Field Report#10 : Date with girl at waterfalls

[Ryan]

1) The Girl

• 22 year old
• Type-->> Nerdy Engineering student , has a part time job (hard worker)
• Looks: 6.

2) How we met

• She Liked me on Bumble.....we chatted a bit on Bumble...then I escalated to text (she doesnt have Whatsapp)...then we chatted a bit over text,asked her when she was free she said only Tuesday.....I said ok maybe we can hangout on Tuesday.
• I texted her" What are you looking for?" she replies "Im on the fence about what I want, whatever makes me happy"
• Monday night she texts me asking "Can I book you in for tuesday? I'm planning my day for tommorrow" I reply "yes please, what is the fee for no shows? lol" I suggest meeting at the waterfalls, she replies can we meet at coffeeshop b/c she will be tired (she gets up early), and then go to the falls from there: I am like ok. I told her I would be bringing some beers, what kind would she like? She says "any kind will do"
• She texts me that she is bussing there, I wanted to offer to pick her up from her house, but I remember @Desdinova telling me that its better ifyou get them to meet up with you.

3) The date

• I show up 5min late, nervous as hell. I notice she is not as attractive as in her pic, I see her in the corner and we chat about her day for a bit and then she suggests lets head over to the falls, we take my car to the falls
• We walk around the falls with the 10% strong beers I brought, she tells me how she likes to come here to destress with her mates, we talk about our siblings (which we both dont get along with), her family then we sit on the rocks and continue to talk and we start drinking the beers.
• I slowly start some kino, run my hand on her leg, later I rub her back, put my arm around her.....the beer is starting to get to me.
• Then she suddenly turns toward me and says "Now I am going to face this way with a devilish smile " I'm like ok sure (Im not as articulate verbally as I am on text), then she says " I know what you are trying to do .....and I'm going to go with it!" then she leans into me and we kiss for like 5min straight
• Then she says its dark we should start heading back to the car (was cold), we walk back to the car holding hands, and im buzzzed from the beer (not that drunk),
• I told her Im a bit buzzed, not going to drive (but I wasn't that drunk) ,in the car we sit more and talk, im rubbing the back of her neck ross jefferies style (google it) then she says "Its gettign late I need to get back home" (it was like 8h45, we met at 730) then im like chill for a bit and ill drive you back...she was like no its only one bus there. Shes like I'll text you to let you know that I got home safely.
• She steps out the car, and im like "You forgot to give me a hug"......she returns to the car and I go in for the kiss and we kiss a bit, and she says she has to go.

4) Aftermath

• I texted her as soon as she leaves "Your lips taste like maple syrup" (told her im from beverly hills lol) --------->> yeah I know it was a mistake later that night I texted her to she if she got home ok.......no reply. I texted her earlier tonight....no reply
• Now I see she unmatched me on bumble
• Yeah I will admit I am not that confident/nervous when sober around girls...thats why I like to drink on dates (DONT USE THIS AGAINST ME!)

Where did I go wrong? I was surprised that she ghosted me given we made out and held hands , thought it was going good.


Ok so rate and critique?

Thank you for your time.

@ImTheDoubleGreatest! @Igetit! @3agle3yes @MrWood @dude99 @RangerMIke @marmel75
@logicallefty @VladPatton @sph21 @Alvafe @Mauser96 @Julian @JohnChops @Mazer @Desdinova

 

[sph21]

I texted her" What are you looking for?" she replies "Im on the fence about what I want, whatever makes me happy"

You're too soft. You have to be decisive. Asking her, "What do you want to do with me" is like telling her, "let's do something boring together because I'm too scared to come up with an interesting date idea myself". Girls don't know what they really want. If she likes you a lot, it doesn't matter where you take her. There're exceptions, though.

I told her I would be bringing some beers, what kind would she like? She says "any kind will do"

Why did you do that? It's like telling her, "I care way too much about this date and I'm going to provide you with these beers. I need your permission of what kind of beers to bring with me".

