female friends are all attention *****s

[DJArlington]

Have you noticed that even all of your female friends are attention *****s??? This is getting nuts, I never thought it would ever get this bad. They are all about themselves. What happened to the quality of women? I will refer to the other threads on this topic, just kind of frustrated.

 

[true romance]

who give a **** about AW..go out, flirt and bang them....Have fun with them

turn lemon into lemonade

 

[DJDamage]

You can't blame women for being women.

All women are AW's on same level.

 

[STR8UP]

ALL women crave attention. I think that is what you are referring to. Most women aren't OVERLY attention starved.

I have one AW friend that I have known for many years. It has given me a chance to watch her actions and reactions, and by now I feel that I know what makes true AW's and what makes them tick.

I have a feeling you aren't talking about true AW's. A true AW is an extroverted female who needs validation on a constant basis. They often have self esteem issues, and use this external validation to "prop themselves up". They NEED other people to pay attention to them or they would deflate like a balloon.

The rest of the chicks I know aren't AW's, and I know quite a few of them.

 

[Juando]

They NEED other people to pay attention to them or they would deflate like a balloon.

Good line STR8UP.

I've been spending (wasting) some time on Facebook and it's amazing what an AW magnet it is, like Myspace I suppose-

 

[STR8UP]

The main reasons why I don't have many female friends because all they want to do is talk about their problems to you or even worst use you.

Fukk that.

I will allow a certain amount of "venting" as I would with ANY friend, but I do not allow women to vomit their emotional baggage on me like I'm their sympathetic girlfriend or something.

The key is to make sure that ALL of the women you hang out with see you as a Man, a sexual being, a DOMINANT force. If they look at you in that way you don't ever have to worry about being taken advantage of.

A good friend of mine, who I am also friends with his g/f, well, one time the g/f tried calling me up telling me how her b/f (my good friend) had kind of pushed her or something during an argument. At the time she was seriously pissed that I "wouldn't do anything about it". I was like "WTF woman! What do you want me to do?"

I think after that call she respected me even more for not stooping to the level of AFC sympathizer. I know that it certainly didn't affect the way we interact. And guess what? This was a year ago, and they are still together to this day. Matter of fact, we are all going out tonight. She was simply pulling some chick BS since she didn't have a girl to vent to, and I let her know that it wasn't ok to come at me with something like that.

I remember there was this one chick I used to be friends with she would complain about her life sooooo much and I would listen to her and help her. But one time I was going through a tough time and told her some of my problems and what does she do she acts like she didn't even hear what I said. She didn't even comment, all she did was change the subject back to her. I cut her off completely.

That's why, as a Man, you can't ever let them see you sweat. You talk to your MALE friends about problems. Not your g/f, not you female friend, your MALE friends.

Women LOATHE weakness in men. Women will kick you HARDEST when you are down. That's why your interactions with women need to be limited to the fantasy realm, not reality.

My AW friend is like this. I have learned to let her vent from time to time, but when it comes to MY problems, I keep my mouth shut. If I start talking about my problems, she will say something along the lines of "Oh, well you think THAT'S bad....."

Not worth it. Female friends are a great resource for having a good time and meeting chicks you are actually attracted to, but you gotta be a Man and draw the line.

You gotta keep the ho in check whether she's your b!tch or just someone you hang out with. Treat them all the same.

 

[DJDamage]

Women LOATHE weakness in men. Women will kick you HARDEST when you are down. That's why your interactions with women need to be limited to the fantasy realm, not reality.

That is very true.

I remember a poster on this forum said something similar which I think it was:

"women cannot feel empathetic towards a man and respect him at the same time".

 

[reset]

I've noticed women stop talking to me about their problems. I never really thought about it until now, it just doesn't happen anymore.

I used to do that like most guys here did at one point. It's most likely because I drift off and and sort of space out when it happens. Yeah you should listen but you can tell when she's just getting something off her chest like any other person, and when she's using you as a validating mechanism where the expected response is something like "oh, you're such a great girl though. That's not fair. No, you ARE good enough..." etc.

I don't know how much of it is that they want a GUY to listen to their problems, as they want attention. If talking about their "problems" gets them attention, that's what they'll do. If talking about their "problems" gets them less attention than before, they will do something else.

My sister tells me a story of how she started calling her husband at work and was just whining about stuff that didn't really matter, and finally he cut her off and said, "you know what you need? A gay guy. You need a gay guy that you can call and talk about all your problems and feelings to."

She said she appreciated him even more after that.

 

[STR8UP]

That is very true.

I remember a poster on this forum said something similar which I think it was:

"women cannot feel empathetic towards a man and respect him at the same time".

As tempting as it is to vent to a woman, NEVER do it. Maybe if you are established in an LTR and it is a problem that effect both of you and you need to discuss it, that's one thing, but the last thing a woman wants is a guy who feels sorry for himself, complains, etc.

I made this mistake recently when I was down in the dumps. I confided in one chick I know about some of the sh!t I was going through. Even if I hadn't told her, she knew I was going through a rough time just by my demeanor and the way I looked, but I put the icing on the cake by laying my problems out on the table. And guess what? This same woman who used to be head over heels for me lost attraction.

Now I can't say for sure that this was the REASON she lost attraction, but it certainly didn't make things any better.

Another thing is that as a man, if you are a go-getter, people are impressed and they tend to build you up in their mind. They WANT, actually NEED someone to look up to, and this goes x10 for women.

