Field Report - critiques welcome brothers

[LucidDreamer]

Had a blind date on saturday. Kept it light, got some sushi in DC. I'll just go over some things i may have done wriong, along w/ a self critique.

possibly bad things:
1. Didn't open the car door for her when i picked her up (big deal)
2. Was indecisive with dinner plans...i asked her if she wanted to do coffee or dinner, wavered a bit, i probably should've been more decisive.
3. complimented her 3 times...probably shoulda kept it to one
4. asked her if she wanted to do this again....probably shoulda just set another date.
5. dropped her off and as she turned around to wave goodbye & smile i was already on my phone.
6. asked too many closed ended questions.
7. not too many laughs, gotta work on that.

good things:
1. opened door when it rained
2. paid the entire bill after she offered to pay half
3. didn't brag about accomplishments
4. didn't ramble

that's about it.

 

[cave dweller]

ok

Dreamer,

Ask her out again.

Question for you:

What do you have to loose?

cave dweller

 

[Slickster]

No response needed for this thread.

You know your mistakes and know what you must do in the future.

Go for it.

 

[LucidDreamer]

nada my friends, ain't got ****e to lose. she's in syracuse for thanksgiving, i'll prob call her monday night -- about 9 days after the date....too late?

 

[Desdinova]

You're analyzing what you did on your date, and you're learning from what you've experienced which is excellent! This is the only way to make progress. There is a couple of things that I have to add:

2. paid the entire bill after she offered to pay half

It's good she offered to pay half, and I would have accepted her offer, especially for the first few dates. Don't get her used to you always picking up the tab.

When it comes to opening the car door, don't go out of your way to do it. If you're heading to the car and the passenger door happens to be on the side you're approaching, open it for her. If you're approaching the driver's side, don't bother.

Good luck on future dates!

 

[Eileen]

Originally posted by Desdinova
When it comes to opening the car door, don't go out of your way to do it. If you're heading to the car and the passenger door happens to be on the side you're approaching, open it for her. If you're approaching the driver's side, don't bother.

And this works for you?

I'm never flattered when a man gets a door and I get the impression that he's doing it to score points. However, there are few things sexier than a man who does those things seemingly without thought or effort.

Not that I think any of you really care ....

 

[Walden]

good things:
1. opened door when it rained
2. paid the entire bill after she offered to pay half
3. didn't brag about accomplishments
4. didn't ramble

that's about it.


Good form in general.

You sound liek it was a "date", where you show up with candyand take her out and entertain her. I find these really slow me up. I might have a date as my day 2 but never more than once to secure a beach head , or you fall into that husband material date frame and never get to tap that ass.
Genrally 'd be inviitng her over to watch a DVD at this point. Your next move maybe?

 

[Genghis Juan]

Definitely need to keep the laughs going. Try to think of some funny stories to tell her.

Calling her 9 days after the date is a bit too long though. I would call her in the middle of the week following the last date to keep the trail warm.

Keep us updated.

 

[Chrispy]

"5. dropped her off and as she turned around to wave goodbye & smile i was already on my phone"

This made me crack laughing a bit...besides what you did right/wrong, did you not get a good feel for her?
Anyway, give her a call again, when you're feeling energetic and enthusiastic, and ask her out again. The 'being funny' part may be better a second time round (1st date jitters?).

 

[Desdinova]

And this works for you?

Yes, it's a happy medium. It shows that you're polite, but not desperate. A guy is going to look incredibly desperate if he runs over to the other side of the car, opens the door, then runs back to his side.

Opening her door can also give you a hint how her IL is. If she unlocks your door for you, it's a good sign.

 

[LucidDreamer]

Originally posted by Chrispy

Anyway, give her a call again, when you're feeling energetic and enthusiastic, and ask her out again. The 'being funny' part may be better a second time round (1st date jitters?).

I think so....i can normally be pretty funny...just getting back into the multiple dating scene, actually had this one girl lauging for a while on the phone. i played this one nice, didn't tell her when i'd call again even after she asked "so when are we gonna hang out", i said my schedule's very busy which it is...as far as whether we'll hang out, i'll let HER worry about that.

 

[PocoDiablo]

I think you have a handle on it.

I got a suggestion about treating a woman like a "bratty little sister." It works well for me, but I am a laughing joking kind of person. If she cannot handle you making fun of her and making jokes, you might not want to do that.

Also, I try to keep my mouth shut as much as possible, and ask her lots of open ended questions so I can find out what kind of person she is. Then I decide if I want to date her again or not based on who she is!

So where'd you go for sushi? Was it any good? I love sushi and am always ooking for a new place!

 

[LucidDreamer]

Originally posted by PocoDiablo

So where'd you go for sushi? Was it any good? I love sushi and am always ooking for a new place!

Eh, tono sushi in woodley park...alright little place. if i want something nicer, i usually go to Saki or Perry's in AM and also Sushi Taro on 17th; japone in dupont, that's about it.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Desdinova
...

It's good she offered to pay half, and I would have accepted her offer, especially for the first few dates. Don't get her used to you always picking up the tab.
...

It may or may not have been good that she offered to pay half. She could have been attempting to show that she isn't a professional dater OR she didn't want to end the date feeling that she owed you anything because she had already decided that she was not going to see him again.

How do you tell which? When she offers AND you've done a fair bit of qualifying her, pick up the tab this time and suggest that she gets the tab next time. This will also let her know that you would like to see her again. If her IL is VERY high, you could go ahead and set up your next date.