Then she says its dark we should start heading back to the car

then she says "Its gettign late I need to get back home"

You weren't leading her. She took the lead because she was bored by what you're doing at the moment.

later that night I texted her to she if she got home ok

This is another mistake. She's a big girl. She can take care of herself. Do the opposite next time. If her IL is high enough, she'll be the one to text you. She'll show you how much she care by asking that question.

What you did right is that you showed her that you're a sexual man. You just need to work on your leadership skill.

 

[MrWood]

• we kiss for like 5min straight

• Then she says its dark we should start heading back to the car (was cold), we walk back to the car holding hands, and im buzzzed from the beer (not that drunk),

• I told her Im a bit buzzed, not going to drive (but I wasn't that drunk) ,in the car we sit more and talk, im rubbing the back of her neck

so she throws you the sex bomb lets make out, and you retort after with holding hands and a neck rub? She tells you she will tell you if she got home ok, and you go full AFC Romeo on her before she sits down on the bus. She knows you only want to have a BF/GF relationship TOMORROW, and she told you:

"Im on the fence about what I want, whatever makes me happy"

this is code for "i want to not have anything that even comes close to a BF/GF feeling"

but you decided to hold her hand and rub her neck.

 

[marmel75]

She senses you are going to be one of those desperate stage 5 clingers who is way too into her already.

 

[Ryan]

She senses you are going to be one of those desperate stage 5 clingers who is way too into her already.

Thank you for the reply @marmel75

What would make her sense this?

 

[Ryan]

so she throws you the sex bomb lets make out, and you retort after with holding hands and a neck rub? She tells you she will tell you if she got home ok, and you go full AFC Romeo on her before she sits down on the bus. She knows you only want to have a BF/GF relationship TOMORROW, and she told you:


this is code for "i want to not have anything that even comes close to a BF/GF feeling"

but you decided to hold her hand and rub her neck.

Ok what are the signs... That a girl just wants to have fun vs. is serious about a relationship?

What would @MrWood do different on that date?

Thank you .

 

[MoreThanSmooth]

Drinking 10% beers and driving...do you do that often? Because a lot of girls would be turned off by that behaviour. It's reckless and especially dodgy if you're driving her around responsible for her safety.

I know everyone has their tolerance but 10% isn't the usual weak p*ss you get at most bars. I'm 6 ft and 16 stone and I could drink a pint of 3-5% maybe, but a pint/bottle of 10% would definitely be no driving for me.

Not worth the risk of killing a kid or something.

If you're "buzzing", that's normally code for "don't get in a car". Don't mean to sound like your mother, but it struck me as irresponsible.

EDIT- Okay I see now you said you weren't going to drive back, fair enough.

 

[Ryan]

Drinking 10% beers and driving...do you do that often? Because a lot of girls would be turned off by that behaviour. It's reckless and especially dodgy if you're driving her around responsible for her safety.

I know everyone has their tolerance but 10% isn't the usual weak p*ss you get at most bars. I'm 6 ft and 16 stone and I could drink a pint of 3-5% maybe, but a pint/bottle of 10% would definitely be no driving for me.

Not worth the risk of killing a kid or something.

If you're "buzzing", that's normally code for "don't get in a car". Don't mean to sound like your mother, but it struck me as irresponsible.

EDIT- Okay I see now you said you weren't going to drive back, fair enough.

