Fictional question
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wait_out
Master Don Juan
I appreciate all the replies and here's my take on what we have so far:
1) Being happy can compensate for not being wealthy. Being overworked is unhealthy and will kill your game;
2) More deliberate lifestyles do not translate into better women or even more respectful behavior. Don't think you can crawl out of the crab bucket that easily.
3) The reason to have an empire is because you want to live in it 24/7 (ie. relax in the tropical paradise you built). Intentionally building an empire for women is a roundabout way of doing things. Less time/exposure to women will always equal less opportunity!
4) Either of these guys can be a good long-term prospect if they spin it right.
Personally it seems too close to call, which implies any advantage of either guy is negligible. If either of these guys gets into a relationship, then, I suppose it comes down to choosing the right girl -- in which case #2 might actually be at somewhat of a disadvantage due to less experience.
1) Being happy can compensate for not being wealthy. Being overworked is unhealthy and will kill your game;
2) More deliberate lifestyles do not translate into better women or even more respectful behavior. Don't think you can crawl out of the crab bucket that easily.
3) The reason to have an empire is because you want to live in it 24/7 (ie. relax in the tropical paradise you built). Intentionally building an empire for women is a roundabout way of doing things. Less time/exposure to women will always equal less opportunity!
4) Either of these guys can be a good long-term prospect if they spin it right.
Personally it seems too close to call, which implies any advantage of either guy is negligible. If either of these guys gets into a relationship, then, I suppose it comes down to choosing the right girl -- in which case #2 might actually be at somewhat of a disadvantage due to less experience.
Kailex
Master Don Juan
I used to be #1. I turned into #2.
And let me tell you on a personal level, I am a LOT more happy being #2 than #1. Why? Because I am doing what I want to do when I want to do.
Not only that, but I place a higher "bar" on the women I'd want to go out with. Basically, my free time is precious and I'd rather spend that free time with a range of higher quality women than going out on a bunch of first dates and flings with anyone that has female anatomical parts.
Thus, there is no real answer to who is the real prize, because the real piece of information missing is: Who is happier in their current position?
Just because I'm happier being #2 than #1, doesn't mean that is the case for everyone else.
But I did notice that since being #2, I've eliminated a LOT of the riff raff I used to see myself "dating" in the past. Then again, I don't overwork myself that much, I find a nice balance for myself.
And let me tell you on a personal level, I am a LOT more happy being #2 than #1. Why? Because I am doing what I want to do when I want to do.
Not only that, but I place a higher "bar" on the women I'd want to go out with. Basically, my free time is precious and I'd rather spend that free time with a range of higher quality women than going out on a bunch of first dates and flings with anyone that has female anatomical parts.
Thus, there is no real answer to who is the real prize, because the real piece of information missing is: Who is happier in their current position?
Just because I'm happier being #2 than #1, doesn't mean that is the case for everyone else.
But I did notice that since being #2, I've eliminated a LOT of the riff raff I used to see myself "dating" in the past. Then again, I don't overwork myself that much, I find a nice balance for myself.
zekko
Master Don Juan
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This is exactly what I was thinking.Kailex said:
I'm sure Guy #1 is going out with more women, but that quantity doesn't make him the prize. That may seem counterintuitive to a PUA, given all that we hear about preselection.
Guy #2 has more limited time, so he's less likely to want to waste his precious time with Goodtime Sally. The main thing for Guy #2 is that he has to realize he's the prize.
I still say if Guy #1 is so good socially, he should be able to network himself into a better job.
Good post Kailex. I pretty much hold the same views myself.Kailex said:
You see, my whole beef with #1 is if he's content making an average salary but wants to date lots of women then why not make money doing something that actually puts him around lots of attractive women?
DJ, bartender, club promoter, musician, marketing/advertising, party planner, etc...
Rather than making $40000 a year at some dead-end desk job then spending whatever precious time leftover on the nights and weekends chasing skirt....while the guys working the jobs I mentioned above not only easy female attention and social proof, but get paid for it as well.
backbreaker
Master Don Juan
This is me as well though my time as a number 1 was very short lived.
The mistake in the OP's ananlgoy is assuming that the number 2 guy doesn't like having fun and is not a well rounded guy, simpoly because he has goals that he wants to accompli8sh and knows some things have to be done to get those thigns accomplished.
It's not like the guy, doesn't like having fun or doesn't like doing things, and I"m sure he finds time to unwind in his own way, but he isn't a "okay it's 5pm, it's MY TIME now" type of guy most guys are.
