Field Report: My fourth night out with Matt ala Casanova.

[Drex]

Ok this is becoming more like a journel of my progression and this field report is not going to be too long because I am starting to stagnate. Matt and I went out again last night to a place crawling with women and I still p*ssied out with cold approaches. Watched Matt do a couple though and he told me some great analogies that I'll share.

First field report

Second field report

Third field report

So Matt and I get to this club/billiards last night at about 10pm and it's packed with people. Women everywhere. The loudness of the place really cramped my confidence (live band)! The only way to talk to anyone was to yell in their ear, not a great situation for me to be learning cold approaches and conversation.

Matt did a couple cold approaches. The first girl Matt approached was standing next to her boyfriend, but we didnt know who this guy was and Matt wanted to talk to her. So he just casually introduces himself, gets her name and goes straight to the point "are you with that guy next to do?" she said yes, he's her boyfriend. "Ok nice meeting you" and we move on.

Next girl Matt approaches is hot, he told me she was a 9 to him. He stopped her as she walked by, no hessitation. Was incredibly loud so I couldnt hear them talking unless I put my face between them. She was all into Matt and he could have easily gotten her number but he chose not to. I asked him why? He thought she was smoking and she was really into him. He just told me "Because I dont need to...I know I can get her number, but I dont need it, I'm getting enough p*ssy right now."

So now Matt explains what he (a DJ) is in a great analogy. He said "Scott, this club is a water tank full of fish (women). Now 90% of the men here are AFCs, they are standing outside the water tank with their faces to the glass looking in. I on the otherhand, am the man with the net standing over the top of the tank, scooping up whatever fish I want."

So now we are sitting back and I am just watching. There's an HB standing by herself about 15 feet away, just standing there with a drink watching the band, nobody within 5 feet of her. I'm trying to muster up the guts to go and talk to her when another guy introduces himself to her and starts chatting away with her. Another opportunity lost because I'm too busy THINKING and not ACTING. So I tell Matt "Did you see that? Women have it way too easy, they just stand there and men come to them." So Matt tells me "You are right, they do have it easy compared to most men, but a DJ has it even easier than an HB. The vast majority of the time, the women have to wait for a guy to approach them, while a DJ can pick and chose as he pleases, he doesnt have to wait like the HB standing over there."

The Ball is in my court for the next hour or so and I fail to do any approaches, I do too much thinking when I see a chance and blow it. So Matt and I go sit at a table and there's a book of matches on the table. Matt picks up the matches and pulls one out, he puts the book of matches down infront of me and the single match down next to it and looks at me. "Scott, this match will NEVER light unless I try and strike it on the book, never." So he picks up the match and strikes it, doesnt light "It might not light the first time I try and strike it, and it might not light the second time" Then he lights the match "But it sure as hell will light as long as I keep trying, but I have to try. The match is never going to light itself if I just sit here and look at it."

What a great analogy! He told me to hold on to that book of matches as a reminder, and I'm gonna keep them on me until I get over my fear of approaching.

Hopefully I can tell you guys about my first cold approach next week.

 

[One on One]

Matt seems very patient and understanding. You're lucky to have such a good teacher, Drex. I'm sure it will all pay off soon enough.

 

[Drex]

Originally posted by dave134
Matt seems very patient and understanding. You're lucky to have such a good teacher, Drex. I'm sure it will all pay off soon enough.

He is VERY patient and understanding. I told him as we left the club last night that I did not want to go out with him again until I either did a cold approach on my own or got laid (by a girl I know at work that I am DJing). I told him I felt like I was starting to waste his time by not progressing. So he told me that I was not wasting his time because I'm his friend, he knows that I will get there soon enough because I'm sincerely interested in changing. Sure as hell is a good teacher, I'm very lucky!

 

[NINJA PIMP]

Matt sounds like Yoda and shyt. Dont worry Drex SkyPlayer, you will be a Jedi Pimp yet!

 

[stormwriter]

Damn, i love reading these "Night out with Matt" threads! Keep em' coming!

At first, when Matt said this, "they do have it easy compared to most men, but a DJ has it even easier than an HB. " i was thinking, "oh, now he's just blowing smoke. There's no way he can back up that statement.." and then i kept reading, and he really hit on something!

Think about this: The HB's, yeah, they get guys coming up to them ALL THE TIME. They don't have to work at it, but they have to SUFFER as a result of this. They always find themselves STUCK talking to idiots, players, or any dude that buys them a drink, and having to reject guys left and right.
The DJ, on the other hand, cuts through that bullcr*p and only approaches the women HE'S interested in.
I don't know about you, but i surely don't want to get stuck talking to boring chicks i'm not attracted to.

 

[Slickster]

Love reading your posts too. Great work both of you.

However Drex. 4 nights out and no approaches yet. C'mon man!

