Feeling Guilty For Pushing A Guy Away

[penkitten]

Originally posted by TooColdUlrick
guilt is one emotion that chicks are wholly incapable of dealing with. you and wyldfire need to get together and watch Waiting To Exhale or Steel Magnolia's or something.

i'm sick of chicks on this web site.

o sheesh. its not a new thing that chicks are on this forum. lots of us have been here for years.


to the original poster, he doesnt seem to be what you were looking for in the first place, no worries.
you can not make someone be loyal and faithful to you. better that you found out now, and not later.
its just time to move on from this one.

 

[penkitten]

Originally posted by libre
A kiss is just a kiss.

you should start saying this more often in those posts that say "help afc got dumped by ljbf "

 

[Hayley79]

i just think its weird that before i started avoiding him and said a couple of *****y things, you guys were telling me to "next" him and he's a jerk, i'm getting played.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=78663&perpage=20&highlight=hayley79&pagenumber=2

now i say that i acted badly, and feel bad about it (not because i am sad i lost him, but because i Genuinely feel bad... and embarrassed) and now everyone is saying i'm a spoilt *****y princess type thing. and he's so mature... but what i failed to mention is that he would get all pissy whenever i mentioned hanging out with my guy friends... and the girlfriend he has coming into town lives in another country, so thats why i freaked at first. i shouldn't have done that... but he wasn't really doing anything to calm me down about it either and tell me its nothing to worry about, until after 2 days after.

i know, i feel like some kind of fvcked up person in a lot of confusion. i probably deserve to be somewhat told off and given a cold hard look at reality.

anyway... damn. i want to call this guy. i am tempted to right now, but i don't know if he would give a crap about hearing from me.

 

[penkitten]

dont call

its not worth it

less is more

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

Hayley, you are already the perfect you.

good night

 

[TooColdUlrick]

Originally posted by penkitten
o sheesh. its not a new thing that chicks are on this forum. lots of us have been here for years.

i didn't say it was new, i said i was sick of it.

this thread is pathetic...three chicks in a guys locker room talking about girls' problems.

 

[Hayley79]

toocold, think of it as your chance to get a message across to one lady, who can spread it to many more...

and last time i checked, i'm not typing this inside a locker room.

 

[Evangenlion]

wow, female bashing all round. even male bashing.

:crackup:

women vs men

opinions vs opinions

Hell!!

can't say this has helped anyone one. but this is where i sit back, relax and have a laugh

 

[SAYNO]

TOO-COLD-UlRICK YOU ARE:

Right!

Its amazing to me how this happens. I remember a couple of years ago on www.americanwomensuck.com, it was all men and things were just fine, then all of a sudden men start letting women post there..

I just don't get it, men are far more tolorent of women than women of men.

Thats also one reasons why men have so many problems with women. Not enough men are willing to call women out on their bull****. Thats why; heaven forbid one day a women will be ??????, saving this for my next post.


Sayno

 

[iqqi]

Hayley, I have been there, and know what it is like when you go for it with someone who has betrayed your trust and has commitment issues, you can read my current
thread here.

Sometimes I really wish I would have just walked away the first time he showed me he wasn't ready for what was developing between us, despite what he might have been crying, and otherwise showing. Once trust has been lost, and not enough done to prove it should be given, that whole idea of wonderful dissipates, and can be very hard for a girl to endure.

are you really just lonely? give up the dude, but stay tuned to the boards here! they really can help alot, and help you develop the thick skin you might need dealing with these types.

 

[Kenturkey]

Hey Haley...

Hayley, what you're seeing here a lot of pent-up male frustration being misdirected at a hapless victim. In this case you.

I don't blame you for being confused at the ambiguity on here. Sometimes I get confused by it too. Not as confused as I get when dealing with women, but sorting thru the advice and sifting out the important truths is a skill that is learned, not inherent.

It sounds like your guy made a mistake. Was it disrespectful? Yes. Was it malicious? Probably not. Does it diminish your trust level? Yes, but if he's honestly repentant, I say forgive him. As we traverse from our teenage relationships to our adult ones, forgiveness is one of our most important traits. You can't go thru life cutting each others throats over little things. You end up on dating forums trying to figure out how you screwed things up. ;-)

I think in this case too much has happened for either of you to realistically salvage this relationship. You should probably use it as a learning experience and move on. Keeping in mind that when you do something and you feel bad about it later, that you're probably not supposed to do that to anyone ever again.