Not only that, it's what your definition of fun is.
When you are 40 years old, do you want to go to the horse track and bet a couple of hundred bucks on a horse and maybe win or do you want want to go to the race track when you are 40, with a group of friends and family, taking a picture in a winners cirlce after you just won a grade 1 race. There is nothing wrong with either. My dad was the first guy and I love my dad. I'm the second guy.
There was this chick I kinda was feeling before I went into hermit mode that wasn't my oneitis. and when we started taking our company seriously she would complain about how we weren't "fun" enough while she would go on dates to places like ihop and el chico eating 6.95 "mexican" dinner specials and all you can drink margaritas. Some people can't or don't want to see beyond that. She's probably doing the exact same thing 10 years later. Looking forward to a guy that will 'spring' for red lobster.
3 weeks ago or so, I took my wife to gordon ramsey's on san vacintnie. We eat somewhere "really nice" about once a month.
I'ts not that I didn't like going out. I just want more more to life then cheap margaritas and red lobster (though I do like red lobster)
Frankly i could never be the number 1 guy because the things I think that are fun, cost too much money to do. We go on about 1 vacation a month. My wife and I go out to do something 2-3 nights a week. 10 years ago I was stuck in my room programming until 3-4 in the morning, 6-7 days a week.
There is absolutely nothing different between that person then and this person now. I liked going out then, just as much as i liked going out and being social now. I just knew that it wasn't the time for that.
I don't get trying g to make one better than the other. That IMHO reeks of an inscure person. Whenever someone sees someone that is working towards something or has some money someone wills ay "well he must not be very happy beucdase he works too much, he doesn't live a balanced life". It's like that person is trying to turn being a regular person into a moral thing or something. Not that it's immoral, but this isn't a morality issue.
As far as being a catch,I am probably more of a catch than I was when I was younger, but I am also more well rounded. If I was just a fat slob who didn't know **** about women, a guy with no game and a happy outlook life could probably plow any woman i had.
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zekko
Master Don Juan
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I'm glad you brought that up, because "fun" has sometimes been a sticking point for me. To me, "fun" means building up my skills, in a sport or hobby or whatever. Doing or building something I want to do. Or maybe relaxing after a hard day's work. As opposed to going out drinking and going "whoooo", which is very mindless.backbreaker said:
I did that in my 20s, but at some point it just got to seem very dumb and boring. So you would think I would not make a good DJ in this day and age. I definitely wouldn't fit into the "RSD" mold, which is very club oriented: "Let's have fun!!! Whoooo!!" Odd thing is, women seem more attracted to me since I've left that stuff behind. Maybe it's because I'm being more true to myself now.
backbreaker
Master Don Juan
i'm the same way. If i have a few hours to kill, and i want to do something completely mindless, I mean, don't get me wrong I play the **** of my ps3 lol, I"d be lying otherwise (arkim city is pretty bad ass), while my wife provides color commentary of what I should be doing and why I keep dying (the most fun we have had in a while was us beating resident evil 5 together, while she could play as the chick and i could play as chris at the same time. we beat that game in about a week), more times than not i will go to the gym and go swimming. that's fun to me. or play my piano.zekko said:
even when I am "well balanced" and "not working", my "fun" rarely consist of beer drinking and "kicking it" with my "friends". I just have more interesting (to me) **** to do.
the irony of my life being, the more "work oriented" i became, the more b balanced life I actually started to live..
just how "balanced" of a life is going to work, coming home, watching TV, jacking off 3-4 times to some *****es on the internet, drinking beer, watching the office, watch the daily show, go to bed
The more isolated I became from everyday society, at least for that time in my late teens early 20's, the more I started to have to try to occupy my time with things I found interesting. like the piano. Like weight lifting, like listening to jazz. like learning how to properly maintain a sal****er fish tank. Like learning about presidents. The irony being, even in my most reclusive state, i was probably living a more "balanced" life than 90% of America. I just wasn't getting any *****.
sodbuster
Master Don Juan
Only problem is unless your dad is rich, the passive income isn't going to fall in your lap unless you are guy #2 first.
Of course. Atm I'm guy #2. In fact I do have a tropical oversea property. I'm not doing any of this for "a partner, if one can be found that measures up" though. I'm doing it so I can be guy #1, pursuing my passion for the arts. Plus a lot of pvssies, of course. 