It serves no purpose to tear yourself down to other people. I know it sucks that as a man you really have no outlet, but maintaining your status as a "rock" will ultimately help you get to where you want to be in life, then most of the sh!t you felt you needed to get off your chest won't matter anyway.

If you need someone to talk to, go to a therapist, your parents/family, or MAYBE a close guy friend. NEVER go to a woman.

 

[reset]

The good thing about this, is that if you are really strong and do not make it a habit to vent your feelings and frustrations, well let's face it as human beings there are going to be times when we are stressed out as hell and even if we try to hide it, some of it's going to show through. I think at this point, a woman who does look up to you and knows you as a person who is strong, will sense this, and try to cheer you up, and as it works she feels like she won the lottery.

 

[MR_PERFECT]

A lesson I've learned is to be careful which male friends you confide in. I have a friend now that brings up things from years ago whenever we talk about women - the subject of women seems to be the weak spot of most men. He likes to make little comments to bring me down in some way.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Women have Boyfriends and Girlfriends.

If you're not ƒucking her, you're her Girlfriend.

 

[Fallen]

It serves no purpose to tear yourself down to other people. I know it sucks that as a man you really have no outlet, but maintaining your status as a "rock" will ultimately help you get to where you want to be in life, then most of the sh!t you felt you needed to get off your chest won't matter anyway.

If you need someone to talk to, go to a therapist, your parents/family, or MAYBE a close guy friend. NEVER go to a woman.

Amen. Learning this the hard way during the last months.

Women have Boyfriends and Girlfriends.

If you're not ƒucking her, you're her Girlfriend.

True. True.

 

[reset]

If you're not ƒucking her, you're her Girlfriend.

This means every man is the girl's girlfriend if they just met. But I see your point.

One thing is funny is I am way more open about the details of my life to people online who I will never meet in person yet somethings I won't even tell my close friends.

 

[STR8UP]

This means every man is the girl's girlfriend if they just met. But I see your point.

I agree with Rollo most of the time, but the whole "If you aren't fukking her, you are her girlfriend" thing is waaaay too black and white.

It should read "If you are spending time with a female only because you hope one day she will allow you to touch her pu$$y (while she uses you only for attention and validation), then you are her girlfriend"

It's an offensive statement to me because it implies that if I hang out with women who I am not currently fukking, I'm somehow less of a man.

While this "girlfriend" logic certainly applies to the guy who lets women take advantage of his friendship, it has nothing to do with the guy who GETS as much as he gives when he hangs out with females.

If one of my female friends tries to suck me into her girly world (and I'm not saying they don't try), I explain that I don't hand over my balls to anyone. They usually get the point.

Seriously, if you take this statement at face value you are missing out on a whole world of opportunity to have fun and get laid.

Maybe I can talk Rollo into rollin' with my posse for an evening when I have some females in tow. Going to BM tonite if you're down buddy. You might even get to meet my AW friend. Wouldn't that be fun!

 

[slaog]

There is a good reason why I think women are not attracted to men who get depressed and moan alot. I think some people gets upset too easily. They see the negative side of things and usually those people have many "issues" too. So naturally when women see this they know that as a person you're not mentally on solid foundations and so an alarm bell goes off in the womans head.

It serves no purpose to tear yourself down to other people. I know it sucks that as a man you really have no outlet, but maintaining your status as a "rock" will ultimately help you get to where you want to be in life, then most of the sh!t you felt you needed to get off your chest won't matter anyway.

Women need men to be masculine to feel attracted to them. Be a rock and women will have high respect for you.

 

[SayWord?]

I need to stop complaining about my problems.matter of fact,is telling some of them that I don't have a car(but I don't give a damn anyway.I'm always busy and work/school stresses me out.a lot of girls always try to put me in a good mood.but right now I'm trying to make time to chill.its hard out here

 

[DJArlington]

STR8UP - You bring up some great points; I never even thought women lost attraction to you if you, as a man, confide in them about your problems; or at least complain a lot; I can see how all that would work against you in terms of attraction. What about an LTR ? Are there certain problems you would want to keep yourself?

 

[STR8UP]

STR8UP - You bring up some great points; I never even thought women lost attraction to you if you, as a man, confide in them about your problems; or at least complain a lot; I can see how all that would work against you in terms of attraction. What about an LTR ? Are there certain problems you would want to keep yourself?

You can discuss problems with an LTR, but I would recommend posting them on a message board or talking to someone else, ANYONE else before you do that.

When a woman is with a man, her value is directly proportionate to his. A chink in his armor means she chose a weak man. Not literally, of course, but each little chink will eventually whittle you down to a vulnerable, weak, unprotected being that women are NOT attracted to.

My ex used to tell me that I am her "sanctuary".

Ever wonder why a woman likes to cuddle up next to you at night when all you want to do is kick her out of the bed so you can get some sleep? It's because you provide her with a feeling of security. Your masculinity is a sign of strength, and it is directly tied to how she perceives you as a Man. If you get upset and get all sensitive around her, you get Manpoints taken away. It's especially important that you are aware of this in the beginning of a relationship cause before a woman is "hooked" she is looking for your weaknesses. When you are in an LTR you have a little more leeway, but don't take it for granted, trust me.

 

[Jitterbug]

I learned it the hard way after talking to some supposedly close female friends (some I've known for 15 years) about my problems a few years back. STR8UP is right: women are the ones who will kick you *hardest* when you're down.

They love to get us to talk though. They always give you that line "talking about it will make you feel better!" Better for women, maybe. Men need solutions, not talking about problems. Women can just talk about problems and feel good because there will be plenty of men turning into Captains Save-A-Ho and fix their problems for them!