Analogies are great but you've just got to do it. Even if you go up and make a total fool of yourself who really f*cking cares? (That won't happen though)

The embarrassment will pass. You'll probably never see the chick again. Matt's not going to laugh at you and neither are we.

Do it!

 

[white_hype]

drex i like reading your posts but its just getting to be sad now man

just casually go up to a girl, you dont even need EC, and ask her like 3 questions, DONT TRY TO PICK HER UP

your putting too much pressure on yourself

just be like

HI

im drex, how are you

having a good time?

so who are you here with

where are you from

just start out like that, and after that just be like
nice talking with you but i have to get back to my friend matt, bye xxxx

just that simple, once you start a little convo you will see how easy it is and thats its not a big deal

dont worry about doing everything right, like its said to be done on this site

the chick doesnt even have to be hot or by herself, just think of her as a robot and you are practicing on her, nothing more

if she is a b1tch, whish she wont be if you just act nice, laugh and think of it as a good learning experience and what a b1tch she was

gl

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Drex: I agree with white hype, this is getting RIDICULOUS!!! I'm not trying to bring you down or hate on you. You've taken the 1st step by recognizing you need to get better with women, but I don't have a fukin' clue what your so scared about???

I'm not doubting that Matt is not a great teacher, I'm sure he is. He seems VERY patient, calm and confident. See if you can follow me on this analogy. A small skinny kid didn't get a supermodel physique by working out with Arnold right off the bat. How could he? Arnold is much too advanced in body and mind compared to the skinny kid. What the skinny kid needs is to start off with small, attainable goals and build up to Arnold's level. I think doing a cold PU is a little bit more advanced for a starter like yourself. Think about what doing a cold PU indirectly tells a girl....

It tells her your:

-very confident with yourself
-99% sure that you can have her "if you want to"
-know what to say, when to say it and how to say it.


If you can look over that check list and say you can confidently do all 3 of those things, then your ready for a cold PU, if you can't then you need to start lower.
Work on starting conversations with EVERYONE!! Ugly girls, fat ones, men, kids etc. Just become comfortable with talking to anyone in general. Practice this for a few weeks and build up the confidence. Then progress each week until you feel like Superman and you can't be stopped.


You can take my advice or laugh at it, but I think your a rookie trying to hang with the pros. There's no chance of that happening.



PIMP

 

[becker]

I think these things are great. Personally, I don't like to call them "cold approaches", nor do I like to approach with the intent of getting laid. It probably makes a rookie nervous. I just go up to the girl, introduce myself, and just see her response. If it is positive, keep talking, but if not, just leave.

I also think it might be better to do this stuff in a more tame environment. These clubs and bars might be a little rough for a rookie. I like less threatening environments to start out with. I think college is a great place to start, and there's that window where you should take advantage. If not, just go to a college campus anyways.

 

[Crotch Sniffer]

Originally posted by Pimp-sicle
You can take my advice or laugh at it, but I think your a rookie trying to hang with the pros. There's no chance of that happening.

Drex, please ignore this ignorance! you are doing the right thing. there is NO better training than to just throw yourself into the water and fukkin swim. as for pimp's arnold analogy, i will tell you this much. that skinny kid will make some great gains working with arnold, better than your average kid.

What a crappy attitude you have pimp! Shame on you!
Stop discouraging him. cant you see that the more he puts himself in these situations, the more he will realize that his fears are baseless? There is nothing advanced about approaches, maybe for you keyboard jockeys who sit there typin all day, but not for my man Drex, he can do anything if he puts his mind to it!

grrr!

 

[jakethasnake]

Wow - you're pretty wise, for a crotch sniffer. I agree. But Matt - get ON it already! You're using these posts and "field reports" as a crutch for real life success. I think you're afraid -- prove me and everyone else here WRONG.

 

[Knicknack]

drex you need to grab those balls and just start approaching. rejections are hilarious. i almost like them as much as getting numbers.

 

[Matt ala Casanova]

Originally posted by jakethasnake
Wow - you're pretty wise, for a crotch sniffer. I agree. But Matt - get ON it already! You're using these posts and "field reports" as a crutch for real life success. I think you're afraid -- prove me and everyone else here WRONG.

Prove what? I'm helping Drex, if you haven't read the past reports I would suggest going back and seeing the small transitions he is making. And as far as "get ON it already!" I am not sure what you mean? I have plenty of women and no problem with the ladies as Drex can confirm. I will just laugh at the next comment about using these posts for my real life success.

If you ever come up my way, I will glady show you in the flesh what it is like to be a Don Juan.

If you wanna start crap, PM me, but if you got something construction to say, say it.

M.A.C.

 

[Matt ala Casanova]

Originally posted by Pimp-sicle
You can take my advice or laugh at it, but I think your a rookie trying to hang with the pros. There's no chance of that happening.



