Hey guys. I've been browsing these forums for a while and thought I'd post. I'm just kinda stumbled on this one. Why is it that an attractive girl will get so much more attention than an equally attractive looking guy? So many of the guys I know always compliment the girls about their looks, but you rarely see the chicks compliment the guys. I've been told (and know) I'm an extremely good looking guy. I'm not saying this to be a jerk or anything. I'm the best looking guy out of my group of friends. But for some reason my friends seem to get more attention from the chicks (socially anyway). For some reason they just seem more comfortable around them than me. My personality is how it is. I'm not ****y, just extremely confident, much more so than most of my friends. Though some of the girls think I'm a jack@$$. I don't know how this all ties in, but I was just curious on what you guys think.
Female beauty vs. Male beauty
- Thread starter Galaxy51
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[DoN.2.Da.JUaN]
Don Juan
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if they think your a jak@ss maybe ur blinded by your ****yness and think its just confidence :S?
how do you act around girls that would make them wanna stick around your friends more than you? do you make em feel uncomforatable?
how do you act around girls that would make them wanna stick around your friends more than you? do you make em feel uncomforatable?
I've encountered similar situations.
I'm of the mind that females use appearance to justify notions of people based on other factors.
For instance, if a guy date-rapes a girl, it becomes public knowledge and he is socially frowned upon, girls will *then* point out aspects of his physical appearance and use that against him.
For instance, they could call him ugly and fat, with obvious spite, while simultaneously being warm and fuzzy friends with an uglier and fatter individual.
For these reasons I'm inclined to believe that attractiveness for women is primarily a collective social construct, ie. How popular is he, how many women want him; with personal magnetism/personality being a distant second.
Here's a personal example. I'm told that I'm extremely good-looking often, but not on a daily basis. When it is mentioned it's made out to be a strong point rather than a "you're kinda cute".
Despite this I often don't even catch girls looking at me, and I compare my situation to when I was 'pulling' beyond my own understanding.
The difference is that before I was a prominent social figure. Now I'm much less social and have deviated substantially from collective social values (ect.).
Anyhow; in the same way that 'ugliness' only becomes a factor when others are abhorrent of that person, I believe 'looking good' works the same way, such that you must be socially prominent/well liked for your attractiveness for it to actually make a positive difference. Otherwise it's just the odd person who is somewhat extricated from the social stream who will appreciate your physical virtues.
I'm of the mind that females use appearance to justify notions of people based on other factors.
For instance, if a guy date-rapes a girl, it becomes public knowledge and he is socially frowned upon, girls will *then* point out aspects of his physical appearance and use that against him.
For instance, they could call him ugly and fat, with obvious spite, while simultaneously being warm and fuzzy friends with an uglier and fatter individual.
For these reasons I'm inclined to believe that attractiveness for women is primarily a collective social construct, ie. How popular is he, how many women want him; with personal magnetism/personality being a distant second.
Here's a personal example. I'm told that I'm extremely good-looking often, but not on a daily basis. When it is mentioned it's made out to be a strong point rather than a "you're kinda cute".
Despite this I often don't even catch girls looking at me, and I compare my situation to when I was 'pulling' beyond my own understanding.
The difference is that before I was a prominent social figure. Now I'm much less social and have deviated substantially from collective social values (ect.).
Anyhow; in the same way that 'ugliness' only becomes a factor when others are abhorrent of that person, I believe 'looking good' works the same way, such that you must be socially prominent/well liked for your attractiveness for it to actually make a positive difference. Otherwise it's just the odd person who is somewhat extricated from the social stream who will appreciate your physical virtues.
well im good looking too... so ill leave it at that.. now .. your problem is that girls.. dont like guys that are better looking than them.. they fancie you but are jealous of your looks and will try to knock your confidence by ignoring you.. its happens to me and other goodlooking guys... when in a group wth girls.. the girls will blank you out.. and you were the reason they started chating you and your friends but as soon as the conversations kick off.. no matter how much input you put they subtly blank you out.. i have had cases were this insecure girl almost ran me over with her car.. why?.. i dont know.
women are just too insecure.. i keep telling good looking guys to go for the girls that shows you direct interest with no games. if they show insecurity **** them and leave thier asses. better yet ignore them.. but note the more you ignore them the more they hate your guts.. dont make eye contact with girls if you good looking doing that will knock your confidence.. cuss they will try to bring you down.
walk like you dont give a **** about them and they will try to get your attenshion. this works for me ..
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oh definately experience it has happened to me many times at first i said is it my social or coversational skills?.. i worked on improving my self socially and told a friend to observe when we talking to a group of girls and 80percent of the time im blanked out.. so i know its not my fault..no matter how i try to be the life of the convo the same thing happens and they dont usually make eye contact... theyd rather look at the less attractive guys, and also i got some experience from observation by watching, i work for a modelling agency as an editor partime and i see it happen to these guys regularly when we all out drinking now dont get me wrong women all have thier eyes on them and
these guys are higly intelligent and have good convo skills but same thing happens to them.. and when a girl from the group gives them attention they are ****blocked by the other less attractive females in the group. the best way around this is if your wingmen work on talking to the rest while you isolate one female to open up to you. thats what i do anyway when i approach girls in groups. i usually like approaching girls alone anyway.
Even though women and men are both attracted to physical beauty, I believe women may downplay it more because they understand better how it affects people. Since women are almost always completely judged initially on how they look, there would seem be some truth to this. Women also seem to have higher standardards in what they consider to be attractive. Because of this, women also have a broader definitinion of what is attractive.
This is definately good news for those DJ's who are less than fortunate in the looks department.
Also, I think women are less likely to give compliments to guys about there appearance because partially it detracts attention from them. Most women don't want to play second to guy in the looks department.
This is definately good news for those DJ's who are less than fortunate in the looks department.
Also, I think women are less likely to give compliments to guys about there appearance because partially it detracts attention from them. Most women don't want to play second to guy in the looks department.
upcomingDJ
Don Juan
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maybe they're intimidated by your good looks..... try smiling more so they feel more comfortable around you
So FLY
Don Juan
Women just feel more comfortable around "average" men, when they are around good looking men, they tend to blow you off, i'm the best looking one in our group, but most of the time the average guys get more attention
Its a powers struggle-a battle of egos-MEN VS. WOMEN...In a situation such as this the woman may very well think that a guy is handsome but would not comment on his looks because she doesn't want to enlarge his ego or power..
Rollo Tomassi
Master Don Juan
What you're asking isn't a question about beauty, but the communication of attraction between the sexes. It's very simple - men and women communicate in defferent ways. Men communicate overtly and women communicate covertly. Men are generally expected to be initiators and therefore overtly communicate intent to women (as in always complimenting girls on their appearance). Women communicate covertly, because it is in their best competitive interests to do so since it naturally establishes themselves as the PRIZE to be attained while competing with other women for the same goal (i.e. the hot guy).
Feminine Communication Skills
Have a read here about this.
Feminine Communication Skills
Have a read here about this.