No I would never drink and drive Officer

 

[way2smart]

You did nothing wrong. It's just that her interest level wasn't that high to begin with. Or she was just bored that day and decided to go out with you or whatever. Or she met someone substantially better in terms of LMS. Again I don't see any major mistakes that would turn a woman off

 

[MrWood]

• Then she suddenly turns toward me and says "Now I am going to face this way with a devilish smile " I'm like ok sure (Im not as articulate verbally as I am on text), then she says " I know what you are trying to do .....and I'm going to go with it!" then she leans into me and we kiss for like 5min straight

• Then she says its dark we should start heading back to the car (was cold), we walk back to the car holding hands, and im buzzzed from the beer (not that drunk),

• I told her Im a bit buzzed, not going to drive (but I wasn't that drunk) ,in the car we sit more and talk, im rubbing the back of her neck ross jefferies style (google it) then she says "Its gettign late I need to get back home"

you held her hand walking back (AFC BF/GF) and you talk in the car, oh, and rubbing her back now... pvssy was wet, now its all dried up

you literally de-escelated her excitement

MrWood would have kept up the play, tickling her side on the way to the car, warm up her ear and rear.. kiss her when opening the door...

 

[Ryan]

You did nothing wrong. It's just that her interest level wasn't that high to begin with. Or she was just bored that day and decided to go out with you or whatever. Or she met someone substantially better in terms of LMS. Again I don't see any major mistakes that would turn a woman off

So being tipsy wasn't a mistake? ( I dont drink that weak yankee beer...only really strong european ones!!)

and she unblocked me on bumble like that night! (did you read the OP?)

feel like messaging her on fb

 

[Ryan]

you held her hand walking back (AFC BF/GF) and you talk in the car, oh, and rubbing her back now... pvssy was wet, now its all dried up

you literally de-escelated her excitement

MrWood would have kept up the play, tickling her side on the way to the car, warm up her ear and rear.. kiss her when opening the door...

So no hand holding on first dates? (thats surprising)

@MrWood

 

[MrWood]

read the flow as I highlighted, its quite clear, as it was when when you op'd

she wanted to play, you wanted to pet her backside

 

[Ryan]

you held her hand walking back (AFC BF/GF) and you talk in the car, oh, and rubbing her back now... pvssy was wet, now its all dried up

you literally de-escelated her excitement

MrWood would have kept up the play, tickling her side on the way to the car, warm up her ear and rear.. kiss her when opening the door...

Then when you get to my small car.....then mad makeout, and start the car and drive to my place? lol

 

[elunium]

you have been here since 2000? 18 years ?

The problem is you took the safe route. "...what beer do you like?", "...where do you wanna go?"... You even highlighted the "she" in your post.
She had to make all the decisions because you didnt. Girls arent attracted by that because in the end they know you are not making the decisions to avoid rejection and disconfort.
You gotta know what you want and go for it. She is along for the ride.

 

[marmel75]

Thank you for the reply @marmel75

What would make her sense this?

Women have a sixth sense when it comes to this...look how you acted immmediately after the date. Women know when guys are desperate.

 

[MoreThanSmooth]

No I would never drink and drive Officer

*Southern drawl* "Well son, I'm afraid state law is that you gotta be strip-searched..." *gloves*

 

[Ryan]

Needy behavior all throughout. This is how most afcs act on dates and then think it went great.

She’s experienced this enough times to know the pattern. You’re no different than the average guy that tries to get into her panties. You were just what was available at the time so she ran with the attention and good feels.

Other than that you didn’t really stand out or excite her

@MidnightCity

Ok how do I excite her then?

 

[Ryan]

Maybe stop trying to take random tinder girls looking for dlck on romantic dates and trying to act like a bf

Do something unexpected. Something she’s not used to expecting from a guy. She’s en engineering nerd. Probably has a shlt ton of pent up sexual frustation.

Ask her if she’s ever had sex by the water fall, Take her to a strip club, buy her a lap dance, get high with her, just whip your dlck out while your driving and tell her to give you head. Idk man use your imagination

Ok describe to me how @MidnightCity would of handle the date differently ?

 

[Ryan]

So I have read over some of the posts , and the issues I have noticed are

1. Try to excite her , make the date more fun
2. If the girl wants to 'play' then I should not act like I am her bf (hold hands) @MrWood
3. Dont ask what she chooses (beer)
4. I dont let her make any decisions @elunium
5. Dont get too into her / act like a clinger

Thanks for advice.