PIMP

The kid is doing a fine job, this is only the 4th week he and I have hung out, I know of MANY suppose DJ's on this board take months trying to break their AFC ways. He is coming along just fine.

M.A.C.

 

[jakethasnake]

[deleted per MAC's request.]

 

[jakethasnake]

Oh, HOLY CRAP! I DID address you in my post! I am sincerely sorry about that, man. I meant to address Drex on this matter. Sorry for the mix up, no hard feelings.

 

[Crotch Sniffer]

I can't believe some of these posters!

You guys seriously neeed to lay off my little buddy Drex. This dude is at least making the effort, and sharing his experiences with us.

Where are YOUR field reports, huh? WTF are YOU jerkoffs doing with your time? When was the last time YOU went out into the field and made an ACTIVE effort to improve yourselves? Nooooo, you'd rather sit at your comfortable little keyboards and criticize others.

Fukking hypocrites.

Stop wasting your time and ours with your worthless words.

 

[Drex]

Hey guys thanks for the feedback. I have made what you could call a little progression tonight while at work. Here's the story:

I'm waiting tables tonight at the restaurant I work at (usually bartend). This married couple in their 40s comes in with another woman, this single woman is SMOKIN hot. Turns out she's 45! Holy crap she looks 30, and did I mention she has a knockout body and gorgeous face? So the married couple ask me if I am single and I tell them that I am. So they try and play match maker with me, at first, by trying to call over the waitresses and hook me up with them. I already know these girls so it's just a funny situation and I laugh it off. Then they start telling me how their friend (I'll call her milf from now on) is recently divorced because her husband was a loser, and they are trying to find her a new man.

So they ask me how old I am and I tell them 22 and milf jokingly tells me she's only 23. So I tell her "well you look it" and she blushes/smiles. So the married couple picks up on this and asks me if I am in to older women! I tell them, "sure why not!"

So the married chic turns and looks at milf, then looks at me and raises her eyebrows. Then she's like "naaaaah, you're too young for her dont you think?" So I say "Who says I dont like a more experienced woman that could show me a thing or two?" and they totally bought it, milf is just sitting there blushing while the married couple are laughing. I started blushing and they called me on it!

So the married woman then says "actually, you know, I do know a woman that is 90 years old and she's married to a man that is only 70, they've been together for a long time too." Then milf goes "well, I am 45 and he's 22, that's only 23 years!" and smiles (she was serious). So I'm saying "holy ****!" to myself by now, haha.

Next, married woman asks me where I get my hair cut. So I tell her I cut it myself. Then she tells me that milf is a hair dresser and that I should go see her sometime. So milf tells me that I do a great job cutting it myself but that I should come in and have her taper it. So she goes into her purse and gets a bussiness card out and gives it to me and then proceeds to tell me exactly how to get to where she works w/o me asking.

I continue to do a great job talking to them until they leave and milf reminds me to come see her!

Unfortunately I JUST cut my own hair 2 days ago so I dont need a new haircut for another couple weeks. Matt told me she just wants to f*ck me so I should call her up at work on tuesday and ask her if she'd like to go out for a glass of wine, so that's my plan, what do you guys think!? I dont know if traditional DJ methods are gonna work here. I mean she's 45 and just getting out of a long term marriage...did I mention she's hot as hell?

 

[Crotch Sniffer]

I knew you'd come around!

Dude

1. fukk young or old...she's a WOMAN
2. she knows what she likes
3. she really cound teach you a lot of funstuff
4. She is FEELIN you kid!

All systems go! You are doin great, dont change a thing! Keep it light, fun and flirty. Did I mention I am proud of you?

Wait a couple of days and call. She offered you a shape up, not a full on haircut, basically giving you an excuse to see her soon.

goodluck bro

 

[icepick]

Hey Drex, you should go for it. There is no better feeling than having a woman totally diggin' you, especially if you are having problems. As long as you don't fixate on her, you should be good I think.

It will give you a chance to get through that "transitional" phase from casually meeting to sexual things. Think about it, you are going to have to ride the wave from "Hi" to "Oh yes!". That can be tough when you first start out, and she will probably be more 'leniant' on you than other females.

Just keep in mind not to fixate on her or "fall in love" or whatever. I would say your main goal would be to get comfortable going from casual meeting to the sex act phase though.

Something similar happened to me a while back, though I didn't go for it. (For various reasons; but if I was in your position, I may have gone for it.) You are right, some women can look exceedingly fine at older ages if they workout and take care of themselves. Gives me hope if I choose to settle down later in life, I can have a decent wife for 20 years.

p.s. I like these posts! Very encouraging. Can't wait for the one where you say "I've done it! I am a winner with women!" You will get where you need to be man. MAC is a good guy for helpin' ya out, my hat's off to ya Matt!