Fiancee lying to me

[BULL3TPR00F]

He didnt take her virginity. She had one other boyfriend when she was 17 but he cheated on her. He then asked her to marry him but she didnt accept it. She was only 17 then

 

[evan12]

Thank you everyone for the comments.

I do feel like what she did was disrespectful to me. I told her that I do not want to book a wedding hall for a wedding, and need a break from her.

Backbreaker: We are both 26 years old.

Atom Smasher: I never caught her in other lies, but I get vibes from her that she is shady. She isn't open and I feel that she hides things from me.

We also had other issues before this occurred. We lived together for 9 months, but I decided it would be best if she lived back at home. When we lived together we argued a lot and I couldn't deal with it anymore. I bought a condo before we got engaged, and she always mentioned how it "wasn't hers" and wants to buy a house. She doesn't have a job and doesn't have money saved, so that is impossible. I paid for the condo, and paid for everything else when she lived here (her food, etc). It was better for her to live with me because her college was close to my condo. When she lived at home her commute to school was very far. I felt that she did not appreciate me because she always complained about things. The priest we spoke to said that I shouldn't have been reminding her that I pay for everything.

We made an agreement that I would pay for the condo (and all other expenses, utilities, food etc) (it is a beautiful big two bedroom condo in a great neighborhood and school district) and she would pay for the wedding hall. I didn't mind paying for the condo and her food while she saved her money to pay her school debts and save for a wedding. Her dad was giving her half the money of the wedding hall, so she only had to save for half of the wedding hall. She complained about this after we agreed to the deal. She said shes not getting out of anything by saving for a wedding because the condo is under my name and the wedding is over in a day.

She also pressured me by putting a time on when we have to start having kids after we are married. We also argued about holidays because she wanted to spend both Thanksgiving and Christmas day at her families house. It upset me when she said our future kids would decide where to go on holidays. We discussed this and came up with a solution to alternate where we go each year.

she is training you to play on her rules . may be she intentionally let you see her message with bf so see how much you will really get angry , if not so then she will have a window to have affairs with other men .

 

[sageproduct]

https://rationalmale.wordpress.com/2012/01/04/five-minutes-of-alpha/

Just watched the music video for the first time.

HOW DID THE GUY GET HIS TATTOO REMOVED IF HE ACTUALLY DROVE OFF A CLIFF AND DIED?!?!

 

[SSBS]

She has two facebook accounts.

She is communicating with an ex and lying about it.

She is unemployed.

You pay for everything.

How many red flags do you need? Dump her immediately.

 

[speed dawg]

I think you have to walk away from this. If it was just the facebook stuff, well, you could say that you shouldn't have been in her business. But since there are tons of other red flags, I think you need to get the ring back and bail (if the ring was expensive).

She was obviously using you so she could stay closer to her school too. Easy to see this. Then you say she seems shady. Well, she probably is. She has ZERO flexibility and always makes you go see her family, on HER turf.

I'd get out of this pronto. But we know the drill, you have one-itis. Unfortunately, it's going to be a long road of learning ahead of you. But we all had to start somewhere. I suspect this girl will tear your heart out before you really come back here wanting to learn.

 

[Die Hard]

so to put this in perspective you put a ring on a girls'f inger who has dated all of one man for the entire time she's been an adult lol.

She is NOT an adult. She's a nagging, spoiled, self entitled CHILD who needs a foot up the ass.

Bulletproof, from what you've told us, this woman sounds like she is loooow class. Why did you even considering marriage with her? No offence, but I would not be surprised if you have had only a few girlfriends in your life, have never been good with women, always got manipulated by women etc. and now you just decided to marry some girl at the first chance you got.

 

[BULL3TPR00F]

Thank you everyone for your comments. I am going to spend time and reflect for the next few days. I feel that this relationship is over.

 

[sodbuster]

YOU FEEL it's over? That's chick BS. What do you THINK? She argues all the time, has another facebook account to talk to her ex,has you over at HER family for everything, has told you when she wants kids? [the sooner she wants to start, the more likely she is trying to get another hook in you]



Do a Facebook search on her name...see if she comes up in 2 places

 

[JST8828]

Fortunately here everyone has given some great advice already so I'll make this one short.

When she showed me her messages, I saw my name mentioned in one of them. She immediately grabbed the phone, logged out, and signed into a different account (hers).

The second this happened I would have ended the relationship on the spot. Actually, to be honest I would have ended it the second I found out she was having any communication with her ex. Life is full of heartbreak, some situations a lot worse than others. This is a bad case and I feel you, but at least you know what the right move is. The girl can't be trusted, and clearly has plenty of other issues on top of that.