I think forgiveness in this case is yours to give, not to receive. Not that you're not deserving of it. I'm not making that judgement. You just need to forgive him for yourself, and hope that you both end up somehow happier because of this.

Sorry so this was so long.
Chris

 

[joekerr31]

chris,

are you gay?
hehe, just joking.
good post.

J

 

[iqqi]

Originally posted by TooColdUlrick
and now a fourth woman, as twisted as they come--the infamous IQQI. if i recall correctly, iqqi is the one that likes to date criminals and dudes that beat her up?

you recall incorrectly.

you sound a wee bit confused. the worst of my man issues was cheating. what have you been smoking, son?

anyhoo, any updates from kaley on this?

 

[Chrispy]

Your job has a lot of travel, which might mean you should choose someone who's more grounded, trust worthy, and not looking around for someone else while you're away.

If you go back to this guy he'll just cheat on you again. How hard is he trying to get you back besides being a wuss? Any gifts? Taking you out and treating you well? If none of that then u know the answer.

 

[TooColdUlrick]

Originally posted by iqqi
you recall incorrectly.

you sound a wee bit confused. the worst of my man issues was cheating. what have you been smoking, son?

anyhoo, any updates from kaley on this?

my apologies...you were going back and forth to guys that treated you like dirt, and cheated on you, whilst giving another chick advice on how she should avoid these types of men.

 

[SoCalMike]

Originally posted by Hayley79
ibut what i failed to mention is that he would get all pissy whenever i mentioned hanging out with my guy friends...

Only a chump would consider a serious relationship with a girl who has "guy friends". He obviously made it clear he didn't like it yet you refused to listen.

This is probably why he didn't bother to take you seriously, kissed someone else, etc.

Wake up.

 

[Hayley79]

haha, you think this is all because he acted pissy one time because i have guy friends? i can't even begin to count the ways of how ridiculous this is, and how its so obviously stemming from some weird insecurity you have regarding some chick you've dated and her guys friends. you can't justify cheating because you dont like your girlfriend's friends. how old are you? 16?

anyway, i came back to dublin and found out this guy has been lying to me a bucketload about what he has been up to all summer. making out with and dancing with girls in bars.

i take back any bad feeling i had of the way i acted. i was actin gbased on an intuition that proved to be true. cheers to myself.

as for his, well, he's an *******, and quite a good liar. he also has some of my **** in his apartment. i'm not looking forward to trying to reacquire these items.

as far as you guys who think i am acting like a *****, if you were in my situation and a girl you were dating kissed a guy in a bar, you'd all be calling her a ho and screaming "NEXT!" therefore, i don't think a lot of your advice is very objective.

 

[illmatic20]

I think your not very attractive as you dwell over one guy like he the last single man on earth.

 

[Mr Spitfire]

Sounds like the most important thing in the history of the Universe. I couldn't even get through the story because I know I am not nearly important enough to comment on something so dire as to whether or not he may be seeing another girl(s) when you two have an "unoffical" relationship... Im speechless.

 

[TooColdUlrick]

Originally posted by Hayley79
haha, you think this is all because he acted pissy one time because i have guy friends? i can't even begin to count the ways of how ridiculous this is, and how its so obviously stemming from some weird insecurity you have regarding some chick you've dated and her guys friends. you can't justify cheating because you dont like your girlfriend's friends. how old are you? 16?

anyway, i came back to dublin and found out this guy has been lying to me a bucketload about what he has been up to all summer. making out with and dancing with girls in bars.

i take back any bad feeling i had of the way i acted. i was actin gbased on an intuition that proved to be true. cheers to myself.

as for his, well, he's an *******, and quite a good liar. he also has some of my **** in his apartment. i'm not looking forward to trying to reacquire these items.

as far as you guys who think i am acting like a *****, if you were in my situation and a girl you were dating kissed a guy in a bar, you'd all be calling her a ho and screaming "NEXT!" therefore, i don't think a lot of your advice is very objective.

um...why is it ok for a chick to date multiple guys, but when a guy does it, the chick falls apart. mind you, i'm not talking about an exclusive dating situation, just dating multiple women.