl1: Hey baby! You gonna buy me a drink?
Me: <pulling down my aviators a bit> F**k would I do that? Do I look like your boyfriend or something?
Girl1: What's your problem? Figured your cheap ass could spare a drink with all that cash you're carrying.
Me: <condescendingly> Well apparently that's not the case, Shirley Temple. (She was wearing a Temple University sweatshirt) Run along to your skinny frat friends. You aint getting none of this (I flash the wad of cash) and you aint getting none of this (flashes 18 inch python)

<She runs back to her friends. Lex knows what's going on and gives me a wink. Not two minutes later, the whole group returns.>

Frat Boy: I'll be buying all you ladies a drink tonight, cuz I'm a nice guy.
Me: <takes a shot of tequila> More like an AFC if you ask me, chump.
Girls: What's an AFC?
Me: You wanna know what an AFC is? Follow me girls. <Me and Lex walk out the door, not looking back but knowing they will follow>

We take them across the street to an internet cafe. I try to log onto sosuave.com but its not working (apparently you have to PAY to use the internet at these cafes? I usually wouldnt be caught dead at one of those places. The depressed emo loser thing doesnt get you hot *****)

Me: Give me $5 so I can use this piece of s**t
Girl3: You have $2500 in your pocket, why cant you pay for it?
Me: I'm out of here. I cant deal with--
<All of a sudden girl 4 takes a 5 dollar bill out and i put it in the computer. I log onto the forum>

Me: <grinning> Read up, ladies.

The next few minutes, I hear the girls excitedly screaming "Oh my GOD, those frat guys WERE AFC's! And you guys are Alpha Male PUA's!". I grin at lex, knowing that we would be getting laid tonight. The girls read for about ten more minutes (even putting in 5 dollars to read more) before we all head back to the Outback.

Frat Guy 2: So about that beer?
<Sorority Girl 2 takes the beer he was drinking and pours it over his head.>

SG2: Get lost, you f**king AFC's!
FG2: What the f**K?
SG3: <rubbing my chest> yeah, we found some alpha males. Go back to the frat house and jerk off!

<With that, they leave, my grinning face the last thing they see. Me and lex piled the girls into my BMW and head over to their sorority house.>

That night, I was pleasured for hours by two sorority girls: a cute lil asian and her blonde friend, while Lex had the other two. Lex wakes me up at 7AM, telling me I need to drop him off at home so he can to to work. I walk out the door, sunlight streaming in from the morning sky.

"Wait!" one of the girls screams as I walk out. "are you ever coming back?"
<I sling my jacket over my shoulders and strap my aviators on>
"My mama said to never break promises I cant keep". Me and Lex lat flared back to my beamer and sped away from the house, never to return
 

Julian

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LMAO sweet.
 

Javelin44

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lol... you're joking if you think that computer part was true right? lol since when does a girl go OMG AFCS ... lol...
 

Wubbman

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It was believable up until she poured the beer over their heads and quickly shacked up with you. I call bull****.
 

IM0001

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hmm

If this is all true than it just seams a bit odd to me. I know you want to be the alpha and all but it seams so harsh to the guys they were with and to them after your done. Do women deserve no respect? Just meet, dump their skinny ass friends, 3some, leave never to see them again. Its more like using women which to me is kinda wrong. Show them whoos boss is great and all but im not into the F***em and dump em manauver. Still just my opinion. Also u should carry business cards to this site that you can slip to thoes AFC's before you left lol.
 

johnnyrem

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Pretty cheesy work of fiction. Sort of like reading one of those "apocalypse" shoot 'em up novels where the guy saves humanity and gets the chick, but she conveniently dies in an explosion so he doesn't have to have a long term relationship with her.

My guess is that Teen Spirit is pretty much a skinny nerd who is exercising crappy writing skills. He must have Ted Nugent as his literary inspiration.
 

SELF-MASTERY

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I hope this is a true story;)
 

OFWHAP

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This isn't teen spirit's first story like this. He has another one where he does a flex-off with some random guy at a party and then gets his knob-slobbed in the bathroom with the girl of his choice. I read it earlier today.
 

OFWHAP

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Apparently he got laid at a house party with a story under Field Report: Alpha Supreme and he got laid after a night at Outback on the same night.Field Report: Alpha Supreme


Check the date on each of these threads.
 

TizZle

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I can't stop laughing at this post. Good "story" man. If i was a blonde female with 36 Ds i might believe this sh1t.
 

theSpeculator

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Originally posted by Wubbman
It was believable up until she poured the beer over their heads and quickly shacked up with you. I call bull****.
I agree, this story is obvious BULL$HIT.

We take them across the street to an internet cafe. I try to log onto sosuave.com but its not working
However, I can believe he and Lex can do something as dumb as this.
 

tmpgstx

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.. and then the alarm clock went off ..
 

pootwo

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I don't know. D'ya think this is a biting satire on the shallow, vacuous embodiment of the so called 'Alpha male' that many people on this site strive to be?

Maybe this guy is trying to stop people being corrupted into becoming the person he describes by showing what a pathetic excuse for a human being that would be.

This post is either really clever or really juvenile.
 

Wubbman

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Originally posted by pootwo
I don't know. D'ya think this is a biting satire on the shallow, vacuous embodiment of the so called 'Alpha male' that many people on this site strive to be?

Maybe this guy is trying to stop people being corrupted into becoming the person he describes by showing what a pathetic excuse for a human being that would be.

This post is either really clever or really juvenile.

Good point. I would tend to think that it is more juvenile than clever.
 

Dapper Swindler

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Originally posted by OFWHAP
This isn't teen spirit's first story like this. He has another one where he does a flex-off with some random guy at a party and then gets his knob-slobbed in the bathroom with the girl of his choice. I read it earlier today.
Yeah I noticed that too. Both stories are equally hard to believe. Maybe they are true. But you know what? Why should I care. Either way, this is none of my business and is irrelevant to me. I should be worrying about myself instead or whether this guy is telling the truth or not.
 

MacDiddy

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Field reports are here to help people.. Not for establishing the reporters rep or credentials... For a FR to be helpful, it must be genuine.

Teen spirit, your FR seems very delinquant.... What say you???
 

Teen Spirit

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This is genuine. Gotta show these AFC punks who's the daddy around here.
 

MacDiddy

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Gotta show these AFC punks who's the daddy around here.
Ok ok... just keep your pants on...

Keeping an open mind, I can see where being full on ALPHA can work!!! just think bouncers...

pop quiz TeenSpirit: did you make any of the chicks laugh thru C&F comments? or was it unnecessary under your alpha frame???
 

MakeItSo

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Someone tell me if they think this was alpha male:

So this guy and his gf were hanging out with two of us. The other guy I was with is a natural DJ, which may, or may not have mattered.

In any case, her boyfriend left us, and she was hitting on my friend. So we get into this discussion about this and that, it was small talk, and then she says:

"Boy, you must think your God's gift to women," to my friend

And then I say: "Hey babe, you know there's a difference between a guy who thinks he's hot, and a guy who knows he's hot." and then i smiled.

She smiled back (in a good way) and then I said "I don't just think I'm God's gift to women... I think I'm God's gift to this Green Earth!"

Next day, I was the one gettin' all the attention.
 
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