I think after you end it you should take some serious time to just cool off (date other women if you are ready) and while doing so just thank GOD that this didn't happen once you were married, or else you'd just end up with an asterisk next to your marital status just like half of the world.

Stay strong man.

 

[st_99]

break it off and get married in your 30's bro.

you are not ready, she is not ready. neither of you are equiped to make this work.

date some more, figure sh!t out about girls, mature, try again in 5 or 6 years.

 

[GotED?]

This thread so far has been the most prominent example and reason why I keep coming back here and try to do what all other posters have attempted to do:

To be a brother to each other at an anonymous place in the cyberspace where nobody knows what impact is made with what we reply to in threads but for most of us I think in our heart we hope one less man out there will get hurt because some of us know better already.

There are many pessimists out in this world but I believe we men here fight hard for each other to learn and see a better day in who we are and with women in the end.

With respect,

Exodus

 

[Zarky]

Classic example of why guys shouldn't marry (if at all) before they're AT LEAST 30 and preferably 35.

 

[BULL3TPR00F]

This thread so far has been the most prominent example and reason why I keep coming back here and try to do what all other posters have attempted to do:

To be a brother to each other at an anonymous place in the cyberspace where nobody knows what impact is made with what we reply to in threads but for most of us I think in our heart we hope one less man out there will get hurt because some of us know better already.

There are many pessimists out in this world but I believe we men here fight hard for each other to learn and see a better day in who we are and with women in the end.

With respect,

Exodus

This forum has already changed my life, and has always given great advice in the past. I forgot my password to my old account, but I read my old posts and read the advice from years ago and put a smile on knowing I made the right choice by listening to you guys.

 

[yuppaz]

Hey Mate - the thing that really bothers me about this is her whole "but the condo is yours not ours" thing. That implies to me that she is upset that you own it before you are married and she knows she won't get it in divorce...That's pretty sketchy stuff. If she seems shady on top of that, or even if we just look at that it's not looking too good. I could see one like that marrying you, getting you to sell the condo buy a house (boom now you BOTH own it, with BOTH your names on the deed, get prego's through you or boyfriend #2, divorce you and get the house and 18 + years of child support payments while she bangs some other dude in the house you are still paying for while you live like a pauper.

If she was cool with the condo, I wouldn't be nearly as skeptical

 

[Pair A Dice]

At least get her to do some nasty, freaky **** before you break up with her. You owe that to her, at least.

 

[Cheeks]

You shouldn't be marrying a woman that was getting railed by another guy before you for 7 years.

 

[XR 600]

This is my first post...had to comment.This chick is NO GOOD.Shes a complaining,lying pain in the ass.Shes gotta go,or shes taking you down bro.

 

[XR 600]

Hey Mate - the thing that really bothers me about this is her whole "but the condo is yours not ours" thing. That implies to me that she is upset that you own it before you are married and she knows she won't get it in divorce...That's pretty sketchy stuff. If she seems shady on top of that, or even if we just look at that it's not looking too good. I could see one like that marrying you, getting you to sell the condo buy a house (boom now you BOTH own it, with BOTH your names on the deed, get prego's through you or boyfriend #2, divorce you and get the house and 18 + years of child support payments while she bangs some other dude in the house you are still paying for while you live like a pauper.

If she was cool with the condo, I wouldn't be nearly as skeptical

Brutal,and could very well happen!

 

[Down Low]

if you choose to stay with her take the phone and call her ex and told him to not contact with her or else

Which is a damn manly thing to do. Problem is, I've gone that route before, and the ex went to her mother and complained that I threatened him.

WTF?

Yeah that's right. They both believed they had the right to continue fvcking the ex on the side while they both also had new main partners. So much so they told mommy on me.

OP, go NC.

Though I think the worst was really that you two tried living together, and it didn't work. If it didn't work in the past, it won't work in the future.

My attitude is that Facebook is a hookup site. It's either Facebook or me. No negotiation on that one.

 

[mrRuckus]

Classic example of why guys shouldn't marry (if at all) before they're AT LEAST 30 and preferably 35.

I'm almost 33 and still feel 24, but better. I have no idea what use I'd have for marriage unless I wanted children at such a young age for some reason. Even then I don't know why you'd need to be married to have kids.m 35 for getting married sounds crazy to me. That's smack dab in the middle of the male peak; why waste it on one chick?