Feeling jaded after break up--power goes both ways.

[rutgersman]

Once my girl was calling me all the time and emailing me. Then I would ignore her and she would send me nasty emails saying she didnt associate with players anyway! I knew she liked me when she sent me emails like that.

Then she ignored me for a while and then and I would send her nasty emails! Now she has blown me off for good. Hence, she is now my ex-girl. I saw her with a fat slob the other night. The fat slob looked like a real man.(Tshirt, fat gut, tall, full head of hair.) Maybe he smelled better than me? Whatever the reason she finds him more attractive than me cause she is with him. It kills me because I am still crazy about her.

Now she has the power over me and it hurts like hell. She prolly laughs at me for being a wimp. She breaks up with me..and then toys with me for 6 monhs afterwards giving me false hope. I want to smack her around for all the abuse she caused me.

I want to gain the power back and blow her off. I have dated many women after we broke up....but I still think of her....so in essense I havent moved on. She got the best of me. I want to get even with her. The only way to do that is to be seen with another woman who is much younger and hotter. But the chances of seeing her are slim to none.

This power trip.....and yes games are played in any relationship--and games can be downright desrucitve and can injure your pease of mind. But sometimes keeping power over a woman gets boring. Sometimes I like to be submissive. Why do i always have to be the dominant one? My best friend is the most masculine guy I know and yet his girl controls him and he is submissive and they are happy.

 

[amoka]

Masculinity is not neccessary implies you're the dominant one. Is your friend an AFC?

 

[rutgersman]

No Afc

hes mans man..loves contruction work and shooting pool...quiet type...doesnt have high sex drive...doesnt really care about chasing women....they come to him...but his girlfrend controls him...whatever she asks..he does...she tells him to take out the garabge,,he does it.

 

[Vulpine]

Rutgers, you might have the impression that he is controlled by his woman, but it might not be accurate. There are certain sacrifices that people make that are in the spirit of fairness. For example, you ask dude to go out Friday and he says he can't because of the woman. Now, what he didn't elaborate on was perhaps he made plans to attend a wedding with her. He declined because he's honoring plans he already had, not because he's a wuss.

I think it's common for guys to jump to a conclusion that "his girl has him wrapped around her finger" or "he's p-whipped" when it's not actually the case. Sometimes dudes just don't communicate things that they aren't particularly proud of. I know that I don't like to go to weddings per se, but if the LTR asks me to go, and I don't have conflicting plans, sure, I'll eat someone's food and drink their booze - heck, the sex after attending a wedding is friggin' awesome. So, yeah, I'd go, but I wouldn't brag to my buddies about it.

As for your body of text before you mentioned your friend, the sooner you don't care and stop dwelling on the negative, the sooner new hotties will throw themselves at you. Their isn't one single positive thought you could have about the ex, so just plain stop thinking about it. It really is that easy.

 

[DJDamage]

Now she has the power over me and it hurts like hell. She prolly laughs at me for being a wimp. She breaks up with me..and then toys with me for 6 monhs afterwards giving me false hope. I want to smack her around for all the abuse she caused me.

Just leave the girl alone and move on with your life and if you can't then go see a therapist or something (You do need help).

 

[Sinistar]

This is sounding familiar, perhaps your best advice so far was from the last thread you started on this topic:

RUTGERS, there are 3 pages of responses here of guy's offering you some pretty solid advice (including my own) and all you do is insist on taking everything personally rather than objectively, which leads me to believe that you're more intereested in crowing atop your own pile of sh!t than seeking or accepting the observations of others. I wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt, particularly considering your own emotional state, but all you're doing is taking the conversation to ridiculous extremes, and now it seems this is more to bait others than actually further your understanding. This is the mental pattern and behavior I'd expect of a teenage boy, not a Mature Man, and leaves your actual age suspect.

(notice I left out the last line of Rollo-T's response)

Dude you are stuck in a Malaise of rationalization, justification and severe Paralysis by Analysis. You know if you were to re-read your posts 6 months from now you will be ashamed of your self (and hopefully laugh). So why not advance your frame by 6 months right now. Or is it more enjoyable wallowing in your current state?

You have what most women do not, the ability to recognize emotion, put it aside and think and act rationally & logically (like a fvckin' Man). You know your logical mind is screaming the following FACTS:

1.) The relationship is over, any contact beyond now will be toxic
2.) My best & only course of action is to willfully stop thinking of her
3.) She was not unique, I will meet/fvck/enjoy many other women.
4.) I WILL SURVIVE without her in my life.
5.) The other dude is not better than me, maybe he's just better for her right now.

And I'm really curious why are you so seemingly jealous of a "a fat slob"? Isn't that sort of ridiculous.

Last item. You're anger. Obviously you're still cranked up with emotions. However, do you really think it wise to be writing all these threats of violence in an open forum. I would suggest thwarting that urge from now on and go find a really good book (or two) on Grief, it will distract you for awhile and you'll probably understand where the anger is really coming from.

 

[Desdinova]

Not this again

She prolly laughs at me for being a wimp. She breaks up with me..and then toys with me for 6 monhs afterwards giving me false hope. I want to smack her around for all the abuse she caused me.

Awww, you poor little girl. Here, let daddy kiss it better....

This is the kind of mindset that is keeping you from moving on. You're playing the part of the poor, defenseless victim when you should be playing the part of the survivor. You survived a LTR with a lousy woman. YOU SHOULD BE A HAPPY MOTHERFVCKER!

You're also letting your imagination get carried away with you. You're imagining them sitting around, constantly talking about how much of a pu55y you are. Then, you come on here and say, "Don juans? My ex and her new bf are laughing at meeeeee "

It's all in your imagination. So you got kicked down and 5hit on. Don't just sit there and cry that you got your pretty clothes dirty. Get up, brush the 5hit off, and move on! 5hit washes out. Scratches and cuts heal as long as you don't pick at the scabs.

When you realize that you're much better off without her and that you can be successfully single, what her and her new bf discuss becomes irrelevant. What she thinks of you becomes irrelevant.

But the longer you wallow in 5hit, the more you feel like 5hit.

 

[SoCalMike]

Now she has the power over me and it hurts like hell. She prolly laughs at me for being a wimp. She breaks up with me..and then toys with me for 6 monhs afterwards giving me false hope. I want to smack her around for all the abuse she caused me.

Dude, your profile says you're 27. Is this sh*t for real? You sound like a little 14 year old b*tch. Grow up, and move on. This is some of the most pathetic sh*t I've ever read from a so-called "man".

And you wonder why, with this mentality and maturity level, that you're having trouble with women?

 

[MacAvoy]

RUTGERS, .....which leads me to believe that you're more intereested in crowing atop your own pile of sh!t than seeking or accepting the observations of others. ..... This is the mental pattern and behavior I'd expect of a teenage boy, not a Mature Man, and leaves your actual age suspect.

Thread closed (regretably).

Is it now acceptable to start up an identical thread under a new title after one has been closed?

 

[SoCalMike]

Is it now acceptable to start up an identical thread under a new title after one has been closed?

i'm almost convinced this dude is a troll. i still can't believe a 27 yo "man" would post this kind of snivelling garbage.

 

[rutgersman]

hi there i am doing fine

 

[Desdinova]

hi there i am doing fine

Good! Then you won't mind if I close your thread.